by Tasha Fawkes
We hopped into the Jeep and set out toward today's site. I drove, and Brin hung out up front with me while Martin and Russell talked shop and filmed the landscape flashing by the windows. It was a perfect sunny day, not a cloud in the sky and not a worry on my mind.
"Where are we going?" Brin asked.
"You'll see."
Brin sighed. "You're the worst."
"Baby, you ain't seen nothin' yet."
With the help of Russell navigating from the back, we reached our destination just as the morning stiffness lifted from the air. It was going to be a hot afternoon, which was perfect for what we had in mind.
"We've got to hike in a little bit from here," I said, killing the ignition.
Brin looked uneasy, staring out at the thick canopy of green with trepidation in her eyes. “Do you think there are snakes in there?”
“Probably not,” I lied.
“Not the kind that you need to be worrying about, anyway,” joked Martin.
Brin gulped and I watched as she consciously tucked away the fear on her face and pulled up bravery in its place.
A moment later she had the steely determination of a soldier in her eyes. "Okay," she said. "What are we waiting for?"
I grinned and led the way, following the path around bends and under low-hanging branches, keeping an eye on the woman behind me.
Brin stared in wonder at her surroundings, stopping to smell some of the more vibrant flowers and craning her neck to admire the birds that fluttered through the chittering canopy.
I'd never seen someone enjoy something so much. I'd been in this business for long enough that I would consider myself to be an expert on hedonistic pleasure, but there was a stroke of innocence to Brin's enjoyment that made it so much more poignant. I realized she'd probably never been anywhere like this before, had probably never done anything like this. Through her, it felt almost like I was experiencing it for the first time too.
We finally reached today's spot, and I turned to watch Brin's face as she took it all in. It was worth it. The moment her eyes saw the cliff edge I stood on and the plummeting waterfall just behind, they bulged, and her mouth fell open.
"What," she said in a flat tone. No questioning inflection.
"We're going cliff jumping," I told her.
Brin shook her head and took a step back, keen on distancing herself from the ledge. "You're going cliff jumping. I'm calling in my veto."
Russell and Martin stood behind her watching. They'd just found their day's entertainment. I would have preferred to coax her off the cliff in private. Too bad that wasn't an option.
"Come on, baby," I said, taking full advantage of the fact the camera was rolling. I could call her baby all I wanted, and there was nothing she could do about it. "It's fun. Trust me."
"Nuh-uh." Brin held her ground, meeting my impeaching stare with an unyielding one of her own. "Don't let me stop you though. You have no idea how much I'd love to see you jump off a cliff after waking me up so early this morning."
"I knew you weren't over that."
Brin cocked her head to the side and placed a contemplative finger on her chin. "On second thought, can I push you?"
"Okay, okay, you've made your point. You get to skip this one." I looked over her shoulder at Martin and Russell, who were snickering to themselves. "Looks like it's just me. How long do you need to set up?"
Martin jumped to it, skirting the edge of the cliff and looking for footholds down lower. "I'm ready to take shots up here right now, and it'll only take me a minute to get down to that lower ledge afterward."
"Perfect."
I stripped off my shirt and dropped it to the side. Brin immediately turned away, her face glowing pink.
I couldn't help myself. I strode up to her, leaning over to whisper out of earshot of the camera and the crew.
"My girlfriend wouldn't get embarrassed about me taking my shirt off."
Brin snorted. "You're sure I can't push you off?"
I just laughed and stepped over to the edge. Then the fun began.
It was a great spot. The pool below was crystal clear and felt like cool silk against my skin. I jumped in a couple of times and climbed back up; then we sat back to review the footage and see what other angles we wanted to get. Brin watched, nibbling on her lower lip. She was interested. Whatever fear was holding her back from participating wasn't going to last, and I knew all I'd have to do was coax her a little bit and she'd open up like a hibiscus flower.
"What are you afraid of?" I asked.
