“I wish I could dream about some broad,” he said. “I keep dreaming about Iraq. Every time I close my eyes, I’m back there.” He was still staring at the group, but his gaze seemed to turn inward. “I can’t turn it off. It haunts me. All of it. Then I wake up feeling the pain.” He glanced at Mitch. “My arm got burned off. It all comes back to me. Every second.”
Mitch swallowed. “I’m sorry, man,” he said.
“Yeah? Me, too.”
Mitch waited for Burt to say something, to help, but the old man was silent. Finally the one who looked like he was barely eighteen said, “You try sleeping with a dog?”
They all looked at him. Even Burt seemed startled.
“Cliff, there are some things we don’t need to know,” a guy said.
The kid flushed. “Not like that. I mean get a dog. I got one from a shelter. A mutt. He’s happy as hell and sometimes that bugs me, you know? But he’s always there. Always ready to listen or play. He takes me out of myself. I’m saying a dog can help. They curl up next to you at night.” He shrugged.
One guy mentioned tai chi as a way to deal with the pain. Another talked about the energy work Mitch was already doing. Nobody said he should get drunk and forget about it. Nobody assumed it would fix itself.
Over the next hour, problems were presented and solutions offered. A few men just wanted to talk, which Mitch couldn’t understand, but maybe time would change that. When the session was over, he found Joss outside.
“What’d you think?” Joss asked. “You coming back?”
“Do I have a choice?”
“We all have choices. They’re not always good ones, but we have them.”
Mitch thought about the group, how they were all different but each understood the loss of a very real part of themselves.
“I’ll be back,” he said.
“Good.” Joss shoved a brochure in his hands.
“What’s this?”
“A crisis training seminar. You learn how to talk to people in trouble. It’s a six-month course. At the end you’re not a therapist, but you’re somebody who knows how to listen.”
Mitch dropped the brochure as if it were a live grenade. “What are you talking about? I can’t help anyone else.”
Joss stared at him. “That’s where you’re wrong. You’re exactly the right person for someone in crisis to lean on. It’s not easy and there are plenty who can’t be saved, but when you pull someone back from the brink, when you see him build up his life again, it’s a good day. Don’t you want a few good days?”
Mitch looked from Joss to the brochure, then bent over and picked it up. “I didn’t talk today,” he said. “I don’t want to talk. What makes you think I want to listen?”
“I have a gut instinct about these things.” Joss grinned. “It’s part of my charm. Just ask my wife.”
“I’ll pass.”
Joss patted the brochure. “Think about it. The next class starts in a couple of months. By then they won’t be able to shut you up in group.”
“That will never happen.”
“I know, but it’s fun to think about. You’ve got someone to watch your back, Mitch. There are plenty of guys who don’t have anyone. That’s not right and it’s something we can change—one vet at a time.”
Joss walked back to the physical therapy center. Mitch made his way to his truck. He climbed in and put the brochure on the seat next to him.
Could he help someone in crisis? Did he want to? His first instinct was to call Skye and talk to her about it. Not that he would. She had enough going on.
Joss was right—someone had his back. Who had Skye’s? Who would protect her from Garth’s next move? Except it wasn’t a difficult question and he already knew the answer.
He would.
THAT NIGHT, after Erin was in bed, Skye went to see Jed in his study. Her father was laying low these days. No parties had been planned, which after the last one wasn’t much of a surprise. But he also hadn’t been coming to dinner or showing up at breakfast. He was either at the office or in his study at home.
She knocked on the partially open door. Jed barely looked up.
“What?” he asked.
“I need to talk to you.”
“This isn’t a good time.”
“T.J. was working for Garth.”
Jed straightened in his chair and motioned for her to come in. “Where’d you hear that nonsense?”
“I know it’s true. He was just one part of Garth’s assault plan. He came between me and Izzy, which was his goal. Divide and conquer.”
“You think Garth has a plan?”
“I’m sure he does. He’s working all of us. You, me, Lexi. Even Cruz has had some trouble. No one is safe.” Except Izzy, who was on the rig. “I’m sure T.J. isn’t the first spy he’s had.” She didn’t mention that Garth had approached Mitch. There was no point in distracting Jed.
“We need to have a family meeting,” she continued. “We need to come up with a plan of our own to stop him.”
Jed dismissed her with a flick of his fingers. “This isn’t your fight.”
“He’s made it mine. Somehow he got into the computer system at the foundation. He’s uploaded a second set of books that are completely false. But until I can prove that, we’re under scrutiny from the government. We’re at risk of losing our nonprofit status.”
“No one cares about that,” Jed said flatly. “You want to compare your silly foundation with the charges I’m fighting? I never understood why you’re wasting your time with all that.”
“Feeding hungry children? You consider that a waste? Oh, wait. Let me guess. These kids aren’t worth saving. Is that it?”
“You should put your resources into something that matters.”
“This matters to me.”
“Then you’re a fool. But fine. Keep your foundation. I’ll find someone else for you to marry. You need a husband and more kids. That will keep you busy.”
His total dismissal of who and what she was shouldn’t have been a surprise, yet it was.
