by J. R. Ward
Chapter Thirty-eight
Rhage slept late, very late, and what woke him up was bad news. The restlessness, the awful itch, was alive inside of him again. The Scribe Virgin's reprieve was over. The beast was back.
He opened his eyes and saw Mary's hair on his pillow. And the curve of her neck. And her naked back.
He broke out in a sweat, an erection popping up quick as a heartbeat.
He thought of the way they had come together after the feeding. And then again when they'd returned to their room. He'd reached for her twice more during the day, feeling bad about making the demands because he'd been all over her so much. Still, each time she'd smiled up at him and welcomed him inside, even though she must have been exhausted and probably a little sore.
And he wanted her again right now, but with a pounding need that was different than he'd felt before. This hunger was savage, as if he'd never had her at all or hadn't seen her for months. As he fought the urge, his hands curled up on themselves, fingers tingling, skin tightening. He was completely strung out, the very bones in him vibrating.
He got out of bed and headed for the shower. By the time he came back, he'd regained some control, but then he saw that Mary had kicked the covers off of herself. She was gloriously naked as she lay on her stomach, her beautiful ass a temptation that ate at him.
"Can I get you something from the kitchen?" he asked hoarsely.
"Sleep," she murmured, turning over onto her back. Her pink-tipped breasts tightened as the air hit them.
Oh, sweet Jesus. . . Wait, something was off here. Her face was flushed like she had windburn, and her legs were sawing on top of the mattress.
He went over and put his hand on her forehead. She was hot and dry.
"Mary, I think you have a fever. "
"Low-level. Not unusual. "
Fear put a chill on his craving to take her. "You want me to get you some aspirin?"
"Just need to sleep through it. "
"Do you want me to stay with you?"
She opened her eyes. He hated the dull look in them. "No, this happens. Honestly, I'm all right. I just need to sleep it off. "
Rhage stayed with her awhile longer and then pulled on some black nylon warm-ups and a T-shirt. Before he left, he stared at her. He could barely stand her having a slight fever. What the hell was it going to be like when she got really sick?
Havers. He hadn't heard back from Havers yet, and the doctor should have had access to her files for long enough. Rhage picked up his cell phone and went out in the hall.
The conversation with the doctor didn't last long, because there was nothing the male could do for her. As vampires did not get cancer, he hadn't focused on the disease and neither had any of his colleagues.
Rhage was about to hang up when the other male said, "Forgive me, sire, as I do not wish to pry. But have you. . . are you aware of how extensive her treatments were?"
"I know there were a lot of them. "
"Do you realize how intense they were, though? If the leukemia has returned, her options may well be limited¡ª"
"Thanks for looking at her records. I appreciate it. " Like he needed confirmation of how serious the situation was?
"Wait. . . Please know that I am here to help in any way I can. Even though I cannot be of aid with regard to the chemotherapy, we have the drug formularies for a lot of the pain medications and various other things she was on before. I can help ease her and watch over her, even though she will receive her treatments in a human hospital. You must call me. "
"I will. And. . . thanks, Havers. "
After he hung up, he went to Wrath's study, but the room was empty so he turned to go downstairs. Maybe Wrath and Beth were grabbing something to eat.
From out of thin air, a wall of leather topped with a head of long black hair materialized in front of him. Wrath's sunglasses were silver wraparounds today.
"Looking for me?" the king said.
"Hey. Yeah. Mary's moved in. Permanently. "
"So I heard. Fritz said she brought some stuff with her. "
"Uh-huh. Listen, do you mind if I have a little shindig here tonight? I want Mary to see her friend Bella, and I was thinking the Brotherhood could play nice. You know, suit up and all. Maybe Wellsie could come, too. Mary has me, but she needs to be around some other folks. I don't want her feeling like she's isolated. "
"Damn good idea. Beth wanted us to go to the city tonight, but¡ª"
"Don't change your plans. This is just real casual. "
"Well, my shellan was looking forward to getting away. She kind of likes having me to herself. And I, ah, I really like it when she has me that way, you feel me?"
Rhage smiled a little as Wrath's body released a blast of heat. "Yeah. I do. "
There was a pause. The king said, "My brother, is there something else?"
