by Susan Lewis
She glanced over at Nick. The fact that he was here, taking it all extremely seriously, was as heartening as his arrival, when he’d appeared genuinely concerned and relieved to see that she really hadn’t been harmed. He’d even drawn her into his arms and held her as affectionately as he always did, which she hadn’t attempted to resist, since the issue of two days with no call seemed a petty grievance in the light of what was happening now.
‘So you didn’t tell Laurie anything about the visit?’ he said eventually.
‘No,’ she answered. ‘I couldn’t. She’d just said she needed to get away from London with the wedding coming up, and in the circumstances I could hardly tell her she had to stay.’
‘When is she going?’
‘Next Wednesday or Thursday, I think.’
‘What’s she doing until then?’
‘She didn’t say.’ Her heart was thudding, her mouth turning dry, for it was starting to appear that Laurie’s movements were of more interest to him than what was happening to her.
He lifted his glass and drank. ‘I think you’ll have to back off now,’ he told her. ‘I don’t see any alternative.’
‘You mean just pretend those women don’t exist? Walk away and leave them to their fate?’
‘Laurie’s around for another week,’ he pointed out, ‘then Rose is back. It’s their programme, and if they knew what you were …’
‘Don’t even go there,’ she cut in. ‘I’m not telling Laurie about the visit, or my mother, I don’t want her to know anything.’
He was watching her closely. ‘So you are concerned about your mother?’
Her eyes flashed. ‘Of course I am. How could I not be?’
‘You have no contact with her …’
She turned sharply away. ‘That’s got nothing to do with it,’ she snapped. ‘We’re talking about Laurie, and if she did take back control she’d be facing the same threat.’
‘Not exactly the same.’
‘No. But Eddie Cribbs isn’t going to be any happier about her digging around in his affairs than he is with me.’
Sighing, he pulled a hand over his face and thought some more.
‘Would you like something to eat?’ she offered after a while. ‘I’ve got plenty in.’
‘No, it’s OK. I’m fine.’
‘It’s no trouble,’ she assured him, getting up. ‘I’m hungry myself, so I’ll fix a salad.’
As she began preparing the food he came to stand the other side of the counter. ‘You could always go to the police,’ he suggested.
‘With what? I’ve got nothing to give them until I know where those women are, or I can at least prove they exist.’
‘They’d have to check it out.’
‘Eddie Cribbs is not going to take kindly to having the police swarming all over his business, and it if happens right after one of his henchmen paid me a visit …’
‘Then you should at least put Laurie in the picture.’
Her eyes remained down, masking her annoyance that they were back to Laurie again. ‘No,’ she replied firmly. ‘I think we need to consider this as though she’s already gone to Hydra.’
Turning away he walked over to the windows and stared up-river in the direction of Tower Bridge.
She carried on washing and chopping the salad, throwing it all into a bowl ready to toss. Though she was glad to have his input, and would always value his advice, she’d been hoping he’d offer to take the story on with her. It would be a great grounding for them as a couple, professionally and personally, and she couldn’t imagine for one minute that Rose, when she returned, would object to having him on board. The question was, how to talk him round when he seemed so determined to honour his commitment to his daughter?
Finally she carried two cold chicken salads to the dining table, then went back for the wine. ‘I think we should change the subject now,’ she said, as they sat down. ‘We can sleep on it, see how it looks in the morning.’
He didn’t object, nor, to her relief, did he seem to balk at spending the night.
‘So, what’s been happening with you?’ she asked chattily, draping a napkin across her lap. ‘How’s Julia?’
‘Still loving London. Her mother’s afraid she’ll want to come and live here.’
Sherry’s eyes widened. ‘Is that likely?’ she responded, not liking the idea too much. ‘I mean, would it work?’
‘I don’t think so. I travel such a lot, or I will when I get back to it, but if she set her heart on coming, I guess I’d find a way.’
