by Arthurs, Nia
“I’ll take you home,” I say quietly.
She doesn’t bother to respond.
When I drop Ember off at Bee’s condo, she offers me a weak wave before slumping up the stairs and plodding into the house.
I sigh wearily and drive away. Guilt tortures me. Makes it hard to focus on the road. The woman I want is the woman I can never have.
Why did it have to be Ember? Why?
Of all the people I could have met that day in the park, of all the people I could have fallen for… it was Diandre’s sister.
God is cruel. Or maybe He’s just. Maybe this torture is punishment for my sins. Whatever the reason, my heart can barely handle the strain.
The truth won’t set me free. It will only bring Ember more pain.
My eyes linger on the ditches on the side of the highway. It would be so easy to yank the steering wheel, fly into a tree and just… end it all.
Before I can let that cowardly thought linger, I notice a pair of headlights flashing in my rearview mirror.
Strange.
I flick the indicator and turn down an unknown path. The mysterious vehicle follows. I slam my foot on the gas and tear through the back roads. My teeth would be chattering from the potholes if they weren’t clenched so tight.
There’s no way I’m taking this stalker to my parent’s neighborhood and putting my family in danger.
I weave and dip down poorly-lit lanes until I lose the tail. A sigh of relief breaks out of my chest. Who the hell was that? Seb?
I wouldn’t put it past him to try and scare me. His thinly veiled threat in the lobby tonight left an impression. Seb has everything he could ever want. If I open my mouth, it’ll all come crashing down.
But this doesn’t feel like Seb. His approach is more direct. In your face. Whatever his motivations, he doesn’t believe in slinking away. Playing from the shadows.
Then who could it be? Corey? Despite my impression to the contrary, he could still be in cahoots with Seb. Or maybe he acted independently?
The problem is solved for now. I need to find the road back to the highway so I can get home. Mom must be freaking out.
I search the area for a marker or sign when I hear the engine cough. My head whips to the gas tank.
The needle is on ‘E’.
The car limps forward a few more inches. Knowing the end is near, I swerve the wheel and pull the vehicle over. The engine gives out a second after the tires crush the grassy incline.
I’m stuck.
In the middle of nowhere.
I scoop my phone up and check the bars. No service. Dammit.
I should have called the police when I first suspected I was being followed. But in my defense, I didn’t think I’d run out of gas. It was my first time shaking a tail. Next time I’ll be better.
Hopefully, there is no next time.
What do I do now? I lean past the steering wheel to survey my surroundings. Tall, spindly trees. Dark night sky. No stars. No moon. Shadows churn within the chilly forest. Cicadas and toads scream loud enough to penetrate the frame of the car.
There’s no way I’m going outside to face the threats lurking there. Better to stay cooped up until morning and catch a ride back to town than act like a hero and get chopped by some psycho in the backwoods.
At least it’s not too hot tonight. I lean my head back and stare at the ceiling. Ember’s face wafts to mind. Conflicted, I push the thought away.
My flight is tomorrow. It would be so easy to leave Ember and never look back. After all, running has always been my defense mechanism of choice.
But leaving Ember alone isn’t so cut and dry. Now I know where she is. Who she is. I’ve held her in my arms. Tasted her lips. Spent hours talking to her, listening to her. Unearthing her layers and chipping closer to her soul.
She’s not a figment of my imagination anymore. She’s a woman. My woman. And leaving her alone feels like giving up my next breath. Impossible.
Ember will always call to me. Like a siren. Like a magnet to steel. And I don’t think I can resist her. Not unless she turns me away first.
And she will.
Nothing puts a damper on a relationship like finding out your boyfriend was involved in your brother’s murder. It’s an unforgiveable sin.
But giving Ember up is it’s own kind of death. Watching the love seep out of her eyes will end me. So maybe I tell her the truth and then run. Leave without looking back, without seeing her shatter from the pain.
Coward.
