“This is huge. I need more time to think about it.”
His mouth turned down. “That’s not like you. You’re usually so spontaneous.” Then he squeezed my hand. “Go ahead, give me one reason you can’t come to Chicago.”
“Okay. I don’t think I’ll be able to work. My friend Karen Leighton had to leave San Diego because she couldn’t get a work permit without specific, in-demand skills.” Dog massage was apparently not an in-demand skill.
“You could do something other than work,” he suggested. “What kind of job do you want anyway?”
“I want to work in some hockey-related field.” That sounded vague, so I scrambled for more. “Maybe become a producer, like for sports radio.”
“Isn’t that technical?”
“Kind of,” I said. Some of the old guys, like Don Johnson, started straight out of high school, but everyone young seemed to have gone to broadcast school.
“So you could study sports media in Chicago, and then get a job. It would be better since you’ll know people in the community.”
“But I need to work. I still have student loans, and I can’t afford more school.”
“I know moving is going to be a big sacrifice for you. So, I’m happy to support you in whatever way I can.” He didn’t say anything else, but I knew he meant financial support.
I shook my head, but Jimmy interrupted before I could say a word. “Kelly, you’re doing me a huge favour by coming to Chicago. Last season was great, but it was daunting too. I really missed having you there to talk to—nobody understands me the way you do.”
“I don’t get why you’re so focused on me. I heard you’ve been out with lots of girls, and I’m sure that’s only ramped up since you got to the NHL.” I wasn’t looking for strokes; I was genuinely curious. Jimmy seemed to idealize me.
“Do you not see how special things are between us?”
He lifted my face up and kissed me. His lips were soft and warm, but his kiss was forceful. Or maybe it was me, plastering myself onto him. There was this whole magnetic force field between us; I could feel my desire propelling me closer. Jimmy always felt more solid than other people, like he was made out of denser stuff. His arms enveloped me. One hand was on my back and the other was drifting closer to my ass. I rotated my hips slightly in anticipation, and Jimmy groaned and thrust his pelvis into me. I let out a little moan and his eyes flew open. He stopped and pushed me away with both hands.
“Jeez, what is wrong with me? I vowed I wasn’t going to be all over you in public again—and I’ve already done it twice.”
I couldn’t explain it myself. We started walking again. It occurred to me that he hadn’t really answered my question, but it felt needy to keep asking it.
That kiss was more persuasive than anything he’d said today. We had this incredible chemistry, which always drew me to him. I still couldn’t make a decision on the spot—which was clearly what Jimmy wanted.
“So, you’ll come back with me?” He looked at me with confidence, figuring that the whole lust thing would seal the deal. Probably a good assumption when it came to anything to do with us. But unfortunately for Jimmy, not this time.
“Look, I need more time,” I repeated.
He pouted. “But I have to go back home, I’ve got things on. I wasn’t originally scheduled to do this tournament—I only came to see you.”
“I know, but you’ve been thinking about getting back together for ages. I’ve only had a few hours.”
“Really? All the time we were apart, you never thought about getting back together?”
“Not really. I was thinking about hockey and then about getting a job.”
He groaned. “You know, sometimes you need to think about things that aren’t right in front of your nose.”
“And maybe you need to relax. We’re here together now, and all you can do is talk about the future. I need time to get to know you again. You’ve probably changed a lot in the past year.” I had missed Jimmy, but I didn’t miss his bulldozer ways. He was always adorable as soon as he got his way—but relentless until then.
Jimmy held my hand as we walked.
“Okay, Kelly. I have to fly home tonight, but how about if I come back next weekend, and we can spend more time together? And I’ll keep coming back, until you’ve made up your mind. I know I’m asking you for a lot, so I’d like to show you that I’m willing to do the same for you.”
He sounded so earnest and eager. “That’s really sweet of you. But aren’t you busy?”
“I have priorities—you’re definitely number one. And I’m sure it won’t take you that long to decide.”
