by J. J. Murray
"Why not?"
"Cuz it ain't right."
"Girl, this about the juiciest gossip I've ever heard. There's gonna be a showdown at a wedding. That is some juicy shit, and you want me to keep quiet about it? I have a reputation to preserve. If it gets out that I held this shit back, folks will stop comin' by. This is my establishment, and I own any and all gossip told here. I have a right to tell it all, Ruth"
"Just this once, girl, keep it to yourself. Please. If Jonas finds out, there'll be hell to pay."
"She got that right," Mrs. Simpson says in a deep, gravelly voice.
I blink at Mrs. Simpson. I have never heard her speak before. "And I won't be able to get my revenge," I plead.
"That's right," Mrs. Simpson says with a nod.
"How come you speakin' all of a sudden, Mrs. Simpson?" Diana asks.
"I finally got something to say," Mrs. Simpson says. "I been invited to that wedding, and for once, I'm actually gonna pay attention. Might even sit down front, bring me some popcorn to throw at that preacher." She winks at me. "Kick his ass, Ruth Childress. Kick that two-timin' faggot's ass"
After Mrs. Simpson leaves Diana with a dollar tip (Diana says she's gonna get the dollar framed), Tonya rolls in for a wash and perm. She ain't in here for that either, but I don't mind. I have to tell someone how magical last night was.
"You got some, right?" she asks as I wet her hair in the sink.
"How you know I got some?"
"You wearin' a damn turtleneck, that's why. He tear your shit up or what?"
"I might just be wearin' a turtleneck cuz it's cold as shit outside."
"Right. You got you some"
"Shh," I say. "We on gossip lock-down today."
"Why?"
"Swear you won't tell another living soul first."
"I swear."
"Cross your heart or something." She draws an X on her chest. "I'm playin' at Jonas's wedding."
She blinks. "No shit?"
"No shit." I smile.
"Daa-em. I'm gonna be there"
"Good"
She stares at me for the longest time. "And I know you got you some. You lookin' like you been callin' out Jesus's name all night."
"I did."
"You did?"
"Yesssssss" I massage in some shampoo. "And you can't " be tellin' no one that either. Especially Naomi."
"I won't." She giggles. "I'm so happy for you. Was he good?"
I nod. "So good I cried, girl."
"Oh shit. That's good. That's real good" She chews on her bottom lip. "His mama know?"
"Uh-huh, but I got it handled. She ain't gonna be a problem." I hope. I rinse out the shampoo. "Dewey even called me this morning."
"He did?"
14yep.
She frowns. "No man ever did that for me. Course, I ain't never done that for no man either. He's gettin' serious then, huh?"
"Yep. And we got us a real date tomorrow night."
"Y'all goin' out?"
I squeeze the water out of her hair. "The kids are goin', too. Be kind of like a family outing."
I wrap a towel around her head, and she sits up. "Everything's comin' together, huh?"
"Yep" Should I tell her the next part? I have to. "And ... I might be gettin' me a ring."
Her eyes become little soup bowls. "A ... ring?"
"Yep >,
She sighs. "Daa-em. Can I be your maid of honor?"
I help her out of the chair and get a little misty. "You're my only choice, Tonya"
She hugs me. "Thank you" She hugs me again a little longer. "Girl, you got you some huggable titties."
"Say what?"
She hugs me again. "Wish I had me some of these. They the kind that makes a man wanna come to mama"
I push her away, spin her around, and point at my chair. "Get your little ass in that chair, girl. And don't you say a damn thing about what I told you"
For the rest of the afternoon and all day Friday, Diana's is the quietest hair salon on planet Earth, so quiet that I think some of our customers must know something's goin' down. I can see it in their raised eyebrows and darting eyes, hear it in their hurried whispers, feel it in their warm hands as they overtip me. No one talks bad about no one, no one talks about the wedding, no one talks about the miserable rainy weather outside, no one talks about their upcoming plans for Halloween, Thanksgiving, or Christmas, no one even talks about the vote at Antioch on Sunday, something I had almost completely forgotten about. I've just been so busy that I haven't had time to think about it. God has certainly filled my calendar this week. Yet the chairs are full all day Friday. We even get a few new customers, refugees from Nubian Designs, who sit and listen ... to absolutely nothing since Kevin has a doctor's appointment.
