Redirected aggression typically happens when a sudden stimulus either surprises a cat into action, or that sudden stimulus happens in the midst of a simmering, stressful situation. An example: two of your cats are sitting side by side in a window, just watching the day go by. Suddenly, a community cat who was hidden from sight pops into view. At that moment, the Raw Cat comes screaming to the forefront, fight or flight, live or die. The house cat ceases to make decisions; his body, his finely honed Raw Cat instincts, take over. He wants to get at the target, but the target is inaccessible. So that fight-or-flight energy gets taken out on whoever is nearby. In this case, it’s your other cat.
Key Points:
If you feel like it could be a case of redirected aggression due to outside cats, see “When Outside Cats Cause Trouble for Inside Cats” (chapter 18), while applying Recipe No. 2 from the beginning of this chapter.
No matter the root cause, the major problem is that if the relationship is damaged in that moment, it can be permanently damaged unless you take immediate action. In fact, one of the most difficult cases I’ve ever worked was exactly the above redirected scenario—and the participants were seven-year-old littermates!I’m sure you can relate: Imagine you’re sitting at dinner with your significant other or a family member. The smoke alarm gets triggered by said dinner, and whomever you imagined in this scenario then attacks you, punching you in the face repeatedly. Let’s face it, you are going to have some significant trust issues moving forward, because there’s something inside you that has decided you just don’t know who that person is anymore.
All of this is to say: don’t underestimate the damage done to a relationship in moments. It goes a long way toward understanding that using this recipe involves threading a tricky needle—reintroducing and building positive associations as if they had never met.
4) I Hate Your Face: When Cats Just Refuse to Coexist
The Problem: No matter what you do, you can’t get your cats to get along.
The Reality: Some cats will never accept an intruder into their territory, and some personalities will never mesh. I have worked with so many multiple-cat homes where we did everything to make positive associations between the two animals. But no matter what, as soon as they had access to one another, they were at it, rolling around on the ground, Tasmanian devil–style, fur flying, someone peeing on himself, sometimes headed for the hospital. In this case, it must be acknowledged that a cat can look at another cat and just say, “I hate your face.”
It’s important for us to try to equate their experiences to our own to better understand the crossroads at which everyone stands. Think about that college roommate, or the work associate you had to share an office with. You just couldn’t put your finger on it—the roommate paid his bills on time and cleaned up the kitchen; the work associate never left early, saddling you with his or her workload. But there was something about the way they laughed, or ate their food—you just couldn’t stand them. You hated their face and HAD to get away from them. The difference between us and our cats? We could make that choice to move out or change offices. Our cats can’t.
Key Points:
Nobody likes talking about rehoming a cat . . . me as little as anybody else. But I also want to make sure that we’re keeping their needs on par with ours. When is that time to start thinking about rehoming? When there are constant fights and you have been trying to reintroduce the cats for months and months? Quite possibly. But first . . .
The Site-Swap Solution: If you are okay with that site-swapping arrangement you’ve implemented during the bulk of any reintroduction process, and can manage your own expectations to accept that it may never work out, and you understand that you may be living in a system of gates and doors (which many people have done successfully)—well, then, that’s the way that you can keep the cats together in the home. Otherwise, it’s time to switch your frame of reference from guardian to foster parent, and start finding what you consider to be the perfect home for one of these cats.
I’M NOT SAYING, by any stretch of the imagination, that we should jump to conclusions or rush to judgment. Options need to be exhausted before taking action or even getting into that ultimate conversation about rehoming a cat (there are some more ideas and tools below). In the course of my long history working with cats and their relationships, it’s cases like these that I dread the most, where my ego can so easily take control—my desire and determination to make this square cat fit into the round hole. My ultimate job, remember, is to act as cat ambassador first and foremost. If one or both of the cats in a scenario like this says to me, “Jackson, I hate that guy’s face,” despite all of the negotiations and positive association building . . . that exclamation has got to be respected. Now you might be reading this, shaking your head and saying that no matter what, you would never rehome a family member. Believe me, I get it. But that family member also needs a say.
“NOTHING IS WORKING!”—A FEW MORE THINGS TO TRY
You’ve gone through the full Introduction (or Reintroduction) process and it’s still looking like WWIII between your feuding felines. Before you decide it’s a match made in hell, consider the following:
Reintroduction Reflection: So you’ve gone through the Introduction process at least once, right? Before drawing conclusions, take a critical eye to your own process, looking for signs of “skipping or skimping.” Did you follow the steps to the letter, or did you “improvise” here and there? Did you decide that a certain step didn’t apply to your cat or your particular situation? Did you get frustrated at the glacial pace of success and gloss over the finer details? Sound familiar? If so, considering what’s at stake with the outcome of this process, take another shot at a thorough reintroduction. Make sure that you are setting concrete goals for each step, and that you’re not moving ahead until that goal is met. Also, be sure to take note of exactly where it all broke down last time, so you can give those phases of the process extra attention this time.
