by Lolly Walter
“It’s been awful. Ebony and Zeke are distraught. The other runners are scared. There’s been finger-pointing and accusations.” Joe paused and dropped his voice. “There’s even been talk that you stole the baby.”
Boggs feigned shock. “Why in the world would anyone believe I stole a baby? I retreated with Candy last night after the unfortunate incident with your lover.”
Ice slid down Joe’s spine. “My lover? Devin? The guy’s got a little crush on me, but we’re partners. That’s all. But the baby, I think people think you did it because it would be a shrewd business move. I know babies can fetch a lot of money up north, even when they’re not white. We don’t know anyone else with the means to break into our compound, take a baby, then transport it to a place where they could get money for it.”
“It’s a funny story. The runners certainly have a high opinion of my power.” Boggs moved his swiveling, rolling chair so his body nestled between Joe’s legs. “Give Ebony my condolences and tell her you and the other runners will take her runs for the next week while she grieves. Zeke, too, of course.”
“I don’t think that’s going to cut it, Brandon. I’m worried that if the baby isn’t found, the runners may strike.”
Smirking, Boggs dropped his head and sniffed Joe’s crotch. He nuzzled in with his nose, and Joe bit his lip to hide his disgust.
When Boggs lifted his head again, he said, “I would crush any disruption in our schedule. The runners aren’t stupid. They value their food and shelter.”
“But they may be angry or disillusioned enough to leave. And without them, you don’t have a business. You can replace some of them quickly, sure, but it would take time to rebuild your stable. I’m guessing there are other entertainment businesses similar to Flights of Fantasy that would step in to fill the gap. We’d lose customers, short-term and long-term. The baby needs to be returned.”
Boggs stood, his chair flying out behind him and hitting the brown-paneled wall. He grabbed Joe by the hips and yanked him close. So slowly that the anticipation was excruciating, he moved his lips toward Joe’s.
At the last moment, Joe dove and kissed Boggs’s neck, sucking and licking until Boggs moaned. He let up, and Boggs pushed him backward onto the desk and climbed on top of him.
Boggs pinned Joe at the biceps. “Do you know why I like you so much, Joe?” He kissed along Joe’s collarbone.
“No, sir.”
“When I was young” — Boggs licked a stripe up Joe’s throat and continued, whispering in his ear — “I knew a boy. He was sweet and innocent and so very beautiful, though not as beautiful as you. His hair curled exactly like yours, though.” Boggs lifted his face and met Joe’s eyes. “We were fools in love, and he was the gentlest boy, fair and decent, I have ever known. Oh, how I loved him. I envy you now, your relationship with Devin.”
Joe tried to sit up, to guide Boggs off of him, but Boggs gripped his arms tighter.
“Devin’s not my—”
Boggs jerked his head down, trying to catch Joe’s lips.
Joe flinched away.
“He’s your lover. There’s no point in denying it. I’ve known you five years, Joseph, and I’ve never seen you shrink from my affection, no matter how much you hated it. It’s okay. It is. Like I said, I’ve known love. But let me finish my story. Ask me what happened to my lover. Grant was his name.”
Joe shifted, tried to find some traction. His feet dangled from the desk, not reaching the floor.
Boggs leaned onto one of Joe’s arms and moved the hand that had been holding it to tangle in the hair on the top of Joe’s head. He pulled tight, holding Joe down even more securely.
Joe hadn’t been scared of Boggs in a long time, but right now, he was terrified. “What happened to Grant, Brandon?”
“My father killed him. Terrible business. I was sixteen. Came home one day to find Grant hanging from my bedroom door. Broke my heart. I cried for weeks. Swore I’d hate my father forever, wouldn’t rest until I had revenge.” Boggs shook his head, seeming lost in the memory, his smile becoming distorted and grotesque. “And then, after I’d gnashed my teeth and cried my tears, I went to work for that son of a bitch, exactly like he expected me to. This company is his, you see. So Joseph? Joe?”
Joe nodded, afraid of what he was about to hear.