Brin had her legs folded beneath her on the rock, hands splayed behind her. She looked like she belonged there, part of the stone and the trees like an ancient Hawaiian goddess. Lori had always stood out, whatever the surroundings were. I could never tell whether it was all the designer accessories and perfectly styled hair and make-up or whether it was just her attitude that did it, but nobody would ever make the mistake of saying that she belonged in the wilderness. The only place Lori fit in was the city. It was the only place she was happy, too. Brin was different. She seemed at ease wherever you put her, and with her hair trailing down her back and her face relaxed into an expression of pure contentment, it was easy to think that perhaps she'd always been a part of this landscape.
Brin turned to my question and pursed her lips, thinking.
"Besides the obvious death or dismemberment?"
I laughed. "It's completely safe. You've seen me do it twice already."
"I've seen you do a lot of things I wouldn't consider safe," she replied. "You have seen your YouTube channel, right?"
I met her gaze and held it. Martin and Russell were somewhere nearby, but for a second it was just Brin and me and the waterfall.
"Do you trust me?" I asked.
Brin's forehead wrinkled in thought. "I don't know. I barely know you."
I grinned. "Wrong answer. Do you trust me? Dig deep and let your subconscious answer that."
A moment passed, one where neither of us spoke but something passed between us all the same. And then, with a slow nod, Brin said, "I trust you."
The words felt better than I expected. Her trust was a gift, something I didn't want to mishandle. I rose to my feet and offered her my hand. "Let's chuck you off a cliff then."
Brin laughed and took my hand, and the guys got into place while she approached the cliff edge and worked up her nerve. That same gritty determination that had spurred her into the unknown earlier returned. I watched it transform her face, and then she pulled off her shirt and shimmied out of her shorts.
I'd gotten a good look at her body when she was onstage dancing, but this was different. More organic. My eyes tracked down her curves, from her ample hips to her bare feet clutching at the ridges of the cliff with her toes. She was gorgeous. Flawless. Her little yellow bikini fit perfectly.
"Whenever you're ready," called Martin from down below.
Brin walked to the ledge, and a bit of that nervousness crept in again as she peered over. Then she turned to face me, a massive smile dominating her mouth.
"Here goes nothing," she said.
And then she spread her arms and fell back.
Something changed in Brin after that first jump. It was like she'd chipped away the rest of her fear and now she was glowing. We did a few more dives from the cliff, and then we trudged back up to the Jeep and hit the road for the next adventure.
It was one of the most enjoyable afternoons of my life. We drove down to a deserted little cove, where I'd heard there was a perfect spot for snorkeling. Brin loved it, pointing out yellow and blue Triggerfish, reef sharks, and long, strange looking Trumpetfish. We dove down to get a better look a Stingray sailing along the sea floor, then surfaced together, laughing. She was chatty and excited, and for the first time, I felt like I was the one having to keep up with her and not the other way around. I liked that. I liked that she'd found something here, something that had made her come alive. Not that anyone could ever accuse Brin of sleepwalking through life.
When we finally dragged ourselves out of the sea, we collapsed onto the beach next to each other. Martin and Russell were somewhere nearby, though I didn't know if they were still filming or not.
Normally I would check in with them, see if there was any other footage we could get to cap off the day's adventures. Normally I'd be looking at the setting sun with a director's eye, wondering how we could turn it into the perfect shot. Instead, I was content just to sit next to Brin, letting our bodies dry on the hot sand and watching the sun sink below the skyline. We were quiet for a long time, but it was a pleasant kind of quiet. A companionable silence.
Brin was eventually the one to break it, dragging her fingers through the sand and staring far beyond even the sunset.
"This is the kind of thrill I normally go for," she said. "I know it lacks adrenaline, but isn't there something exciting and wild in watching the world turn?"
I chuckled. "Not sure I'd use the word wild."
She turned to me, though her expression was still far off. Her lips quirked at the corners. I couldn't take my eyes off of them.
