by R. L. Stine
Mmmmm. Rubbery goodness.
The man flung the car door open. “No!” he cried. “Don’t hurt me! L-leave me alone!”
He ran away to hide somewhere. It was nice of him to leave me his car.
I ripped the door off the car. I pulled the handle off and stuffed it into my mouth.
Delicious. Nice cool chrome.
Then I took a big bite out of the door. Chomp, chomp. My teeth were huge and sharp as a razor—they had no trouble chewing the metal. Yum—leather upholstery for extra flavor. I finished off the door and reached in to rip out a bucket seat.
Bits of yellow foam rubber spewed out of my mouth as I ate. The leather was yummy. But the foam padding was kind of dry. It was like air-popped popcorn with no butter. Bleh.
I was tearing out the steering wheel when I heard sirens.
Uh-oh.
I saw that a mob had gathered around me. People pointed at me.
“It’s eating a car!” someone screeched.
Well, duhhh, I thought. What do you expect a monster to eat—Rice Krispies?
The sirens came closer. Police cars were pulling up all around me.
“Clear the way,” came a voice over a loudspeaker. “Stand back. Clear the way.”
I’d better get out of here, I decided. I dropped the steering wheel I was nibbling and began to run. People screamed and scattered out of the way.
“Stop it! Get the monster!”
The squeal of police sirens ripped through the air. If they caught me, I knew they’d try to lock me up—or worse.
I had to get out of there. I had to hide.
I stumbled through the crowds. I headed for the edge of town.
Then I spotted her. Lacie. Mobs of people were running away from me. She was the only one running toward me.
I snarled, trying to call Lacie. She grabbed me by my slimy arm and pulled me out of the crowd.
She led me down an alley. We lost the mob. I wanted to ask her where we were going. But I knew the words wouldn’t come. I was afraid a roar might scare her.
We ran and ran. We didn’t stop running until we reached the woods at the edge of town. Lacie pulled me into the woods, deeper and deeper.
She’s hiding me, I thought gratefully. I wished I could thank her.
I followed Lacie down a narrow path. Then the path ended. We pushed our way through the brush.
At last we came to a small house. It was well hidden by trees and vines. You could hardly see it, even when you stood right in front of it.
A hideout, I thought. How did Lacie find this place?
I wondered if there was anything good to eat inside the house. I was getting hungry again.
A couple of bicycles would taste good right now, I thought.
Lacie opened the door of the house. She beckoned me to come inside.
I went in. Two people stepped out of the shadows.
No. Oh, no.
Not them.
But it was them.
The guys in black.
One of them spoke.
“Thank you for bringing him to us,” he said. “You did your job well.”
19
RRRROOOOOOAAAAARRRR!
I thrashed my arms. I was furious!
Lacie betrayed me!
I had to get out of there—fast.
I dove for the door—but they dropped a net over me.
They yanked on the net—and I tripped.
I fell with a heavy thud. The two guys closed the net over me.
I roared and thrashed with all my might. But I couldn’t get out. They tied the net tightly around me.
“Get me out of here!” I wanted to scream. I slashed at the net with my claws. I bit it with my teeth. But it was made of some kind of strange material. I couldn’t break the strings.
I snarled and kicked for a long time. But no matter what I did, I was still trapped. At last I got tired. I lay on my back on the floor.
Lacie and the two guys in black stared down at me, perfectly calm.
I wished I could talk. I couldn’t stop myself from trying.
“How could you do this to me?” I tried to ask Lacie. “I thought you were my friend!”
Nothing but snarls and growls came out of me. Lacie stared down at me. She couldn’t understand what I said.
The guys in black just folded their arms across their chests and sneered at me.
“Who are you?” I wanted to ask them. “What do you want? What is happening to me?”
No one answered me. One of the guys, the taller one, said, “All right. Let’s lock him up in the back.”
I roared again. I struggled as the three of them dragged my big, slimy body across the floor. They pushed me into a small room at the back of the house. They locked me inside.
The room was dark. There was one small window with metal bars on it.
I could eat those bars, I realized. If I could reach them.
But I was stuck on the floor. I couldn’t move inside the tight net.
I lay still for a long time, waiting for something to happen. But no one returned to the room. I couldn’t hear what they were doing in the other rooms.
Through the window I saw the light fading. Night was coming.
I knew there was nothing I could do but fall asleep—fall asleep and hope I’d wake up human again.
20
I woke up groggy. My stomach hurt.
Man, I thought. What did I eat yesterday? It feels as if I’ve got a big lump of metal in my stomach!
Then I remembered. I did have metal in my stomach.
Oh, yeah. I had snacked on a compact car. Mom always told me not to eat too many snacks.
I’ve got to remember not to do that again.
I sat up. I checked myself out.
Whew. I was human again.
What a relief.
The net lay open around me. Someone had cut it off while I was sleeping.
But who was I now?
My arms and legs were skinny. My feet were floppy and too big for my legs.
