His words sounded so damn defeated that it hurt my heart.
“I have bad dreams. I relive every-fucking-thing. Literally, anything bad that’s ever happened to me, I relive it. The time I broke my arm and my mom was at work, I walked to her job, five freakin’ miles, with my arm at a weird angle. Every agonizing step I relieve in my dreams.” He shook his head. “Then there’s the time I watched a good friend get his head blown off by a fuckin’ sniper in Afghanistan. Now I get to add your fucking abduction, waking up to you duct-taped and tied down to a fucking filthy ass chair. Seeing your eyes stray to the window to witness your dog about to die.” He took a deep breath, and I shivered at the look of desolation covering his face.
“The worst dream, though, is reality. I wake up every morning with the taste of you on my lips, but you’re fucking gone. The smell of you on my sheets has faded. I can’t remember what it’s like to hear you laugh. Or the way you make me feel.” He shook his head and ran his hair underneath the water again. “I hate the way I can’t fucking breathe without you here.”
I lost the battle to stay away from him.
I went to him, wrapping my arms around his chest and squeezing tightly.
“I’m here now, Downy,” I said softly.
I felt his chest expand with a huge breath, and then he let it out slowly.
“This has been a pretty shitty three weeks,” he admitted.
There was one more thing to ask him before I said what I had to say next. I needed to know.
“Did you know what the implant in my arm was?” I asked, holding my arm up until he could see the incision in my arm where I’d had the GPS chip removed.
He turned around, eyeing my arm like it was a serpent ready to strike.
He looked at me curiously. “Your birth control? I thought you said that was good for two more years.”
I visibly wilted with his words. Something inside of me was set free, and I finally allowed myself to feel happy about my circumstance for the first time in three whole weeks.
I shook my head. “Not birth control.”
His eyebrows thinned when they rose nearly all the way to his hairline. “What?”
“When I was nineteen, I’d asked my mom to make me an appointment with my girl doctor for some birth control. I was interested in having sex for the first…” I saw his face contort into something that closely resembled rage, so I skipped forward to what I had to tell him. “My mom made me an appointment and then took me to the appointment where the doctor I’d had her call implanted what I thought was birth control… it wasn’t.”
He looked at me, and I mean really looked at me, when he asked, “Well then, what the fuck was it?”
I could tell he was getting mad. Really mad.
That made me happy that he would be offended on my behalf.
“A GPS,” I said softly.
“What the fuck? Who would do that?” he asked irately.
I sighed. “He had a good enough reason, I guess.”
He shook his head at what my mother had told me just that morning when I’d called her to ask her the very same question he’d just asked.
“Supposedly, when he was in his twenties, he got into some very bad stuff with the club, but he turned it around. In the process, he offended some of the members, and they left with a promise that they would retaliate in kind one day.” I shook my head, shivering now from getting splashed with the now cold water.
He flipped the knobs off and stepped out, grabbing a towel and offering it to me before he got his own.
He still hadn’t touched me, and that stung, but I’d give him the time he needed.
“So he decided to put his nineteen-year-old daughter at risk for getting pregnant, just so he could have peace of mind? Seems fucked up to me,” he admitted.
I shook my head. “Apparently, he found some evidence that the men who left had started terrorizing the dog that attacked me, Bobo, while nobody was looking in hopes that he’d attack one of the members. When the dog attacked me, they hightailed it out of town, but Daddy found them after asking some questions around the area. He got a lot of conflicting evidence, but most of it was about a couple of men terrorizing the dog. They’d thought the men had been part of the club, so they didn’t think to say anything.”
He shook his head. “That doesn’t fuckin’ matter. Jesus.”
He raised his hands to his head and ran his fingers through his wet hair. “Is it… are you… are you, you know?”
I smiled. “You know?”
I feigned confusion, and it was quite funny to see him so flustered.
“P… pregnant,” he choked out.
I raised my brows. “Would it matter if I was?”
He glared at me. “Of course it would fuckin’ matter!”
I crossed my arms over my sensitive breasts. “Why?”
He sat down heavily on the bed. “It would mean we’d be getting married right the fuck now. It’d also mean that I owed your dad a goddamned beer.”
My mouth dropped open. “What?”
He continued glaring at me. “Right now, would you be here this soon if you didn’t have a reason to be?”
“My ‘reason’ for being here, is because I keep hearing from everybody and their brother how much of a jerk you’re being,” I snapped.
“And who are you hearing that from?” he asked calmly.
Too calmly, if I were to be honest.
“Everyone. Literally. I’ve had nearly every member of the SWAT team stop by and tell me the progress on the case. How you’re doing. How I need to stop being a shithead and go back to you,” I replied haughtily.
He snorted. “Fuckers.”
I nodded in agreement. “But they were right. I was being a shit head… and I’m sorry.”
He looked up, giving me his green eyes, and smiled. “I’d do anything for you. Even wait three weeks until you came to your senses.”