"It’s like that Neutral Milk Hotel song. How strange it is to be anything at all,” she said. "And here we are, just being. Existing. Breathing in and breathing out, while millions of tiny cells in our bodies are performing a massive choreographed dance to keep us alive. And that gigantic ball of gas and flame is the instrument that's keeping us all alive. Sitting here, staring out at it, facing the object of our life and also our death." She shrugged. "I don't know. It feels exhilarating to me. There are millions of reasons we should have never existed, but here we are. The craziest thing you can do in your day is be aware of that."
When she spoke, she meant it. I got the impression that her surface fear wasn't the only thing that had fractured today. This trip was changing her, and I was lucky enough to watch the metamorphosis. It occurred to me that for this second of being alive, this moment of experiencing the thrill of merely existing, I had the perfect partner. There was nobody else I would rather be with.
"I like that," I told her, meeting her gaze. "I like that a lot."
Something passed over Brin's features, but I couldn't tell what. A moment of decision, maybe? Then the answer became clear.
She leaned toward me and planted her lips on mine. Desire quickly supplanted surprise as the electricity of her lips drew me in. Her mouth was soft, moving nimbly against mine. She tasted of salt from the ocean and something all her own, all delicious. I pulled her closer, and she sank against me, fitting perfectly against my side.
She broke the kiss. Her eyes were laughing. "There. Now you've had your brand of thrill too."
"You guys ready to go?" Martin called from somewhere behind us.
I turned and waved at him. He and Russell were packing up. When I turned back to Brin, she was already staggering to her feet. I cast one last glance at the setting sun and bid it farewell.
Brin and I staggered into our room hours later, exhausted. After a delicious dinner downstairs and a couple of drinks, both of us were ready for bed. My last thought as I drifted off was that it felt natural falling into bed next to her. How could one day change so much?
The only problem, I thought, sleep dragging me down, was that our relationship wasn't meant to change.
Nine
Brin
I came out of sleep gently, slowly becoming aware of my surroundings and the sensation of soft cotton sheets wrapped around my waist. My eyes flitted open to a room full of light, happy sunbeams splaying across the bed. I smiled, wide and silly like it was Christmas morning. Was there a time of day here that wasn't magical?
I turned on my side to see the bed was empty next to me. Everything from yesterday came flooding back, the memory cast in my aching muscles. Chad. A cliff. Snorkeling. A perfect kiss. Chad.
Oh god, I kissed Chad!
I slapped a hand over my mouth and rolled back onto my back, staring up at the ceiling as I processed.
I kissed Chad Harlan... and it was sensational. I knew I shouldn't have done it, that I was only his fake girlfriend and I'd made such a big fuss about not doing any funny business while we were here, but I couldn't make myself regret it. The impulse to kiss him had risen out of the blue and his reaction, his pulling me close and kissing the living daylights out of me, had been everything.
I glanced over at the clock and saw it was nine am. He'd let me sleep in. Shit, was he still here? I could already tell my hair was a disheveled, dry mess from being in the ocean yesterday. I could only imagine how I looked. My eyes flitted around the room, and I stilled to listen for signs of movement. Nothing. Thank god.
I hopped out of bed and headed straight to the shower. The steam and hot water pounding against my back helped finish waking me, and by the time I stepped out, I felt ready for whatever today had to bring. I pulled on the fluffy white bathrobe and headed back into the bedroom, where I sat at the end of the bed and started toweling off my hair.
There was a light knock on the door, but before I could get up to answer it, it cracked open.
"Are you decent?" Chad asked, peeking his head through the gap.
"More or less," I said. "Where'd you head off to this morning?"
Chad entered, carrying a tray with two coffees and a paper bag on it. I eyed the bag, mouth watering.
"I was getting you breakfast," he said. "And doing a little work. I didn't want to wake you. You looked like you were having a good sleep."
"I was. Thank you." I was already reaching out for the bag, making little grabby gestures with my hands. "Please tell me there's something with sugar in that bag."
