by J. S. Cooper
My head dropped forward as I grew tired. I just wanted to sleep. I wanted to sleep and forget that any of this had ever happened, not because I was scared of this moment but because my heart ached for all the moments of the last week, for the devastating truth that I’d had to accept. It wasn’t about fear of the man in front of me—but I couldn’t even look at him without feeling a gamut of emotions from heartache to guilt. This moment was poetic justice; the weaving paths of our forefathers had led us inevitably here. I knew there was nothing either of us could say or do to change the direction our paths had led us down.
“I didn’t want everything to go like this.” He held the gun to my head. “You understand that, right? I don’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want it to come to this.”
I nodded my understanding, my throat too constricted to speak. My body was frozen in fear as an image of a black stallion running down a white sandy beach flashed into my mind. I’m not sure where the image came from, but somehow it calmed me.
“A life for a life, right?” His voice sounded broken and raw. “That’s what they say.” His voice echoed his sorrow. I could tell he thought he had no other option. I couldn’t allow myself to look up at him. All I could think was, Is this how it’s all going to end for me?
“He shouldn’t have done that to my parents, Bianca.” His voice was pained. “He ruined my life.”
“I understand,” I said softly, my voice cracking as I spoke. I did understand. I didn’t know if I could blame him. “It’s not your fault.”
“You’re making this hard for me, Bianca.” He sighed and moved the gun away from my head, kneeling down next to my chair. He grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him. His eyes gazed into mine and I could see the regret shining at me. Regret, and another emotion I recognized. My heart thudded as I stared back at him. I still had a shot at changing my story. The emotion in his eyes was one I knew well. It was a gaze of adoration. He still had feelings for me. That was the opening I needed to try and change his mind.
“You don’t have to do this,” I said softly. “You don’t have to go through with it.”
“I do,” he said, but his voice was unsure as he gazed at me, his eyes scrutinizing my face.
“No. If you do this, we can’t be together.” I nearly choked on the words, but I had to say them. It was my only chance.
“You would want to be with me?” He froze. “After all this?”
“Yes.” I nodded and made myself smile. “We’re meant to be together, don’t you see that?”
“It was always you, you know.” His fingers touched my leg. “From the first time I saw you, I knew.”
“So then don’t do this!” I pleaded with him. “This doesn’t have to be the end for us. This can be the beginning!”
“A new beginning?” He spoke softly, his eyes glazing over as he considered what I’d said.
“Maybe this is why everything happened,” I said, almost choking on my words. “Maybe we’re meant to be together. Maybe this was fate’s cruel joke on us. Maybe this was the only way we could be together.”
“Maybe.” He nodded and stepped back. My body was trembling as I waited for him to decide what he was going to do next. “You really think we’re soul mates?” He stared at my lips and it took everything in me not to shudder. And then, suddenly, there was a loud bang. I screamed. He fell forward, his head hitting my lap hard, and I screamed again.
“No!” I could feel tears falling from my eyes as blood, red and sticky, pooled in my lap. “Nooo!” I screamed, looking into his face. What had just happened? I wasn’t even sure. He gazed at me with a weak smile, the life draining from his face.
“Your father did this to us,” he mumbled. “He did this to me . . .”
“No,” I whispered, my stomach churning as I felt a wave of arctic coldness fill me. “I’m sorry.” I meant it. This wasn’t how it was supposed to end.
“Hush, little baby, don’t say a fucking word.” This time his voice was but a whisper in the coldness. “This is how it should be.”
Don't miss the rest of the Swept Away series by New York Times bestselling author J.S. Cooper
Don't miss the first book in the brand new, dark and sexy series!
Illusion
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In this prequel to the Swept Away series that is best read after ILLUSION, Bianca is determined to find justice for her father after his death. But to do that, she must get in bed with his enemies . . .
Charade
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Bianca and Jakob have been thrown together and torn apart by their secrets—but can she trust him enough to rescue her at last? Coming Summer 2015 from Gallery Books!
Resolution
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J. S. COOPER
J. S. COOPER is the author of the New York Times and USA Today bestselling series The Ex Games and The Private Club, as well as many other series and stand-alone novels. Visit jscooperauthor.com, or follow her on Facebook or Twitter.
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After the Ex Games
The Private Club
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The Private Club 3
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Gallery Books
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2015 by Jaimie Mancham-Case
All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. For information, address Gallery Books Subsidiary Rights Department, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020.
First Gallery Books trade paperback edition March 2015
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Cover photograph by iStockPhoto
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Cooper, J. S.
Disillusioned/J.S. Cooper.—First Gallery Books trade paperback edition.
pages ; cm.—(Swept away ; 2)
1. Castaways—Fiction. 2. Man-woman relationships—Fiction. I. Title.
PS3603.O582637D57 2015
813'.6—dc23
2014045403
ISBN 978-1-4767-9099-2
ISBN 978-1-4767-9104-3 (ebook)
contents
Acknowledgments
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Resolution Excerpt
About J.S. Cooper