“Listen to me.” Boggs gently shook Joe by the hair. “There is no love, no compassion left inside me. If I’m the kind of man who could make a trillionaire of the man who murdered my only true lover, if I’m the kind of man who could take a terrified fourteen-year-old boy and make him believe he had to let me fuck him in order for him to survive” — he paused and brushed his thumb over Joe’s cheekbone — “if I’m the kind of man who could steal a baby and sell it to the highest bidder, what makes you think I won’t take your delicious blond lover out there in the hallway and do to him what my father did to Grant?”
Joe tried to find words, some slick way to make everything all right. Nothing came.
Boggs kissed him, forced his mouth open and bit hard on his lower lip. “You will go back to the Flats and give them the message I already gave you. You will be my good little boy, Joesy, and do what I say, put out any fires you see, keep the runners in line, or I will fuck up Devin so bad he’ll haunt your nightmares for the rest of your miserable life. Do you understand me?”
Joe shuddered.
Boggs yanked his hair harder.
“I understand.”
“Glad we had this little chat, Joseph. Now,” Boggs climbed off Joe and helped him to his feet. “I think it’s time you headed back to your place, don’t you? I’ll see you at the next runners’ meeting. Be sure those bruises are gone and you’re freshly showered. I like you perfect.”
Joe stumbled away from the desk and out the door. He didn’t bother pretending when he saw Devin. He wrapped his arms around Devin’s neck and buried his head in the big guy’s chest. He dragged his nose across the spot where Devin’s neck met his shoulder, breathing in the scent of vanilla and sweat. “It didn’t work. Let’s go.”
Silently, he led them back to whatever waited at the Flats.
***
“That’s really all that happened?”
“I told you already, yes.”
Joe was lying, though Devin wasn’t sure why. The story remained brief and consistent every time Devin asked. But Joe’s hands shook, and he wouldn’t meet Devin’s eyes. That little mealy-mouthed mouse fucker Boggs had done something, threatened or hurt Joe somehow. And now Joe had lied to Devin and was speed-walking back to the Flats to lie to everyone else.
They passed under the old highway and trudged up the hill that would lead them home. Devin wondered when he’d begun to think of the Flats as home. He’d been there closing in on two months now, but the length of time wasn’t what had him discounting his old home in the deep, rolling hills west of downtown in favor of this new place. Nor was it the food, delicious though it was, or the camaraderie of the other runners.
More likely, home meant nights spent in Joe’s arms, days spent at his side, running and talking. Those kisses they’d exchanged this morning. The way Joe made him feel safe. It was the trust they shared, the present moment excluded.
Letting the lie stand for now, Devin changed tactics. “What do you think Ebony and Zeke will have to say?”
“I think Zeke might kill me.”
“I’m being serious, Joe.”
“So am I, papi. This is important.” Joe swerved in front of Devin and put a hand on his shoulder. “No matter what happens, I don’t want you to interfere.”
“Fuck that shit.” Devin stepped out of Joe’s reach. “You tell me you think Zeke might kill you and your very next statement is ‘don’t get involved’? Fuck that. I’m involved. If someone tries to hurt you, I will be there, and there’s not a damned thing you can do to stop me.”
“You stayed outside at headquarters. It’s the same thing.”
“Yeah, and that was obviously a
mistake. Something happened to you in there.”
“Nothing happened. Now, when we get back to the Flats, I want you to be quiet and let me handle things. Don’t say anything. Don’t stand with me. Don’t—”
“Don’t use my own brain. Let Joe dictate what I do, even when it’s the last thing I want. Got it.”
Joe made a strangled noise and threw his hands in the air. “You’re being unreasonable. I told you, all that matters to me is keeping you safe. Why can’t you just let me do it? I know what I’m doing.”
“I’m not stupid.”
“I never said you were.”
“I’m standing with you. I’m speaking up for you. I’m protecting you right back.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Why not?”
“I told you. I keep telling you. I need to keep you safe.”
“What the fuck about what I need?”
“You need to stay alive.”