Chad laughed and sat the tray down on the bedside table. He tossed the bag over to me, and I opened it, inhaling the sweet scent of vanilla icing as I pulled out the pastry. This morning was turning out to be a stellar one so far. I could get used to this.
Chad watched me eat, smirking. "You've got a real sweet tooth, huh?"
"Let's put it this way—if you cover it with sugar, I'll eat it. Probably my biggest flaw." I shoved the last of the pastry into my mouth and licked the icing off my fingers. I could have eaten twenty more.
"Oh yeah?" Chad asked, eyes sparkling with mirth. "Does that apply to everything?"
I swallowed hard, nearly choking on the half-chewed food. Heat snaked through me, settling into my core and burning me from the inside out.
Oh dear.
Chad turned up his mega-watt smile and came to stand in front of me, arms crossed over his chest.
"I've got exciting news," he said.
"Uh-huh?"
"Russell worked through the night editing yesterday's footage. We posted it a few hours ago, and it's already gone viral. Over a million views and counting."
I knew I was supposed to be excited by this news, but I barely even heard it. Chad was so close to me, his biceps bulging against the sleeves of his t-shirt, his manly scent drifting across the small space to fog my mind.
I'd always known he was hot, but when had he started being so seductive? I wanted to jump up and kiss him again, but I was scared. Worried. Insecurity began to trickle in, reminding me that just because he'd kissed me back didn't mean anything. I was his fake girlfriend for the week.
But then there was the energy that seemed to charge the room just from being close to each other like we were two opposing magnets forced apart.
God, I wanted to taste his lips again. The desire was almost overwhelming. I needed to distract myself.
"That's great," I said. "You must be thrilled."
"I am. Absolutely elated."
He stayed standing there, looking down at me. I licked my lips again, the last few bits of sugar melting into my tongue.
I couldn't stand this tension. I wondered if I should just ask him about the kiss, about whether it might be something he wanted to do again. That would be super awkward though. Why was I always so goddamn awkward?
"What are you thinking about?" Chad asked.
I laughed. And the
n, surprisingly, I told him.
"How much I enjoyed that kiss yesterday."
Chad didn't skip a beat. He leaned down and slammed his mouth against mine, threading his fingers through my hair to hold my face in place. I moaned at the sudden contact, heart racing.
"I was hoping you would say that," he murmured against my mouth. "It's been on my mind all fucking morning."
"What are we going to do about that?" I whispered breathlessly.
"Well." He nibbled my lower lip. "I was thinking something like this." He kissed me again, urging my mouth open with his tongue and exploring more.
We fell back onto the bed, and Chad scooted me further up the mattress until my head lay on the pillows. He never broke the kiss, deftly massaging my mouth with his firm lips. His stubble scraped my cheek. His hand ran up the length of my thigh, dipping under the bathrobe. I was suddenly aware of how naked I was under there. Chad growled. He was aware now too.
This kiss was more exhilarating than any cliff jump ever could be. Maybe if we went cliff jumping into a volcano, that might compare a little. My heart hammered against my ribs, blood singing in my veins. The room filled with the sound of our heaving breaths as we devoured each other, locked in a passionate embrace that felt as never-ending as time itself.
Just as I had on the beach yesterday, I threw caution to the wind and fell into Chad. Dove into his warmth. His kiss. I was his fake girlfriend, but this desire was real, tangible almost. If Kimberley were here, she would tell me to go for it, to go for him, because this was the part of the vacation I probably needed more than anything else at the end of the day. It felt like it at this moment, with Chad's hand wrapping around my thigh, digging his fingers into my flesh. He began kissing lower, gliding his mouth down my chin, my throat, sucking on the sensitive skin there and pulling out a gasp of pure pleasure from me. I was in heaven.
My core ached for him, ached to be filled. The throbbing sensation grew harder and harder to bear as his expert lips feathered over my collarbone. He inched open the robe as he went, kissing each inch of skin as it became exposed. His hot breath tickled me and I laughed. I fell silent when he parted the robe fully, exposing my naked body to his gaze.