Ten years. Ten years and I still can’t seem to shake myself from that stupid pact. From the fear. From the selfishness. Back then, I was a teenager. Just a kid. Knowing nothing and thinking I knew everything.
Now, what’s my excuse?
A sudden, blaring light fills my vision. They’re headlights. A car is coming.
I throw my hands up and peer through the slits in my fingers. A man climbs out of a bulky SUV and jumps to the ground. I hear the impact his shoes make on the stones. My eyes trail the familiar cut of his form.
An inkling of recognition slithers through me, but self-preservation screams louder. Bells clang in my head. A hand reaches out. My hand. I flip the lock mechanism. The resulting clang says I’ve shut every door.
Not that it’ll be much protection if this guy is intent on getting in. There are plenty of alternatives.
I look down, casting about for some sort of weapon, when a quick, decisive rap jangles the window. A muffled voice calls my name. “Axle?”
My gaze climbs to the stranger. Seb? My heart jumps, having built up so much adrenaline that it demands release even though there is no present threat.
I pop the door open and step out. A cool wind hammers my face. I glare at him. “Man, you nearly gave me a heartache.”
“Sorry.” Seb grins. “I couldn’t believe it was your car stuck out here. Were you coming to visit me?”
“Visit you?”
“Yeah.” He points forward. “I live in the house facing Green Lake. This is a private road only the members of the community use.”
“No. I’m not… wait, you live by Green Lake?”
“Yup.” He nods proudly. “Connor’s place. His parents moved out of town a few years ago and I snatched the house for a great price.”
Nausea rolls in my gut.
Seb nods to my ride. “Car trouble?”
“Yeah.” I swallow. “It’s alright though. I’ve got it handled.”
“How?” He lifts his phone and turns the screen to face me. “There’s no service here.” Seb gestures to his truck and tilts his head. “How about you grab a ride with me? I was just heading home anyway. I’ve got plenty of room.”
“I’m fine. Really—”
“Come on. What are friends for?” Seb nudges me forward. “I’ll help you grab a tow in the morning.”
I find myself in his luxury SUV and heading to his mansion on top of the hill. Memories of the night we drove to Connor’s party blow through my head. When my eyes land on the house with it’s sprawling lawn and many windows, I almost throw up.
“Hey, you good man?” Seb asks.
“Fine,” I growl but the moment he shows me inside, I head to the bathroom and dry heave. Using the hem of my T-shirt, I dot at my forehead and blow out a breath.
Here, in this house that looks exactly like it did ten years ago, the past is breathing down my neck. How does Seb live with these memories?
When I emerge from the bathroom, I find Seb in the kitchen. He slides a beer over the counter. I take it but don’t drink.
Seb sinks into a bar stool. “Maribella’s staying at her mom’s for the night.”
“Oh.”
“She’s unusually sensitive lately, but I’m not worried. We’ll make up by tomorrow.”
I stay quiet because I’m not interested in Seb’s relationship problems. My grip on the bottle tightens. “Seb, were you following me earlier?”
“What? No. Was someone following you?”
His
incredulous expression is convincing. My resolve falters. “Yeah. It’s how I got lost.”
“I was with Maribella until I came home and found you on the road. You can call and ask her if you want.”
I glance away. Seb’s slimy, but he’s telling the truth. “There’s no need for that.”
Silence reigns in the kitchen.
“I, uh, I wanted to apologize for what I said in the lobby.” Seb squirms. “I have a good life here. And Ember’s moved on. We can’t let our past mistakes destroy our lives. You know?”
I nod but deep in my heart, I disagree with him. Seb’s not worried about Ember or the truth. All he wants to do is protect his own.
“I hear you’re leaving tomorrow.” Seb takes a swig of his drink and pins me with his dark eyes. “Just leave it all behind, Ax. Leave it and don’t look back. Ember’s gonna be just fine.”
His words are supposed to be comforting, so why does it feel like another threat?
20
Ember
“Come on, Axle. Pick up.” I lower my phone and type up another message. The other three I’ve sent since morning have gone unanswered.