Catification Reflection: Another place in the process that tends toward skipping and skimping is Catification. Catifying, if done in a thoughtful and complete way, will almost always bring down the territorial tension in the home, since what you are doing is creating more resources. Competition over these resources, as well as plain old square footage, will no doubt be dampened when there’s more than enough of it to go around.
Behavioral Medication: This could be a book unto itself. As such, there are certain things I’d like you to consider. I don’t recommend this step lightly, and when I do, it is first and foremost to alleviate suffering in the cat we are considering it for. I’ve also recommended it in certain cat-on-cat situations, where both parties could benefit from a short-term course in order to get them to adjust their frame of reference and release either their aggressive or extremely fearful responses to normal stimuli. There is no black-and-white in this part of our world. I consider behavioral meds incredibly effective, but they are by no means magic. I also just as readily recommend natural solutions (I have, for years, made my own brand of flower essence remedies), or modalities like acupuncture or cranial-sacral work. In conjunction with the techniques I’ve laid out, the meds can really help break through deep-seated problems and help forge a solution.
One thing you will never see me do is recommend a lifetime of medication for a cat who doesn’t personally need it in order to relieve suffering. If we have to rely on meds just so two cats can tolerate one another, then, in my opinion, we’ve gone too far.
Also, you will obviously want to consult with your vet to see if one or both of your warring felines are candidates, and if they are physically okay enough to handle the medication. Please, though—do not let your vet, or me, or any one person make this decision for your cat and you. Do your due diligence on this matter. Research it fully, ask why one medication was prescribed over another, etc. The truth is that advances are being made every day when it comes to medic
al assistance with animal behavior, and one professional may not have the same level of expertise as the next. The only way for you to feel good about a decision like this one? Be your own expert and your cat’s advocate. Research the behavior AND the medical options so that you can ask the right questions and make the right move.
15
When Your Cat Is Biting or Scratching Humans
BLOODLETTING, IN THE course of your life together with a cat or cats, happens. Most of the time, it happens by accident—a scratch during play, toes that move under the blanket, a swipe at an insect that misses its target. Of course, there are times when cat-on-human aggression is not so innocent—but in either case, it’s not your skin that pays the ultimate price. If the context of the aggression is not properly identified and approached, your relationship takes the biggest hit. Hurt feelings leave a bigger scar than a bite or scratch. Let’s nip that one in the bud!
CAT DADDY RECIPE NO. 3—
TAKING THE EDGE OFF
The Problem:
You or a loved one have been feeling the wrath of claws, teeth, or both, and probably have the war wounds to show for it. You’ve even started to distance yourself from your cat as friends and family have started calling him names like the cat from hell (my bad, sorry). His actions could best be described as “out of the blue,” “unpredictable,” or “random,” and something must be done about this before your relationship—and the trust that goes with it—completely comes undone.
The Reality:
As we’ve discussed, cats don’t “attack” without a reason, even if that reason is apparent to nobody but them. Whether it’s due to play aggression, redirected aggression, overstimulation, chemical or territorial fear, anxiety, or pain, we have to quickly assess the issue as we take a step-by-step run through this recipe.
The Steps:
Rule Out the Medical: If you feel that your cat’s aggression could be stemming from a physical ailment (for example, when she suddenly bites or scratches when she’s picked up a certain way), a vet exam should be part of your immediate future. Also, if the aggressiveness seems especially random or irrational (a judgment to be made after your detective work in item 4), there could be a chemical imbalance or other neurological issue that should be addressed with a medical professional as well.
Ascertain Your Cat’s Natural Body Rhythm (a.k.a. circadian rhythm): Detectivist homework no. 1: Chronicle each attack, including what time they happen. If they’re demonstrating aggression first thing in the morning when you wake up, or later in the day when you come home from work—these are considered high energy times of the day (see more about Detectivism in step 4). And the good news is, it tells you that your cat’s body clock is synced up with yours: he’s sleeping at night, and that’s a natural body rhythm you can work with. If not, don’t despair—you can get him there. (This gets back to the Three Rs we’ve been talking about—see chapter 7.)
Play, in the world of a cat, is not a luxury—it’s a necessity: If you have a dog, and you don’t have a leash and a collar, people are going to call you crazy. Because if you don’t walk dogs every day, if you don’t fulfill that innate need they have, then undesirable things will happen. That energy must go somewhere. Now replace the word “dog” with “cat,” and the words “leash and collar” with “interactive toys.” That’s how strongly I feel about cats and play. The one thing that I can tell you is that if you commit not only to playing every day (that’s a given), but investing in the play and draining hunter energy out of your cat during play, you’re going to be thwarting a tremendous amount of bad behavior—not just play aggression. It goes far beyond that. But, hey, nobody wants to bleed, and this is a great way of making that stop. Your work in step 1 informs your work here: if you ascertain a time pattern to the aggression, step that time back by thirty minutes and institute your HCKE ritual.