“You don’t own me,” she said quietly. “You’re not picking out my next husband.”
“Of course I am. Don’t forget who you’re talking to, little girl. This is my house. Glory’s Gate is what you want and to win it, you have to play by my rules. Lexi played and lost the business. The same thing can happen to you.”
She didn’t know this man, she thought sadly. He was her father and she didn’t understand anything about him. She didn’t think he was deliberately cruel, but he was a bully.
“Does it occur to you that most fathers don’t have to play the fear card with their children? Why do you think you have to buy us?”
Jed stood. “Be careful, Skye. You don’t want to push me.”
“I will if I have to,” she said, and left.
On her way upstairs, she thought about how powerful her father was. He could be as ruthless as Garth. This might very well be a battle to the death and she had no idea who would win.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
MITCH KNEW he’d made a serious mistake by agreeing to come to Erin’s school and talk to the kids. He didn’t have anything to say and he didn’t want to scare them with his prosthesis. But Erin had insisted and apparently he couldn’t tell her no. So he found himself walking down the halls of Titanville Elementary, looking for the right classroom.
What he spotted instead was a group of adults talking quietly in a hallway. He joined them, figuring this had to be the right place. A pretty blond woman with a name badge that read Hi, I’m Monica came up to him.
“Hi. I’m one of the teacher’s aids.”
“You must be Monica.”
The woman frowned. “Have we met?”
He pointed to the badge.
“Oh, right. I forgot I was wearing it. Yes, that’s me. My son is in this class. You are here with?”
“Erin Titan.”
Monica’s blue eyes brightened. “Erin’s hero. It’s nice to finally meet yo
u.”
If he’d been sure of his balance, he would have shifted uncomfortably. “I’m not a hero.”
“Former SEAL?”
“Yeah.”
“Wounded in action?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Saved countless lives and you don’t want to talk about it.”
He shrugged. “Maybe.”
“You have fulfilled the hero description. I’m sorry, but you’re stuck with the title now. Come on. I’ll show you where to wait.” She led him to where the other adults stood and made a few introductions. Then she put her hand on his arm. “If you need anything, just let me know.”
Her smile was sincere, her eyes wide with invitation. He might have been out of the dating game for a while, but he recognized interest when it slapped him in the face.
He watched Monica walk away, his gaze slipping to her butt, then down her legs.
She was appealing, he thought, belatedly realizing she hadn’t been wearing a wedding band. He should probably take her up on her not-so-subtle come-on. They could go out. Get to know each other. Have sex.
All of which should have sounded really good…and it didn’t. He didn’t want blue eyes, he wanted green. A fiery redhead, not a blonde and the only fatherless kid he wanted in his life was Erin.
He swore silently. It had been nine years. Why couldn’t he get Skye out of his head? Why did she have to be the one who got to him?
The door to the classroom opened and Erin came out. She shrieked when she saw him.
“You’re here! You came.”
“Of course I came.”
She waved him into the room where they stood in back while a woman talked about how she rescued horses. A few minutes later, she finished and the kids applauded. Then Erin led him to the front of the room.
“This is Mitch Cassidy,” she said proudly. “He owns the ranch next door and he’s a real hero. He was a SEAL and fought in the war and protected our country and saved lots of lives.” She started to go to her seat, then stopped.
“Oh. He lost part of his leg and now he has a metal one and it’s really cool.”
Several of the kids leaned forward eagerly.
“Can we see it?” one boy asked.
The teacher, a tall middle-aged woman, hesitated. “I’m sure our guest doesn’t want to—”
“I don’t mind,” Mitch said, surprising himself and possibly the teacher. He drew up his jeans pant leg.
Several of the boys oohed while one girl covered her eyes.
“What happened?” a boy asked.
“I got in the way of an explosion. You don’t want to do that. The explosion always wins.”
“Did it hurt?”
“Before. Not now.”
“Does your fake leg come off?”
“How do you stand in the shower?”
“Can you run faster or slower?”
The teacher raised both her hands. “Okay. One question at a time.” She smiled at Mitch. “Unless you’d prefer to give your prepared talk.”
“Not really,” Mitch said. He had a few notes on what it was like to be a SEAL, but everything he’d written down had sounded stupid. Answering questions seemed easier.
“My leg comes off,” he said. “I don’t sleep with it. I don’t run as fast as I used to, but I’m getting better. I can ride and walk and do pretty much anything you can do.”
“What’s it like being a hero?” one girl asked.
Skye slipped into the back of the room. Mitch looked good standing up in front of the class. Maybe too good. Looking at him made it tough to think.
She watched the emotions chase across his face and knew he was debating the whole “hero” part of the question. He accepted that Erin called him that but wouldn’t think it of himself.
“I was doing a job,” he said. “Taking care of my responsibilities. That’s what people do—the right thing. Sometimes that meant being in danger.” He settled on the corner of the teacher’s desk. “Danger is a funny thing. It shows up when you don’t expect it, so you don’t have time to think. You act on instinct.”
Several of the kids frowned, as if confused.
He saw it, too. “You just act. You don’t have time for a plan. So you have to know what you’re going to do before the danger shows up. Can anyone here tell me when you practice for danger?”
