Seeing her now, happiness shining on her face, he knew it would be next to impossible to keep his desire for her in check. In the enclosed space of the dark carriage, the exotic scent of her perfume curled around him. He wanted nothing more than to pull her onto his lap and continue from where they’d left off the last time they’d been alone together.
Catherine had said she needed to speak to him about something Rose Hardwick had told her. He needed to keep his mind on the task at hand if he was to conclude his mission and extricate himself from his current romantic entanglement with Rose.
Catherine leaned forward. “How did you …?” She stopped abruptly and heat crept up her face. “Does Clarington know about us? About what happened?”
Reaching out, he captured one of her hands and shook his head. “I have told no one—you know I wouldn’t speak of what happened between us. Not when everyone must believe I am pursuing Rose Hardwick.”
“The duchess knows about my feelings for you. She might have told him.”
For a moment he expected the worst, but he had to find out just how much Catherine had revealed. “You didn’t tell her—”
“No,” Catherine said with a firm shake of her head. “I promised you I wouldn’t tell anyone about what you are doing. And if anyone knew about that night…” She stopped, pulled her hand from his, and straightened in her seat. “It wouldn’t be prudent for me to expose what happened. I know many would think nothing of trapping a man into offering for them, but I am not one of those women. In any case, we both know you are not free even if I were the type to scheme in such a way.”
Annoyance flared to life within him. Did she really believe he was the type of man to just leave her to suffer from a ruined reputation? His current line of inquiry could go to the devil if anyone learned that he had taken her innocence. Even if she weren’t Louisa’s sister, his sense of honor would never allow him to behave in such a cavalier manner.
Another, more unsettling thought occurred to him. Did Catherine believe he was just trifling with her? He’d had his share of amorous liaisons over the years, but only with experienced women who knew their trysts would go no further. He’d never debauched an innocent, and it bothered him more than he could say that she’d believe him capable of such a thing.
Two lines formed between her brows. “Is something the matter?”
He realized that he was frowning and drew upon his years of practice at concealing his thoughts to smooth out his expression. He refused to consider his suspicion that he was acting more on emotion than intellect, something he could not afford to do until this whole mess was over. Only then could he turn his attention fully to the beguiling creature before him.
“You said you had something important to tell me about your meeting with Miss Hardwick this morning.”
For a moment he thought she wasn’t going to allow him to evade her question, but in the end she didn’t pursue it.
“You won’t be pleased to hear this… it places your investigation at risk.”
“What happened?” he asked, his mind jumping to the worst possible scenario, that he’d tipped his hand that morning when he’d questioned Worthington about his upset the previous night at the theater.
“I didn’t say anything to Rose, but she’s very observant. She’s guessed that I have feelings for you.”
He began to breathe a little easier with her admission. “You haven’t hidden the fact that you have a tendre for me.”
Her shoulders stiffened, telling him that he’d annoyed her, but he couldn’t understand why. From the way everyone acted, her affection for him was widely known. He only hoped that affection wouldn’t turn to someone else before this whole business was behind them.
“That may well be, my lord spymaster extraordinaire, but it will surprise you to know that you haven’t been any more successful in keeping you own feelings hidden.”
That wiped the smile from his face. “What, exactly, are you saying?”
“Rose has guessed that you return my affections.”
His thoughts immediately went back to the previous evening and the way Rose had seemed at ease with him at the theater—more at ease than she’d ever been in his presence—and he realized Catherine was speaking the truth. Not that she’d have any reason to lie to him about such a thing.
He swore and leaned back against the carriage seat as he contemplated the repercussions of Catherine’s revelation.
She rose from her seat and crossed the small space that separated them to sit beside him. He turned his head to look at her and was surprised at the concern in her eyes.
“I promise that I didn’t betray your confidence. She guessed.”
He straightened and reached to take the hand that hovered over his arm. Her hesitation to touch him bothered him more than he wanted to admit.
“I know, Catherine. If you had slipped, you would tell me.”
Her head tilted and even in the darkness he could see that her eyes had brightened.
“You trust me.”
He squeezed her hand in answer. “I’m not happy you’ve embroiled yourself in this, and I still hope to convince you to distance yourself from the Worthingtons, but only because I worry for your safety. I trust you not to reveal anything I’ve told you.”
She shook her head as though unable to believe his words. “Louisa still thinks of me as her baby sister and acts as though she needs to shelter me from the world.”
“Your sister is almost eight years older than you and has looked after you since your mother died in your infancy. She will always see you as her younger sister and will want to protect you. But in case you haven’t noticed, I see you as the beautiful, intelligent young woman you are.”
Their eyes met and held. Kerrick was a hairsbreadth away from pouncing on her when she looked away and said, her voice faint, “There’s more. Rose has decided to play the matchmaker between us.”
“Of course she has.” The entire situation was so ridiculous that he couldn’t hold back a quick bark of laughter. “God save me from romantic females. How am I supposed to continue to pay court to her when she will be trying to throw the two of us together?”