Sherry picked up her fork and started to eat. Did she want to become the stepmother of a teenage girl? Or share him with an adolescent who was always going to have first call? Not at all, but if it was important to Nick, which obviously it was … No, she still didn’t like it. It would get in the way of their careers, and what if they had children of their own?
‘I think I should tell you,’ he said, picking up his glass, ‘that Laurie already knows about your mother.’
She froze.
His eyes came to hers.
‘How? Who told her?’ she said.
‘I did.’
Her mind was reeling. He’d told Laurie about her mother. He and Laurie had discussed her and her mother. Her appetite had gone, her ability to think was in shreds. Then quite suddenly she shut it down, closed it out, as though it were a blast of music that could just be switched off. ‘It’s OK,’ she said with a brittle smile, ‘you don’t have to explain.’ She didn’t want to hear it. If she didn’t allow him to say the words they wouldn’t exist. And if she didn’t allow herself to form the thoughts, they’d have no power. Everything was all right, he was here, helping her to solve this dilemma … He wasn’t with Laurie, and Laurie was going to Hydra …
Putting down his fork he reached for her hand. ‘You’ve got nothing to be ashamed of,’ he said gently. ‘You don’t need to hide it from people who care …’
‘I just didn’t want anyone to know,’ she responded, pulling her hand away. ‘But it’s all right, it doesn’t matter.’
‘I’m sorry,’ he said.
Sherry drank some wine then continued to eat. She wondered why Laurie hadn’t mentioned it when she’d called earlier, then realized she couldn’t, without admitting she’d heard it from Nick. She wasn’t prepared to think any further than that because she didn’t want to know when Laurie had been with Nick, in case there had been another occasion besides the one she already knew about. Nor did she want to know why they’d been discussing her. It didn’t matter, it really didn’t, so she was just going to let it drop.
‘The first thing I thought,’ she said, gazing at the candle flame, ‘when I saw someone standing there, was that he’d come to take me back to LA.’ She looked at Nick and saw his surprise.
‘You don’t have to go back,’ he reminded her.
‘The curious thing was,’ she continued, almost as though he hadn’t spoken, ‘I realized, when I saw him, that I’d always thought it would be a woman who’d come. I wonder why I thought that.’
‘No-one’s going to come,’ he assured her. ‘Why would they?’
‘Why indeed,’ she said, and gave him a smile.
They continued to eat. Silence wrapped itself around their thoughts, though she knew they were about the same woman – women, because it wasn’t just her mother, it was Laurie too … She felt a peculiar stirring inside as it occurred to her how, all those weeks ago, Laurie’s wedding invitation had turned up in the same mail as what she’d later learned was her mother’s suicide note. The coincidence seemed to be taking on some significance, though in what way it was impossible to say. It was just there, striking her as extremely curious that neither event was going to come to fruition. She considered mentioning it to Nick, but it seemed too sinister, too strange and elusive.
By the time they’d finished eating the rain was coming down fast, bouncing off the balcony and splashing into the room. Nick got up and went to close the windows. The phone rang, and h
earing Barry’s voice Sherry picked it up.
‘Have you spoken to Danny?’ she asked.
‘Yes. Suzy says the women are still here, but she’s having trouble finding out exactly where.’
‘Are you sure she’s on the level?’ she pressed. ‘Or is she just planning to rip us off for more money?’
‘The easy answer to that is don’t pay till you get what you want.’
‘And when’s that likely to be?’
‘Danny reckons by the end of the week. He says something’s about to go down that’ll push Suzy off the fence.’
‘Then let’s hope it does.’
As she rang off she turned to Nick. ‘It seems we could know where the women are as early as this weekend,’ she told him.
His tone was sombre as he said, ‘And what then?’
She shrugged. ‘I’ll try to get in there with a camera.’
‘What about the risk, not just to you and them …’
‘I’ll need an interpreter to come with me,’ she said, cutting him off. ‘Stan might know someone. I’ll call him tomorrow.’ Smiling, she sauntered towards him and linked her hands behind his neck. ‘It’s so cosy with the rain outside and us and the wine in here, don’t you think?’ she murmured.