Aunt B floats into the room. A plastic shower cap puckers around her bound up black hair. A fluffy towel grips her slim frame. “What are you doing?”
“Trying to reach Axle,” I mumble.
“Didn’t he drop you home yesterday?”
“Yes.”
“Then why do you look so desperate? You two are cool, right? He didn’t break up with you.”
“No, he didn’t. But I spent our last night together snotting all over his shoulder and bawling about Diandre. I figured we should do something a little lighter before he leaves this afternoon, but he’s not picking up.”
“Maybe he’s with his family.”
“I thought of that, but if he was hanging with his parents he would have answered me. It’s weird that his cell is going straight to voicemail.”
Aunt B gasps dramatically.
I whip my head toward her. “What?”
“Maybe he’s ghosting you.”
“Ghosting?”
“Yeah. He probably left already and blocked your number so he didn’t have to break up with you in person.”
I throw a pillow at her head. It goes crooked and thumps harmlessly to the ground. “Axle wouldn’t do that.”
“How are you so sure?”
I chew on my bottom lip. It’s a good question. Aunt B won’t buy my ‘I know it in my soul’ explanation. And maybe she’s on to something. Why else would Axle ignore all my calls and messages?
“I’m calling Kolby.” I dial his number.
After two rings, the line connects and Kolby’s deep voice rings in my ear. “Ember? Is Axle with you?”
“No.” Why would Kolby ask that? Panic tightens my throat. “I’ve been calling him all morning, but he’s not picking up.”
“So have we. Mom is really upset.”
“You think he’s missing?”
“We’re not sure. Mom tried to post a missing person’s report just in case but the police said we needed to wait forty-eight hours before we can do that.”
Knots form in my stomach. Flashbacks of the night Diandre didn’t come home assault me. Mom was beside herself with worry too. She started calling the police before dawn and demanded an investigation.
I can’t imagine what state Diandre’s body would have been in if we’d waited forty-eight hours to search for him.
“Ember?”
“I’m right here,” I say breathlessly.
Aunt B wanders over to me and rubs my back. “You okay?” she mouths.
I nod. “Kolby, have you tried calling Seb or Maribella? Maybe they know where Axle is.”
“No, I haven’t called. But I don’t think he’s with any of his friends.”
“What do you mean?”
Kolby hesitates and then admits, “I followed Axle last night.”
“What do you mean you ‘followed’ him? Followed him where?”
“After you rushed out of the ice cream shop, I got curious. I know something’s going on, but Axle won’t talk to me about it. So I tailed him. I hung back and watched when he took you home. After, I kept following him and… I think he noticed me.”
“What?”
“I tried to keep up, but he turned off the highway and I lost track of his car. When I tried to call, he didn’t answer. I wanted to search the back roads, but I got scared and went home.”
I can barely swallow past the lump in my throat. No wonder Axle wasn’t picking up. There’s no reception out there in the woods. My fears spring to life and torment me with a host of grim possibilities.
“He could have broken down out there. Or worse.”
“I know.”
Kolby sounds torn up about it so I try to focus on the positive. “Maybe he’s just waiting to hitchhike a ride so he can get back to town.”
“Maybe. Or maybe he got hurt out there and died alone.”
“Don’t say that.” I lick my lips. “What about your parents? Have you told your mom what you did?”
“Not yet.”
“Why not? She deserves an explanation.”
“If I tell her I was tailing my brother, she’ll kill me.”
“Tell her. You can’t run from the truth, Kolby. It’s better to face it and deal with the consequences.”
“But… I can’t. She’ll be disappointed.”
“I’m sure she’d rather be disappointed with all the facts than worry over a lie.”
“You’re right. I’ll tell her.” His voice cracks. “But Ember, what if something happened to him? It’ll be my fault. I should have never followed him around last night—”
“It’s not your fault, Kolby. Axle will come home. I believe it.”
I hear him suck in a deep breath. “Would you like to come over?”
