by Gill, Tamara
Where she belonged...
Sarah lifted her hand to her cheek, feeling the heat from her blush on her fingers. Oh, dear Lord. Did Molly suspect? Duchess Carlisle certainly did, she feared.
"Thank you," she said, standing and starting for the door. "I'm most grateful and will cherish it always."
Sarah fled the room, not bothering with an explanation as to why. She smiled in welcome to the few gentlemen who milled about the foyer, some of them heading toward the drawing room. No doubt, they had been playing billiards or taking part in the gaming room that Hugh had set up for the duration of the house party.
Her room's safety beckoned, a place where she could hide the drawing from anyone else having to see. What would they think if they knew the truth? That Lady Sebastian had captured her every thought, her every desire, and crushing need that coursed through her blood still, after being with Giles in the stable.
She was almost to her room when a gentleman who came out of the servants' stairs stopped her dead in her tracks. Giles moved into the passage, unaware of her rushing to her room. He glanced up, pleasure filling his features and leaving her breathless once again.
"Sarah." He came up to her and, checking they were alone, lifted a sprig of mistletoe above her head. He leaned down and stole a kiss. "I missed you now."
He stood back, his gaze latching on to the drawing. "May I see it?" he asked.
Sarah swallowed the nerves that tumbled about her belly at having this attractive, eligible lord, hers to do with as she pleased, before her again. "It's a silly sketch, nothing to mind." Sarah did not want him to see it, or anyone else. If Giles saw the expression on her face, reminiscing about her escapades with his lordship, he would know her secret.
That no matter what she said otherwise, no matter how much of a wall she built up around herself when it came to the man before her, he merely needed to clap his hands, and she came to attention.
Silly little fool that she was, she could not help herself. She wanted him. Had wanted Giles for years and wished that he'd been her knight in shining armor, the man who rode to St. Albans Abbey and saved her from her self-isolated fate.
He had not. No one had. Her brother Henry had made sure of that with his scandalous escapades in town after Hugh left.
He tipped his head to the side. "Let me see it, Sarah. I will not show anyone." He reached for the drawing, and she jerked it away.
"Did you draw it yourself?" he asked after a moment.
"No." She shook her head, her cheeks flaming. "I need to freshen up."
He grinned, knowing full well why she needed to bathe and dress for dinner. "Please let me see?"
He spoke in a soothing, cajoling voice, and she sighed, holding the sketch out to him. Not able to deny him anything, it would seem, for very long. "Very well, but do not say a word about it. I need no commentary on the likeness."
Giles took the parchment, holding up the sketch to take in the image. His mouth dried at the sight of Sarah, the distant light in her eyes, the knowing, wicked grin on her swollen lips.
He cleared his throat. "When was this drawn?"
Sarah crossed her arms over her chest. "Lady Sebastian was doing them in the drawing room just now."
The image of Sarah made his gut clench. Never had he thought an artist could capture a moment in someone's life so well, but Lady Sebastian certainly had. Sarah looked every bit a woman who had been thoroughly ravished. A woman who also enjoyed every lascivious, sinful moment of it.
He licked his lips, remembering their tryst in the stable. "May I keep it?" He would treasure it until the time came that he could have another one done of Sarah when she was his wife, and he was beside her.
"You cannot." She snatched it out of his hand, placing it behind her back. "What if someone sees you with it? They will ask questions."
He shrugged, nonplussed. "So what if they do?"
Sarah checked the passage for guests before rounding on him. "People will suspect if you have the drawing that there is something between us."
"There is something between us," he said, leaning down and whispering against her lips. He met her startled eyes, winking. "I want there to be something between us, Sarah. After what happened in the stables, I thought you would understand that more than any other."
"Ho, Gordan, I have been looking for you."
Sarah gasped, stepping back as if she were threatened by hot coals, her back coming up hard against the door.
Giles turned, smiling at Hugh, who strode toward them. "Albans, I too was just coming to find you," he lied, having had no intention. Truth be told, he was about to prove that he wanted Sarah in his life in every possible way that he could.
In his room. Alone, if she were willing.
"Come, man, we're about to start a game of billiards, and I need you to make up the numbers. All the other fellows are too busy cozying up to the ladies in the drawing room."
Giles nodded. "Of course," he said, bowing quickly to Sarah, before starting down the hall.
Hugh lingered, looking at the drawing that Sarah clutched behind her back. "I see you had your likeness sketched, Sarah. May I see it?" Hugh held out his hand, and Giles watched as Sarah stared at his appendage as if it were some crazed body part.
"No, I'm sorry. I will see you at dinner," she said, rushing into her room and shutting the door with a decided slam.
Hugh turned to stare at Giles, a frown between his brow. "Whatever is wrong with her, do you suppose?" Hugh approached Giles as he moved toward the stairs, knowing it was better to answer this question than Sarah, who seemed to be struggling with whatever was happening between them.
Affection. Enjoyment. Pleasure...
"I believe she is tired. I ran into her earlier at the stables. Maybe she needs a rest before dinner this evening."
"Yes, perhaps you're right." Hugh sighed. "Sisters, I will have to get used to having one again after all this time. Even so, I shall check in on her tonight to ensure she is well."