"Ah, yeah. Mary's going to be very ill soon. I'll go out nightly with the brothers for as long as I can, but when things get hard¡ª"
"Of course. You do what you have to do. "
"Thanks, man. "
Wrath shook his head. "You know something¡ªyou're a male of worth. You really are. "
"Yeah, well, just keep it to yourself. I've got a reputation as an egocentric asshole to protect. "
"Tohr, I could see doing this. Phury, absolutely. Maybe V. "
Rhage frowned. "You make it sound like it's a sacrifice, for chrissakes. I love her. "
"That is the sacrifice. You love her even though you know she's leaving unto the Fade. "
"She's not going anywhere. " Rhage bit down on his molars. "She'll be fine. It'll be rough, but she will be fine. "
"Forgive me. " Wrath bowed his head. "Of course she will. "
Rhage looked down. He didn't know what to do with the apology because he only had experience in offering them. And besides, anytime he thought about Mary dying, he felt like he had a blowtorch in his chest cavity.
"Later, my lord," he said, wanting to leave before he disgraced himself by becoming emotional.
Except as he glanced up, it was into Wrath's eyes for the very first time. The king never took his sunglasses off. Ever.
Rhage stopped breathing, focusing on the iridescent, silver-green irises staring back at him. There were no pupils really, just two little dots of black. And the warmth in those blind, glowing circles was shocking.
"You make me proud to call you brother," Wrath said.
Rhage felt heavy arms come around him as he was pulled against a solid chest. He tensed, but then let himself hang on to Wrath's massive shoulders.
"Wrath?"
"Yeah?"
Rhage opened his mouth to speak, but lost his voice.
Wrath replied into the silence, "We are all going to be there for you. So you're going to ask for help when you need it. And if the time comes, she will be afforded a full Fade ceremony, as the shellan of a warrior deserves. "
Rhage squeezed his eyes shut. "Thank you. . . my lord. "
Later that night Mary stood in their bathroom, brushing her hair out and blowing it dry. When she was finished, she looked at herself in the mirror and smoothed down the brunette waves. They were soft under her fingers, and in this light the color did have a little gold and red in it.
She refused to think of going bald again. Just put the thought right out of her mind. God knew, there'd be time to dwell on it when it actually happened.
"You're still as beautiful as you were yesterday," Rhage said as he got out of the shower. While he toweled off, he came up behind her and blew her reflection a kiss.
She smiled. "Thank you so much for inviting Bella and John over. She's become such a good friend, and I've been worried about him. "
"I don't want you to lose touch with people just because you're here. Besides, the Brotherhood needs to play civilized every once in a while. It's good for us. "
"You know, Tohrment and Wellsie are so kind to take John in. "
"They're the best, those two. "
As Rhage left the bath, the eyes of his tattoo stared out at her. The effect was eerie, she thought, but not exactly unpleasant. It was kind of like being watched by a guard dog who really wanted you to pet him.
She went over and sat on the edge of the bed. "Hey, I'm sorry if I kept you awake this morning. I toss and turn a lot when the fevers come. "
Rhage came out of the closet, zipping up a pair of black pants. "You didn't bother me at all. But can we do anything about them?"
"Not really. I'll go into another bedroom if it bothers you. " She laughed at the look he gave her. "Okay, I won't be doing that. "
"About Havers. I was hoping there'd be something we could do for you. "
"Don't worry. And I appreciate your trying. "
"When are you going to see your oncologist again?"
"Soon, but no more talking about that, okay? Tonight, it's all about life. I feel good, and I'm not wasting one damned minute of it. "
Rhage's mouth lifted at the corners, his eyes glowing with approval, respect.
And she'd thought for even a moment about shutting him out? Idiot.
She smiled back at him, looking forward to the end of the evening, when they could be alone together. In the dark. With nothing between them.
When he disappeared into the closet, she went after him, thinking they had a few minutes before the party began so maybe they could get a headstart. While he stared at the dress shirts that were lined up on hangers, she put her hand on his back, right on the beast's shoulder.
Rhage flinched and stepped away.
"Are you hurt?" she asked.
As she circled around him, he kept turning away, the two of them trading places a couple of times.
"Rhage¡ª"
"We need to hurry or we're going to be late. " His voice was a little hoarse, his pecs twitching.
"What's wrong with your back?"
He peeled a shirt off a hanger and pulled it on, buttoning the thing quickly. "Back's fine. "
Rhage gave her a peck on the cheek and quickly squeaked by her. Out in the bedroom he opened the door that led into the hall and then picked up his watch from the dresser and put the thing on his wrist. His fingers trembled as he did up the clasp.
Just as she was going to ask him what was wrong, Phury appeared in the doorway.
"Hey, my brother, Mary," the man said with a smile. "You want to go down together?"