Once we're down to one customer waiting, I leave Diana's at quarter to six to prepare for my date. There's no need to change, and when six o'clock becomes six-thirty, there's no need to hurry. I play with my hair some but decide to let it go its own way. "Lookin' kinda wild," I whisper to the woman in the mirror. "You must have got yourself some"
A little after seven, I hear a tiny little rapping on my door. "Who is it?" I call out.
I hear a giggle.
I get my coat and stand by the door. "Is it the po-lice?"
I hear two giggles.
"Hmm. I know who it is!" I throw open the door and see Tee and Dee, each holding a rose out to me. I squat and look at foul; not two, beautiful flowers. "Those are beautiful. Are they for me?"
Dee nods and hands me his. Tee doesn't look so sure. She wants a rose from her daddy, too.
I slide my rose into a button hole on my coat. "I only need one, Tee. You can have that one"
She smiles. "Thanks!"
We walk out to the truck where Dewey has the door open for us. I help Tee and Dee get in and kiss Dewey's cheek before I slide in. "Thanks for the rose"
"You're welcome."
We ride out to the county to Race 'n' Play, an indoor gokart and video palace set up in an old warehouse. As soon as we hit the door and Dewey gets ten dollars' worth of tokens, Tee and Dee disappear, their pants pockets jingling. Dewey orders a pizza and drinks, we find an empty table between Ski-Bol and some basketball-shooting game, and we sit.
And say absolutely nothing.
And it doesn't bother me one bit. We watch Tee and Dee flitting from game to game and smile a lot. Two nights ago we made love, and today we're shy. Damn, we're cute. When the pizza arrives, Tee and Dee materialize, devour several slices, and vanish again.
This place is real cheap daycare.
"Gonna ride the go-karts with us, Ruth?"
I had tried years ago on an outing for the youth group at Antioch when Race 'n' Play had first opened, but I couldn't squeeze into the go-kart. "Maybe"
"Maybe? They're a blast! Dee can't stop talkin' 'bout how you and him are gonna whip our tails."
"I've never driven a go-kart"
He leans closer. "It's the same as drivin' a car."
"Never driven one of those either."
He sits back. "You're kiddin'."
"No" Neither Mama nor Grandma owned a car, and I've never had enough money for one myself.
"Never?"
I shake my head. "You gonna have to teach me"
"I'll take you out for a lesson at the farm tomorrow."
I lick my lower lip like Tonya does. "What kind of lesson, Mr. Baxter?"
He turns red. "A drivin' lesson."
"Ooh, I like it when you talk dirty."
He laughs. "A drivin' lesson. In the truck"
"Ooh, boy, you makin' me hot," I whisper. "We gonna do it in the front seat or on the bed? Cuz if it's on the bed, you gotta bring me a blanket." "
"I'll ... make sure you have a blanket."
Whew, it's gettin' hot up in here!
Dee returns with a pout, bouncing his little chest off Dewey's knee. "I need more money, Daddy," he says, and he shows Dewey his empty pockets for proof.
"Why don't w
e ride the go-karts now?" Dewey asks.
"Yeah!"
"Go find your sister and meet us at the track," Dewey says. Dee runs off as Dewey stands. "You goin'?"
I guess" I groan and stand. "I ain't promisin' nothin', now. You got insurance on Dee?"
"Yes" We walk toward the track. "And you can't get hurt. They're built so they don't tip over."
Like me.
Tee and Dee join us in line, Dewey pays the man ten dollars, and after squeezing into the go-kart, I am holding on to the wheel of a vehicle for the first time in my life, Dee strapped in beside me, my knees squashed up to my titties.
"Go real fast, Penny!" Dee shouts.
"I'll try," I say. Lord, keep us alive, please. I don't know what I'm doin'.
I can't see the pedals at my feet, but I figure them out soon enough. The right one shoots us forward with a snap, the left one stops us with a slide. Steering the go-kart is kinda tough, but I manage to get us in line behind Dewey and Tee.
"We gonna stomp y'all!" Tee yells.