Though his mouth responded warmly enough to hers she was aware that he wasn’t putting his arms around her. She pressed herself harder to him, and let her head fall back to gaze up into his eyes. ‘You don’t think Eddie Cribbs’ll send another visitor tonight, do you?’ she said, feigning concern.
He shook his head. ‘I doubt it.’
She smiled. ‘Well, even if he does, I’ve got you here to protect me, so I won’t worry too much,’ and after kissing him again she took his hand and led him through to the bedroom.
Chapter Twenty-One
SUZY WAS MADDER than hell. This was absolutely the last time she did her act in this joint. Not for ten thousand quid a pop would she ever work this dive again, with that bitch Cheryl out there gloating over her pathetic little triumph of getting her best friend Marianne put top of the bill.
Well that was OK, let Marianne have the spotlight – why not, she was good, the punters liked her, and not for a minute did Suzy hold any of this against her. Dumb cow, probably didn’t even know she was being used to score points. So no, let her get up there and jiggle it all about for all she was worth. She’d be off again in a few months, up the West End, or to some sleazy men’s club somewhere abroad. They all went in the end, it was only Suzy who’d ever stayed, loyal and true, until that slag Cheryl had come on the scene.
Well, fuck ’em. She didn’t need ’em. She had her special punters, they’d come with her wherever she went, and while she was at it she’d rip off a couple of the other girls to come too. Just no way was she staying here to be humiliated by the likes of that little whore. She was off. Out of here.
As the music ended she peeled off her G-string, twirled it twice and flicked it straight into Cheryl’s face. Everyone laughed and applauded, except Cheryl. After curtseying demurely, Suzy gave a cheeky little wave to her admirers and disappeared behind the screen, the sunniness of her smile turning to an instant thunderstorm.
She was surprised to find the changing room empty, and hoped for Cheryl’s sake that she hadn’t got rid of everyone with the idea of coming back here to rub her face in some more of her shit, because Suzy was just in the mood to deal with her now. In fact, she’d like nothing better than to get hold of that tart’s rat-tail hair and pull every last strand of it out of her stupid fucking head. And that was just for starters, because what she’d like to do to the rest of her had a lot less to do with baldness than with total annihilation. To her disappointment, though, it was Trevor who swaggered in as she pulled open her locker door, and Trevor who made it clear he’d told the other girls to scram.
‘Come on, Suze,’ he said, sinking down on the chair next to her place. ‘Don’t leave like this. Marianne’s not going to last. You know that. You’ll be back on top before you know it.’
‘As long as Eddie’s in that bitch’s knickers,’ she spat, not caring who heard her, ‘there’s no place for me here.’
‘Course there is. You’re just getting things out of perspective. Your pay isn’t being cut. No-one’s interfering with your punters. It’s just Marianne gets top billing. So what? Where’s the big deal?’
‘If you don’t understand, Trevor,’ she snorted, pulling on her jeans, ‘I’m not going to explain. You can dock my pay to the end of the week.’
‘That’s generous considering it’s Friday.’ He waited for her to laugh, but nothing doing. ‘Look, I’m not going to do that,’ he said. ‘What I’m going to do is try and persuade you to stay here and keep us all happy, the way you always have. The place won’t be the same without you.’
‘I’m not closing up shop,’ she informed him tightly. ‘If you still want your nooky, you know where to find me. I just won’t be here no more.’
‘What about my manager’s discount?’ he joked, giving her a wink.
She turned her back, not wanting him to see how much she’d like to slap his face. That was all those bastards ever cared about, where they were going to get it and how much they’d have to pay. They were all the same, whether they married the girl, took her out for dinner, bought her flowers, set her up in a flat somewhere – it was all just variations on the same theme. Well, fuck him, his discount days were over. He could have stood up for her over this, but no-one ever crossed Eddie, did they? God forbid anyone should ever even think about crossing Eddie. Well, it was a pity that slag out there didn’t think about that before she started messing with someone who had ten times more brains, and a lot more friends.
