“Time is of the essence! Now go do what you must and get back here pronto! An hour till show time and our ringleader is off—”
“I’m not in the mood, Raven.” I cut her off with an uncharacteristic show of emotion and she fell silent. I didn’t even bother to see who the person was I grabbed to feed on because the whole time I was satisfying my thirst, I could only think of one thing: Amica tasted so much better.
“That’s enough!” Amica finally snapped as I was close to finishing and I withdrew from my target with an angry flash of my eyes. We glared at each other; him because he was jealous and angry, me because I was still thirsty for something I could not have. “Come on, it’s time to perform.”
Raven was spitting fire as I refused to wear the ridiculous gaudy suit she had prepared for me. I had heard the others snickering as she had shown it to me and I wondered if this was their idea of a joke or something their former ringleader had actually worn. Instead, I pulled on my nicest suit and found a hat suitable for the occasion. Amica was scurrying around in ridiculously confusing circles, preparing and fixing things I didn’t even know needed to be done. I hadn’t spent much time researching circuses; pop culture really didn’t appeal to me, but what he was doing looked fairly interesting. I would look it up later.
“Ready?” Amica mouthed with a pair of headphones pulled over his head. Because he wasn’t up to par, they had switched his performance with an extra bout of gymnastics from the twins and put him on sound check. I picked at the small microphone attached to my shirt for a second before nodding.
“Welcome ladies and gentleman!” I cooed as I walked outside, flourishing my hands and capturing a fair amount of unprepared souls with the first sweep of my hypnotic eyes. “To the Sky Bound Circus!”
On cue Raven came gliding across the ring, the beautiful phoenix costume she was in leaving trails of fire and color. People gasped as she disappeared in a puff of smoke and a fearful cry echoed across the arena. It was exactly what I needed to capture the rest of the audience. One moment of amazed insecurity and their minds were ripe for the taking.
“Be prepared for stunning sights you will never see again, feats that seem almost inhuman, beauty and fear await you in the Sky Bound Circus.” I wove illusions in their minds, sweating a little at the amount of energy I was having to exert to keep them under my control. “First, for your amazement shall be the sisters of good and bad, mistresses of the sky, the trapeze sisters, Dexter and Siniste!”
I left the stage to go back into the shadows and help Nihilo and Raven prepare for their strong man and flying silk dance act they performed together. I helped Raven lift the silk onto the tract that would send it traveling around the arena and made sure Nihilo had all of his weights ready. Once they started I would be able to sit back and watch; my job really wasn’t that important, but I was already impressed before they had even performed. Raven’s silly personality was still full of its flare, but she was working without complain and ridiculously efficiently.
I heard the crowd scream in delight and I peeked out and was shocked to see Dexter spinning straight into the arms of her sister before being launched straight up into the air. She came down hard on the platform across the other side of the trapeze ladders, but went back flipping back off of it, catching the bar with her feet and going spinning right back across to her sister. They really were mistresses of the sky and their wolven costumes only added to the mystique of their flight.
“They’re almost finished, get ready!” Amica called and I prepared to head back out. When the crowd finished cheering and the lights went out, I came sweeping in, using my powers to seem as if I appeared on the back of a giant bat.
“Stunning really, but are they really mistresses of the sky? I think the magnificent lady Raven would contest this or possibly the Buddha made of steel. Let us see if the lady is really a Raven or a daring Phoenix with the earth being shook underneath by a man stronger than Atlas!” I masked their entrance and as they appeared, the crowd gasped at the beauty and flare that Raven had cloaked herself in and at the pure mass of muscle that was Nihilo.
“Able,” Amica gestured towards the canon and I nodded. After their dual performance there was only a few more small performances, Raven flying from the canon, a clown act by Nihilo, Siniste and Dexter performing a sword dance, and our night would be over.
“Able,” Amica nodded and I ran to see what had come unhooked.
I was gasping as we finished out the night and the crowd of students went back to their dorms. I hadn’t realized how taxing Amica’s job as stage manager was until he had drawn me in to help. Everything seemed to go wrong, but everything had to be perfect and fixed by the next performance. I drew Amica away from the crowd begging for autographs, mainly surrounding Raven but also going after the others.
“Able? What are—”
“I want another piece of you before the night ends,” I purred and his face turned pink. “If you’re too tired—”
“No!” He pushed me into our cabin that we now pretty much shared every night.
I touched him like I had never touched him before. I made sure every moment of our time together was full of pleasure for him and when his neck came too close, I struck. He cried out and shuddered as I fed, but I felt tears leak out of my eyes.
“Amica…” I whispered, kissing his hand as we paused for a break. “I love you.”
“Able,” he turned red in the face and tears started leaking out his eyes. “I love you too.”
“Please remember that,” I burrowed my face in his neck, my emotions running away from me. He tried to pry my head up so that he could kiss me, but if I saw his face, it would all be over. “I love you. No matter what happens, know that. You’re the one I want to stand beside, the one I want to share my thoughts with, share my actions, my life with. You’re the one I want.”
“Able, wha—” I didn’t let him finish and we stayed together until the sun rose and my body gave out.