“I need you, stupid.” This whole pointless argument boiled down to that. Devin returned to Joe, cupped his cheek, and laced their fingers. “Tanner was so worried about protecting me that he went out and got himself killed and left me alone. It crushed me, losing him. Now I have you, and you matter to me. Jesus, Joe.” Devin cast about for the right words. He needed Joe to understand. “I don’t just want to have sex with you to pass the time. I want to be with you because these last two months, spending every minute with you, you make me happy. I depend on you to make the days matter. You’re asking me to stand by and let someone take that away from me. I’m not doing it. Stop asking me to.”
Joe bowed his head. “I’m sorry. This is all spiraling out of control, and I don’t know how to fix it. I’ll try to stop asking you to do things I wouldn’t be willing to do if our roles were reversed, but I’m still going to try to protect you.”
“Partners?”
“Partners.”
“Then let’s face this together.”
“First…” Joe unhooked his hand from Devin’s and wrapped his arms around Devin’s shoulders. He swayed on his tiptoes and whispered right near Devin’s ear. “I think you’re amazing.”
Devin patted Joe’s back. “You’re not about to die, Joe. I swear. Stop being mushy. It’s freaky coming from you.”
“Okay, yeah.” Joe pulled back and offered a smile. He started toward the Flats and only hesitated a little when Devin took hold of his hand.
They passed the last few blocks in silence. The air hung still, absent any breeze. The effect was stifling. It fit the mood. Whatever waited up at the Flats, and Devin was confident Ebony wouldn’t let Zeke kill Joe, it still came with the loss of a child, and that was bad enough. Devin squeezed Joe’s fingers and calmed his own breathing.
Around the corner from the Flats came the sound of many voices, all talking quietly. The sound was muted, but an agitated buzz underlaid the calm. When Joe and Devin rounded the corner, they came face to face with what had to be the whole complement of runners. The building must be empty.
Oliver, the back-door security guard who’d never spoken in Devin’s presence, stood off to the side, his whole body screaming tension. When he saw Joe, he walked over and flanked him. His hands rested at his hips, and Devin imagined there must be some weapon at the ready in the man’s pockets.
All the people quieted and watched Joe. Devin picked some of the other A runners out of the crowd. Marcus and Flix stood together, as they always did, for once so still. Dottie and Aubrey had their arms around each other. Trig and Zeke stood together, blocking Ebony behind them with a wall of solid muscle. Devin took it as a victory that none of the big men moved toward Joe. At least they seemed willing to hear him out.
“I talked to Boggs,” Joe said, and though his hand was clammy in Devin’s, his voice remained firm and authoritative. “He says he didn’t take Nina. He wants us to let Zeke and Ebony have the next week off. It’s not any consolation, I know. I’m sorry.”
“He took our baby, Joe. You’re damned right that’s not good enough.” Zeke leaned heavily on Trig, and Devin wondered how exhausted he must be.
“He says he didn’t. Can we all search the area for her? We can organize teams or—”
“We don’t need your help. You repeat whatever the boss tells you, don’t you?” Only anguish laced the words. “I need you to go down there and get your fucking ass licked or whatever it is you do with him and get my baby back.”
“I tried. God, Zeke, I tried. I swear it. He says he didn’t do it. I don’t have any leverage with him. I’m so sorry.”
Ebony pushed her way past Zeke. She was a large woman, all curves and softness over strong muscles, but she looked tiny now, her shoulders hunched, her face pinched. Devin remembered how she’d cared for him when they’d had sex, how gentle and patient she’d been. How excited to be a mother.
“Did you try your hardest, Joe?” Her eyes were so bloodshot they looked like they were bleeding.
“I did.” Joe took her hands. His voice dropped to a whisper that Devin could barely hear. “I would never hurt you, Ebony, or let you be hurt. Not if I could help it. I have to keep everyone else safe. Keep them out of trouble.”
Ebony’s dead eyes moved to Devin. She scoured his face, his body. He thought she was going to say something to him, but she nodded her head and turned back to Joe. “I can’t do this again.”
