I keep my gaze on Roarke, who manages to crack a smile before trying to pull his lips into a tight kind of neutral line.
The last Saber flicks her hood back. I feel my eyes going wide as we assess each other. I’ve got no idea what I look like – but all I can think is damn. Blonde hair – but cropped short into nothing but fluff on her scalp. And her skin – someone could dip this woman in chocolate, and she’d come out lighter than the color she’s been born with. Her face is all fierce angles. Sharp jawline. Defined cheekbones. Her lips are almost the same color as her skin, and the devilish smile that parts them sends a thrill through me that reminds me far too much of Killian.
Only there’s no way she’s a DarknessSeed – Killian is the last one.
I swallow hard as Roarke waves for the women to follow him, moving at a brisk pace along the stream and toward the point where the horses will almost be able to step over it.
“Oh, wow, I love you,” Seth says, pulling himself upright and me away from watching that woman ride off.
Bralls, what did he just say? His words echo through me, making my insides freeze. I love you.
His hand rests on my shoulder as he brushes a fake tear from his eye. Which is about when he notices that I’ve gone all tense. I let out a shaky breath and move to walk away, but it’s too late – I’ve already opened this can of worms.
“What did I say?” he asks, holding an arm out to block my path.
I stop, and he moves in close, crooking a finger under my chin and tilting my head.
“Don’t make this awkward,” I warn him.
“Hasn’t anybody ever told you they love you before?” he asks, a worried crease to his brow.
It’s not a look I like seeing on Seth. My constantly laughing and never serious Seth.
“My mother, thirteen years ago,” I tell him. Not adding that I can’t quite remember the sound of her voice. Or that, until Roarke threw me back into the memory of floating in the well, I couldn’t quite remember her face either.
He leans in, and I try to step back, but he firms his thumb on my chin and locks me in place.
“I love you,” he says, soft and slow, pausing just short of his lips brushing against mine. “I love the way you laugh. I love the twinkle you get when you mess with Pax. I love that you scare Killian, because nothing scares Killian. I love that you keep Roarke guessing, because that guy knows everything. I love the way you twist your shirt in your hand when you’re nervous and you bounce on the balls of your feet when you’re excited. I love the things you say – everything you say. I love you.”
I grip the front of his shirt, though I’m not sure why because clearly he’s not going anywhere right now. Then I twist his shirt in my hand and realize I just graduated from twisting my own shirt to twisting other people’s – because damn, I’m nervous right now.
Not the kind of nervous that comes from having to deal with the angry Brahman bull, or the kind that makes a person’s chest tight and makes it impossible to sleep. No, this is more like a feeling that this moment right here, right now, is perfect and I can’t possibly let one second of it pass me by.
“Thank you,” he says.
“Thank me? What for?” I manage.
“For letting me say that.”
Letting him? I don’t even have a response. Who in their right mind would stop him?
He laughs softly and lets go of my chin.
“Now we both need a distraction.” He turns and moves three whole steps along the stream before declaring, “Here will do. Let’s flip.”
Rynn mutters every step down the stream, through the bloody stream, and across to the cottage. Just general complaints about the stream, the weildron’s nest they were assigned to remove that turned out to be a cluster of seven nests, and the report of her brother’s early release from Tanakan Prison. And that last one is possibly the only reason I let her keep muttering.
Commander Rose and the FaunaSeed – not sure what her name is – dismount in unison and lead their horses through the narrowest portion of the stream. A stream that flows up the gentle hill, which is one of the lowest items on my list. Way down under what ripped Eydis’ chest open? How did those Sabers take such a powerful Master by surprise? What is the small stone Kitten found? How is she accessing our powers? And where in the bloody Aeons is the bloody Spring?
Teegan dismounts, and I try my best to ignore her – her desire washed over me the minute we spotted each other in the forest, and it hasn’t eased off. The sensation is akin to her resting her hand on my knee under the dinner table, sliding it higher, and suggesting all manner of play right under everyone’s noses. It’s taking everything in me not to allow the blood to pump to my crotch. It’s distracting. It’s dangerous. And I didn’t have a lot of energy left to spare in the first place.
My Allure might not be hunting it, or seeking it, but her SeductionSeed is at Elite level, and its power enough to wreak havoc with my world.
Kitten can’t become the target of misplaced power. My Seed might be respecting her mortal soul, but I’m not risking her life by assuming it will stay that way.
“She’s real,” the FaunaSeed is saying.
“I thought she was one of Crown Lithael’s rumors. He likes spreading rumors,” Rose responds. “A power play to make us think Commander Pax has lost his sanity.”
“Is she mortal, though?” Teegan asks.
“I don’t know what one looks like,” Rose says, sniffing the air in Kitten’s direction. “She has no power, I can feel that, but I’d have to touch her to find out if she’s a weak Silvari or a mortal.”
It still takes me a few seconds to realize that they’re actually talking about my Kitten.
I take two sharp steps forward and cut Rose off mid-stride. “Touch her, and you will die,” I growl.
Me – growl. Interesting.
Rose meets my gaze. I have always been able to see why Killian likes her. Curves and confidence are a deadly mix. She lifts one hand, delicately settling her fingers on her chin and over her lips.