I smiled, unoffended by his remark about coming to my senses. “Oh yeah?”
His eyes zeroed in on my breasts, taking in the new improvements.
Then I dropped the towel. “Tell me what you think about my new boobs.”
He swallowed, holding out his hand for me to come to him.
I did, walking straight into his arms.
“It’s true?” he rasped. “You’re pregnant?”
I nodded.
“About six weeks exactly,” I confirmed.
He let out a shaky breath and then buried his nose into my neck. “I’m kind of fucked up. I don’t know how to handle kids, either.”
I smiled, leaning down until my nose was buried in the curve of his neck. “We can fuck them up together.”
He chuckled and reversed our positions, leaning into me so I could feel his hard erection.
I widened my legs, encouraging him.
He didn’t waste any time sliding his full length inside of me, filling me to almost bursting.
The sex was sweet. Much sweeter than we’d ever had before.
Usually we were all about quickness and mutual orgasms.
This time, though, he was all about me.
Licking, sucking, twisting and thrusting.
I came three times before he ever considered coming, and when he did, we did sharing each other’s air.
As he came down, he said, “I love you.”
I smiled, tangling my hands in his hair. “I love you, too, my bearded dragon.”
He bared his teeth at me. “Take it back.”
I shook my head laughingly. “Not a chance.”
“You’ll take it back,” he promised.
Needless to say, after another hour of lovemaking, I took it back.
It was either that or die from too much pleasure. Something I wouldn’t have thought could be possible.
As I lay in a boneless heap on his chest, I said, “I like the tattoo.”
He kissed my head. “Good. ‘Cause it’s permanent.
”
I snorted at the familiar words.
“My name’s going to look bad on your hairy thigh in fifty years,” I teased.
He shrugged. “Don’t give a fuck.”
No, I didn’t doubt it.
Epilogue
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do will be remembered and brought up in a fight eight months later.
-A man’s rule to live by
Memphis
“Dadadada!” Lock yelled loudly.
Lock had his daddy’s mouth… as in he was really loud when he wanted to be.
I turned from paying bills to see Downy’s serious face on the screen.
He was talking to a reporter about something, but I couldn’t hear it over the loud music that Lock’s toys were blaring.
The scrolling banner underneath, though, said, KPD’s spokesman, Officer Lachlan Downy, comments on the SWAT team’s role in saving a young child who was kidnapped from Louisiana.
Shivers went down my spine.
Downy and the boys were asked to set up a roadblock on four major intersections through town since the kidnapper was suspected to be traveling to a family friend’s house in New Mexico.
Similar requests had been made nearly all over the state, but lucky for Downy, it was their little town that the man had chosen to come through.
Downy had been working on the one nearest to the Longview-Kilgore border.
They’d been there for going on eight hours when Luke had finally spotted the black sedan that fit the suspect’s description.
What really tipped them off, though, was the fact that the sedan had turned around on the highway when the checkpoint was announced on a sign about half a mile from Luke.
Luke called it in, and Downy was the one to follow him.
The man had run into a hotel off the interstate, and there ensued an hour long standoff where the man threatened to kill his kid, a two-year-old who’d been scared to death, with a straight razor he’d found in one of the drawers next to the bed.
As the SWAT team had prepared to enter with force, Downy had done his thing, talking to the man as he, too, prepared to go inside.
The amazing thing was, was that the man listened to Downy. After more than forty-five minutes of smooth-talking, Downy successfully talked the man outside, where Nico promptly took the man down.
The child, they’d later learned, was hidden from the father.
The mother hadn’t told the father about him, and when the father had found out, he’d gone a little nuts.
Sadly, the one to lose the most was the child, and he didn’t even know it.
“I hate seeing my face on the fuckin’ TV. Fuckin’ Chief,” Downy said from directly behind me.
His voice shivered down my spine, settling like a warm blanket over my core.
Jesus, but the man had the power to undo me.
I turned to my man and smiled, wrapping my hands around his neck.
“You know,” I said as I threaded my fingers together, while looking into his beautiful green eyes. “I distinctly remember hearing Mercy say that you were to stay at your hotel room. It’s bad luck to see your bride the day of the wedding.”
He grinned unrepentantly. “I missed my baby.”
I snorted. “You’re a sucker.”
He shrugged and buried his face into my neck, tickling my sensitive skin with the wiry hair of his beard.
We’d held off on getting married while I was pregnant. Then we’d held off on getting married because we were insanely busy with our new child, my new job, Downy’s new job in the police department as ‘Official Police Spokesman,’ and just everyday life.
Now Lock was eight months old, and we were getting married in less than four hours.
“I’m your sucker,” he agreed, letting his bare hand slip up the inside of the shirt I was wearing only to disappear into my panties.
His mouth traveled down to my breasts, sucking my nipples through the fabric.
“You know what you need?” Downy asked teasingly.
I shook my head, gasping as his mouth found a particularly happy place inside of me. “No, what?”
