by T. S. Ryder
"I haven't seen you around here before."
"I just recently found out that my girls were shifters," Lana explained. "It's our first time here. And what about you? Are you a shifter?"
Clint nodded.
"I try to employ as many shifters as I can," Simon said. "Clint here is also a friend."
Lana fidgeted. There was a certain piercing gaze that Clint was giving her that she didn’t like at all. She tried to ignore him, playing with her hair in an effort to shield her face from him. It was a relief when he excused himself. The only trouble was, Simon left with him. Leaving Lana alone again.
It was even more awkward to be there by herself than when Clint stared accusingly at her. She wrapped her arms around her waist and watched the girls play. She wished that Simon had stayed with her. She didn't feel nearly so out of water when he was by her.
She repressed a sigh. These feelings had to go. She wasn't going to start pining away for a man, any man . . . no matter how sexy he was.
Chapter Six – Simon
Simon checked his watch and then his appointment book again. Lana was late. She had never been late to an appointment – always at least fifteen minutes early. She was possibly one of his favorite patients because of her punctuality. The fact that she wasn't there was cause for concern. His fingers tapped one side of his desk phone, waiting. Maybe she had been in an accident.
A knock on his door made him jump. Clint poked his head in. "Looks like she's late. You want to go for lunch?"
"She has two girls she just learned were shifters. I think a little leniency is deserved in this case," Simon responded, trying to look bored. "Five more minutes."
Clint's brows rose, but, fortunately, he didn't comment. Simon turned to his computer, trying to put Lana from his mind. It didn't stop him from looking at his clock again in another minute. Where was she? Had something happened? Or was she just managing her time poorly? He stood and grabbed his coat, determined to leave, then sat down again.
Katie was always late for everything. It didn't matter how much time he gave her to prepare. She was always just a little late and it drove him crazy. She'd be sitting at her dresser, putting on her earrings, telling him he needed to be less tightly wound while he stood at the door, tapping his foot and huffing impatiently.
A fond smile crossed his face. For the first time, thinking about Katie didn't open a giant, raw hole in his chest. Instead, the warmth of memories gave him some comfort. If she could see the way he ran his practice, she'd be horrified. He could almost hear her voice saying that everybody had their own things to deal with. Maybe he needed to completely reevaluate his policy about late patients. It wasn't fair for him to expect people to be able to predict everything that happened in their lives.
Maybe there were other things he could change as well.
He looked up Lana's information and called her. For some reason, nerves knotted in his stomach. He tried to ignore them. There was no reason to be nervous. He was calling a patient who was usually punctual to make sure that she was alright. There was nothing wrong with that, was there?
"Hello?" Lana's voice quivered, clearly indicating that she had been crying.
Every muscle in his body tensed, and his hands clenched over the phone. "It's Simon," he said. "Is everything okay? You're late for your appointment to discuss your surgery and—"
He cut off at the distinctive sound of a sob. Something inside him twisted, and his jaw tightened. Protocol be damned. There was clearly something going on with her, and he would be a cad if he didn't follow up. It didn't help that his Wolf started to whine and paw at his chest, demanding that he act immediately to soothe her. The words were out of his mouth before be even realized that he was speaking.
"I'm coming over right away. You're at 3892 on Bigelow Ave., right?"
"Yes," Lana sniffed. "Honestly, you don't have to come. I just forgot about the appointment. Can we reschedule?"
"I'm coming over," he repeated. "I'll be there soon."
Another sniff. "Okay."
Something inside him seethed, wanting to hurt whoever made her cry. He hurriedly stuffed his arms into his jacket and stepped out of his office. Clint, at a desk filing paperwork, eyed him.
"Five minutes are up," Simon said, knowing his friend would just take everything the wrong way. "I'm off the rest of the day. Go ahead and take the rest of the day yourself."
Clint's eyes narrowed. If he was wanting to dispell his friend's suspicion, clearly he had to do a better job at it. Before Clint could say anything, Simon gave him a rakish grin and began buttoning his jacket. There was one reason for him to be leaving the office in this big of a hurry that Clint wouldn't press.
"I've got an appointment with a hot redhead. Mindy something. Maybe Mandy. Or Margret."
The suspicion cleared from Clint's eyes, replaced quickly by disgust. He sighed and shook his head, but luckily chose not to comment. Simon made sure he kept his pace leisurely as he went out to the parking lot, even though his heart slammed into his ribs and his Wolf growled at him to go faster. Once he was on the main street, all bets were off.
It wasn't until he was at her house, climbing out of the car, that he really stopped to think about what he was doing.
Here he was at a patient's house. Not just any patient, though. No, it was a woman he had slept with. Before she was a patient, true, but what did that really matter? She hadn't even called him. He had called her. The sound of tears had brought him running, and now here he was. It was a stupid thing to do. And yet, he still slammed the car door and strode up to the house. He knocked at the door and waited.
It's because of the children, he told himself.
Lana wasn't a shifter, but her two little girls were. It was clear that she was overwhelmed by the responsibility. No wonder. As rich as she was (and she was rich, judging by the mansion she lived in), she was still a young single mother struggling with a potentially fatal disease and raising two children when she had no idea they were even shifters until a few days ago.