But they weren’t that big. Not monster big. I was a boy again. But not my usual twelve-year-old self.
I figured I was about fourteen.
Well, I thought, it’s better than being a monster.
A lot better.
But I’m still in that house in the woods, I realized. I’m still a prisoner.
Those two guys in black had finally caught me.
What did they want? What were they going to do to me?
I stood up and tried the door. Locked.
I glanced at the window. There was no way I could break through those bars.
I was trapped.
I heard a key in the lock. They were coming!
I cowered in a corner of the room.
The door swung open. Lacie and the two guys stepped in.
“Matt?” Lacie said. She spotted me in the corner. She took a step toward me.
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked.
It was good to hear words coming out of my mouth again. Instead of just roars.
“Let me go!” I cried.
The guys in black shook their heads.
“We can’t do that,” the shorter guy said. “We can’t let you go.”
They stepped closer. They balled their hands into fists.
“No!” I shouted. “Stay away from me!”
The tall guy slammed the door shut. Then they moved in on me.
21
They walked steadily toward me. I glanced frantically around the room for a way to escape.
The guys blocked my path to the door. There was no way out.
“We’re not going to hurt you, Matt,” Lacie said gently. “We want to help you. Really.”
The guys took another step toward me. I shrank back. They sure didn’t look like they wanted to help me.
“Don’t be afraid, Matt,” Lacie said. “We need to talk to you.”
She sat down in front of me. She was trying to show me I shouldn’t be a
fraid.
But the two guys stood guard on either side of her.
“Tell me what’s happening to me,” I demanded.
Lacie cleared her throat. “You’re trapped in a Reality Warp,” she explained.
As if I’d know what she was talking about.
“Oh, of course. A Reality Warp,” I cracked. “I knew something weird was going on.”
“Cut the comedy,” the shorter guy snarled. “This is no joke. You’re causing us a lot of trouble.”
Lacie hushed him. “Quiet, Wayne. I’ll handle this.”
She turned back to me and asked in her soft voice, “You don’t know what a Reality Warp is, do you?”
“No,” I replied. “But I know I don’t like it.”
“When you fell asleep in your guest room, you fell into a hole in reality,” she said.
The more she told me, the less it made sense. “There’s a hole in reality—in the guest room?”
She nodded. “You fell asleep in one reality, and woke up in another. You’ve been stuck in that hole ever since. Now, whenever you go to sleep, you change what is real and what isn’t real.”
“Well, make it stop!” I demanded.
“I’ll stop you,” the tall guy threatened.
“Bruce—please,” Lacie snapped.
“What does all this have to do with you, anyway?” I asked.
“You’re breaking the law, Matt,” she said. “Every time you change, you break the laws of reality.”
“I’m not doing it on purpose!” I protested. “I never even heard of the laws of reality! I’m innocent!”
Lacie tried to soothe me. “I know you’re not doing it on purpose. But it doesn’t matter. It’s happening. When you change bodies, you change what is real and what isn’t real for a lot of people. If you keep changing, you’ll throw the whole world into confusion.”
“You don’t understand!” I cried. “I want to stop it! I’ll do anything to stop it! I just want to be normal again!”
“Don’t worry,” Wayne murmured. “We’re going to stop it.”
“We’re the Reality Police,” Lacie told me. “Our job is to keep reality under control. We’ve been trying to keep up with you, Matt. It hasn’t been easy, with all the changes you’ve made.”
“But why?” I asked. “What are you going to do?”
“We had to capture you,” Lacie said. “We can’t allow you to break the reality laws.”
I thought quickly. “It’s the guest room, right? This all happened because I slept in the guest room?”
“Well—”
“I’ll never sleep in the guest room again!” I promised. “I don’t mind if I don’t change back to my old self. This skinny fourteen-year-old body is not so bad.”
Lacie shook her head. “It’s too late for that, Matt. You’re trapped in the hole. It doesn’t matter whether you sleep in the guest room or not. Every time you go to sleep—and wake up—you change reality. No matter where you are.”
“You mean—I can never fall asleep again?”
“That’s not quite it.” Lacie glanced at the two guys. Then she trained her blue eyes on me.
“I’m sorry, Matt. I really am. You seem like a nice guy.”
An icy chill slithered down my spine. “What—what are you talking about?”
She patted my hand. “We have no choice, Matt. We have to put you to sleep—forever.”
22
I stared at her in horror.
“You—you can’t do that!” I stammered.
“Oh, yes, we can,” Wayne said.
“And we will,” Bruce added.
“No!” I shouted. I leaped to my feet and dove for the door. But Bruce and Wayne were ready for me. They grabbed me and held my arms behind my back.
“You’re not going anywhere, kid,” Wayne said.
“Let go of me!” I screamed.
I struggled and squirmed. But I wasn’t a gigantic monster anymore. I was a scrawny kid—no match for Bruce and Wayne. Even Lacie probably could have beaten me up if she wanted to.
The guys tossed me against the back wall of the room.
