by Jade Frances
“Rose...”
“Sorry Ev, I’m with Sandra on this one. You should have told us.” I could feel Rose’s gaze on me with the same intensity as Sandra’s.
“We are supposed to trust each other. Support each other and all that. Clearly you don’t feel that way.” Sandra huffed. “You can’t even look at us, you know you’re in the wrong!”
My head snapped up, and I looked directly at her.
“Sandra just stop. My head’s pounding, everything is happening too fast and I don’t know what to think or who to trust! I am sorry I didn’t tell you, but tonight was the first time I got any clear communication! And I still don’t know who he is or what it means. So please, I understand why you’re feeling the way you are, but keep your bitching to yourself.”
Sandra stared at me with her mouth open. Snapping it shut, she threw me a filthy look and turned to face the window.
“You could always have trusted us,” she whispered.
Guilt coursed through me. She was right. Maybe I should have confided in them. But with so much happening on the tour, we weren’t the closest that we had ever been. The feeling of being overwhelmed was taking over me and a hint of panic was rising. Avetta had been serious when she said the academy is going to be attacked. She had ushered us all into the vans before any of us could ask questions. Callista had bid us farewell and gave me an extra-long hug. Rose whispering pulled me from my thoughts.
“You put Pearce through a month of hell for betraying your trust, Evvy. You’ve done the same to us,” she turned to look at me. Sorrow filled her eyes.
“It’s not the same Rose, I didn’t choose this.” I sighed back.
“That’s all you keep saying Ev, but you are choosing to keep things from us.” The disappointment in her voice hurt more than Sandra’s shouting. Rose always tried to diffuse situations rather than add to them. I guess this time, I had pushed them too far.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered back and curled into a ball on my seat. Pulling a blanket over myself, I closed my eyes as my tears silently fell.
***
Three days we had been on the road heading back for the academy. Three days the girls had barely spoken a word to me. We had just been told we would stop for the night as we still had another two day’s journey. Jumping out from the van, I walked over to Adam.
“Hey, how’s the journey been?” He asked as I approached.
“Don’t ask. Can you help me with something?” I twiddled my thumbs nervously. Looking at me with his head cocked to the side, he took a moment then pulled me closer to him.
“What’s going on?” He muttered.
“I, erm, I want to try something. But I would really appreciate your help keeping me grounded.”
Adam glanced over my shoulder and let go of my arm.
“Right, later tonight I’ll come get you from your tent,” he said and walked back to his van.
As I turned, I noticed Pearce watching me. With his eyebrows raised, he made his way over.
“Don’t tell me you two are scheming to go exploring again?”
“No, no. Just seeing how his journey’s been,” I plastered a smile on my face and patted him on the shoulder as I past.
Hours later, our tents were up, and we were all huddled around a campfire. No one was talking. The only noise cutting through the silent night was the fire spitting and crackling. The ambience was weird, and it was clear that tensions were running high. I had Pearce to the left of me, and Adam to the right. Stuck in the middle. Rose was the first to break the silence.
“Does anyone have any clue what we are heading back to?” Her tone was hushed, and she stared into the fire. Her question was directed more toward our guardians. She already knew that me and Sandra had no idea.
“The academy is going to be attacked,” Egan mumbled. Sandra elbowed him in the ribs, not impressed with his answer.
“Yeah, so we’ve been told. But an attack from who? And why is she so certain?” She pushed.
“We don’t know, she hasn’t told us anything,” Barak joined in the conversation. Still, no one was looking at each other and again the group fell into a dull silence. “Where is she anyway?”
“In the campervan, don’t know why she isn’t camping with us,” Adam informed us.
“I think I’m going to head to bed,” I told them. All I got in return were nods and mutters of goodnight. Standing, I gave Adam a pointed look, reminding him that I needed his help soon. He gave me a subtle nod and announced he too was going to head to his tent.