Mary hid her frustration. And decided if there had to be an interruption, she couldn't think of a better-looking one. Phury's glorious, multicolored hair was fanned out around his broad shoulders, and he was dressed to kill. In the proverbial sense. His suit was blue-black and subtly pin-striped, and his pale pink shirt showed off his thick throat and ridiculously good coloring. His loafers were slick as hell, his French cuffs were anchored with heavy gold links, and he was sporting a diamond pinkie ring.
The brother was total GQ material. And Bella and he would look really good together, she thought.
"Tell me, Phury, have you met Bella yet?"
The guy fiddled with the handkerchief in his breast pocket, even though the thing wasn't out of place. "Yeah, I met her. The night you and the boy came to the center. "
"She's coming this evening. "
"I, ah, I know. "
"And she's not seeing anyone right now. "
Boy, that blush really did it, she thought. Phury was adorable.
"He's not interested," Rhage said while cupping a handgun to the small of his back.
Mary shot her man a dirty look, which he missed as he pulled on his jacket.
"But you're single, too," she said to Phury. "Aren't you?"
"Oh, he's single, all right. "
"Rhage, how about you let him answer? So Phury, if both of you are free, why don't you ask her to have dinner sometime?"
Phury smoothed his lapels, blushing even more. "Yeah, I don't know about that. "
"She's really fabulous¡ª"
Rhage shook his head and ushered her out into the hall. "Leave it alone, Mary. Come on. "
Halfway down the stairs, she pulled Rhage to a stop. As Phury got ahead of them, she whispered, "Give it a break, will you? Bella and he might enjoy each other. "
"The only thing Bella would get out of Phury is conversation. "
"What the¡ª"
"He doesn't do females. "
"He's gay?"
"No, but don't push Bella on him, okay? It isn't fair to either one of them. "
Mary's eyes shot to Phury, who'd just stepped onto the foyer's mosaic floor. Even with his slight limp, he had the swagger of a man who had all of his parts in working order. But maybe that was just an illusion. Maybe he'd been injured while fighting.
"Is he, you know, impotent?"
"Not as far as I know. He's celibate. "
God, what a waste, she thought, eyeing the way the man moved.
"So he's in some kind of religious order?"
"No. "
"Then why?"
"With Phury, all roads lead back to his twin, Zsadist. And yes, I know they don't look alike. " Rhage gave her a little nudge and she started down the stairs again.
"Why does Phury limp?"
"He has a prosthesis. He lost half his left leg. "
"Good lord, how?"
"He shot it off. "
Mary stopped. "What? Did it happen by mistake?"
"Nope, on purpose. Mary, come on, we can finish this later. " He took her hand and pulled her forward.
Bella stepped through the mansion's vestibule with the doggen who'd driven her to the compound. As she looked around, she was stunned. Her family owned a grand house, but it was nothing like this. This was. . . royal living. Which she supposed made sense, because the Blind King and his queen made their residence here.
"Welcome, Bella," a deep male voice said.
She turned and saw the brother with the multicolored hair, the one who had interrupted her and Zsadist that night at the training center.
"I'm Phury. We met before. At the gym. "
"Warrior," she said, bowing fully. It was hard not to be in awe of the brothers, especially one like this. So big. So. . . Was that hair for real?
"We're glad you could come. " He smiled at her, his yellow eyes warm. "Here, let me help you with your coat. "
When it was off, she looped the thing over her arm. "I can't believe I'm here, to tell you the truth. Mary! Hi!"
The two of them embraced and then they talked with Phury. Before long Bella was completely comfortable around the warrior. There was just something so calm and trustworthy about him, and those eyes were a knockout. They were honest-to-God yellow.
Attractive as he was, though, she was looking for the scarred brother. While keeping up with the conversation, she discreetly scanned the vast, colorful foyer. Zsadist was nowhere around. Maybe he was skipping the party. He didn't seem like the social type; that was for sure.
As Mary left to be with Rhage, Bella was determined not to feel let down. For God's sake, she had no business chasing after the likes of Zsadist, anyway.
"So, Phury," she said. "May I. . . I know this is rude, but I just have to touch your hair. " She reached up before he could say no and captured some of the blond and red waves, rubbing the thick lengths in her hand. "How gorgeous. The colors are amazing. And. . . oh, it smells so good. What kind of shampoo do you use?"
She looked into his eyes, expecting him to make some kind of light comment. Instead he was frozen stiff. Wasn't even blinking as he stared down at her.