“What if you just tell me, then? Who is she, and why is she here?” she asks.
“It’d be best to forget she even exists,” I almost bloody growl again.
She shakes her head, very slowly, very deliberately. Teegan stops to watch, but the other Sabers have continued on toward the cottage.
“What would the point of that be? Either she exists – or she doesn’t. She can’t be both.”
“Rose.” Her name rolls off Killian’s tongue as the man hops the stream and joins us.
The flicker of lust that sparks to life inside her is so intense that my own power wants to join in. Already teased by Teegan, my control slips, and my power stretches hungrily. Rolling out, brushing along the edges of the women's desires, then skittering off up the stream to find Kitten before I have a chance to rein it in and bottle it down. I want to marvel at that – my power sensing lust and choosing a partner I can’t have to tune into. It’s… impossible.
There’s no satisfaction here. Not immediately, and not ever. And my power likes to be satiated.
Killian doesn’t say anything else even though it’s obvious more words are in order. ‘Leave Kitten alone, or I’ll cut your heart out,’ might be overdoing it in any other conversation. But for Kitten, the removal of a heart is almost under-doing it.
Rose rolls her shoulders, tightening her abdomen and clearly struggling with something that’s happening between the two of them. After a beat, she pats her horse’s neck and meets my gaze.
“I can try, but her existence is pretty damn enticing.”
Killian growls, and Rose throws both her hands up in defense, making the horse skitter sideways.
“Alright, alright,” the woman mutters, walking off with Teegan in her wake.
Though Teegan glances more than once over her shoulder to smile seductively at me. It’s a tempting smile, full of her SeductionSeed power.
Killian nods toward Kitten and Seth.
“W
e can’t let them near her,” I say.
Killian just rumbles, and I rub my hands over my face to try and relieve some of the tension from my growing headache. How do we keep them apart and look unified to these warriors? Warriors who have known only sacrifice for the greater kingdom, and who have lived in the unity of their triunes for more than a hundred years. Keeping her alive among our allies is going to be just as hard as worrying about our enemies. Technically, that turns our allies into more enemies until we know how they’re going to behave.
We have to be strong, stronger than them, stronger than Lithael and all his threats, and right now we are so very weak.
Six Paces
Seth coils, jumps, spins, and lands with complete grace. A contradiction, given the guy’s huge size.
“Your turn,” he smiles, taking my hips.
All I want to do is lean back into him and snuggle, his touch is so damn distracting, but I force myself to concentrate and follow his instructions.
By the time Roarke wanders up to meet us, with Killian in his wake, I’ve landed three solo flips.
“Not you too, Seth.” Killian points an accusing finger at the guy. “I can see what you said in your threads. Something’s changed.”
“Me too? I thought I was the first? Just me. Only me. No one else.”
“First what?” I demand.
“First to say I love you,” Seth says.
“Pax,” Killian grunts, counting off his fingers.
“Pax hasn’t said he loves me,” I blurt. “Thane said he wuvs me, but then, technically, he was just agreeing with something I said.”
Killian gives me a head tilted look – one eyebrow raised in surprise. Then he points at Roarke, saying, “And him.”
Roarke runs a hand through his hair, like he’s trying not to say something and that something is going to hurt my feelings.
So I get in first. “Roarke didn’t say he loves me either.”
Which makes Roarke purse his lips. Okay, so maybe that wasn’t what he was going to say.
“Doesn’t matter. Am I the only one not losing my wits for the mortal?”
“And why not?” My mouth shoots off before common sense kicks in, because if I had a chance, I definitely would not have said that.
I cover my mouth and try not to say all of the other things bouncing around on my tongue – like why did he call me ‘my love’ then? What did that mean?
My face heats, and I promptly turn to march away.
“Whoa, there,” Seth says, catching my waist and yanking me back. “Don’t be offended by Darkness. He’s never settled on a mate. No one is good enough for him.”
Seth spins me back around so I’m facing them all.
“Show me your weapons,” Killian demands, as if that’s the most obvious segue from discussing feelings.
Feelings to weapons, the concepts just go together.
“Why?” I ask, not moving a muscle to obey, because this sounds like something that is going to lead to pain.
“Where are they?” he demands.
“On the bedroom –” I start, then cut myself off as he pulls my dart cuff from one pocket and the blade from his other.
He flicks the blade, sending the sheath spearing toward the ground. I don’t wait to watch it land though, diving back and scrambling to get behind Seth.
“Save me,” I yelp.
Yelp, because right now the determination in Killian’s eyes says he isn’t going to stop until he makes good on his threat.
Seth wraps an arm around me and pushes me into his back.
“It’s not my fault. I was sleeping, then I was downstairs, then I was out here, and they were inside, and I can’t get them unless someone escorts me,” I argue, hopping from foot to foot so I can see Killian around Seth’s left then his right.
My body is geared up to dodge because running is out of the question.
Killian points the knife, tracking me as he growls, “I don’t care.”
“Seth, you should have asked her,” Roarke says.
Roarke asked me, yesterday in the attic.