‘Before you go,’ Trevor said, as she started towards the door, ‘Eddie wanted me to tell you not to think about taking any of the punters with you. Or any of the girls. If you do …’ He shrugged. ‘Just don’t do it.’
With the blood boiling in her veins Suzy tore open the door and stormed down the corridor to the back exit. That was it! That was absolutely fucking it! There were so many ways she could get her revenge here and if he was too much of an asshole to see it, then he – and that bitch he was screwing – deserved everything they had coming. And boy were they going to get it now, the pair of them, right where it was going to hurt the most.
Neela was panting for breath and clinging tight to Shaila. Her eyes were wide with terror as she stared at Ekta, whom the other women were holding down. Ekta had lost her mind. Evil spirits had come into her and made her try to smother Shaila with a pillow.
Ekta’s eyes were bright, drool ran from the corner of her mouth. She was looking at Neela. ‘It’s better for her this way,’ she rasped, still trying to get her breath too. ‘They can’t hurt her then.’
Neela continued to stare. She didn’t know what to say, she was too shocked and afraid to move.
‘They came while you were gone,’ Ekta told her. ‘Tell her,’ she implored the others. ‘They took photographs,’ she said to Neela. ‘They made her stand …’ Distress choked off her words. ‘There,’ she said, trying to point. ‘They made her stand there. You know why they did it. We all do. Neela laddali, it’s better for her this way.’
Neela’s gaze moved to the other women’s faces. They were still holding Ekta, but everyone was watching her. To her horror Neela could see they agreed. She should let Ekta do this terrible thing in order to save Shaila from the men.
A single tear rolled from her eye and fell on to her cheek. She thought of what had been done to her that morning. Then her head went back and she let out an animal-like howl of anguish. ‘Madaad karo,’ she cried despairingly. ‘Hamune koi madaad karo.’ Help us. Please, somebody help us.
‘Are you sure you’re all right?’ Anita said, concerned by how distracted Sherry seemed.
‘Yes, I’m fine,’ Sherry answered, dragging her eyes from the window. ‘Sorry. What were you saying?’
‘I was just wondering how it was all going. I haven
’t heard from you in over a week, so I thought I’d come and find out how you are. If it’s not convenient …’
‘No, it’s fine. Everything’s fine.’
Anita waited. ‘So, have you seen Nick?’ she prompted.
‘A couple of days ago.’
‘And?’
‘Have you spoken to Laurie at all?’ Sherry suddenly asked.
Anita frowned in surprise. ‘No. Why would I?’
‘I just wondered, that’s all.’
‘Is she all right?’
‘Yes. I think so. As all right as she can be.’
Anita glanced at her watch. ‘I have to go in a minute,’ she said, ‘but I can meet you for a drink at six, if you’d like to get together.’
‘Oh, no, I can’t. I’ve got too much work on. But thanks.’
After seeing Anita out Sherry returned to her desk and sat staring at nothing. It was late in the afternoon and she had a Dear Molly deadline to meet, but her mind was too full of everything else. She’d have liked to confide in Anita, but it was so hard to know where to get started. Maybe if Anita had asked about her mother … But why would she? As far as Anita was concerned there was no reason to.
Rhona hadn’t mentioned it either when she’d seen her earlier, though surely Laurie would have told her. Except Laurie was so wrapped up in her own life that maybe she hadn’t given Sherry’s mother a second thought. Sherry usually didn’t either, unless she could help it, but since Nick had confessed to telling Laurie all about her, she’d hardly been able to think of anything else.
Her mind went back to three nights ago. He hadn’t wanted to stay, not really, so she’d used his conscience to make him. They’d made love, but he’d only been there in body – in his mind he’d been elsewhere. She had no way of knowing if he’d been thinking of Laurie, or even pretending Sherry was her, but she was afraid he was.
If only Rhona had been able to put on a better show when she’d confronted her, maybe then she wouldn’t be sitting here, frozen in the dread of Laurie and Nick being together even now. But Rhona’s denial just simply hadn’t had the right ring of truth.