He just wanted to make sure she had the resources to give them the best care she could. It wasn't like there was anything inappropriate about that, was there?
Besides, these children were fatherless. He needed to have a life besides work and women, didn't he? Clint was always trying to get him to get a hobby. Well, maybe he was going to start helping out fatherless shifter children being raised by a single human mother. That might open him up to the same problems as having female staff in his clinic, but as long as he made a rule about not sleeping with the mothers, there was no harm in it. Even Clint would have to agree with him on that one.
He knocked again. This time, he heard a muffled 'come in' from inside, and opened the door. "Lana?"
"In here."
He stepped into the house and his eyes widened. Toys were strewn everywhere. Stuffing from pillows lay in globs here and there. There was a patch of yellow liquid at the base of the stairs to the left. Teeth marks were etched into the banisters and claw marks tore into the walls. He closed the door behind him, shaking his head. If he didn't know exactly what pups could be like, he'd have thought that there had been a robbery.
He followed the mess into the living room to find Lana sitting in the middle of a disaster: toilet paper flung everywhere, cardboard boxes chewed in half, smashed vases, a grandfather clock laid on its side, its whole face popped right out. Tears poured down Lana's cheeks, her whole demeanor defeated. She was still in her pajamas.
Simon knelt beside her. He wanted to pull her into his arms and kiss away her tears but held himself back. He had to maintain some professional distance.
"Where are your girls?" he asked. Given the destruction, he wouldn't be surprised if they were passed out from exhaustion. He had been known to destroy a house or two growing up, but never anything like this.
"At the park. My sister took them to burn off energy." Lana sniffed. She took a deep breath, clearly trying to pull herself back together – and burst into sobs again. Simon reacted on
instinct, embracing her, and she clung to him. Her whole body shook as she buried her face into his shoulder. "I'm a terrible mother. I don't deserve them. They need a mother who is better than I am. Someone who has patience. I don't know what to do."
He was reminded of all the times when Katie would burst into tears when they were newlyweds, declaring herself a terrible wife. At first, he thought that it was something that he did that triggered it, but learned it was just her insecurities about what she perceived she was supposed to be versus what she actually was. In time, he learned exactly how to reassure her.
Patting Lana's back softly, he let her cry until her sobs had subsided, then moved her to the couch and got her a glass of water. After she had drank some, he continued to rub her back.
"Tell me what happened."
Lana shuddered. "They both had nightmares last night and came into bed with me. Sometime during the night, they shifted. Their pull-ups fell off and both of them wet the bed. So it started off pretty nasty. Then, I was trying to get them to shift back so they could eat their breakfast and they wouldn't. They started racing all over the house, breaking things, chewing on things, peeing on the carpet. I didn't know what to do. They've never acted like that before."
Simon sighed. "It's part of being a shifter. Take the energy that a normal three-year-old has and then mix it with the energy that a puppy has. Also, it will take a while for their brains to really gel the two sides together. For many shifter children, it's like there are these two halves of them that they don't really know how to react to."
"I yelled at them."
"Everybody yells."
"I said that I didn't want puppies for children and I wanted them to be little girls, not animals."
Her face buried deeper into his chest. Simon stroked her hair, making sure she knew that there were no judgments coming from him. "My mother used to tell me the same thing, and she was a shifter, too."
"It's different from me, though." Lana lifted her face. "I could see it on their faces. It was like I was saying that I didn't want them to be who they are. I didn't want them to be shifters. And I couldn't help but think . . . is that what I really want? I know that they didn't change, that they're still my girls, but am I looking at them differently? What if I love them less now?"
"Shh." Simon kissed her forehead. "Shh. You love them. Anybody can see that."
"But—"
He pressed a finger to her lips. "No buts. You love them. You have to be patient with yourself, too. You don't know everything. Nobody does. As long as you are teaching yourself more about shifters and how to help your girls, it's going to be okay."
Lana's green eyes looked up at him hopefully. "Really?"
"Yeah." He smiled. "You can't expect to be supermom. You're allowed to be emotional. Just for now, though, maybe put the family heirlooms in a box in the attic. Hire a maid and a nanny. Maybe two. It will do wonders. Shifters traditionally raise their young communally. In my home, I had my mother, father, two unmarried uncles, an aunt, and both sets of grandparents, yet I still destroyed the house. You can't suppress instinct, but you can minimize its pressure on you. Oh, and lots of physical games and exercise."
"Is that your medical advice?" she asked with a teasing lilt to her voice.
Simon nodded. "As your doctor, I prescribe you a maid and a nanny. To be used whenever you need them."
She laughed and rubbed at her eyes. "Thank you. And here I am, a complete mess."
"A beautiful mess." His gaze flickered to her lips without even meaning to.
Her eyes heated, and Simon had kissed her before he meant to. Her warm mouth eagerly accepted his and her hands curled around his biceps. Heat flooded his body, making his skin tingle and loins tighten. Lana closed her eyes, leaning against him. Her body molded perfectly against his, and he found himself reaching under her top. The kiss deepened and he laid her back in the mess, holding her close while her eyes fluttered shut.
