by Abby James
“The last thing I wanted to do was humble Harry. We’re friends. It was a harmless gesture.”
“Harmless!” Mr Barish ate the distance between us with his one large stride. At that same moment Harry wrenched me behind him, stepping up to Mr Barish, inhaling to expand his chest and straightening himself to his full height, which was not as high as Mr Barish, but impressive all the same.
The air between them cracked like a whip. They weren’t going to end up in a fight, were they?
“Sir, it—”
“Shut the fuck up.” Mr Barish yelled into Harry’s face. “You’re making this worse.” He allowed the silence to tense the moment to snapping point before he bellowed again. “This is unforgivable. You are marked for six months and forbidden to shift for three. Do I make myself clear?”
“Yes, sir,” Harry barked. Although he obeyed there was no acquiescence in his voice. I may have humbled him in Barish’s eyes by riding him, but he was not going to be diminished by his teacher’s fury.
“Head back to your house. You will not partake in any further training today, or for the foreseeable future.”
Barish strode away through the forest shifting back into a wolf as he went. With the shouting over and Barish gone, the forest seemed utterly still.
“I’m so sorry, Harry. I didn’t realize it was such a sin.”
He shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. I was the one to offer. Besides, Linda rides me all the time.”
I glanced sideways at Harry, to catch him doing the same back at me. My lips twitched, as did his. Then we both burst out laughing. The laugh washed away the tight knots in my gut.
“He was so angry. Would you two have fought? He looked ready for a fight.”
“Nah. No way would he attack a student. That’s a dismissible offense, and he loves his job too much to risk it.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone so angry.”
“Mr Barish is all right. He’s strong, you know? Has good boundaries, won’t accept shit from any of the students, which is what you want in a shifter teacher. He’s had to pull a few wolves into line in the past to keep things safe. It’s the only time touching a student is acceptable, even then a teacher’s ironed out over the incident.” He shrugged. “But he has to do it, faculty knows that. I know that. I knew the code, and I broke it. I don’t see allowing someone on your back as such a shaming thing. But I’m the only one.”
“But you aren’t allowed to shift for three months.”
“Bummer, but I have to face the consequences.”
“How can you be so calm about this?”
He looked down at me. “I’m a bear.” As if that explained everything.
Now the incident was over, I realized Harry was still naked, as had been Barish, but I’d been so nervous I’d barely noticed.
“Thanks for letting me ride you. It’s an experience I won’t forget.”
I was surprised when we arrived at the back end of Nylph house. Harry turned to me, and I kept my eyes up on his face no matter how tempted I was to drop my gaze down for a quick look. It seemed shifters were comfortable with being naked.
“I’ve gotta get my clothes. I’ll see you later.”
“Sure.”
He turned and loped back into the forest in an easy gait. Even as a human, he appeared born to run.
Since it was the middle of the afternoon the place was deserted. I took the stairs two at a time beelining for my room. At some point I was sure my inner thighs would ache from holding tight to Harry’s sides, but a shower would help soothe my muscles.
I kept the water hot, standing still for a good few minutes to allow the hard jets to pound down across my back. Nylph had the best shower heads I’d ever experienced and that was saying something given I’d moved houses frequently.
With a large dollop of shower gel I massaged the insides of my thighs, wanting to ease out some of those muscles, but stopped when I spied a black mark, a line about two inches long, slashed across the top of my left thigh just below my hip bone. It looked as though someone had drawn on me with a black permanent marker.
What the hell? I grabbed the luffa from the soap holder and applied a good squeeze of shower gel then scrubbed so vigorously I was sure I peeled skin off. When I finished my skin glowed red and throbbed where I had rubbed but the black mark remained undiminished.
What, how and when? Three questions I could not answer.
10
“Mental discipline, Samara.”
“Not one of my strong points.”
“So it would seem.”
Luca paced in front of me, one hand behind his back, focused on his lecture. I was focused on him, particularly on his broad frame and slim waist. I’d had my legs wrapped around his waist a few months ago. The memory still haunted me, haunted because it seemed never set to repeat again. He droned on about my lack of concentration—he didn’t need to because I was more than aware of my failing—and all I could do was shift my focus to his lips, the feel of which I had experienced, twice. And it seemed another thing set not to repeat itself. Unless I learned to control my ability. But I couldn’t remember how our conversation had gone on that issue. What stopped him from ravishing me now, my lack of control, or the fact he wasn’t that into me? I couldn’t remember the exact phrase he used nor the sentiment. Dammit.
“You’ve had fifty plus years to develop mental discipline so cut me some slack.”
“I don’t think you understand how serious this is. It’s vital to your safety.”
And possibly vital to my sex life. That’s if he was interested in kissing me again.
“And I don’t think you understand how a woman’s mind works. We can’t be told to switch on and off like that, confined to restrictive boundaries, forced into such dogma. We can’t be boxed. We’re more creative creatures, with minds that thrive on nurturing freedom of expression and emotions—”
“Virena was adept at mental discipline.”
Talk about stripping the steam from my argument. “Maybe you should go meditate with her since you feel so frustrated by my lack of mental discipline.”
Luca ceased his pacing, folded his arms across his chest and stared down at me from my front row seat. And that was such a childish thing for me to say.
“Is this you sulking?”
“I don’t sulk. But I do get sick of lectures.”
Two strides to me and Luca placed both hands on the desk, giving him a great angle to loom down over me. “This is why you’ve never achieved anything, Samara.”
“Take that back, I’ve achieved plenty.”
“As a desairologist?”
“Are you judging me?”
He released the biggest sigh as his head drooped down between his shoulders. “No, I am trying to illustrate how much you let yourself down.”