“Able,” I looked up from where I had curled in my blankets and was shocked to find Amica standing and getting dressed. “I’m going to go and play along with their orchestra. It’s not like I have many chances to practice with others. I’ll be back—”
“Amica!” I yelped and struggled out of bed as he fell without provocation to the floor. He struggled to get up, but couldn’t grab his footing. I buzzed for Zuhara O Kande repeatedly and she came storming in. Taking one look at Amica, she left the room only to come back seconds later with some sort of mixture.
“Hold him steady, this tincture isn’t quite ready. If I had more time, I would have waited till the orange reached its prime. What have you done, to make his sickness quicken?” Zuhara O Kande was mostly talking to herself as she forced the thick liquid down Amica’s throat. He jerked in my grip and I nearly lost him as he bucked against me.
“What’s wrong with him?” She looked at me and I nearly snarled. “Don’t you dare say me! I meant what’s wrong with him immediately.”
“It would be lying, if I said he wasn’t dying. His heart has given up, it is riddled with polyps. If his body was his own, the harmful tumors would not have grown. Because you keep him alive, his body will continue to strive. In pain he will remain. I can keep him still, with my tinctures and pills. Yet, he will not be happy, I’m sure you’ll agree. He will be lucky to wake, while his body with fever bakes, before the rise of the next morn’s sun.” Something in Zuhara O Kande’s voice told me that she knew what I was planning to do and didn’t want to upset me even more.
“Leave,” I muttered, holding my now peacefully sleeping lover close to my chest.
“Pain of the heart is like a bomb. Your heart will never again feel quite as calm. But be patient my young prince. Time will your pain rinse.” She stood to leave, but Raven beat her to the door.
“Able, there’s… what—”
“What do you need?” I put my emotionless mask back on and struggled to put Amica into my bed. Zuhara O Kande helped me and Raven
, for once in her life, had the good grace not to say anything.
“There’re some kids outside looking for Amica.”
“I’ll go. I have some things to do before we leave anyway.” I pulled on my clothes and slicked back my hair with Raven just staring, itching to find out what was going on. “Raven, pack up everything. We’re leaving before the sun sets. Get the other’s to help. This is urgent.”
“But Able—”
“Do it!” I nearly yelled and Raven flinched back, looking at Amica.
Suddenly his face turned way too serious and his voice dropped into its male counterpart. “If you do this… you’ll never be able to forgive yourself.”
“I don’t need to forgive myself,” I muttered mostly to myself. “I don’t even need to be happy. I just need him to stay alive, to have a wondrous life even if I’m not in it.”
“Will this really make him happy?”
“You have your orders.”
I met Amica’s friends from yesterday at the door and any hesitation I had was finally crushed. “Oh, hello Able. We were just looking for—”
“Amica,” I nodded and smiled sadly. “He’s sleeping right now. I would wake him for you, but he was really busy last night and—”
“Oh, we understand completely! We’ll come back later.” The arguing group headed back towards the school and I followed, heading towards the Dean’s office.
“Ah, Mr. Able,” he nodded for me to sit as I knocked on the door. “That was a magnificent performance last night. Bravo to you and your crew. That Ms. Raven is quite a fireball isn’t she? Now, what can I do for you this morning?”
“I have a favor to ask of you,” the Dean set down his pen and paper to turn his full attention towards me. Without my hypnotic gaze, it would be only my logic and appeal to reason to convince him to help me.
“Well, let me hear it. If I can and it isn’t of any cost or harm to the school, I would be glad to help you out.”
“It wouldn’t be of any cost to you, quite the contrary.” I made sure the door was closed, never underestimating Amica’s obsession with me. “Do you remember the young boy who is traveling with us?”
“The Skypian born? Yes, I do remember seeing him. Heard he’s quite the cello player.”
“I want to enroll him here.”
“That’s quite a pretty penny—”
“Money is not an issue. When he was in Skypia, he… experienced things that no child should have to and missed out on having a childhood. Since then, he’s been traveling around with our group. As much as we love him… I want him to have a stable life.” I kept my face unmoving and the Dean scratched his chin, thinking.
“We have the room but… Are you sure this is a good idea? Your family is a very close-knit sort I would have to imagine after living on a single train for so long. He may get the wrong idea if you just leave him—”
“He’s sick.” I played my last card and the Dean fell silent. “Because of the stress of having to live on the move and the responsibilities placed on him, he has developed a heart condition. Polyps, I believe our doctor said.” The Dean winced and I felt certain this man truly cared about his students.
“And she has advised…”
“That he settles down somewhere and stops traveling with us.” I pulled out three mythril coins and handed them to the Dean who gasped. “I love him… like my brother and I don’t want him to die for me or for our family. If I could… I would stay here with him or find some nice little cottage and live with him… If things were different… Will this be enough for you to take care of him until he graduates?”
“This will do… plus some. I assume that you would like me to place the remainder of his money in an account for him to access once he graduates?” I nodded and stood.
“We plan to leave at sundown, without him onboard. I don’t plan to tell him. Just… give this to him for me.” I handed the Dean my letter, written with all of my love and my explanation. It wasn’t enough for him to forgive me… but it would give him some solace, if only a little.