It felt like it had been hours that I laid there listening for the others to head off to bed. Once I heard the fire sizzle out and the low-pitched wheezing of the snores of everyone around me, I scrambled out of my sleeping bag and slowly unzipped my tent. Peeking my head out first, I looked for any sign of Adam. I couldn’t see him anywhere. Then a slight movement in the tree line caught my eye. He was standing just in the shadows of a large tree, motioning for me to join him. I climbed out of the tent, creeped around the others, and made my way toward him.
“So what’s going on?” He said and walked deeper into the trees.
“Well, no one is getting any answers from Avetta and I figured I’m probably the only one that can right?” I looked up at him, hopeful that he would support me in what I was about to do. “I’m going to take off the ring and see if my bond to Aresollo is there. If it is, I will ask him what he wants and what is going on.”
“Are you mad? Isn’t that dangerous?”
“That’s why I need you here as my anchor. I can, hopefully, pull myself back to the light. Please, we need answers,” I pleaded with him.
“I’m not sure this is a good idea, Evvy. One of the girls would probably be a better anchor for you.”
I looked up at him again with a small frown on my face, and what I hoped were puppy dog eyes. My pleading face worked. Adam shook his head and took my hand.
“Fine, but this was all your idea, remember that.” I jumped up and down with glee and thanked him repeatedly. “Right, how do we do this then?”
Dragging him to the ground, I crossed my legs and got comfortable.
“Just don’t let go of my hand and speak to me. You will sense the darkness. If it gets out of control at any point, you need to pull me back,” I explained. He was concentrating on each word I said. Giving him a small nod, I let go of his hand briefly to take off the ring and placed it by my side. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and reached into my mind.
It didn’t take long for me to find the swirling mass of darkness. It looked as though it was ready to burst, wisps of it were escaping the centre and flowing through my mind. A mini storm was forming inside my head that I couldn’t feel day to day. The ring was suppressing me too much. What if I can’t control it? Pushing my doubts aside, I reached toward the mass. The instant I connected with it, my mind was swarmed with darkness. Panic set in, I felt suffocated and alone. I needed to pull myself together. A few more deep breaths and I was slightly calmer. Embrace the darkness.
Letting it cling to me, I called out.
“Aresollo, hello, are you there?”
Silence greeted me. Each way I turned, darkness and silence engulfed me.
“Aresollo,” I tried again. I was losing hope when I felt another presence enter my mind.
“Ah, daughter. This is a pleasant surprise.”
“Cut the crap, Aresollo. I need answers,” I bit back. His presence was disturbing. It was making the darkness that much darker. It was pitch black emptiness. A void in my own mind.
“Answers to what? You are yet to ask anything,” his voice carried to me.
“What are you planning? What are you promising the people who follow you? And what is going to happen at the academy?” I blurted out.
“I will grant you an answer for only one of those questions. But first, you will tell me how you know of an occurrence yet to happen at the academy?” He sounded angry, yet controlled. For now.
“Not that it’s
any of your business, but someone told me,” I replied, eager to get some answers.
“Ah, I had a feeling my Oneiroi was acting out. Never mind, you won’t have many visits from him for much longer.”
“Right. Who cares. Answers?” I was rushing, the void was growing larger, and I was afraid if I got too sucked in, it would consume me. Adam was still in the back of my mind and I could still feel his hand gripping mine tight. But that was fading. I was gradually starting to drift away from him. “Aresollo I need answers.”
“I told you child, I will answer one. I am interested to know why you are in such a hurry. You summoned me here with your wailing.” I was growing impatient. The suffocating feeling I had first felt was taking over. If I didn’t disconnect soon, I would have to fight to reach for the light. “Is dear old Avetta not informing you of what’s going on outside the academy walls? Does she think she is safe in there?”
He doesn’t know we aren’t there. But he was right. She doesn’t tell us anything.