Cat Detectivism: One of the reasons I have all my clients create a very detailed journal is to remove yourself from the story line and just write about actions, timing, and patterns that you start to notice in your cat’s behavior. Once you look at the information you’ve gathered, it’s a good bet that if your cat is engaging in play aggression, he’s probably doing it around the same time every day. So if that’s the case, then you have the capability to be proactive. It means that if you take a look at your journal and say, “I get up for work at six a.m. and I’m out the door by eight a.m. In between those times is when my ankles get attacked,” then—well, I know you’re not going to want to hear this because you’ve got lots to do in the morning, but that means that playing with your cat for at least a couple of minutes is really important in the morning. The key is not to wait for the behavior. Be proactive!
It’s not just about the when—it’s about the where: Use your Mojo Map! Aggression that happens by windows indicates that you might have outdoor cats triggering aggressive behavior in your indoor cats, and that could be causing a form of redirected aggression. See “Barbarians at the Gate” in chapter 18 for some solutions.If your cat tends to do that ankle attack from under a table, that tells you you’ve got a bush dweller; that’s where he gains his hunting mojo. If that’s the case, then play with him under the table. Use your feather toy and start bringing it to that floor level; commit to ground prey instead of just flying the bird in the air. Hunting-wise, he’d probably be more inclined—at least when it comes to starting that hunter motor—to start on the ground.
Your Part in the Pain: There are those times when we are just asking for it. Here are a few of these times:
Roughhousing: When it comes to roughhousing, it is a big mistake to assume that cats enjoy play in the same way that dogs do. Remember, cats are prey players, and fun for them is hunting, catching, killing, and eating—not the kind of rough interaction that dogs might enjoy more. Yes, cats respond to the stimulus of roughhousing, but not in the way that you might expect, especially if you’re used to playing roughly with dogs. With cats, it will likely trigger defensiveness and fear, or at the very least dangerous play like the on-their-back, all-four-paw wraparound. And you definitely won’t like the way that feels.
Overstimulation: This is a form of aggression that is typically induced by either petting a certain way and/or for a certain duration of time. This is another one that’s “on you” if it happens. See chapter 11 for more info.
“Putting your hands in the blender”: It is ill advised to use your hands to break up a fight, or try to comfort, pick up, or move a cat who is clearly upset. Instead, try to guide them to a quiet location for a time-out. (For more on time-outs, see page 136.)
Keep those nails trimmed: A little trimming can go a long way, should you happen to encounter the “Scissorhands” in passing or otherwise.
Hands Are Not Toys
If you already have a cat who has learned that hands are toys, he’s probably also become very sensitive to hands approaching him. There are ways to change that reaction.
1. Teach your cat that hands are only used gently by being aware about when you bring your hands to your cat. If you approach your cat with your hands during a time when she is already in a hyped-up state, then you’re asking for it. Only approach your cat for petting when there’s a sleepy late-night vibe, as opposed to when she is ramped up and ready to play.
2. If your cat is now hand-shy (meaning that every time your hands come to her, she shrinks away), then you’ll want to approach slowly, build positive associations by holding treats, and come at her from a low angle, as opposed to above her head.
When we humans are afraid of cats, we try to pet them by taking our hands and gingerly going over the top of their head. That is an invitation for disaster with a fight-or-flight animal because it could be perceived as a threat. Again, try to approach your cat with your hands from a low position and, if possible, use the Michelangelo technique (see chapter 11, pages 232–33).
When you’re trying to recondit
ion this behavior, everyone in your home must buy in. If everyone is adhering to the exercises and rules we’ve laid out here except for one person, who is still roughhousing and using hand-play, it will undo everyone else’s hard work. Just as with any exercise we present in this book, consistency and group buy-in from the humans are key.
The Mojo Moment:
More than anything, our Mojo Moment includes randomness being replaced by predictability. Understanding your cat is the first step toward helping him. Helping him means that your relationship is back on track. You can now predict his rhythms and head off any aggressive behavior at the pass, and if the problem was physical in nature, your cat is definitely feeling better—and that’s a huge bonus.
Notes from the Chef
Stay Calm and Carry On: If and when your cat might exhibit some aggression, don’t have a big reaction—such as screaming, yelling, or pushing your cat—as this will escalate things. This can also explain why cats may prey more on certain people in the home; they tend to “pick on” those who are fearful and have a huge reaction to their bites and scratches.
Avoid Being a Threat: Cats will bite when cornered or threatened. This may be circumstantial, or it may be because you have a Wallflower.
A House of Plenty: Keep a Napoleon at bay by making sure your home has plenty of vertical space, scent soakers, and signposts.
Stranger Danger: Help your cat have good associations with visitors. See “Getting Comfortable with Visitors,” page 327.
Total Cat Mojo Page 28