Giles didn't reply, not wanting to give Hugh any reason to suspect him of anything. Not yet, at least. He needed to win over Sarah before he won over his friend. "Tell me, who are we playing against?"
"Ah, Whitstone, and Duncannon. Both of whom believe we require a good trouncing."
Giles scoffed. "We shall see about that." He never liked to lose, not in a game of billiards or life. By the end of the Christmas house party, he too would win Sarah's heart.
Just as he had it ten years before.
Chapter 9
The following evening Sarah stood before the roaring hearth in the ballroom where some spontaneous dancing had been organized. The ladies took turns in playing the pianoforte for those who wished to dance while others had a turn about the room.
The room smelled of pine, one of the three Christmas trees at St. Albans Abbey stood in the corner of the room without decoration, the tradition of decorating the tree to happen Christmas eve.
A portion of the yule log burned in the grate. Sarah took in the many merry guests, conceding that it wasn't so bad to have all the guests stay at the estate. Over the few days that they had been here, they had been both kind and welcoming, not bringing up her time away or the reasons that occurred.
Hugh and Molly seemed to be enjoying themselves as well, and she couldn't help but wonder if they would return to Rome as much as they had stated they would. Certainly, they seemed very well placed here in Kent, with their new baby and marriage.
Sarah sipped her milk punch, her attention snapping to the door when Giles entered, Lady Rackliffe beside him, looking as pleased as she always did when around his lordship.
A prickle of annoyance threaded through her at the sight of them together. They made a handsome pair, both light-haired, attractive, and titled, should a marriage happen between them, they would be a highly placed couple in society.
So would you, should you marry Lord Gordan.
Sarah did not move, merely watched as Lady Rackliffe leaned up to whisper somethin
g in Giles's ear. He nodded before striding away.
Her hold on her crystal flute tightened before she took a calming breath, reminding herself that Giles had asked her to trust him, let him court her, not Lady Rackliffe. He would not play her the fool.
Her brother strode over to her, and she schooled her features, not wanting him to know anything about her muddled thoughts on Giles. "Sarah, my dear, I'm glad to catch you on your own. I wanted to talk to you about yesterday. You seemed a little distressed when I came upon you with Lord Gordan."
Sarah shook her head, wrapping her arm around Hugh's. "Nothing at all is wrong. I was merely tired after attending my horse in the stables. How did your billiards game go? I hope you won, as you wished to."
He smiled down at her, his eyes bright with happiness. "Of course. Whitstone was all talk when it came to his ability." Hugh chuckled. "Are you enjoying yourself? We have not left you alone too often, I hope. I do want our first Christmas together again to be a pleasant one."
"Not at all. Surprisingly, despite my earlier concerns, I have enjoyed myself immensely. Everyone has been kind and not bold enough to bring up Henry and what he did. Have you found the same?"
He nodded, his face clouding a moment at the reminder of Henry and what he had done to Miss Cox and Hugh, especially. "I have. Molly seems to be the most accomplished hostess too. How lucky we are," he said, smiling down at her, the love he had for his wife shining in his eyes.
"Molly is simply the best choice you have ever made. If I have not said before, Hugh, I am so very happy for you both."
"Thank you, Sarah. Your words mean a lot to me." Hugh gestured to the dancers. "I hope you're going to partake in a jig or waltz this evening. The most handsome sister in attendance should not be a wallflower."
"Perhaps I will." She grinned, hoping that Giles would move over to where she stood and ask her.
Hugh studied her a moment, a small frown between his brows. "You have been spending some time with Lord Gordan these past few days. Each time I look up, you're together partaking in conversation. Is there something that I should be aware of between you two?"
Heat rushed to her face, and she prayed he did not notice. "What? No, nothing is happening between his lordship and myself. We're friends, just as we once were."
"If I recall correctly, you had a falling out just after I left. Lord Gordan wrote to me and told me of his disappointment."
"What? He wrote to you and told you? What did he say?"
Hugh stared at her as if she had lost her mind, which, if she found out that Giles had told Hugh of her kissing him, she may very well do.
"That you disagreed over a trivial matter, and you refused to speak to him. That is all he said."
Sarah sighed, swallowing her fear and mortification that what she had done to Giles others may know about. And not just anyone, but her brother. "That is all in the past now. I have moved on from that difference of opinion."
Hugh's lips lifted into a half smile. "I am glad for it, for I do believe Lord Gordan likes you, Sarah. More than you possibly know."
Oh no, she knew how much Giles liked her, and she had enjoyed every second of him showing her so yesterday in the stables. Even now, her body yearned for his touch, his kiss, his breathy gasps against her ear when he'd undulated against her flesh.
"We're friends. Of course, he admires me." She sipped her punch to stop from having to say any more.
"I'm not blind, sister. I have seen the way he watches you, waits for you when you're not present. He thinks that I do not discern, but I do."
Sarah made the mistake of being caught in her brother's penetrating stare. She bit her lip, thinking it best not to say anything at all lest she blurt out her fear that she was falling in love with the marquess. If it were not love, it most certainly was already lust.
