by Vikki Vaught
“I would be happy to do that.”
They spent the next couple of hours with her husband listening and her playing. Since the weather was a bit inclement, they had to forgo their evening visit to Rosebud and the walk on the beach. At ten o’clock, they went upstairs, where Andrew made love to her into the wee hours of the morning, taking her with such intensity it left her weaker than a newborn kitten. As she lay sated in his arms, Kathleen fell asleep, luxuriating in the wonderful feel of his arms tightly wrapped around her.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Andrew found married life much more enjoyable than he had expected. Kathleen was every bit as passionate as he’d suspected she would be. She was adventurous in bed, always willing to try something new. His new wife was also wonderful with his tenants. Already, she’d started getting involved with the vicar, having volunteered to be on one the committees to help the less fortunate of the parish. It pleased him that she had such a caring heart.
His affection for his wife grew each day, and he always enjoyed his time with her. Yes, life was good. He even looked forward to the day when they would start a family. Not too soon though; he wanted Kathleen to himself for a while.
That afternoon, Masters came to him in his study. “I’m sorry to disturb you, my lord. You have a visitor.”
Andrew looked up from his reports. “Who is it, Masters? I’m not expecting anyone. If it’s not someone I know, tell them I’m not available.”
“My lord,” Masters hesitated, “the woman told me to tell you it’s important. Sir, she has an infant with her. She’s very insistent. Here’s a letter she wants you to read. She says it will explain why she has come.”
He took the letter from his butler. The handwriting on the outside looked vaguely familiar. He couldn’t remember who it belonged to though. He almost decided to hand it back to Masters, then curiosity got the better of him and he opened it. When he looked at the signature, he was shocked. Arlene had stopped writing to him last year, shortly after their liaison ended. Why would she be writing to him now?
Dear Andrew,
By the time you read this letter, I shall have departed this life. I am dying of consumption and the doctor only gives me a week to live. I am sending your daughter to you with her wet nurse, Matilda. Shortly after you so callously sent me from your life, I discovered I was with child. I sent you several letters. Since you never answered me, I gave up and made do. Arianna was born on the thirtieth of October last year.
You will find a birthmark on her right shoulder that exactly matches the one on yours. You told me that all the members on your father’s side of the family have this mark. I promise you, she is your daughter. She has your coloring and eyes. Please accept her. I beg you to have compassion. Arianna is an innocent child and does not deserve to be sent to an orphanage, which is where she will end up, since the money you gave me is long gone.
I am fading fast and can write no more. I pray you do not turn your back on our child. I know you considered me beneath you, but I loved you anyway. Good-bye, my love.
Always,
Arlene
The letter dropped from his hands.
What a cold-hearted bastard I was.
He remembered receiving several letters from Arlene. Because he wanted nothing more to do with her, he had pitched them in the fire without opening them.
Could this child really be his?
Oh, Lord, I pray not.
But if she had the birthmark, she would definitely be his.
How would he ever explain this to Kathleen? Just when everything looked so promising for them, she would surely hate him for this. Before it went any further, he needed to see if the child could possibly be his.
Schooling his features to hide the turmoil churning in his stomach, he said, “Show the woman in. I shall see her and the child. Please see that we are not disturbed until I summon you.”
While he waited for Masters to bring in the woman, he agonized over how this would affect Kathleen. Thoughts of how she could react if the child proved to be his, played out in his mind. He’d always taken care and never spilled his seed inside any of his lovers. He’d relaxed his guard with Arlene a few times.
God knows why.
He had regretted taking her as his mistress practically from the start. In a matter of weeks, he had grown bored and sent her on her way.
God’s teeth!
How could I have been so careless?
Then he heard a light tap on the door, it was time to find out if his life would be irrevocably changed. When Masters brought in the woman and left the room, he turned to her. She held an adorable infant. If she was his, the babe must be around seven months old. Soft reddish-blonde curls floated around the child’s small head and her brilliant blue eyes—so like his own—startled him. The child certainly resembled him in coloring. The babe didn’t look like Arlene, except in the delicacy of her diminutive features. Arlene had been a petite woman.
The young woman holding the infant looked scared to death. He tried to put her at ease. After all, it was not her fault she had brought him such a major complication. “Good afternoon. I understand your name is Matilda. I assume since you brought me this letter and the child, Miss Arlene has passed on. Please, bring her to me.”
She stepped forward and handed the infant to him. The child looked at him and smiled. She reached up, trying to grab his nose. The baby’s tiny fingers entranced him. Her soft little body felt right in his arms, even though he had never held an infant before.
Andrew motioned to the woman, indicating she take a seat. He sat on the sofa across from her.
The moment of truth is at hand.
Pulse racing and heart thumping, he gently laid the babe beside him and unwrapped the blanket swaddling her. The pale blue gown had a drawstring neck. With shaking hands, he slowly untied the pink ribbon and slipped the gown down her right shoulder.
There it was.
The birthmark matched the one he had on his shoulder, perfectly.
Adrenaline rushed through his system.
