Marley’s stomach tightened, and, instinctively, she knew he was describing her and Jake. She shouldn’t be surprised because she’d always known Jake was just like her father, but she was. One, because she hadn’t thought her father had noticed what was going on between her and Jake, and two, because she’d never considered herself to be anything like her mother, who’d given up on life.
“A relationship like that,” her father said, looking down at his hands, “it’s either the best thing for two people or the very worst. If it doesn’t lift you up and make you strive to be a better person, then it drags you down until there’s nothing left. That’s what happened to your mother. Our fire burned through her until it changed her from the woman I fell in love with to someone I didn’t even know. And it threatened to do the same to me.”
Marley’s gaze slid to the fire, and as she watched the flames flicker over the logs, she saw herself in her father’s story. She saw Jake. And she saw what they were doing to each other. Not making each other happy like two people should, but tormenting one another.
“Hot’s fun and exciting in the short term, pumpkin, but it doesn’t last. Marriage . . .” He shook his head and stared at the fire. “Marriage takes commitment. It takes two people who are compatible. Who bring out the best in each other. Who trust one another. At the end of the day, you don’t want to be traveling that road with someone who will cut and run when times get rough—and trust me, they will get rough. You want to be on that path with someone you can depend on above all else.”
He turned to look at her, and she saw truth in his blue eyes. A truth she didn’t want to hear but knew she needed to face. “I know at your age, when it feels like you have your whole life ahead of you, you think marriage is something that should come from the heart. But if that heart’s making you miserable, maybe it’s time to think about someone who can give you what you need and want long-term without the anguish.”
She knew what he was doing. She wasn’t naïve enough not to recognize that he was talking about Gray. But she couldn’t argue with any of the things he’d said. Because he was right. Jake would make a horrible husband. Even if they could get past the fact he was afraid to admit his feelings for her, he’d be domineering and arrogant and he would irritate her to no end. And she’d do the same exact thing to him. They’d argue and fight when they weren’t burning up with passion, and even though that passion would flare hotter than anything else she’d ever felt, it wouldn’t be enough. Someday it would burn out. Just like her parents’ love had turned to nothing but cold, barren cinders.
Her mind drifted to Gray, to the difference between the two men, and she frowned at her father. “Five years ago you didn’t even like Gray.”
“Five years ago I was jealous that a man I barely knew was stealing my only daughter. I didn’t know how you really felt about him until we lost him on that op. If I’d known . . .” He shook his head. “Well, let’s just say things would have been different. I’m trying to make up for that now.”
Marley knew he was. Their relationship had taken a hit after Gray had come into her life, and in the five years since the man’s disappearance, it had never truly recovered. She knew she was partly to blame for that. Running off to work at Aegis had been easier than dealing with her—and his—guilt. But she wanted to mend that rift now. Wanted to do something to make everything better for all of them.
Her father placed his hand on her knee and gently squeezed. “Come by the house. Have dinner with us tonight. Amelia’s making a roast. She’s a really good cook.”
Marley sighed. “I’m not sure how I feel about Amelia yet. She could be my sister, you know.”
He grinned a mischievous smile that crinkled the skin near his eyes but brightened his face and made him look ten years younger. “Love sees no age.”
She rolled her eyes. “You just sat here and told me that love shouldn’t be a major factor in marriage.”
“I’m not marrying her. I’m just enjoying our time together.”
Okay, ew. She held up a hand. “TMI, Dad. TMI.”
He chuckled and pushed to his feet. “Just come over for dinner and give her a chance. She might surprise you.”
Marley doubted it, but for him she was willing to try. She walked him to the door, lifted to her toes, and hugged him. “I’ll think about it.”
“Think about everything.” He let go of her, reached for the door handle, then swiveled back. “Oh, there was one other thing I wanted to talk to you about.”
“What?”
“You mentioned the other day that part of the reason you left Aegis was because you wanted to work in the field and that Ryder wouldn’t let you.”
“Yeah?”
“You know I’ve never been a fan of that kind of work for you myself, but if it’s something you really want”—his eyes held hers—“then I want you to be happy.”
Marley’s brow wrinkled. “Are you saying—?”
“I’m not saying anything yet. But I am making you an offer. If you come back to Omega, you can work in the field. As much or as little as you want.”
Marley’s eyes widened, and a smile broke across her face.
“On one condition.” He held up a hand. “You do it with a partner. Someone I trust. Someone I know will take care of you if things get rough. Call me old-fashioned, but I’m not about to unleash my only daughter alone in the field.”
Gray. He was talking about Gray. He was giving her what she’d wanted for longer than she could remember, but she had to do it with Gray. Her smile turned into a scowl. “Are you trying to manipulate me?”
“Absolutely.” He kissed her cheek, then opened the door and stepped out onto her porch. “Dinner’s at seven. I’m expecting you there.”
Marley watched him walk down her drive, slide his sunglasses on to cut the winter glare, then climb into his SUV and pull away.
Closing the door, she leaned back against the hard wood and stared up at the chandelier hanging in her entry.
Her father’s marriage announcement echoed in her head.