"He does not look at me so. You're too overcome with Christmas festivity to see clearly," she teased.
He chuckled, the sound mocking. "I'm not blind, no matter what you may think. I ask for one thing if there is anything between you. Do not cause a scandal by doing anything untoward. There are many eyes on our family, thanks to Henry. We must not allow the ton to have any further fodder to use against us."
Sarah nodded, shamed by her brother's words. Had anyone come across her and Giles yesterday in the stables, she would have been ruined. Her family once again the main talking point of gossip in town. She would have been dragged down the aisle to become Lord Gordan's wife before she could explain what she was about.
Not that being his wife was ever so bad. There had been a time that she'd wanted that above anything else, but he had chosen another. That that other person happened to be at this house party was merely an inconvenience. Even so, it did not change the fact that he was now courting her, not anyone else.
If she behaved, waited to see where her newfound friendship with Giles led, maybe they would be married before the next Season. "I will not do anything that could cause you or Molly harm. I promise," she said to her brother, just as a shadow fell before them both.
Sarah glanced up, her stomach fluttering, and she knew who was before them before observing him for herself.
"Lord Gordan," she said, dipping into a curtsy. "I hope you've come to our little impromptu dance ready to escort many a young woman onto the boards."
His eyes bored into her, the heat that she could see swirling in his blue orbs sent a frisson of desire to pool at her core. The man before her was determined to throw her life into a delightful turmoil.
"I am, Lady Sarah." He held out his hand. "Will you do me the honor?"
Sarah looked up at her brother, and the knowing look he bestowed upon her told her all she needed to know. Her brother had seen and approved. All that was left was for her to decide if she also did.
Sarah placed her hand atop of Giles's arm. He covered her hand immediately with his own, leading her onto the dance floor. "What is the next dance, do you know?"
The strains of a waltz started, and he grinned, a devilishly wicked light in his eyes. "I never leave anything to chance, my lady. Now, come here," he said, pulling her into his arms.
Sarah went willingly. At this time, should he ask her of anything, she was sure she would do it.
Even say yes to this handsome marquess.
Chapter 10
Giles made sure he danced with every woman present at the impromptu ball that the Duke of St. Albans had organized. The Christmas ball was still a week away, but with the need to keep those in attendance happy and occupied, a small dance did not hurt any of the plans.
The main Christmas ball would have the families of the nobility who lived close by in attendance, a much grander and more formal affair.
He had danced with Sarah twice already and knew he should not ask again. His interest would be noted and would only bring more eyes watching them.
He didn't need that annoyance. He wanted to spend as much time as he could with Sarah without everyone watching their every move. He needed to make her trust that he was in earnest. Explain to her, when the time was right, why he'd not thrown Lady Rackliffe aside when Sarah had kissed him.
That his betrothed had thrown him over had been a welcome reprieve from a choice he had not wanted to make in the first place.
Nothing stood in his way of having Sarah as his wife now. As much as he loved and missed his parents, they were no longer living, and he could choose whomever he wished.
The night was coming to an end, and he bid those about him goodnight, having already done so with Sarah before she took a turn about the floor with her brother.
Giles left the ballroom, heading for the servant's stairs over that of the main staircase. It came out just beside his suite of rooms, and there was less of a chance of him being accosted by Lady Rackliffe, who appeared determined to take up as much of his time as she could.
He pushed through the servant's stairwell door into the passage near his room, the paneled door unsuspecting to anyone walking up the corridor. A feminin
e gasp sounded, and he closed the door quickly to see Sarah looking at him as if he'd accosted her.
"Apologies, Sarah. I did not think any of the family were headed to bed as yet."
She clasped her chest, her eyes wide with fright. "You startled me, that is all. I wasn't expecting anyone to barrel through. What are you doing using the servant's stairs again?"
He glanced down the hall to ensure they were alone. "Avoiding Lady Rackliffe. She's quite determined to catch me under a bough of mistletoe."
Sarah's delightful mouth twisted into a mulish line. Was she jealous? Did she not like the thought of someone else vying for his attention? He could well understand the sentiment. He, too, did not want to think of Sarah being with anyone else but him. It had only been by chance that he'd stood by all the years to take over the title that she had not married.
Had he been a man, stood up to his father and demanded he was marrying whomever he liked, they could have possibly been married for several years by now.
But he had not. He'd been a coward. Had allowed his father's prejudice and threats to keep him away from her. Thank bloody Christ that he did not have that issue any longer.
He was a bastard to think that way, to be now able to court Sarah meant that his father was gone. Even so, his sire had been wrong to demand such from him. He would not do it to his son when the time came.
"Lady Rackliffe does seem determined. Now that she is a widow, you do not wish to try your advantage at winning her heart a second time?"
"Hell no," he said, his tone more severe than he'd meant to project.
Sarah started at his words, staring at him. "She will be disappointed," she said after a time.
Giles stepped closer to her, placing but a hairsbreadth between them. "Let her be. She is not the woman I want, as you well know."
Sarah's eyes twinkled with a knowing light, and his body yearned to pull her against him. Kiss her soundly until they were both sated.