There was silence. The students got wide-eyed and looked at one another. Mitch casually pointed to the fire alarm on the wall.
“Fire drills!” one boy yelled.
“Right. You know how to leave the classroom and where to go in the yard.”
“Did you have to practice?” a girl asked.
“Yes. All the time.”
“So you could save people?”
“That’s why I was there.”
He talked about riding on navy ships and airplanes, about jumping from thousands of feet in the sky. He had them enthralled for nearly half an hour.
“I hate to interrupt,” their teacher said, “but we have other special people here to speak. Thank you so much for coming.”
Mitch waved at the kids. He paused by Erin’s desk and spoke to her, then started for the door. Skye knew the exact moment he spotted her.
“What are you doing here?” he asked as he followed her into the hallway.
“I wanted to hear you speak.”
“Why?”
“I thought it would be interesting.”
They walked outside the building and stood in the parking lot.
She found herself oddly nervous. Had he always been so tall? Or maybe it was something else. Maybe it was Lexi and Dana’s ridiculous claims that she was in love with him.
“Erin really appreciates that you did this,” she said, staring at his chest. She couldn’t seem to look into his eyes. “She was so excited that you were coming to her class.”
“I was happy to do it. She’s a good kid.”
Skye risked raising her gaze. “I thought you’d hate her forever.”
“For not being mine?”
She nodded.
“I thought about it,” he admitted. “Then I realized if she was mine, she would be different and I don’t want her to change.”
It was the best thing he could have said.
“I’m glad,” she whispered, then cleared her throat. “You were really good with the kids. They loved hearing you talk.”
“Edited stories. The truth would keep them up for months.”
She was sure of that. “You talked about rescuing people. Who rescued you?”
“A guy named Pete.”
“A fellow SEAL?”
“Yes. He’s a few years younger than me. Married. They’re having their first baby.” He looked past her. “He dragged me to safety, then went to get help. He could have been killed. He was shot himself, but did that slow him down? No way. He’s back in Afghanistan right now.”
He sounded angry. With himself?
“Mitch, you’re getting a couple of medals for what happened. It’s not like you just sat there and had a good cry.”
He shrugged. “I laid down some cover. Got a couple of snipers.”
While he was possibly bleeding to death with his leg blown off. Sure. Just another day at the office.
One of the teacher’s aids walked up and joined them.
“Hi, Skye,” Monica said. “Mitch, that was amazing. Thanks again for coming to speak to the kids. You were a hit. There’s, um, going to be a reception later. You might like to come.” Monica barely spared her a glance. “You, too, Skye.”
A halfhearted invitation at best, Skye thought, trying not to step between Mitch and Monica. She saw the other woman’s interest and, while she wanted to claim him as her own, she wasn’t in any position to do that.
Annoyed, frustrated and not sure why, she gritted her teeth, excused herself and walked to her car. Monica and Mitch were still talking. Neither seemed to notice as she drove away.
Stupid man, she thought, turning the corner. He could date
anyone he wanted. She wasn’t interested in him. She never had been. He and Monica could get married and buy a house and she wouldn’t care for one minute. They were both stupid and they deserved each other.
MITCH RODE that evening, after dinner. Sunset was later now that they were heading into early summer. He started toward the cattle, then turned Bullet and rode by the chickens.
Free-range chickens were held in by a perimeter fence that kept them from disappearing toward Oklahoma and protected them from predators. Coops traveled with them and as the sun set, the chickens bedded down for the night. He’d talked to Arturo and had discovered that Erin was right. The damn chickens were fed a coconut-based feed. All they needed was a little Reggae music and they could be on vacation.
But he’d grown used to seeing them on the land and he had to admit they left behind an effective fertilizer. Going organic had meant contracting with local farmers for certified feed. It was good business all around.
He stared at the land that stretched to the horizon. Now that he was back he wondered how he’d stayed away for those many years. Why hadn’t he missed the Texas sky—bigger here than anywhere in the world? Why hadn’t he wanted to ride by the herd, work the cattle dogs, eat Fidela’s enchiladas and play chess with Arturo? He’d stayed away so long, he’d forgotten what home was like. Now that he was back he could see—
A dark shape moved across the open field, staying low and heading directly for the fence around the chickens. Mitch urged Bullet forward. He’d just checked the fencing a few days before. Was there a hole in it already?
He saw the opening seconds before the coyote dove for it. Without thinking, he reached for his shotgun, aimed and fired. The sound echoed in the night.
Inside their coops, the chickens began to shriek. The coyote, frightened but unharmed, raced in the opposite direction.
“Next time I won’t fire a warning shot,” Mitch yelled after it. The coyote didn’t slow.
He slid off Bullet and walked toward the hole in the fence. The entire structure was moved every few days as the chickens ate the grubs and scratched at the grass. The corners and points of connection were vulnerable to separating, allowing coyotes and other predators a way in.
This opening was just the right size for a small coyote. Mitch fished out a few connectors and clamped them into place. It wasn’t a permanent fix, but it would do for tonight. He and Arturo could put one of the guys on it tomorrow.
Lip Service Page 20