“None of that matters, Aresollo,” I cut him off. “I have made a brave choice to reach to you for answers. Don’t make me regret it.”
“Brave! Ha child, we are only in your mind. What could I possibly achieve in here?”
“I don’t know what you are capable of,” I snapped back.
“Correct, but you will soon find out. Goodbye, Evangeline.” I felt his energy diminishing.
“No, wait! The one answer!” I called out to him. Just before he faded completely, an ominous whisper reached me.
“I lost nothing in that cavern, my child. But you, you will soon know what it’s like to lose everything. There is something coming for the academy. Something that will cause such destruction your Queen Avetta will think twice about opposing me in the future. It is time for you all to learn.”
Then he was gone. The darkness engulfed me. I could hear voices somewhere in the distance, but I couldn’t reach them.
“Pull her back.”
“Do something.”
“I’m trying!”
“Little Siren, come back.”
“Evvy, push for the light!”
Both voices were getting further away. There was no light around me. Nothing to reach for. I was suffocating in the pit of black. Suddenly, a wave of calm washed over me. The dark mass began to recoil and retreat into the corner of my mind. Everything was getting clearer. Small slivers of light were shining before me. Reaching for it, I used what little energy I had left to pull myself back to Adam.
Only when I opened my eyes, it wasn’t Adam I was looking up at. It was Pearce, and he was furious.
“You’ve taken it too far this time, Evangeline.”
I rushed to stand, and my legs gave out beneath me. Reaching out to Aresollo had drained me.
“Pearce. Wait!”
Adam helped me up to my feet and supported my weight as we followed Pearce’s retreating form. I gave him a grateful smile.
“Pearce, just hold on and let me explain,” I shouted after him.
“Explain what Evangeline? How you put yourself in danger? How reckless you’ve been acting lately?” Pearce stopped abruptly and made his way back. Stopping two feet away from us, his eyes were glinting in the moonlight. He was brimming with anger. “And how about the fact it’s always him you turn to when you act this way?” Throwing his head toward Adam as he said it.
I recoiled and folded in on myself. He was really, really mad.
“I just wanted answers,” I told him, my voice hushed.
“And you thought that narcissist would give you them?” He bellowed. “He tried to kill you Evangeline! You are acting like a child.” And there it was again, I was always being referred to as a child. Whether it was from those closest to me or people I had just met, it angered me all the same. Darkness seeped through me in small wisps, aiding the building rage I was feeling.
“No one tells me anything. This is my life. I get moved from pillar to post. I follow blindly and do as I’m told. Well, not anymore Pearce, I have had enough. I’ll make my own decisions and run my own schedule from now on. And if you, or Avetta, or anyone else doesn’t like it, then that’s tough. I am done.” Feeling triumphant that I had gotten my point across, I moved past him. My energy was building back up the more I fed the darkness inside me with anger. Adam was still supporting some of my weight, but I was feeling much stronger.
“Evvy, it was a little reckless. Everyone just cares for you,” he murmured as we reached my tent. Looking over his shoulder, I could see that Pearce was still standing in the same spot we had left him in. He was probably shocked at my outburst.
“Just don’t Adam. If everyone cared for me, I would be in the know. Yet I’m told nothing. I don’t even know what’s expected of me anymore.” I unzipped my tent and climbed in. “Let’s just get some sleep. We still have quite a way back to the academy.” I zipped the door closed, shutting off the conversation and listened to him walking back to his own tent. With an enormous sigh, I laid back and prayed that sleep would come to me fast.