"No you ain't!" Dee yells back.
A light at the start line changes from red to orange to green, and we're off. Sort of. I get confused and hit the brake instead of the accelerator, and the go-kart behind us bounces into the back of our go-kart. I press the right pedal, and in no time, we're roaring down the track ... straight into a bunch of rubber tires.
"You forgot to turn, Penny!" Dee yells between giggles.
"Oops "'
One of the attendants comes over and pulls the front end of the go-kart free. "Start your turn 'bout halfway down the straightaway."
"Okay."
When we finally get rolling again, we are way behind Dewey and Tee, and after a few shaky laps, I'm gettin' the hang of this thing. Driving ain't as hard as I thought it would be, and I even drive one-handed for a spell, the smoky air blowing through my hair. Dee keeps whipping his head from one side to the other looking for his daddy, but I know we'll never catch him. "They're gonna win!"
"Only this time," I yell in his ear. "Once I get more practice, we're gonna smoke 'em ""
"I wanted to win this time!"
After twenty laps or so, the go-karts stop by themselves. I get out and unbuckle Dee, who runs to catch up with Dewey and Tee. Little boy's mad at his Penny. I'll have to teach him about losing the right way. I have a degree in that.
Tee and Dee play Ski-Bol for the rest of the evening till Dewey's wallet is empty. They take their tickets to this little booth and get cheap little toys, but they hold those toys like they're the best presents they ever got. Dee picks out a detective's kit complete with magnifying glass and badge, while Tee gets a bunch of rubber critters all designed to scare the bejeezus out of someone.
She will not be allowed to take these critters to school.
Instead of taking me home, we ride to Dewey's apartment where we sit on the couch in front of that little TV and watch some silly cop show till both children are purring away, Dee fast asleep and clutching my neck, Tee snoring and laid out on Dewey's lap. Dewey nods toward the bunk bed, and we carry them across the room, tucking them in for the night.
Then we go back to the couch ... and don't watch the eleven o' clock news or The Tonight Show or even some old reruns of M*A*S*H because we are far too busy swapping hands and squeezing flesh.
"How you sleep on this?" I ask between deep soul kisses.
"Badly," he whispers. "I've missed you for the last two days"
"I've missed you, too"
We're halfway into a wonderfully wicked position when I look over and see both children sitting up in bed. I pick Dewey's head off my chest and turn his head toward the bed.
"Go to sleep, y'all," he says.
Tee slumps back to her mattress, but Dee turns on his side and wraps his covers over his head, his little forehead and eyes visible.
"Dee, go to sleep," Dewey says.
"He's just curious," I whisper. "And I really should go" I can't be doin' this with the children watching anyway. "When y'all comin' to get me?"
Dewey pulls my sweater down and sits up. "A little before sunrise."
"Dag," I say, "that's only in a few hours"
"Yup
I snuggle up next to him. "Maybe I should just stay, huh?"
"Yeah"
"But no grindin'," I whisper. "I don't want to put that child back into therapy."
"Neither do I"
For the rest of the night, Dewey holds me, snoring softly in my ear, while Dee and I make faces at each other.
`twenty-`two
The next morning, Dewey rushes us out the door, the kids still asleep, me still dreaming about elephants. No breakfast, no brushing teeth, no washing faces, just let's get on out the door. "What is the rush, Dewey?" I ask.
"We gotta get there before Mama leaves."
"Where she goin' on a Saturday morning?"
"The farmer's market at Pine."
"Oh" Where else do farmers go? "Well, at least let the kids brush their teeth or something."
"No time."
Tee and Dee wake only briefly out in the cold but fall back to their purring as Dewey races away from Vine Street to some country road I have never been on before. "This will take us most of the way there. Might want to put on your seat belt cuz it's a real curvy road."
He isn't kidding about that, and I'm glad I haven't eaten. Country roads are about as straight as a snake, with sudden hills and hairpin turns thrown in. We are definitely not in the city anymore. Forests, fields, and dirt fly past us in the mist. We've only been traveling for twenty minutes or so when he slows to a crawl and takes this muddy gravel road through what looks like an apple orchard guarded by gray board fences.
"Are we there yet?" I ask.