And she suddenly realized that Rhage was staring at her from a doorway with an expression of shock on his face. And so was another warrior with a goatee. And a large human male. And. . .
Well, the party had kind of ground to a halt, hadn't it?
She dropped her hand and whispered, "I'm so sorry. I just did something horribly improper, didn't I
?"
Phury snapped out of whatever trance he'd been in. "No. It's all right. "
"Then why is everyone looking at me?"
"They're not used to seeing me with. . . that is, no females. . . ah. . . " Phury took her hand and gave it a squeeze. "Bella, you didn't do anything wrong. Seriously. And don't worry about my brothers, okay? They're just jealous because they want you touching their hair. "
But something was still seriously off with him, and she wasn't surprised when he excused himself a moment later.
A doggen stepped in front of her. "Forgive me, madam, I should have taken your coat earlier. "
"Oh, thank you. "
After she dropped it into the male's hands, she realized the party had migrated into what looked like a billiard room. She was about to head over when she felt a cold draft coming from somewhere behind her. Had the front doors blown open?
She turned around.
Zsadist was in a dim corner by the vestibule, staring at her from the shadows. He was dressed in the same kind of black turtleneck and loose black pants he'd worn the last time she'd seen him, and just as before, his night eyes were feral. Sexual.
Oh, yes, she thought as she flushed. This was why she had come. She'd had to see this male again.
Taking a deep breath, she went up to him.
"Hello. " When he said nothing, she forced a little smile. "Lovely evening, isn't it?"
"Did you like the feel of my twin?'
That was his twin? How could the two of them. . . Well, there was a resemblance. If she imagined Zsadist's scar gone and his hair grown out
"I asked you a question, female. Did his hair feel good to you?" Black eyes traveled down her body, tracing the lines of the silk blouse and the tight skirt she wore. When they returned to her face, they lingered on her mouth. "You gonna answer me, female?"
"Bella," she murmured automatically. "Please call me Bella. "
Zsadist's stare grew hooded. "Do you think my brother's beautiful?"
"Ah. . . he's handsome, yes. "
"Handsome. Yeah, that's the word. Tell me something, do you want him badly enough to lie with me?"
Heat bloomed in her, a fire lit by the words he spoke and the way he stared at her with sex in his eyes. But then she realized what he'd said.
"I'm sorry, I don't understand¡ª"
"My twin's celibate from his tongue to his toes. So I'm afraid I'm the closest you'll ever get to Phury. " He made a clucking sound. "But I'm a poor substitute, aren't I?"
Bella put her hand up to her neck, drowning in images of being under Zsadist's body while he moved inside of her.
What would that be like? To be taken by him? The reckless part of her was desperate to know.
Oh, God. Just thinking about it made her shake.
Zsadist laughed coolly.
"Have I shocked you? Sorry. Just trying to help you out of your rock and hard place. Wanting something you can't have must be a bitch. " His eyes latched on to her throat. "Myself, I've never had that problem. "
As she swallowed, he tracked the movement. "Problem?" she whispered.
"What I want, I take. "
Yes, she thought. You certainly do, don't you.
In a burning rush, she imagined him looking down at her while their bodies were merged, his face inches from her own. The fantasy had her lifting her arm. She wanted to run her fingertip down that scar until it got to his mouth. Just to know the feel of him.
With a quick jerk to the side, Zsadist dodged the contact, eyes flaring as if she'd shocked him. The expression was buried fast.
In a flat, cold voice he said, "Careful there, female. I bite. "
"Will you ever say my name?"
"How about a drink, Bella?" Phury interjected. He took her elbow. "The bar's over here in the billiard room. "
"Yeah, take her away," Zsadist drawled. "You're such a good hero, brother. Always saving somebody. And you should know, she thinks you're handsome. "
Phury's face tightened, but he said nothing as he led her across the foyer.
When she looked back, Zsadist was gone.
Phury gave her arm a tug to get her attention. "You need to stay away from him. " When she didn't respond, the warrior pulled her into a corner and gripped her shoulders. "My twin's not broken. He's ruined. Do you understand the difference? With broken, maybe you can fix things. Ruined? All you can do is wait to bury him. "
Her mouth opened slightly. "That's so. . . callous. "
"That's reality. If he dies before I do, it will kill me. But that doesn't change what he is. "
She pointedly separated herself from the male. "I'll keep that in mind. Thanks. "
"Bella¡ª"
"You were going to get me a drink?"