“I wish you well Mr. Able.”
“And I you.” Amica was up and Zuhara O Kande was ranting when I got back. He had grabbed his cello and was determined to leave to go play with his friends. As I approached she pointed at him, but instead of siding with her, I gave Amica one last kiss.
“Go and be happy. I love you.” I held his gaze for a second too long.
“I love you too, Able.” Amica ran off to find his friends and I turned to Zuhara O Kande.
“Is everything packed?”
“If you can do this and that was your final kiss, our train is ready to depart, to tear both your hearts apart.” I nodded and went to the engine room.
“Everyone, brace yourselves,” I called over the intercom. “We’re departing.”
The sound of the holotrain coming online was comforting in the normality of its presence. I pressed the necessary coordinates and with a lurch the train took off. I heard the door to the cabin open with dread as the others came rushing in, not understanding what I was doing
“Able! Amica—”
My world grew cold as I looked out the window. He wasn’t supposed to see us leaving, to have to watch us leave him behind. I would never be able to forget the look on his face as he ran across the grass, his friends left behind in confusion.
There wasn’t any confusion on his face; he didn’t think we had forgotten him. He knew we had chosen to leave him. Pain. No anger, no rage… just pain. Then he caught my eye and I managed to see him burst into tears before we rounded a corner and everything disappeared.
“Able! What the hell is going on?” Dexter grabbed me and turned me to look at them, but I didn’t want their company now.
“Amica won’t be joining us.” I tried to leave for my room, but the other’s just wouldn’t shut up and let me grieve in peace.
“He didn’t look like he had chosen to stay!” Dexter growled, looking back out the window. “We have to go back! He’s part of our family.”
“We won’t be going back,” I murmured, locking the controls so they couldn’t turn us around if they tried to without me.
“What do you mean? That’s your lover back there! Have you no heart? How could you do this? What—”
“DON’T!!!” I screamed, my breaking heart bleeding through. They all fell silent and stopped clamoring.
“Amica was sick… H-H-He couldn’t have stayed with us.” I actually stuttered as I nearly broke down and no one said a word. It took me a few more moments to compose myself, but once I had, I gave them the normal spiel as we moved towards our next destination. “We’re continuing on our current path towards the eastern continents. Our exact destination is unknown, but I plan to do some exploring as we continue. If something goes wrong, I’ll be in my cabin.”
And that is how I lost my first love.
On The Edge
“Able, where exactly are you planning to take us?” I glanced at Siniste with disinterest, preferring the silence of the control room and companionship of my computer.
“Africa. We’ll probably stop somewhere in Asia or China first, but we’re going to Africa.”
“Why Africa?”
“Why anywhere else?” I didn’t snap, my voice was filled with only cold logic. “If you have somewhere you want to go, tell me and if it’s not too far off of our path, I’ll redirect our course.”
“Able… I know you’re in pain, you try to hide it, but we’ve been around you long enough to see past your stone-face façade. But that’s no reason to hide alone in the control room! You should talk about it, we’ll listen. We understand why you did what you did—”
“Siniste,” I set down my book and sighed. I turned to look at her, letting annoyance leak onto my face. “I’m not hiding in the control room, the computer is in there. If you want to talk, come find me. As for what happened, I’ve cleared my mind of it.”
“Able… You—”
“Sis,” Dexter came into the r
oom too and I sighed again, setting down my book until they left. “He’s obviously a cold-hearted bastard. Anything you say isn’t going to mean a damn to him. Why waste your time talking to someone like him?”
“Yes, don’t waste either of our time.” I echoed and headed for my cabin.
I sat in silence, reading up on how our train operated before finishing the manual. I sighed and looked at the bed I hadn’t been able to sleep in for days. My back didn’t appreciate the conductor’s chair, but I couldn’t bring myself to touch the empty bunk.
“This isn’t like me.” I finally sighed as I headed back to the control room.
“Nobody in pain is ever the same.” I jumped and my eyes flashed angrily as Zuhara O Kande startled me. She didn’t react to my power, but she at least felt the pull and knew I wasn’t appreciative.
“Calm down, king of the night, I did not come here to fight.” She slunk easily into the chair that was really too small for her and stared out the window.
“Do you need something?”
“No, you do,” she smiled wistfully and muttered something in a language long dead. I shivered at the sound, understanding for the first time the age and power behind her people.
“The name I claim, is a lie at the least.” She laughed and actually smiled, the power behind the expression sending shivers down my spine. “Though those who first used it have been long, long deceased. My people existed long before your people formed from the clouds, large and powerful and infinitely proud. Long before the babies from the earth below grabbed their toys and destruction they did sow. We watched your races spring to life, we gave you solutions to end your strife. Many fell in love, and fell from above. We cried as they died, but happy they had been.”
She looked out the train and seemed to see something that drew a small amethyst tear from her. “I came first to Africa and inevitably became the people’s mama. Many joys and sorrows, from my skill they often borrowed. But that has been many, many years though I can still, for them, I can find tears. I am as old as stars in the sky and many times I have wished to die. Yet in all my years I have never found, someone to match me and my crown.”
Majesty Page 13