Then she and Joe were holding each other, crying, Ebony’s loud wails and Joe’s staccato sobs puncturing the quiet of the other runners. Her hair stuck to Joe’s face. Her eyes were screwed shut, but Joe’s were open, watching the crowd. Devin rested his hand on Joe’s shoulder blade, intending to provide comfort, but it made Joe crack. His sobs came out faster, and he buried his face in Ebony’s hair, his eyes closed, nose running. Over and over under his breath, between the sobs, he said, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
The crowd had been pressing forward, but they all took a step back when Joe and Ebony slipped to their knees.
“We need to organize a search,” Devin said. He didn’t want to be a leader, didn’t want to be looked to, was afraid of most of the people staring at him now. But he needed to do something. All the men and women standing here, they wanted to help. Even if Nina was long gone, the runners needed to feel useful. “How do we organize it?”
“We use a grid search, at least at first.” Flix broke from his brother and stepped into the space between the little group Devin belonged to and the rest of the runners. He watched Joe the whole time he spoke. “Each team spreads out along the street north of the Flats, east to west, each one block apart. We walk a mile north. We come back and walk a mile south. Then we do the same thing east and west to the highway. Then we’ll move on to the next area. We keep quiet and listen for any sounds that could be a baby. If we hear something, we get the group one block over to come check it out with us.”
“That’s smart, junior. It’s a good plan.” Devin smiled at the little asshole and got a trembly smile in return.
“Okay, we need six teams to walk west. The rest of you start walking to the east. Leave one team at each intersection.” Roxy gestured as she spoke, and Devin counted six teams heading toward downtown. The rest set off to the east. Slowly, the street emptied until only Devin, Oliver, Zeke, Ebony, and Joe remained.
“Are you going to be all right, Zeke?” Oliver asked.
Zeke grunted, and Oliver kissed Ebony’s hair and patted Joe’s head. He walked back to the entrance of the building.
Joe and Ebony cried.
Eight
The searches had been fruitless, of course. Joe hadn’t expected anything else. Before and after their runs the past two days, the entire company had scoured a new sector of the city. Flix had hung a huge map in the A runners’ dorm, and he spent all his free time organizing which areas should be checked next and keeping track of the exact areas they’d already looked.
For the time being, the searches kept the runners united, and their unity didn’t threaten Boggs. Joe could cur
l up in a ball and cede control because Devin was safe. And because he had no choice.
He wasn’t the leader anymore.
He was still the A+ runner, the best and the brightest. But he wasn’t the boss. He was Boggs’s whore, his stepmother’s victim, someone to be pitied, maybe, disgusted by, perhaps, but never followed.
In a way, the loss of power was a relief. Trig and Roxy took over handing out Flix’s assignments, talking in low, soothing voices to Zeke and Ebony, smoothing the raw nerves of the company’s rank and file. After his runs and searches, Joe showered and ate, then ducked into his bedroom and locked the door behind him. He read, mostly. The green book about biodomes grew soft and worn from the obsessive way he read it over and over each night.
Devin sat next to him while he read, his hand in Joe’s hair or on his shoulder or around his waist. At first, he’d tried to talk, but when Joe couldn’t muster more than shrugs and grunts, Devin had kissed his temple and fallen silent.
Tonight, they were curled together against the chill in the air, huddled under the blanket, Joe’s legs twisted around Devin’s, his head on Devin’s chest, his hands splayed up under the back of Devin’s shirt. Lights out hadn’t been called. They weren’t kissing or on their way to sex. Joe just needed the comfort, the heat. Maybe Devin did, too.
This was enough, this tight, intense knot he and Devin had tangled themselves in. Joe could be happy like this. He didn’t need leadership or admiration. He didn’t need the others. There were promises to keep, mainly to Devin, and Joe intended to keep them for as long as he could, though his hold on safety and on staying together was slipping away. Even if the runners stayed in line, he’d fallen from Boggs’s favor. One day a replacement, someone as fair-skinned as him, someone as fast, would show up, and Boggs would cut him out of his A+ status, cut him out of Devin’s arms.
Maybe by the time it happened Devin would be so sick of him that it wouldn’t matter.
Joe shrugged to himself, and Devin’s arms tightened around him.