“Yes, Seth, you should have asked me before carrying me down the stairs,” I agree, happily shifting the blame onto the big guy.
Which is a mistake, I realize, as he hooks my arm and drags me in front of him.
“I will happily search her body for evidence of her weapons at fifteen minute intervals,” Seth volunteers.
I lean back into his grip, all my attention on Killian with a blade drawn – it’s bad advice to ever look away from Killian when he’s holding a weapon. Especially since his gaze is narrowed and the man is baring teeth at me.
Suddenly, he leans down and yanks my leg into the air so hard I slip back and land with a thud on the ground. He Allure-speeds the cuff onto my ankle, and I haven’t even finished groaning when he straightens and drops the blade. Just drops it. Doesn’t hand it over or even put the sheath back on. Nope – not Killian. He just drops the thing, and it embeds in the ground right beside my pocket.
I gasp, then realize it missed my skin – though I have no idea how, because he didn’t take the time to aim. I grab it by the handle and yank it free before he can get a hold of it again.
“I don’t make idle threats,” he growls, as if somehow I’ve offended him.
He might be about to say something else, but Pax, with Jada right behind him, ambles into view from the stoned path that leads behind the cottage and steals all of our attention. The six women have settled their horses tied to the pen and gathered together in the square made of logs. That seems to be Pax’s destination.
Teegan and her triune bow, keeping a respectable distance, but Jada pats Pax on the arm on her way past – moving towards the still-hot coals and flickering remains of the fire. Not respectable.
Not okay.
I launch to my feet, only to have Seth grab the waist of my pants and pin me in place. That amuses Killian enough to gentle some of the angry look on his face, if I ignore the little flare to his nostrils, and makes Roarke rub his beard thoughtfully, but none of this is impressing me. In fact, a white-hot need to restore order has rushed up inside me – even though I have no right to choose or enforce an order.
Pax looks up to meet his brothers’ gazes before putting his fingers in his mouth and whistling loud enough to echo off the cottage and the boulders.
“Is whistling how he normally gets your attention?” I ask.
Seth nods, giving me a sidelong smile. “Yeah, things are different when he’s in Commander mode.”
“Different how?”
What does he mean different? I was beginning to understand the group dynamics, and I’m not sure I’m ready for things to change.
Roarke steps back, and Killian moves in next to him. Everyone walks toward the square log-seat setup next to the fire.
Two, Three, and Four in their order.
With me breaking up their perfection.
Pax sits on a log, one log all to himself.
I can stop time. That’s a sentence I never thought I’d be able to say, among other things. Let’s not go into the details on how I don’t exactly know how I did it, or if I would actually be able to do it again in the heat of a deadly moment. I’ve hardly reached mastery level of this new skill.
A Saber triune is on each log, and Jada is standing behind everyone. My guys beeline towards the remaining log.
“Keep. Your. Mouth. Shut,” Killian orders, making my heart race.
Life just got serious again. Like being at the White Castle serious. Even Sabers who are Pax’s allies are still going to be my enemy. There’s little chance Pax is going to explain my possible role in a secret prophecy – so I’m just a parasite on their beloved prince.
Princes – because I’m laying claim to all of them.
Doesn’t mean I want to make Pax’s life harder though, or that I have the strength to get close to Roarke, or the courage to push Killian’s boundaries, or the right words to tell Seth how I feel.
I�
��m doomed.
“I’m not sitting with you,” I whisper.
We’re probably still far enough away that I could talk without being heard, but my throat is constricting too much for volume.
Roarke looks down, possibly trying to read my expression. “Pax needs us to join this meeting. The others won’t stay long, maybe a few hours – ‘til dark at the latest. He needs to muster his forces. Both command and inspire.”
“Do you all have to sit or can one of you stand?” I ask.
“Why?” Roarke asks.
I nod towards the fire. “I can tend the fire. If I join your meeting, there’s only going to be more questions and more problems.”
“Pax wouldn’t like it,” Killian cuts in.
“You’re his mate. If you’re being oppressed, then he will feel oppressed too,” Roarke explains.
“What’s more important? If I sit with you guys, he’s going to have to work twice as hard to justify my existence,” I say as we step level with the ashes. “Have you forgotten Sabers are assholes?”
Killian grips the neck of my shirt and yanks me to his side.
“You.”
That’s all he says.
Then we’re at the logs. Seth and Roarke take a seat, and Killian steers me to the gap between them. I must resist just hard enough because he relents and gives me a shove in behind them.
I settle on the ground, mostly out of sight, with my head resting against Seth’s back.
For a moment I wonder if Killian does have a heart.
But I’ve seen what’s inside him. I was there, inside both of their powers for a split second, as I tried to concentrate on healing my arm – up until the point where I blacked out. One Seed balancing out the other. Safe with ice-cold perfection. I want to do it again, be there again… is it possible to get addicted to something that quickly?
I don’t wonder if the guy has a heart, I know he does.
Killian keeps standing. He plucks a blade from his belt, links his hands behind his back and toys with the thing, flipping it end over end. Despite not being able to see it, he catches it by the hilt every time.
Shadows and Shade Box Set Page 93