No doubt remained…the child was his. He had no idea how he would explain this to Kathleen. He just hoped she could forgive him. Straightening his daughter’s clothes, he picked her up and held her close against his chest as he stood. Arianna smelled clean and fresh. Obviously, Matilda took good care of her. At least, he would not have to worry about finding another wet nurse, as long as the woman wanted to continue to care for the babe.
“She’s a beautiful child. If you’ve taken care of her from the beginning, I would think you’ve grown quite attached to her. Matilda, are you willing to stay on with the child?”
She vigorously nodded. “Oh, yes, milord. I loves th’ little darlin’. I’ve looked after ’er ever since ’er birth. ’er mama didn’t ’ave no milk fer th’ babe. Th’ birth was ’ard on Miss Arlene. She never fully recovered. At the end, she couldn’t even ’old Arianna. It was so sad when she died.”
“How did you find me here?”
“Miss Arlene gave me yer address in Lon’on. When I took the babe there, yer housekeeper almost turned me away. Then when I showed ’er the child, she finally gave me yer address ’ere. I barely had enough money t’ make th’ trip. A ’ard trip is was, milord, what wit the little miss and all, although she barely cried and slept most o’ th’ way ’ere.”
Surprised Mrs. Elwood had given the girl his address, albeit, she probably saw this as a way to cause a breach between him and Kathleen. “Thank you, Matilda, for bringing the child to me and enduring such a difficult trip. I’m pleased you’re willing to stay on. My butler will show you to the nursery. No one has used it in many years. I shall send a few of the maids to clean. I will determine later if this will be permanent, or whether I will choose to find another residence for you and the child.”
After the butler left with the woman, he dropped into his seat. Waves of shock rolled over him. He was a father of a beautiful little girl. While he dreaded having to explain this to Kathleen, he could
n’t turn his back on his daughter. He prayed his wife would understand. It wasn’t as if it had happened while they were married. He’d had the affair with Arlene a long time ago.
Kathleen seemed quite enamored with her niece and nephews. At least she liked children. Well, no use putting this off. He needed to find his wife and tell her. He would not want her to hear of Arianna’s arrival before he had a chance to talk to her.
He found Kathleen in the garden sitting on the bench reading. She looked so beautiful with the sunlight shining on her hair. It caused the blonde highlights to glimmer. God, he hoped this didn’t ruin their budding friendship. He even felt she might be falling in love with him. She certainly responded to his overtures of affection.
When she saw him, she looked up and smiled. “Did you finish your work?”
He sat beside her on the bench and took her hand in his, gently rubbing her knuckles. “Yes, all finished. Kathleen…something very unexpected has come up.”
Oh, Lord, how do I tell her about Arianna?
He took a deep breath, trying to steady his voice. “I received a visitor.”
“Oh? Who was it?” she asked.
He hesitated, trying to find the right words. “It’s a young woman. Her name is Matilda, and she brought me a letter from someone from my past. Kathleen—” He paused for a moment to gather his courage. “I’ve made mistakes in the past few years and lived quite recklessly. Well…one of those mistakes…has come back to haunt me.”
Her eyes widened, obviously concerned. “Just tell me. You’re making me nervous. What did the letter say, and, who is this woman, Matilda? What is she to you?”
Knowing of no easy way to tell her, he blurted out, “I had a liaison with a ballet dancer close to eighteen months ago. The affair only lasted a month, then I broke it off and sent her away. The woman wrote to me a few times. Since I didn’t want anything to do with her, I threw the letters away without opening them. I should have read them—”
Kathleen interrupted, “Why?” Her voice escalated as she continued speaking. “What is going on? Please, don’t keep me in suspense any longer.”
“It turns out, Arlene was—that’s the woman’s name—she was with child. The letters were written to inform of her situation, since I never read them, I didn’t know. The missive I received today was from her. The young woman, Matilda, is a wet nurse.”
“What!” She stood, letting her book fall to the ground. “Are you telling me she brought you a child?”
“Yes, Arlene died recently, and she has sent the infant to me.” Then he rushed on. “Oh, God, Kathleen, please say you’ll forgive me. I’m sorry I’ve entangled you in another mess, but I can’t turn my back on the child. At first, I didn’t want to believe it, even though the babe resembles me to a startling degree. You remember the birthmark on my shoulder? Arianna has the same one. There’s no doubt, she’s mine.”
A wealth of emotions flitted across her ashen face, her green eyes dulled. Andrew could see the pain in them, and his heart dropped to his feet. She swayed, and he moved to catch her before she fainted, but she pushed him away.
She steadied herself and let out a slight groan. “Oh, my, this is such a shock. A child. Where is…your daughter now?”
“I’ve had her and her wet nurse installed in the nursery for now, until I can decide what to do.”
“What is there to decide?” she retorted, anger and hurt radiating in her voice. “She’s your daughter. Of course, she will live here with you.”
He noticed she didn’t include herself in her statement.
Oh, God, I can’t lose Kathleen.
Thinking fast, he told her, “I shan’t ask you to raise her. I shall find a house for Arianna and her wet nurse in Weymouth. That way you will not see the child.”