His confidence was both hot and troubling. While it was fun seeing him again, I couldn’t make up my mind that easily. It felt like trying to do a puzzle without all the pieces.
10
Caught
As I cycled to work on Monday, I realized that so much had happened since I left there Friday morning. That was one heck of a weekend.
What to do about Jimmy? I wanted to be with him, but I didn’t like the idea of abandoning my whole life. I liked my apartment with April, and while my job wasn’t great, it did have potential.
Regardless of my decision, it was time to lose the whole fake fiancé. While April had suggested an imaginary break-up, I was done with lying and decided to wear all my crap and be done with it. I would march into Cheryl’s office first thing and explain the whole fiasco. She, of all people, would understand why the receptionist needed a shield against unwanted attention.
When I got there, she was already in a meeting, and then I started to lose my nerve. I decided that telling her at the end of the day would work equally well and would allow me to slink out immediately after. She was going to fire me over something this dumb, but it wouldn’t help my reputation as a sane and promotable person.
Minnie-from-Accounting came by to tell me all about her big fight with Jared on the weekend. When she took a breath, I asked her to man the reception desk while I ran out to pick up a catering order for a lunch meeting. I liked Minnie, but it would be a big relief not to have to talk weddings anymore. Last week, she had asked me if I preferred a mermaid or a princess, and I told her it was too early to think about Hallowe’en costumes.
When I returned, Minnie greeted me with a shrill squeal.
“Oh my God, she’s finally back! You’re going to be so surprised and happy.”
“What are you talking about?”
She pointed to the lobby, where someone was stretched out in a leather armchair. As I approached, he turned around. It was Phil. There was a moment of dissonance when I saw him. Phil-in-the-photo was boyish, carefree, and laughing. Phil-in-person looked older and more serious. Instead of a pair of board shorts, real Phil was wearing black jeans, a faded mauve t-shirt, and some kind of ornate belt buckle. Then he smiled his devilish grin at me, and the two Phils came together.
I smiled back and then panicked. What was Phil doing here? My house of lies was going to come crashing down. Which was what I wanted, but I was hoping to avoid the whole public humiliation aspect. Minnie’s squeals had attracted a few people who were milling about the reception desk, pretending not to watch the big reunion.
Phil rose and moved swiftly towards me.
“Hey, Kelly. How’s my gorgeous fiancée? I thought I would fly in and surprise you.” He swooped me up in a big hug and lifted me off my feet. I looked at him in shock and had a brief glimpse of his shit-eating grin before he planted his lips firmly on mine. It felt good, but the tongue part was totally unnecessary. I lost track of the fact I was at work until Minnie began clapping and one of the sales guys let out a hoot.
I broke off the kiss and hissed into his ear, “What the hell are you doing here?”
“I couldn’t stay away, honey bunch,” he replied loudly. “I missed you so much.”
Cheryl spoke up, “Kelly, I’m sure that we can cover the reception desk for you. Why don’t you take an early lunch and go out with Phil?”
“Oh, it’s okay, Cheryl. Um, there’s the planning meeting going on. I can see Phil later.” All I could feel was shock and confusion. My charade had come to life like the worst rom com ever, and I felt embarrassed and guilty.
“Isn’t she a hard worker? You can see why we all love her here, Phil. No, I insist. Why don’t you go someplace romantic for lunch?”
“Sounds good to me—darling,” Phil added. He was holding my hand firmly and wouldn’t let go. So I grabbed my pack and off we went, holding hands. I insisted we go someplace far from the office, so we got in his car and headed to Granville Island.
Once we had ordered our lunches at the Sandbar, I got to ask all my questions.
“What are you even doing here, Phil? Are you not supposed to be in Asia?”
“Why Kelly, I thought I was doing you a favour.” Phil seemed amused at my exasperation.
“How’s that?”
“Well, any guy who was engaged to a beautiful girl like you…” he brushed a strand of hair back from my face, “…would never let months go by without seeing her.”