“We’ll be back later,” Lacie promised. “Try not to worry about it too much, Matt. It won’t hurt.”
They left the room. I heard the key turn in the lock.
I was trapped again.
I searched the room for a way to escape. It was completely empty—no furniture at all, not even a chair. Just four bare walls, a locked door, and a small window with metal bars.
I opened the window and rattled the bars. I hoped they might be loose or something. But they didn’t budge.
It was like being in jail. Jailed by the Reality Police.
I put my ear to the door, listening. I could hear Lacie, Bruce, and Wayne talking in the other room.
“He’ll have to drink the sleeping potion,” Wayne said. “Make sure he drinks the whole cup—or he might wake up.”
“But what if he spits it out?” Lacie asked. “What if he doesn’t swallow it?”
“I’ll make him swallow it,” Bruce vowed.
Yikes! I couldn’t listen anymore. I frantically paced the room.
They were going to feed me a sleeping potion! To make me sleep forever!
I’d been in trouble before. My day in high school had seemed scary at the time. Being a monster was scary too. But, now—now I was really done for.
I’ve got to find a way out of this mess! I told myself. But how? How?
Then it dawned on me. How did I get out of trouble before?
I fell asleep. And the problem went away.
True, I always woke up with new, worse problems. But nothing could be worse than this!
Maybe, I hoped, if I fall asleep, I’ll wake up somewhere else. And that’s how I can escape!
I paced some more.
The only trouble was—how could I fall asleep? I was so terrified!
I knew I had to try, anyway. So I lay down on the floor. There was no bed, no pillow, no blanket. Daylight streamed in through the barred window.
Falling asleep wasn’t going to be easy.
You can do it, I told myself. I remembered how my mom—my real mom—used to say I could fall asleep in a hurricane. I’m a good sleeper, it’s true.
I missed my mom. It seemed like I hadn’t seen her in a long, long time.
If only there were some way I could bring her back, I thought as I closed my eyes.
When I was very little, she used to sing me to sleep. I remembered the lullaby she sang. It was all about pretty ponies….
I hummed the song to myself. Before I knew it, I drifted off to sleep.
23
I opened my eyes. I rubbed them. Had I fallen asleep?
Yes.
Where was I?
I looked up. Plain ceiling.
I looked around. Bare walls.
A door.
A window. With bars on it.
“No!” I cried, furious. “No!”
I was still in the same room, in the same house in the woods.
I was still a prisoner.
My plan didn’t work.
Now what could I do?
“Nooooooo!”
I was so angry, so frustrated, so scared, I jumped up and down in a rage.
My plan hadn’t worked. I had no more ideas. I didn’t know what to do.
Now I knew for sure there was no escape for me.
I was doomed.
I heard Lacie and the two guys in the other room. They were getting the sleeping potion ready.
They’d put me to sleep forever. I’d never see my mother, or Greg, or Pam again.
How could they do this to me? It wasn’t fair!
I didn’t do anything wrong. Not on purpose, anyway!
Thinking about all this made me angrier and angrier. I screamed, “NOOOOOOOOOOO!”
And it sounded strange to me.
I screamed again, not so loud this time.
“Nooooo!”
I thought I was
saying, “No.” But that’s not what I heard.
I heard a squeak.
“No!” I said again.
“Eee!” I heard.
It was my voice. But it wasn’t a human voice.
I looked at myself. I’d forgotten to do that. I’d been so terrified to find myself still trapped—I didn’t think that maybe I had changed.
But I had changed.
I was small. About eight inches tall.
I had tiny little paws. Gray fur. A big bushy tail.
I was a squirrel!
My eyes went to the window. I could easily squeeze through the bars now.
I didn’t waste a second. I scampered up the wall and wriggled through the bars.
I was free!
Yippee! I did a little squirrel somersault to celebrate.
Then I ran through the woods as fast as I could. I found the path to town.
I scurried through town on my little squirrel feet. It seemed to take a long time. Short distances felt longer to me.
All was quiet in town. Normal. No sign that a monster had ever stomped through, chomping on cars.
I guess that reality disappeared, I thought.
This is the new reality. I’m a squirrel.
But at least I’m an awake squirrel. It’s better than being a boy who has to sleep forever.
I sniffed the air. I had an amazing sense of smell. I thought I could smell my house from the middle of town.
I raced across the street. But I forgot what my mother always told me.
Look both ways before you cross.
A car peeled around the corner. The driver couldn’t see me.
Huge black tires bore down on me. I tried to scurry out of the way.
But I didn’t have time.
I shut my eyes. Is this how I’ll end up? I wondered.
As roadkill?
24
SCREECH!
The driver slammed on the brakes. The car squealed to a stop.
Then everything was quiet.
I opened my eyes. One tire came so close, it touched my ear.
I zipped out from under the tire and across the street. The car sped away.
I reached the sidewalk. A dog stood guard in a yard. He barked at me.
Whoops! I dodged him and ran up a tree. The dog chased me, barking furiously.