She’d be lying to herself if she didn’t admit she wanted to get married. She wanted a partner. She wanted a family and a career she enjoyed, and yes, she wanted love too. And she was so very tired of waiting for those things to happen.
It was time to face facts. Marriage would never be on the table with Jake. She’d seen his reaction to the topic the morning after their wild night in the jungle. And if she’d learned one hard lesson over the last few weeks, it was that love didn’t do anything but make people nuts. Maybe her father was right. Maybe what she needed most wasn’t the fiery passion she had with Jake. Maybe what she needed was someone who appreciated her, who respected her, who wanted to make her happy. Love didn’t have to be something to fear. It could blossom and grow and change. And it could be stable. Something she needed more than anything else right now.
Her stomach rolled. Pushing away from the door, she walked back into her living room and stared at the cordless phone on the end table while nerves bounced around in her belly. Thoughts of Gray, of Jake, swirled in her mind. And a future she’d always been too scared to imagine rolled out before her like a long red carpet.
Do it. Like a bandage. Just rip it off.
Nerves vibrating, she crossed to the phone, picked it up and dialed. Gray answered on the second ring, excitement filling his voice. “Marlene?”
“I’m not agreeing to anything yet,” she said quickly, “but I think maybe it’s time I heard you out.” She bit her lip. “How do you feel about dinner tonight?”
“What do you think about pink for the flowers?” Amelia pushed a magazine in front of Marley and pointed toward an arrangement on the page. “Everyone loves pink.”
Reminding herself her father’s assistant was just helping, not purposely trying to annoy her, Marley glanced at the photo, then looked quickly back to the report s
he’d been scanning. “Fine. Whatever you think is best.”
Amelia straightened in front of Marley’s new desk at Omega Intel, her auburn hair falling over her shoulder as she moved. “I get the feeling you don’t like pink.”
No, Marley didn’t like pink at all, but she wasn’t about to say so. Drawing in a calming breath, she looked up, even though all she wanted to do was go back to the reports detailing the latest ops Omega had run, refreshing her memory on what her father’s company had been up to while she’d been at Aegis. “I’m fine with whatever you want to do. The less I have to think about the details, the better off I’ll be.”
Amelia frowned. “Most brides are excited about the details of their own wedding.”
Marley’s stomach flipped at just the word—wedding—and she quickly looked back down at her papers. “Well, I’m not your typical bride.”
Yesterday she’d finally given in and agreed to marry Gray, and Amelia was already rushing forward with the wedding plans. Yes, Marley knew saying yes was sudden—only three days after her father had gone to her house to have that little chat—but she needed a brand-new start. Gray was crazy about her. He’d made that more than clear ever since he’d come home, and she knew he’d make a good husband. Plus, everyone was so excited—Gray, her father, Amelia—it had to be the right decision.
Thoughts of Jake flittered through her mind. Their days in the jungle together. The night they’d spent at his house. Then the moment he’d walked away from her on that path at the country club. Her heart pinched. Pinched and ached so bad it stole her breath. But the hard truth was that he didn’t love her the way she needed. And the sooner she put the past behind her and looked toward the future, the better off she’d be.
She smiled up at Amelia when all she really wanted to do was scowl. “It’s just nerves. Don’t worry about me. With the new job and all, I think it’s best if I let you handle the details. The thought of whipping a wedding together while going through all this”—she looked down at the stacks of papers around her—“has me seeing stars.”
Amelia relaxed, lifted the magazine from Marley’s desk, and pulled it against her chest. “I understand. Don’t worry about the details. I’ll handle them all. Everything’s going to be perfect. You’ll see.”
She left the room, and alone, Marley braced her elbows on the desk and dropped her head into her hands.
Two weeks from now she’d be married. Was she jumping the gun? Probably. But Gray had been so adamant they do it quickly, she’d let him talk her into it. Plus, part of her was afraid if she didn’t do it fast, she’d chicken out. She kept telling herself the sooner she got through the ceremony, the sooner she could get on with her life. But the lifeline she kept holding on to was the fact that once she was married, she could work in the field, which was something she’d wanted longer than she could remember.
A knock sounded at her office door, followed by a familiar female voice. “Hey,” Olivia said. “Everything okay?”
Dropping her hands, Marley looked toward Olivia, standing in the doorway, a worried expression on her face. Marley’s stomach tightened. She could hide her anxiety from Amelia, but Olivia was another story.
“Hey,” Marley said, working for calm when she felt anything but. “Yeah. Everything’s fine.”
Olivia stepped into the room, wearing slim black slacks and a red fitted top, and eyed her suspiciously. “I heard the news. Congratulations?”
Just the way she said the last word made Marley’s heart speed up and thoughts of Jake ping around in her head again.
This isn’t about Jake, dammit. It’s about you. Stop thinking about Jake.
She forced a smile she didn’t feel. “Thanks. It’s very exciting.”
Olivia’s expression softened, telling Marley the woman saw right through her lie. “Are you sure about this? I mean, you and Jake—”
Oh no. Marley pushed out of her seat. She couldn’t let Olivia go there. She and Jake were done. She’d put that behind her and only wanted to focus on what came next. “Yes, I’m sure. Gray and I are a good match. It makes sense.”