“How did you even—oh man, it was Ben Cho, wasn’t it? When did he tell you?”
Phil grinned. He seemed to find this whole deal beyond amusing. “I saw him in Hong Kong. But he didn’t understand why you were doing it. I told him it was wish fulfilment—your personal fantasy.”
My mouth dropped open. “What? You think my personal fantasy is to be engaged to you? Are you nuts?”
“I know it’s hard for you to admit,” Phil continued. And then he couldn’t keep a straight face any longer and broke into laughter. He put his fingertip under my chin. “If you could see your face right now.”
“Argh. I did it to keep the guys off my back. Karen had this job first and warned me I was going to get hit on constantly.”
Phil didn’t seem to find this as amusing. “Yeah, Cho figured it was something like that. So, did it work?”
I nodded. “Really well, actually. I told them you were trained in mixed martial arts.” I gave his body a onceover. He looked fine, but he had lost a little weight on the road. “And insanely jealous. That part was no lie.”
“Kelly Tanaka, professional liar. Never thought I’d see the day.”
“I’m not very good at it,” I confessed. “A career as a spy is out for me.”
“What are you doing at that job anyway?” Phil wondered.
“It was the only job I could get in sports media.” I was getting tired of explaining this. “I’m not an in-demand engineering grad like you. And you never answered me, how come you’re here? I thought you were supposed to be backpacking around Asia?”
“I got an e-mail while I was on the road. My engineering firm got the big project they were bidding on, and now it’s all hands on deck.”
“When are you heading back to Calgary?”
“Well, we’re based in Calgary, but this project is actually here. With the Olympics coming up, this city is buzzing, and there’s a ton of construction happening.”
“So, you’re going to be living here?” I swallowed. This week seemed to be getting even more intense. In four days, both Phil and Jimmy were both going to be in the same city as me—and each other.
“Yes, isn’t that convenient? We can act like we’re engaged—day and night.” Phil gave me a little eye-fuck to show exactly what he meant by that remark.
“Um, actually, I was planning on telling everyone the truth today. That I’m single.”
“Well, you don’t have to do that anymore.” Phil yawned. “Sorry, I’m still jetlagged.”
“How was your trip?”
“Fantastic. I had to cut it a little short of what we had planned, but I got a fair amount of travelling in already. I really liked Bali. And Japan—you should go to Japan, Kelly.”
I nodded. It was something my dad had suggested a few times, but our family weren’t really big travellers.
“Who’s we?” Maybe I was reading him wrong, and he had a girlfriend. I was pretty sure I had heard that news in the winter.
“I went with some buddies from Calgary.”
Buddies could be women too, but it didn’t sound like some romantic trip for two.
Our lunch arrived, and he continued to tell me about his trip.
“My last stop was Thailand. It’s a beautiful place, but there’s a weird juxtaposition. In some areas, it’s so shitty. You feel like every kind of perversion is for sale. But other regions are an unspoiled paradise, and the Thai people are modest and spiritual.”
“You’re so philosophical. Most guys go there to party on the beach.”
“Well, we did our share of beach parties. Some places, you could still see the effects of the tsunami too—new buildings and construction. Being on a beautiful beach with the moon lighting up the white sand, it was amazing.” He looked up at me. “What are you smiling about?”
“I don’t know. When you get all excited about stuff, it’s cute. It reminds me of when we were kids and you’d convince me to partake in some crazy adventure.”
He chuckled. “They all turned out, didn’t they?”
“Oh sure. I think I still have scars on my knee from that mountain bike obstacle course thing.”
“Hey, I also piggy-backed you home and bandaged up your legs that day.”
“Was that out of friendship, or worry that my mom would kill you?”
“Maybe I just wanted to play doctor.” Phil’s voice was slightly hoarse as he shifted gears. “I take it that the fact you had to pretend you have a boyfriend means you don’t actually have a boyfriend.”
