“Finley couldn’t make up her mind what she wanted. Some things have too much fat. Some things have too many calories. And she now thinks she might be coming down with a bean sprout allergy, so most of the menu will be thrown in the trash.”
Finley poured herself a glass of Dr Pepper and hoisted herself onto a bar stool. “I told you last week I totally broke out in a zit after eating bean sprouts. And what does he do?” Finley turned to Lucy for some girl sympathy. “He orders Cantonese Chicken with—”
“With bean sprouts—yes, we got it. I’m the most thoughtless brother in the world.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” she said. “But I doubt Mom and Dad will let me stay with you again.”
“I’m holding back the tears.” Alex looked like he had stepped into a lion’s den and barely made it out. “Do you see what I have to put up with?”
Smiling, Lucy joined Finley at the bar. “What do we have here?” She lifted up a piece of paper filled with instructions for the week.
“My prison rules,” Finley said.
Alex took the stool next to Lucy, swiveling until his knee rested against her thigh. “Directions for the care and feeding of tyrannical sisters.”
“Like you’ve even been home to notice I’m here.”
“I said I was sorry for having to work so late this week.”
Lucy read from the list. “Homework must be done by seven o’clock.”
“AP summer reading,” Finley said. “Lame.”
“Can’t stay out past curfew.”
“Like he’s let me out of the house.”
Number three looked interesting. “No contact with Kyle?”
“That’s her boyfriend.” Alex scrubbed a hand over the light stubble on his face. “Dad’s rule.”
“It’s a stupid one,” Finley mumbled.
“Not if you got caught sneaking out of the house,” Alex said. “The boy is a menace. You don’t need to be hanging out with a guy like that.”
“Like you care.” Seeing her brother’s face, Finley softened her tone. “It’s Friday night. I just want to hang out with my friends. What’s wrong with that? I won’t be anywhere near Kyle.”
Alex shook his head. “We’ve got one more day together. I want to deliver you to Mom and Dad in one piece.”
“I’m bored, Alex. I promise I won’t drive all over town or be somewhere I’m not supposed to. Maybe just a movie with the girls?”
“I’ll take you to a movie.” He was trying, but it was a little too late.
Instead of spouting her special brand of teen venom, Finley quietly shook her head and returned to eating.
Music blasted from a purple phone, and Finley grabbed it. “Hey, Rebecca,” she said. “Uh-huh.” Her face fell even more. “No, I can’t. I know it’s for cheer camp, but my brother won’t let me.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Because I just can’t. I promise I’ll get my part done, and we can practice Monday morning. Yes, it will be enough time. It’ll work out. No, I said I wouldn’t let you down and—” Finley stared at her phone before setting it back down on the counter.
“Did she hang up on you?” Alex asked.
“Yeah.” She pushed some noodles around on her plate. “Rebecca will get over it. We have a competition next week, and she’s just stressed. Nothing new.”
Alex opened up a carton of rice. “What kind of competition are we talking here?”
“It’s the county cheerleading championship. I haven’t gotten to work with my team much this week, and they’re meeting tonight. Again.”
“Finley—”
“No, don’t worry about it.” She took her plate to the sink and washed it out. “I’m going up to bed to watch some TV.” She walked past them and through the door.
Alex sighed like a resigned parent. “Okay.”
She did an about-face and leaned back into the kitchen. “Did you just say something?”
“I said you can go to Rebecca’s.”
“No, don’t worry about it. I’ll just get with them on Monday before practice.”
“I’m not here to be the bad guy, Finley. And I’m certainly not going to be the one to take away your championship title.” Alex stood and aimed a finger toward his sister. “Be back before eleven or I call the National Guard.”
“Wow.” She just stood there. “Thanks.”
“Don’t make me regret it.”
“Finley left her phone,” Alex said as he and Lucy retired to the living room. “She’ll probably go into withdrawal before she even gets to Rebecca’s.” He sat down on the couch and tugged her down beside him, loving the warmth of her hand in his. “What’s that look for?”