Catherine’s mouth turned up. “It is most decidedly a complication.”
“That, my dear, is a vast understatement.” His amusement died as he realized that he needed to stop allowing himself to be distracted by his affection for Catherine. He had to start paying more attention to his latest—and hopefully his last—mission. “We cannot risk being caught together.”
She released a soft sigh. “I know. And when we attend the same functions, we must be careful to keep our distance. Rose is quite taken with her new plan to see if she can make us a couple.”
Their hands were still joined and he raised them to place a kiss on her palm. Her breath quickened at the intimate caress.
“This might be the last time we’ll be alone together for some time. I will do everything in my power to end this investigation quickly, but these things do not always go according to plan.”
Her tongue darted across her lips and his entire body tightened in response.
“We shouldn’t waste this opportunity,” she said, tracing the line of his jaw with her other hand.
He could no sooner deny the desire to have her in his arms than he could resist the need to draw his next breath. When he grasped her waist to haul her onto his lap, he’d intended to have her sit her sideways, a halfhearted attempt to fool himself into thinking that he was still in control of this encounter. But she would have none of it and surprised him by lifting her dress and moving so that she straddled him.
Their lips were almost touching, and despite the fact that nothing had yet happened between them, they were already breathing heavily.
“You, Miss Evans, are a delightful surprise,” he managed before taking her mouth with his own.
He wanted to take his time to enjoy this moment with her, but at the back of his mind was the ever-present knowledge that this encounter w
ould soon draw to a close. When he’d made arrangements with the Claringtons to have Catherine brought to his carriage, he’d instructed the driver to take a roundabout way to Overlea’s town house. But he hadn’t wanted to risk Catherine’s reputation by prolonging the trip by more than ten minutes, fifteen at most. That didn’t leave much time before this brief interlude would be over.
Catherine must have sensed his urgency, for the desperation of her kiss seemed to match his own. He kept his hands planted on her hips, telling himself he’d have to be content with the feel of her slight weight leaning against him as the mouths and tongues moved together.
The heat that rose in the confined space of the carriage threatened to engulf him. He honestly couldn’t say who moved first, but within moments her body was pressed against the length of his, her legs squeezing against his hips while she pressed intimately against his erection. The soft mewling sounds she made as she rocked against him threatened to drive him to madness.
He couldn’t take her again—they’d already risked too much when she’d spent the night with him—but that didn’t mean he couldn’t give her pleasure.
Gritting his teeth to keep his need to thrust into her in check, he lowered her bodice as she continued to rock against him. Because her décolletage was low, she wore a half-corset below the sky-blue gown. Within moments he’d freed her breasts and drew one tight nipple into his mouth. One hand caressed her breast while the other tightened against her hip. The catch in her voice as she approached her peak had him struggling against the almost overwhelming need to throw her onto her back and bury himself within her.
“Kerrick… oh…”
She froze and he watched her, enthralled, as her orgasm swept over her. On the verge of spilling himself in his trousers like a youth, he planted his hands against her hips and pushed her lower body away from his. She murmured in protest and tried to sink back against him, but he held her lower body firmly at a distance.
She reached down to touch him. He closed his eyes for several seconds while her fingers cradled his shaft, squeezing lightly. A war raged within him. He was on the verge of giving in to his need for her when two loud knocks shattered the moment—his coachman’s signal that they were only two minutes from Overlea’s town house.
Kerrick cursed and shifted Catherine off his lap. When he moved to take the seat opposite her, she gazed at him with dazed befuddlement. Her breasts were still spilling over the top of her dress and her hair had come half down. He groaned and tore his eyes away lest he throw her onto her back and finish what they had started.
“We’ll be at your door soon, and unless you mean to enter the house in that manner, you’d better…” He waved a hand in the direction of her bodice and couldn’t avoid looking at her again.
The warning served to snap Catherine out of her confusion, and in quick order she drew her dress back into place and smoothed down her skirts. She was working on pinning her hair up when he spoke.
“I’m going to call on Miss Hardwick tomorrow afternoon. I’m sure her parents will encourage her to accept a drive with me to Hyde Park.”
Catherine’s hands stilled, but only for a moment. “I think that’s wise. We can only hope her parents are not nearly as observant as Rose, but in case they suspect there is something between us, it will go a long way to cementing your relationship with them if you make a show of seeking her out.”
Her voice was even, but he could almost read her thoughts and knew that she was attempting to mask her hurt. He had never felt more like an unfeeling cad. Sneaking moments with her in the dead of night to take his pleasure with her while openly courting another. In that moment it didn’t matter that she knew his true feelings and motives.
“Catherine—”
“Don’t.” The smile that she aimed at him was brittle. “I understand, truly. And you needn’t fear. I will wait for you.”
It spoke to her true generosity of spirit that she would try to give him a measure of comfort when she herself was hurting.