"Yup," Dewey says, shifting into four-wheel drive. "This here's our truck farm"
"Your what?"
"Mama runs a truck farm."
"What does that mean?"
"Means we grow strawberries, raspberries, blackberries if we have a wet spring. You saw the apple orchard. We even got a hive for honey, and we sell it all up in Pine on Saturday mornings at the farmer's market"
"You do all that and only sell it one day a week?"
11yup "
That don't sound right. "Y'all make any money?"
"Enough. Land and house are paid for, the truck, too. Taxes are pretty low, and Mama don't need much else."
We bump over some ruts, and Tee and Dee wake up. "Y'all ought to pave this road"
"It ain't a road, Ruth. It's our driveway."
Daa-em. A driveway as long as Vine Street? "Then, y'all ought to pave your driveway."
Dewey stops the truck in front of what looks like an old railroad tie, and a farmhouse with a wide rocking-chair porch breaks through the fog in front of us. It has a single front door, two wide windows on either side, and real shutters that close up on all the windows. It looks like a Vine Street four-square, only it's plainer with fewer windows on the second story and a tin and tar-paper roof instead of shingles.
"This is where you grew up?"
"Yup"
Dag, Dewey must have been lonely.
Tee and Dee crawl over me and disappear into the fog to our left. "Where are they goin'?"
"To see Myron"
"Who?"
"Myron, Mama's pet pig. Wanna meet him? He's practically tame, knows his name and everything."
How nice. "I'm stayin' away from pork, thanks, and I don't want no pig near me that knows his own name" He might get sweet on me or something. I get out and stretch my back. Dewey's gotta get us a real bed, like a king size. Two big people should never sleep spooning on a love seat sleeper sofa. Surprised I didn't fall off. Least he doesn't snore. "Where's your mama?"
"Probably loadin' up her truck over at the barn" He takes my hand. "Come on"
We walk for about fifty yards on a narrow muddy path, huge pine trees shooting up around us, until a faded red barn appears out of the mist. I see Nanna's old dented truck jutting out, its shor
t bed loaded with boxes, Nanna tying down a blue tarp over the bed.
"Mornin', Mama," Dewey calls out.
Nanna takes a short look at us and continues tying. Bet you never expected to see me here, Nanna. I look down at my hand and still see Dewey's hand in mine. And I bet you never expected to see your son holding my hand.
"You need any help today, Mama? Truck looks pretty full. Gonna be a clear day once this fog lifts, probably have a nice turnout"
"I don't need no help," Nanna says. "Been doin' it for forty years. What I need help today for?"
Dewey squeezes my hand. "What?" I whisper.
"Why don't you help her?"
Say what? "She said she don't need any." And I don't want to. I aim to climb me a tree today.
"Ain't polite to whisper," Nanna says. She ties down the last corner. "See y'all at lunchtime."
Dewey looks hard at me, nodding his head toward the truck. Oh. I get it. We rushed here so I could rush off to make nice with Nanna. Like that's gonna work. I walk over to her anyway. "Mrs. Baxter, I'd like to go with you"
"You would?"
"Yes"
"What for?"
To get to know you, to let you get to know your future daughter-in-law, to get you to be less hateful to me. "To help"
"Don't need it and don't want it."
"Then ... Let me tag along. I won't get in the way."
Nanna shoots a look past me to Dewey, then attempts to stare a hole in my head. "You can't make me like you," she whispers.
"It ain't polite to whisper, and I ain't tryin' to get you to like me"
"Bullshit"
"Really. I'm just tryin' to get you to respect me"
Nanna chews on her cheek, and her staring eyes wander to my feet. "It ain't gonna be no fun"
Don't I know it. "I got nothin' better to do"
"Hmm" She nods her head. "Get in. Let's get there so we can get back"
I wave at Dewey, he winks, and I get into the truck. Lord, I don't know where all this is leadin', but I am in Your hands. Help this woman warm up to me, and keep my tongue as quiet as this ride's probably gonna be.
We bump and lurch out to the road, go up the road a piece, crawl over some train tracks, creep up a long hill, and take a right onto a cart-path driveway. Ain't no one in the country got a paved driveway? My back is killing me!