“I can’t believe you just fell for that.”
“What?” Lucy Wiltshire was a sight for sore eyes. They’d seen little of each other lately. When they’d been together, Lucy had kept it all business, and he hadn’t pushed. But now they were going to sit down and have a real conversation. Then make out like teenagers.
“Your sister totally just played you.”
“She did not. If anyone is familiar with teenage hijinks, I’m pretty sure it’s me. My sister is on her way to Rebecca’s to save the world with their cheerleading.”
“She’s going to Kyle’s.”
Alex blinked. “She wouldn’t do that to me. No way.”
“She’s been ticked at you for months. Of course she would.”
His sister had been playing the ice queen all week. He knew she was upset with him. Ever since Will’s disappearance, she had treated Alex like he wasn’t cool enough to share the same last name. But he couldn’t believe she would sneak out. She respected him more than that.
Lucy snaked her hand around him, reached into his back pocket, and pulled out his phone. “You’re a man with resources. Make some calls and find out where this Kyle lives.”
“I know I’m right, Lucy.”
“Fine. Then let’s prove it.”
Chapter Thirty-nine
I feel like a perv.”
How had he let Lucy talk him into staking out Kyle’s house?
Only idiots and creeps did stuff like this, and yet here Alex sat. If Finley hadn’t left her phone, this could’ve been taken care of with a quick call. His legs ached to be stretched after two hours in the confines of his car.
Lucy stared out the window, still and silent. And he didn’t like it. Somewhere they had derailed a little. Gone in reverse.
“I don’t stalk people.” He was getting grumpy and restless in this car. She could at least talk to him. “Especially my little sister.”
Drumming his hands on the tops of his thighs, he let her know he was bored. And bored men had few thoughts other than—
“You want to hop in the back seat?”
In the dark of his Mercedes, Lucy finally smiled. “I would, but I already have a crick in my neck.”
His frazzled sigh filled the car. They sat there a few more moments, four vehicles down from Kyle Mulroney’s two-story home. The rain had started up again, and it tapped lightly on the windows.
Alex picked up her hand from her lap and toyed with her fingers, enjoying the contrast of her soft skin against his. “Lucy?”
“Yes?”
He kissed her knuckles then stared at her over the top of her hand. “I’m sorry for our fight on the Fourth.”
“That was two weeks ago.”
He nodded, feeling a little off-balance. “And you haven’t been the same since.”
“Of course I have. I’ve just been—”
“Making excuses,” he said. “Finding reasons to stay out of my way. Reasons not to talk to me unless it’s about the campaign.” He leaned closer and his senses filled with her. “Call me crazy, but I thought we were better friends than that.”
“Friends.” She paused just long enough to make him wary. “Yes, we are.”
“Then you could at least pick up the phone occasionally. Or man up and tell me why you’re still mad.” He glanced away at the expectation in h
er eyes. He wasn’t used to explaining himself to anyone. But this was Lucy. His Lucy. And she wanted answers. “Kat . . . is a private detective,” he finally said. “She works for the top firm in the country. I hired her a week after Will disappeared, when the government’s search for him didn’t progress as fast as I thought it should.”
Her face softened. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because it all sounded so hopeless. The chances of Will being alive were slim, and then when the news broke that he was dead—I knew you’d think I was crazy.”
“I don’t think you’re crazy.” She was looking at him with those sympathetic eyes again. “I think you’re a man who loves your brother.”
“I just”—he took a shuddering breath—“couldn’t give up.” Organizing his own search had made him feel less helpless, but now it just seemed pathetic.
“He’s gone, Alex.”
He nodded as the words barreled through him. “I know.” And it made Alex’s resolve to win the election stronger than ever. He would win this. For Will. He would build a life his brother would’ve been proud of. Carry on his work.