“Ummm,” I replied smoothly. Was I dating Jimmy now? I hadn’t agreed to that yet, but I was sure that he would consider we had some kind of commitment. Still, I didn’t want to spoil this lunch.
“You know, Kelly, this is how I always hoped things would be. You and me, together in the same city after we graduated. I think we’ve both changed since high school, but it’s our chance to see how we work. It’s real life now. We’re not kids anymore.” He focused on my face and smiled. “I’m already feeling very good about this.”
Suddenly it occurred to me that Phil was the missing piece. It wasn’t that I didn’t care about Jimmy, but more that I felt that I couldn’t decide for some reason. Now that Phil was here, all the puzzle pieces were finally in the box.
“Was this the ring I gave you?” He took my hand in his and examined my cubic zirconia more closely. “If it was a real diamond, it would be worth a lot. But not the setting I would have chosen for you.”
“Really? Maybe a puzzle ring?”
“No, I would have gotten something more modern, a plain gold setting, with a solitaire.” Weirdly, it sounded like this was something he had thought about. “So, what else did you tell them about your wonderful fiancé?”
“Ha. Well, they could see your photo, so they knew you were tall, dark and—” I paused; I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction. “Not a total beast.”
Phil laughed. “So Kelly, you want to go out for dinner tonight? And I could use a date to my parent’s big anniversary shindig on the weekend. I think you owe me big for being your fake fiancé.”
“I owe you? You didn’t have to do a thing.”
“My photo is on your desk, and my reputation is on the line. Now everyone in Vancouver thinks I’m the marrying kind of guy. From now on, my first dates will be littered with wedding magazines and china patterns. I’m doomed!”
I started giggling, yet inside I felt uneasy. Being with Phil again was so much fun. But when I saw Jimmy, he had stirred a lot of warm feelings in me. How could I be attracted to both of them at the same time? And what was I going to do?
When I returned to the office, things were back to normal. Brian came by to talk to me after his show ended.
“Uh, big oops, Kelly. So you really do have a fiancé, even if he is a cheap bastard. You should have held out for a real diamond at least. Did he tell you it was a fake?”
I found it
deeply ironic that now that I was ready to tell the truth, nobody was going to believe me. Given that I was interested in dating again, it was time to be single. However, it would be too mind-boggling to explain that I was dating my ex-fiancé.
I dropped into Cheryl’s office. Her desk was perfectly clean now, and she beamed at me.
“Did you and Phil have a nice lunch?”
“Er, yes, great.”
“What an adorable couple you are.”
“Well, about that, I have to tell you—I’m not really engaged.”
She gave me a blank stare, and then her eyebrows knotted in concern. “Oh Kelly, I’m so sorry. He broke up with you? And on your lunch hour, that’s rather heartless. Did you want to take the rest of the day off?” She reached out to pat my hand.
“No, no, that’s not it at all.” I took a deep breath. “Okay, this started way back. Remember my friend, Karen? She warned me that the guys were really a pain here, and we decided that if I pretended to be engaged it would make things easier.”
Cheryl looked at me with one eye closed. “I have to admit, that’s rather clever. It did seem to work. So why are you confessing this now? Phil seemed fine with the deception—rather happy, actually.”
This was even harder to explain. “Well, I’m sick of lying about it. And now I think I’d like to start actually dating and not have to worry about running into anyone from work.”
She nodded. “I think I understand. Dating someone other than Phil.”
“Sort of. I’ll probably be dating Phil. But, um, other people too.”
Cheryl frowned at me. “You young people have more complicated lives than I ever did. But your personal life isn’t really our business. As long as you continue to do a good job here, that’ll be fine.”
Complicated? She had no idea. Unfortunately, neither did I.
11
The Dating Game
“You know, I’ve never been a big believer in fate,” I told April. “But I think that all the craziness in the past week has occurred for a reason.”
Hockey Is My Boyfriend: Part Three Page 6