“I don’t deserve you,” he said as the carriage slowed to a halt.
She reached across and placed a hand on his thigh and his body, still hard with frustrated desire, leapt to life. “Perhaps not, but you have me at any rate.”
The door started to open and she snatched back her hand. As he watched her descend from the carriage with the aid of a footman, a sense of panic settled over him. He wanted to call her back, but of course he didn’t. He’d never counted himself a superstitious man, but in that moment he feared they were both tempting the fates.
Chapter Twelve
Catherine studied the sketch she’d just completed and sighed. This was her third attempt at designing a new garden for the Worthingtons’ town house, and she still wasn’t happy with the results. The layout was nice and the plants she’d chosen were pretty, but overall it was ordinary. Perhaps if she introduced a couple of the plants she’d seen during her outing to Kew Gardens… She sighed again, louder. She couldn’t indulge in that desire. Rose had mentioned that their gardener was older and wouldn’t know how to care for plants that needed special provisions. Would he even bother to dig up the plants that needed to be housed indoors during the cold British winters, or would they be left to die? That uncertainty meant Catherine could only include plants in the design that were hardier. The same plants that were in every other garden in London.
Frustrated, she set the sketch aside and reached for a new piece of paper. Her hand stilled when, out of the corner of her eye, she saw movement. She looked up to see her sister standing in the library’s doorway.
“I wondered where you’d disappeared to,” Louisa said as she entered the room.
Catherine waved a hand over the papers that were spread out over the small desk at which she sat. “I find the morning light in here excellent for drawing.”
Her sister approached and looked down at the various sketches. Her eyes settled on the one Catherine had drawn first.
“I don’t remember the Worthingtons’ garden being this large. Of course, I only glimpsed it through the garden doors during their musicale.”
“I might have gotten carried away with that one,” Catherine said as she moved that page off to the side and handed Louisa the three sketches she’d drawn for Rose. “These are what I’ve drawn for the Worthingtons.”
Catherine didn’t tell her sister that she’d been daydreaming about her perfect garden when she’d worked on that first drawing. It was filled with exotic plants that were completely impractical for the British climate, but with some careful planning and a little extra work, she believed she could achieve a setting that was truly out of the ordinary. She couldn’t give voice to her desire to see that garden come to life on Kerrick’s estate. Like a wish you guarded in your heart after seeing a falling star, she was afraid that to speak it aloud would doom it.
Louisa examined each sketch, shaking her head in wonder. “These are very good. I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ve always admired your skill at drawing, and I think there are few who could rival your interest in gardens and plants. Still, I never imagined you would be able to design something this good.”
Catherine leaned back in her chair. “It’s more difficult than I imagined to bring to life something unique when the space is so limited.”
“Perhaps so, but you’ve made a wonderful start here. I think the Worthingtons will find it hard to choose a favorite.”
Catherine accepted the drawings back from her sister and set them aside. She wouldn’t show them to Rose until she was happy with them. Something was missing, but she would have to think about it later. Right now she could only think about Louisa, who was looking fragile.
Catherine stood and, taking her sister’s hand, led her to the window seat. “You look tired,” she said. “Did you not sleep well last night?”
Louisa sat with a grimace. “I’ve been told the fatigue I’m feeling is normal and that it will pass at some point. I’m not convinced the doctor is telling me the truth.”
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“We’ll stay home tonight.” Catherine felt a pang of regret knowing she’d be giving up an opportunity to see Kerrick if they stayed in that evening, but at the same time it was a relief to know that for one night she wouldn’t have to pretend he was nothing more than a family friend if their paths crossed.
“No.” Louisa gave her head a firm shake. “I was just heading upstairs to have a nap. I’m sure I’ll be more rested tonight.”
“I don’t mind,” Catherine said. “To be honest, I’d enjoy a quiet evening. Life is so different in town than what we are used to.”
“I should insist, but I do agree with you. It is something of a shock after the quiet life we used to lead.”
“John would have hated it,” Catherine said.
“John would have been away at school if he hadn’t enlisted, not attending balls.”
Seeing her sister’s heartache, Catherine reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze. “He doesn’t hate you.”
“You can’t say that with certainty.”
“I can.” She hesitated a moment before deciding to tell her sister about that last conversation she’d had with their brother. “We argued during the ball Nicholas’s grandmother hosted after you were married. He talked about leaving—”
“And you didn’t tell me?”
“I couldn’t. It was your wedding day… I never imagined he’d leave that night.”
Louisa looked away and Catherine could see she still blamed herself.
“He didn’t support your marriage, but John was there that night because he loves you. He could have left before the wedding, but he stayed. I still don’t know why he felt he had to leave.”
Louisa was silent for a moment. “I’m scared we’ll never see him again.” Her hand went to her belly, which was still flat. “That he’ll never meet his niece or nephew and will never learn how happy Nicholas and I are.”
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