“I need you in my life, Lucy.” His fingers trailed along the line of her jaw. One side then to the other, a lazy caress of the skin. She leaned toward his hand, kissed his palm. Tipping her chin up, he pressed his lips to hers.
He had a plan, but it could be altered a bit. Marriage was still light-years away, but he didn’t see why they had to break up when the election was over. He could be flexible.
Lucy pulled away. “So what are you saying?”
Something dangerous glinted in her eyes, and it set him on edge. “I’m saying I like what we have here.”
“And what is that?”
“I just think—”
“I don’t care what you think,” she said. “What do you feel for me?”
He was standing over the edge of a canyon, held by nothing but balance. To love Lucy would be to give up his timeline, his plans. She hated everything about his political life. She’d never make it. He could never marry someone like that, a woman who couldn’t fit into his dream.
“Never mind.” Her voice was a whisper in the darkness.
And he had just fumbled. “Lucy—”
Lights illuminated the car as a truck drove down the street and wheeled into the driveway of Kyle Mulroney’s house.
“We’re not done with this conversation.” Alex straightened in his seat and stared down his new target. “Not by a long shot.” He switched on his windshield wipers to clear the view as a lanky teen boy stepped out of the Ford and opened the passenger door.
Out climbed his sister.
“I’m gonna kill that kid.” Alex reached for the handle. “I’m going to rip him apart. And then I’m going to feed my sister bean sprouts until she breaks out in zits all over that lying face.” His door bounced on its hinges as he swung it wide. “Finley!” he yelled. The rain pelted his skin, but he didn’t even notice through the red haze of anger.
She turned, holding an umbrella over her head. “What are you doing here?”
He closed in on the sneaking couple. “I thought you might need help with your cheer routine.” He took in the boy beside her. “You must be Rebecca.”
“Leave him alone,” Finley said.
“Dude, we weren’t doing anything wrong.”
Alex looked at Kyle like he was standing in the way of him and the end zone. “Dude, your breathing right now is all wrong to me. I suggest you take your little Abercrombie-wearing self into your house and lock your door. Because after I get through talking to my sister, I’m liable to come after you. And I’ll be all done with talking.”
Kyle leaned toward Finley.
“Kiss her.” Alex said. “I dare you.”
Looking at a force he couldn’t contend with, Kyle mumbled an apology to Finley, then ran into his house.
“You are such a jerk.”
“Call me whatever you want.” The rain seeped into Alex’s clothes, but he hardly felt it. “You lied to me.”
“Who cares!” she cried.
“I do!” he shouted back. “You’re my baby sister.”
“Don’t stand there and pretend like you give a crap. You haven’t said five words to me in the last year.”
“We talk all the time.”
“Yeah, a text here. An e-mail there. You didn’t even show up for my birthday last month.”
“I was busy.” He raised his voice over the growing wind. “I sent you a big gift card to the mall.”
She tossed her hands in the air. “I don’t want your money. I want my brother back!”
That stopped him. “Get in the car, Finley. We’ll talk about this at home.”
“No.”
He groaned as he saw her lips tremble. A woman’s tears were going to be the death of him. “Get in the car.”
“No!” The wind howled over them, knocking the umbrella right out of her hand. She spun on her brother. “I hate you! Do you get that? I despise you.”
“Don’t say that.” Rain dripped in his eyes, and he dug in the pocket of his jacket for a tissue. Anything. His hands closed over something, and he pulled it out.
The pieces of paper he had scribbled on during Chuck’s sermon.
Failure.
Guilty.
He felt all of those things tonight. While Lucy had nailed hers to the cross, Alex had stuffed his in his coat like the weak man he was. “I’m sorry, Finley,” he said. “For whatever I’ve done.”
“You don’t even know, do you?”
This was pretty much how his life went anymore. “Tell me.” So they could get out of the rain. So he could just fix it. And fix whatever Lucy’s problem was. He wanted to see his sister look at him like he was her hero again. And not her biggest disappointment.