I glance at Aunt B. “Can I?”
“My mom wanted to meet you anyway.”
“I’ll be right there.”
“See you soon.”
We hang up.
“Where are you going?” Aunt B’s brown eyes follow me as I trod around the room, grabbing my purse and pulling my hair into a bun.
“I’m going to Axle’s place.”
Her jaw drops. “Are you crazy?”
“Maybe. But I can’t sit around here and do nothing while he’s missing. I’d rather be around people who care about him just as much—or even more—than I do. When he comes home, I want to hold him and… I just need to see him. Badly.”
“This is a horrible idea.”
I grab her car keys and dangle them from my fingertips. “Are you driving or should I?”
“What? I’m coming?”
“I need support. All of this is taking me back to the night Diandre died.” I push out my bottom lip. “You won’t leave me hanging, right?”
Aunt B coughs. “Just… give me ten minutes.”
She takes twenty but I spend that time blowing Axle’s phone up with messages and calls. It goes to voicemail each time.
I don’t want to believe that anything serious has happened to him, but back when I learned the news of Diandre I thought he’d be fine too.
I won’t take any chances.
* * *
Aunt B follows the directions Kolby texts to my phone and we find Axle’s house easily. It’s a sprawling Victorian home with a beautiful garden and a porch swing.
I imagine Axle roaming around the garden with his friends when he was little. Enjoying lazy afternoons with his family sipping lemonade on the wooden porch. He must have been so cute.
I hope he’s okay.
The bang of Aunt B’s door as she slams it shut startles me. I glance over to her, watching as she slips her sunshades over her head. “Again, I think this is a bad idea. What if Axle didn’t want to introduce you to his parents yet?”
“He’s missing. All that matters is finding him safe and sound. Are you going to keep complaining or will you help
me out?”
She kicks a rock and sulks. “I’ll help.”
We head up the walkway to the porch. Before we’ve cleared the last step, the screen door flies open and a pale woman with short brown hair and brown eyes sprints out. She stops in front of me and grabs my hand.
“You must be Ember,” she says. Anxiety carves lines around her eyes and mouth, but even with the signs of age she’s a beautiful woman. I can see Axle in the shape of her nose and ears.
“Yes.” I squeeze her hand. “This is my aunt.”
“Call me Bee,” Aunt B says, taking the hand Axle’s mom offers.
“I’m Jill.” She pulls her arm back and bites on her lower lip. “Thank you so much for coming. It’s good to have a distraction while we wait for news.”
Aunt B nods. “I’m sure Axle was caught up somewhere and is heading home as soon as possible.”
“That’s what we’re hoping for, but it’s hard not to imagine the worse.” She gestures to the door. “Come on in. We’re all huddled in the living room, staring at our phones.”
We follow her inside. A stocky man in a plaid shirt and khakis jumps to his feet. He has Axle’s grey eyes, but while his son’s are full of sparkling mischief, the father’s crackles with wisdom. I’m instantly at ease.
His smile is genuine as he looks at me even though there’s a hint of worry in his gaze. “Ember, right?”
“Yes. This is my aunt.”
“Bee.” Aunt B offers her hand.
“Greg,” Axle’s father says. He gestures to the sofas. “I’m sorry we had to meet like this. When Axle comes home, he’ll be a little embarrassed we made all this fuss, but it’s better to be cautious. Crazy world out there.”
“This is my fault, Dad.” Kolby walks into the room, wringing his hands and staring at the floor. He sits close to Greg. “I’m sorry.”
Greg wraps a hand around Kolby’s shoulders. “It’s okay, son. No one is blaming you.”
My gaze fastens on the two men. A quick peek at Aunt B says she is equally entranced. It’s just so different to see a white man reassuring a muscled, black teenager with such sincerity and kindness.
I’ve always known that Kolby was a treasured member of the family. I’ve seen the brothers interact and I sense how much Kolby admires Axle. But watching the way Kolby’s father loves on him brings tears to my eyes.