Early the next morning, the ambience within the group had improved none. Everything but ourselves was packed in the campervans and ready to go. Avetta hadn’t appeared, and no one had gone to seek her out. Which also meant that Pearce hadn’t told her what I had done last night. That gave me some relief, but at the same time I didn’t regret my choice. I shouldn’t have to. It was time I started sticking up for myself. Like Callista had said, I was entitled to a voice in this war. Especially as I always seem to be in the centre of it. I had avoided Pearce all morning. And would continue to do so for as long as I could. He was infuriating. That was another thing I would no longer put up with. A quick last-minute decision to switch campervans occurred to me. I turned to tell the girls I’d be switching. All I got from them were two meek nods. I ran over to Adam and told him I would ride with them the rest of the way back. He looked surprise but didn’t argue against it. Once we were all bundled into our campervans, Avetta made her appearance. As per usual, there was no explanation to where she had been or what she had been doing. When she noticed me sitting in her van, she raised her eyebrows but like Adam didn’t question me. She just climbed in and took a seat.
Once we were on the road, I began my questioning. The whole reason for me switching vans was to try to get some answers from her.
“What’s my purpose in this Avetta?”
She shuffled in her seat and positioned herself so that she could look directly at me. Her eyes were empty. Her stature was rigid and poised.
“In what Evangeline?”
“This tour… The impending war, all of it,” I replied. She sighed and surprisingly gave me a full answer.
“You were born into this, you weren’t chosen or put forward for the position you are in. You inherited it the moment you were born into this world. Your purpose on opposing sides differs. For Aresollo you are a pawn, a mere source of energy needed to further his plans. For me, you are a figure of hope in the darkness. I do not want your energy, and I wouldn’t ask you to fight, not again. But your support and the heritage in which you bare, gains me a lot of followers that we need.” She stopped, and I took in what she was saying.
“But I’m still a pawn to you as well. My purpose might differ, but you’re both using me for something. What if I no longer wanted any part in it? What makes me so special?”
“You are free to leave whenever you would like Evangeline, I will not stop you. I understand that your unheeding behaviour of late has resulted from my lack of giving. I have not given you the answers you seek, and I haven’t divulged you with further information. For that I can only apologise and try to make a change moving forward. And as for being special, you are the fourth Evangeline. The power you wield is immense, something very few could fathom. Even you, yourself have not yet unlocked even a small part of your powers.” Her mini speech was shocking to me. Avetta never admitted to being in the wrong or took accountability for that matter. And she had also spoken to me as thou
gh she knows of the power I have. Yet, for the past year she had told me she only knows through hearsay or what she thinks. I looked toward Adam, who was staring aimlessly at his hands, pretending not to be listening.
“Maybe, I haven’t unlocked my powers because you keep them suppressed. Why do that if what I really need is to learn? I reached out to Aresollo last night. I wanted to know a few things that I thought only he could answer,” I stated boldly.
“It is a power you are not yet ready for. And yes, I am aware. I felt the darkness and the energy surge,” Avetta replied.
“How do you know that? Who, other than me, would really know whether or not I am ready. And, if you knew about last night, why haven’t you said anything?” I was curious why I had seen no reaction from her.
“It is a caution, until we find the right training for you to learn how to control it. I have learned that you will do what you wish to do, with or without my approval. Did you get the answers you wanted?”
“Right and let me guess.. You don’t know when that will be. No, not really. There is something heading for the academy though, but you already know that.”
“That I am aware of, yes. They have attacked many small villages, each one closer to the academy than the last. I have been communicating with elder members who have either heard of the attacks or could be the next.” A small part of me wondered why Avetta was suddenly telling me all of this. It felt like convenient timing. Thinking to hell with it, I went ahead and asked her.
“Why are you choosing now to tell me this?”
“As I said Evangeline, your actions of late are because of my lack of trusting that you can handle any and all information I may have.” I caught Adam throwing Avetta a speculative glance as she spoke. She stopped short and looked away. Ending the conversation in her usual fashion. Which only heightened my curiosity more. I had a feeling she was still holding something back, that she wasn’t giving me the whole truth. But for now, I would accept that she has at least given me something. Maybe she knew it was time that she confided in me. I nodded in her direction, but she wasn’t looking, anyway. After that, I remained silent for a while. It was Adam who broke the silence.