“Will died.”
The words ripped into his flesh and bone. “I know.”
“He died, and you didn’t even care.”
“Of course I did.” He was eaten up with it. It was a consuming plague on his spirit. “I loved him too.”
“I needed you.” Her hair clung to her face. “One of us is gone, and you couldn’t be bothered with it. I was all by myself. I lost two brothers.”
“That’s not true.”
“You were too busy with football. Then when you quit, you just went on to something else. I didn’t have anyone to talk to. Nobody to share Will stories with. He’s gone.” Her body shook with sobs as she sunk to the pavement, her hands covering her face. “Will is gone.”
“Hey.” Alex dropped down beside her. He peeled the hair from her eyes and pulled her to his drenched chest. Lucy still sat in his passenger seat, and he wondered what she would tell Finley right now. God, give me the words. I’m a desperate man.
“You left me.” She curled into him, jerking with the force of her tears. “How could you do that?”
“I don’t know.”
Failure.
Guilty.
Lies he hadn’t been strong enough to leave behind.
God, just take them. I can’t live under this anymore. I’m giving them to you.
“I was hurting too.” The truth peeled from his lips, stinging like a scab ripped away. “I felt guilty, okay?” How could he possibly make this seventeen-year-old girl understand? “Like I should’ve been the one taken. Instead of Will.”
“Neither one of you should have been.”
“I know. And it’s not fair. And the worst thing is that I bailed when you needed me most.” Money had been the cruelest of tormenters. He’d never been more useless in his entire life. “I just wanted to fix it for you, and there was nothing I could do.”
Eyes so much like his stared back at him. “I wanted my family around me. Someone to listen to me—who understood what I’d lost.”
He had been such an idiot. His family had never done anything but love him. And he had pushed them away, pouring salt on their gaping wounds. “I want to be your brother again.” His fingers held ti
ght to her arms. “A real one. It’s not too late.”
“Are you going to visit more?”
“Yes.”
“You’ll come over for Sunday dinner?”
He hated his mother’s meatloaf. “I’ll make it a priority.”
The rain couldn’t wash away the hope on her face. “I’ve missed you, big brother.”
He crushed her to him. “I’m not going anywhere again. I promise.” He was leaving the guilt there in the driveway. It was time he rejoined the family. People who would take him just as he was—if he would only let them.
“Are you still going to beat up Kyle?”
There was only so much giving a man could do. “No, of course not.” With his arm wrapped around her, Alex led Finley to the car. “I wouldn’t dream of taking away Dad’s fun.”
Chapter Forty
The harpist played “Yoda’s Theme” from Empire Strikes Back.
From the changing room in the chapel, Lucy could hear the rumble of wedding guests, the three-string band, and her friend Sanjay ordering guests to sign the book.
“Can you just go check on Chuck?” Morgan said. “I know he’s nervous, and I need to see if he’s okay.”
“He loves you.” Lucy smiled at her friend. Chuck wasn’t the only one nervous. “He’s fine.”
The bride planted a fist on her hip and pointed to the door. “I’m about three seconds away from going Bridezilla on you.”
“On my way.”
Lucy crossed the hall, knocked, and slipped into the small room where Chuck waited.
“I’m here to make sure you’re not crawling out the window and making your escape.”
Chuck glanced to the tiny porthole in the wall behind him. “Not much chance of that.”
“You look quite dapper.” Lucy reached out and brushed some lint from his jacket.
He smiled. “You look all right yourself.”
Lucy looked more than all right. She was radiant in a red chiffon dress with a ruched bodice and a skirt that grazed the bottom of her knee. Clare would be proud of Lucy’s updo, though the twin roses pinned at the side gave it the sass that was all her own.
Concealer hid the dark circles under her eyes. She had lain awake all night. Thinking. Praying. And eating Julian’s mocha chocolate cheesecake. Today was the day she saw her best friends get married. And a day of decisions for her.
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