“My dick,” he said, carrying me into the bedroom.
“Lock,” I tried.
“Asleep in his playpen,” he said sternly. “Now shut up about our kid. Can’t fuck you if his name comes out of your mouth.”
“How do you know he’s asleep?” I gasped.
His dick ground into my core and I clenched my legs around his waist, throwing my head back in anticipation.
“Because I passed his playpen on the way. He was out. Promise. The dogs were also sleeping on either side of him. He was fine!” he growled.
I giggled.
Our baby boy was, what you would call, difficult.
He slept like shit. He was a crier. He wanted to be held fifty-nine out of sixty minutes of the hour, and we loved him with all of our hearts. That wasn’t to say he wasn’t a pain in the ass, though. He was also perfect and fell to sleep near instantly when he wasn’t supposed to be sleeping.
Which worked for us in this instance.
“Okay,” I agreed quickly.
It was rare we were able to find the time to do this, and we’d mastered the art of ‘using our time wisely.’
Sadly, it wasn’t just the baby’s fault. It was also Downy’s job as the official police spokesperson, the SWAT team, and my odd hours.
His mouth descended to my chest where he rubbed his bristly jaw over my covered breasts.
Sadly, we’d found that when we did the deed, my boobs liked to think it was feeding time. So in everyone’s best interest, they were now banned from the party unless I had no problem washing the sheets and our clothes afterward.
He missed them, though, and never seemed to quite be able to leave them alone.
Which was why he was currently lavishing them with kisses.
I could feel it coming, though.
Pressing on his head, I pushed him away from the messy girls and pulled him up.
My mouth slanted over his as I did a partial ab curl, coming a few inches off the bed to meet his lips.
One arm curled around me as he rolled, landing with me on top.
I was surprised to find he’d already stripped his pants off.
When he did that, I didn’t know. He was like the ghost whisperer… but in the form of pants.
The pant whisperer, was more like it.
“Jesus,” I groaned as he pressed my hips down to grind on the length of his erection.
He grinned, the flash of his white teeth through his beard had me smiling right along with him.
Leaning up, his hands left my hips and traveled underneath me. One went to my panties to move them to the side, while the other moved to his cock to settle it against my entrance.
“Fuck,” we both drawled as I dropped down slowly onto his cock.
He filled me to the brim, just as he always did. I ground my hips around and around, feeling the delicious fullness all the way to my belly.
“Put your feet flat beside my chest,” he ordered.
I complied, moving until I was literally impaled on his cock, the only thing balancing me was where his hands rested at my hips and my hands that were against his thighs, causing my chest to arch.
“God, you look so sexy,” he said as he lifted my hips, moving me up and down slowly on his cock.
“Mmmm,” I said, no longer able to push forth a coherent thought through my rapidly losing control brain.
He lifted up, causing our chests to press deliciously close.
This way I was able to balance more, allowing me to move faster and faster on his cock.
He helped me, of course. He wasn’t able to stop himself.
Faster and faster we went until I gave up trying to help, just going along for the ride.
My orgasm blindsided me, bursting forth from the shadows of my core and blas
ting out like a nuclear bomb, stealing my sight and speech from me.
My pussy clamped down hard on his cock, which caused Downy to lose his own control.
He poured himself into me, bathing my insides with his release.
“You’re going to be late,” I panted.
He snorted. “All I have to do is show up. You’re the one who still has to get her hair done.”
I grimaced but didn’t contradict him.
It was true.
Lifting up awkwardly, I went to the bathroom to get cleaned up, leaving Downy to take care of himself.
Knowing he was there to watch Lock, I took my time in the shower, relishing the peace and quiet that I knew wouldn’t be interrupted.
Or at least I thought, anyway.
“Baby’s hungry,” I heard Downy say over the shower.
His cry started to make my milk let down, and I sighed.
There goes my shower.
Rinsing off as quickly as I could, because I knew if I didn’t hurry, he’d start screaming so hard he wouldn’t be able to eat, I dried off and went directly to the living room.
There I found my two men on the couch.
Lock in Downy’s lap, screaming his head off while his daddy read, what looked to be a report, over his head.
Shaking my head, I walked forward and took a seat beside Downy.
I hadn’t bothered getting dressed.
It would’ve been for nothing, seeing as Lock refused to eat unless we were skin to skin.
Which I’d found was very inconvenient.
I’d had to start bottle-feeding him while we were out, because I was fairly positive Downy wouldn’t like it if I was naked at the restaurant table.
Once I was situated, I took Lock off Downy’s lap, placing him to my breast as I leaned into Downy’s body.
He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close, allowing me the support of his body as I fed our son.
“Must be an interesting case,” I murmured tiredly.
“Yeah, you could say so,” he said distractedly.
I started to read but decided against it once I saw ‘rape’ and ‘torture.’
Not on my wedding day.
For right now, I was happy exactly where I was.
Code 11- KPD SWAT Box Set Page 60