Kathleen’s stubborn gaze met his, a gaze that could not bode well. “The child is innocent of any of your wrongdoing.” Her brittle tone alarmed him. “As your daughter, she deserves to live here with all the rights and privileges that entails.”
Andrew’s head started spinning, Surely, Kathleen had not thought through the ramifications of this situation. He would not want her to make an impetuous decision, then later regret it. “I suggest you think on this at least for a few days. You may feel differently once you’ve had time to consider how this could affect the rest of our lives. As much as I appreciate you wanting to be a part of the child’s life, I need you to give this additional thought.”
She folded her arms over her chest with a determined expression on her face, one he had grown to know well. “I do not need any more time. We will raise Arianna. I will not change my mind, no matter how long I think on it. She is your flesh and blood. I could no more turn a blind eye to her than shun any defenseless person or animal.”
He pushed his fingers through his hair and looked toward heaven. Why did he end up with such a willful young woman, determined to save anyone who came in her path? He had to make her see reason. “I insist you forgo your decision until you’ve at least had an opportunity to sleep on this.”
“I. Do not. Need. More time.” Her eyes blazed a path straight to his soul.
By this time, she’d become even more obstinate. He finally relented and had to pray Kathleen would not grow to regret her choice later. “Since you’re determined on this, I will accept your word that I cannot change your mind.”
Looking somewhat appeased, she said, “I shall not turn my back on this child and I will not let you either. As to what I feel toward you, I need to think on that.”
His gut twisted at those chilling words. “Please don’t leave me, Kathleen. I know this is a lot to take in, but I don’t want to lose your friendship. Can you ever forgive me?” He held his breath as he waited for her to answer.
She turned her back and made no sound, then after what seemed like a never-ending length of time, she straightened her shoulders and turned back to face him.
She met his gaze, then quietly spoke. “Forgiveness is not the issue as much as trust. While this happened well before we met, it’s yet another example of the type of life you led. We’re married and nothing can change that, so no, I shan’t leave you.”
“Thank God. I—”
Kathleen interrupted. “I’m not finished.”
“Oh. Please…continue.”
“I will admit this is quite an unexpected turn of events, and we will need to make adjustments. But, let me make myself perfectly clear. If I ever think you have been unfaithful to me, I will not forgive that. Do you understand me, my lord?”
Andrew released the breath he hadn’t realized he held, then assured her, “I would never want to hurt you like that. I’ve grown inordinately fond of you over the past couple of months, and I want our marriage to be a happy one. Please don’t let this interfere with our growing accord.”
She gave him a meaningful stare. “Well, make sure you never give me any reason to doubt you.”
He picked up her hand and brought it to his lips, giving it a soft kiss. “Kathleen, you’re the most incredible woman I’ve ever known. Thank you for your compassion and understanding.”
“Harrumph. You had best remember what I have said, if you want to continue living in harmony. Now, why don’t we go upstairs to the nursery, so you can introduce me to Arianna?”
As soon as Kathleen saw his daughter, she asked to hold her. Andrew watched as she cuddled the child in her arms, cooing and playing with her. While it relieved him to see her so taken with the babe, he hoped his daughter would not interfere with the time they spent together. It was important for the two of them to get to know each other better. For that to happen they needed to spend a lot of time in each other’s company. The timing could not be less opportune.
He glanced around the nursery and noticed how dated everything looked. Arianna would be the first female child to occupy the nursery in quite some time, and the room didn’t have any items suitable for a girl. Perhaps, Kathleen would be willing to redecorate the room. His daughter deserved to
have a comfortable environment.
Capturing her eye, he stated, “This nursery needs attention. Would you consider putting it to rights?”
As she played patty-cake with Arianna, she absently replied, “Certainly. I shall take care of it right away.”
Obviously, Kathleen had everything well in hand. Feeling left out, he murmured, “Then I shall go meet with my steward and leave you to it then. I’ll see you at dinner.” With a dismissive nod, she continued playing with the child.
When Andrew arrived at his study, MacDonald awaited him. They spent some time discussing the need for some new farm equipment. He found it difficult to concentrate on the business at hand. His mind kept wandering to the astonishing news of his daughter. He didn’t know how he felt about Arianna. She was a pretty child, but he’d thought there would be years before he needed to worry about fatherhood.
Well, hell.
I thought it would be years before I had to marry as well.
Look how that turned out.
At least, he’d had weeks to adjust before his wedding. To suddenly find himself with a child to care for, along with a new wife, overwhelmed his senses. Life certainly had a way of changing in an instant. He hoped he could meet the challenge.
At dinner, Kathleen kept chattering on about Arianna. It began to irritate him a bit. He could see right now the child would have a huge impact on his life, whether he wanted it or not. His wife had mentioned taking the babe with them when they went to visit Overton Park next weekend. He dreaded this because her brother wasn’t going to take this situation well, and he couldn’t blame him.
He cleared his throat. “Ah…Kathleen. I don’t think we should take her with us. Travel is hard on a child, and it might be better to tell them about the situation later, possibly, when they return from America in the fall. I don’t want to give your brother anything that would cause him to think poorly of me.”