Chapter Seven – Lana
Heat swirled in her as his hand inched over her skin. Lana groaned with desire and a hint of trepidation. They needed to be quick before Kari came back. She needed to tell his hands to stop before they reached her breasts. But she didn't want to on either count. Her legs circled his hips, pulling him closer. They ground against each other through their clothes and her core tightened, a knot twisting in on itself. A cry burst from her throat, something desperate, clinging to this moment. Simon's mouth moved to her neck and she pulled him closer, her eyes fluttering shut.
And suddenly he pulled back. He braced himself on either side of her as he stared down at her, panting, a faint flush in his cheeks. A shaky breath blew warm air into her face, and he pulled away entirely. Lana bit back a whimper as he forced space between them. She straightened her clothing, biting back the desire to throw herself into his arms again.
He shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I shouldn’t have done that. I'm sorry."
He got to his feet and Lana scrambled after him. She grabbed his hand as he started for the door, not wanting to be alone. After everything that had happened, she wanted someone who wouldn't judge her or try to get her up and moving on by cleaning up. Kari never let her just sit in the moment, and it felt like she needed that right now.
"Please stay," she burst out, knowing she shouldn't be begging but unable to stop herself.
Simon gently removed his hand from hers and shook his head. "No. I shouldn't have even come."
"Simon—" Lana cut herself off and pulled in a deep, shuddering breath.
Ever since the twins had come along, people had been telling her that she needed a man in her life. Well, it looked like she had started to believe it herself. She stepped back with difficulty, nodding. He was right, after all. He shouldn't have come. There were professional boundaries for a reason, and they had broken enough of them. She didn’t want him to end up losing his job over her.
He hesitated in the doorway, looking back at her. He opened his mouth and her heart leaped, hoping against hope for something she could cling to, but he only closed it again and turned away. Lana's heart fell so rapidly that she gasped. She leaned against the door, taking a deep breath. It was for the best. Maybe, after this was all over, she could start dating or something. But only after this was done.
Her heart felt like it was all stretched out as she gazed at the mess of her house. So, she had a lot of this to look forward to until the girls were fully bonded with their Wolf side? Just the thought made her want to collapse and start crying again.
"I'll figure something out," she told herself as she started to clean up. "I just need to breathe. Just breathe."
She had cleaned the worst of the mess by the time Kari brought the children back. Evie's eyes drooped and Elaine's mouth was turned down in the pout that meant she was tired but didn't want to admit it.
"Come here." Lana held out her arms and they walked readily into her embrace. She kissed them both. "I'm sorry for yelling before. Next time I'll try to be better."
Evie snuggled deeper against her. "Sorry for peeing on the stairs."
Elaine giggled.
Lana gave them the last squeeze. "Go upstairs and get ready for your nap. I'll be up shortly."
Kari gave her a sympathetic look as they trudged upstairs. Her sister embraced her, but she wasn't as comforting as Simon had been. Probably just her imagination, but still.
"How are you?"
"Tired. I think I've cleaned up the worst of it. But we need to pack up everything that we don't want to be broken. I . . . researched." She wasn't going to admit that Simon had been there moments before. "And this is something they're just going to have to outgrow. Thank God we have a big backyard. From now on, instead of trying to get them to shift back, we can just send them outside until they burn off their energy."
Kari looked unconvinced but shrugged. "I hope that works."
Lana looked at the damage left in the house and nodded. She hoped it would work too.
***
Lana rubbed her arms, trying to dispel the goosebumps. She mentally reviewed what was going to happen. She was going to go to the hospital, get checked in, and then wait in her private room until it was time for the surgery itself. At that point . . . well, it would be in Simon's hands. They had discussed the options extensively and he had agreed that cutting out the tumor was the best course of action.
Her breasts felt very heavy, like they were rebelling against her choice to have them invaded. She tried to shove aside her nerves. She had given the girls kisses and they had promised to be good for Kari and her husband. She hated leaving them, but the sooner she got her medical problems taken care of, the sooner she could get back to concentrating on them.
Beside her, Kari gave her a tight smile. "It's going to be okay."
"I know," Lana said, but her voice was stiff. She was as nervous about seeing Simon again as everything else. They'd had one appointment where everything was set up. That was it. He had been stiff and formal, and she didn't know how he'd react now. It didn't matter what their past was. She needed her doctor to be comforting.
The hospital was huge and intimidating. Lana's stomach churned so violently that she was afraid she might throw up. Not that there was much in her besides stomach acid. She checked in quickly and was taken to the private room she had reserved. There, she set out the few personal belongings she had brought and changed into the hospital gown provided.
Kari sat and talked with her for a little longer before Simon came in. He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. Her nerves increased.
"Miss Flores. Punctual as usual. And you must be Karen."
"Kari." She gave him an eyeful, a frown crossing her brow.
Lana winced. With everything that had happened, she had forgotten to tell her sister that her doctor was the guy she'd gone to a hotel with on the night of the benefit ball. They shook hands and Simon explained the procedure for Kari's benefit. After they removed the tumor, he would be injecting shifter tissue into her chest muscles and breast tissue. That would hopefully make a blockade against tumors growing back in the same place.