“To whom? Him or you?”
“To everyone.” Marley forced herself not to get worked up because she knew her friend was just concerned, but she didn’t need to justify this to anyone but herself, and she’d already done that. “Look, Liv. I understand what you’re trying to say, but I’ve thought this through from every angle. And I’m making the right decision for me. That’s all you really need to know.”
“Okay. If you’re sure this is what you want.”
“I am.”
Olivia stared at her a long moment, then finally nodded. “In that case, someone needs to tell Amelia that pink is your least favorite color.” She winked. “You can thank me later.”
Olivia moved for the door, and Marley closed it after her so no one else could bother her. Leaning her head back against the hard wood, she stared up at the ceiling and blew out a long breath. Olivia’s question swirled in her head.
Was this what she wanted? She wanted to be settled. Wanted a husband and a family. Wanted more out of life than just being someone’s assistant. And she wanted to matter. With Gray, at Omega, she could have all of those things. And she’d have someone who respected and doted on her. Someone who could make her happy. Did it matter that she didn’t love him?
Yes! her heart screamed. But her head ignored it. Because she was done listening to her heart. All her heart had done was make her miserable. Her father was right. It was time to be sensible. And the most sensible thing for her to do was marry Gray.
She pushed away from the door, returned to her desk, and went back to her reports. And told herself, for the hundredth time, that she was doing the right thing.
“Thanks for coming in on a Saturday.” Jake pushed back from the conference table and reached across to shake Allison Witlock’s hand. “I’ll be in touch.”
The late twenty-something slim brunette shook his hand, then grasped her bag from the floor and slipped the strap over her shoulder. “When will you be making a decision?”
A flutter moved through Jake’s gut, one he couldn’t stop anytime he thought of filling the vacant position at Aegis. It had been two weeks. Marley wasn’t coming back. And after today . . .
That flutter moved to full-on nausea, and the moment he’d heard the news about Marley and McKnight whipped through his brain, dragging the air from his lungs all over again.
Miller had stopped by his house, four days after Mason’s party. It wasn’t like Jake to stay home, but he hadn’t felt like going to work. Hadn’t felt like doing anything but drinking. He’d pretended to be sick, but Landon—who’d been through a serious depression himself once before—had taken one look at him and known the truth. He’d tossed Jake into a cold shower, made him some food to sober him up, then dropped the bombshell Jake had never expected.
Clearing his throat, Jake tried not to think too much about Marley’s—his stomach revolted again—wedding. But just the word . . .
How the hell could she marry the guy? She didn’t love McKnight. She’d told Jake as much. She loved him, dammit.
And you pushed her away. Why wouldn’t she marry McKnight? She loved him once. And he’s made it more than clear he wants to spend the rest of his life making her happy. All you’ve done is mess with her heart and confuse the hell out of her.
Realizing his thoughts were drifting and that Allison Witlock was watching him with a perplexed expression, Jake forced a pathetic smile and refocused on their conversation. “Within the next two weeks if all goes well. I have several other candidates I’m interviewing.”
“Of course.” Ms. Witlock stepped toward the door. Her hair was pinned up in a stylish do, she was confident and assertive, and dressed sharply in navy slacks, a white shirt, and a crisp linen blazer, she was professional and courteous. And her résumé was stellar with experience at s
everal defense firms and personal ties to the Middle East and Europe that would benefit Aegis immensely. But something about her felt off. Something he couldn’t quite put his finger on.
She turned when she reached the door. “I look forward to hearing from you soon.”
As soon as she was gone, Jake dropped into a chair at the table, rested his elbows on his knees, and leaned forward. The ache he’d been living with the last two weeks spread outward from the center of his chest, making it hard to breathe.
Marley was going to marry the fucker. And there wasn’t a damn thing he could do to stop it because it wasn’t his place. He couldn’t even warn her off because sometime over the last few days he’d realized she was right in that he was looking for a reason to condemn McKnight. He hadn’t been able to find any link between McKnight and his Tahoe explosion, and there wasn’t a shred of evidence that said McKnight’s story about Colombia wasn’t anything but true.
Which meant Jake was the asshole here, not McKnight. For accusing an innocent man. For hating the guy simply because he cared about Marley. For almost ruining her life when she had a chance to be happy.
He had to get out of his head. Had to stop thinking about her. He’d done the right thing by letting her go. What she did now was her choice.
Shoving down the emotions, he reached for the file in front of him, pushed to his feet, and headed for the door. Humming carried across the room as he drew closer to Marley’s old office, and a flicker of hope whisked through him at the thought she was there. But when he rounded the corner and peeked past the doorjamb, the woman behind Marley’s desk wasn’t the one he’d hoped to see.
Eve glanced up. “Hey. I didn’t know anyone was here.”
Jake stopped at the doorway, couldn’t seem to make himself step into Marley’s old office, and eyed Eve, dressed in a slim-fitting red dress with a heart-shaped neckline and tiny cap sleeves. “Doing interviews.”
Fatal Pursuit (The Aegis Series) Page 27