“You are judging me. I had a great small business going there. I built it up from the ground in two years.”
“That is not the point I am trying to make.”
“So what if I never aced all my classes. It doesn’t make me dumb or naive.”
“Right now you are acting like both.”
I’d had all these smart comments building up in my head to attack any argument he made, but that remark slapped me down. With nothing to say that would erase my complicated mix of emotions I stared at him. God knows what my expression said, but Luca ducked his head, heaved a sigh, impatient? guilty? Hopefully the latter. He should feel guilty for what he’d just said. And only because he made me feel like a child. Here I was focusing on a relationship with him when he was focusing on saving my life.
He pushed off the desk. “Let’s start with the blocking again.”
“But I haven’t achieved meditating yet.”
“Maybe I ask too much too soon.” He scratched his chin as he looked at me. “I’m not a patient person. My expectations are great. It’s how I treat life, and I expect everyone else to do the same, which isn’t fair. You are right. Building your ow
n business is a big achievement and for someone as young as you, that is something to be proud of. I do not wish to diminish you, but you need to realize the importance of what we are doing.
“You have not existed in this world long enough to know how dangerous it really is. I have met men like Scullion before, many times over, people who have little regard for anyone but themselves and their tyrannical ideas. The supe world is full of them.
“People like McGilus fight hard to keep the civility between the factions, to keep the rule of the council in place. But there are many who would happily see it end.”
“Your life has been dark.”
Luca went to say something else but stopped. I could see him struggling to reply.
“I understand why you would find it hard to see much good about life. And I can’t help but feel enthusiastic about it. But you are right, I do not understand this world. All I know is the security of Darkwells and its wonderful ideals. If this was all there was to the supe world, then it is a wonderful place to be. I know nothing about the politics beyond Darkwells’ borders and that probably does make me act naive.”
“I wish you didn’t have to know. I wish the way you saw the world was really how it was. My life has been dark, and maybe that clouds my perception.”
“I know you trust McGilus, but what about friends?”
“Vampires don’t have friends.”
“What about sorcerers?”
“It wasn’t so easy for me to form friendships. My father made sure of that. He drilled into me time and again that our family secrets were too great to risk sharing.”
“You mean your wissend mother?”
“That amongst other things. I was too afraid of him to dare risk it. Then as I grew, staying to myself became a habit.”
“I can see why you threw yourself into your studies.”
The moment stretched in the budding awkwardness. The intimacy promised by our conversation was something Luca found hard to handle as he backed away, turned side on, hands akimbo, creating a crack in the cocoon that had surrounded us. “I am at a loss as to how best to tackle your training. I could teach you the manipulation of energy that is sorcery, but I think you need to learn to control your ability first before you use it. I think that is the most important concern right now.”
“Let’s try the blocking then.”
I rose and approached him. Stopping directly in front of him, I looked up into his eyes and felt the instant fall, my weakness that shadowed every moment I was with him. Why did I feel so addicted to him? Maybe it was because he was delectably edible, gorgeous and enigmatic, but he was also principled, brooding and wounded. What more could a girl want? And I shouldn’t forget that bite. Even though I was supposed to forget about it forever.
“Shall we begin?”
He was probably sensing my emotions and wanted to backpedal from the desires I was likely sending his way.
I held my hands up, palms facing the ceiling.
“We’ll try a gentler approach since my energy flows too strong.”
He nodded that I should lower my hands. Once they were down, Luca took a pace closer to me, not a big one as we were already close enough. There was now a hands width between us.
I stared ahead at the dip in his throat just above the hem of his shirt, the perfect place for my tongue to start its exploration. Whoa, can those thoughts, girl. They were bound to fire a few hormones, which would have Luca backing across the room.
He wanted me to focus.
“What are we supposed to be doing?”
“Concentrate on whatever you feel coming your way.”
I felt a lot coming my way, but I doubted any of it was what Luca intended.
I closed my eyes because it was best for me to feel without looking at his broad chest, or enticing eyes.
“Do you feel anything?”
“An itch on my nose.”
“Samara.” Oh right, I was being silly again and not doing as I was supposed to.
“I’m not sure there is anything there, yet.”
I heard his movement, I felt his movement, more so because I was acutely aware of his proximity and any minute shift, which brought him closer—if that were possible—hummed my body alive. And that had nothing to do with his energy and everything to do with his masculinity and how I felt about him.
“How about now?”
This was one powerful aphrodisiac. I felt something, at least not the static flux you’d expect with energy hovering close by, nor was my own ability charged, but my body was. Eyes closed, in the silence of the dungeon, and my heart was like a drum. There were tingles in my body, emanating from a more private place. I was about to lick my lips, but then remembered Luca was likely looking down on me.
Stop this. This is not what he intended from this training session.
I took a deep breath and forced my mind away from the lure of my flaring hormones and onto more serious matters. But there was nothing there. My ability wanted to connect properly and not a close approximation, my body wanted it too. Not just our hands. I’d had Luca over me, pushed down on top of me, felt his hard dick pushing between my legs. And fuck I wanted that again, the real thing, no clothes this time.
God I felt aroused. I would press my thighs together to ease the ache if it didn’t draw attention to my private dirty thoughts.
How could he stand there so calm and controlled like being so close did not bother him or make him think about the last time we’d touched? Together, intimately, and we went off like fireworks. Was that not something he found hard to resist?
Just one touch, my hand on his chest. That’s all it had to be. I bit my lip at the thought. When I realized I was doing it, I pressed them together.
Tentatively, I took the risk, reached my hand across the short distance, so short now it had barely moved when I came into contact with his body. I inhale-gasped at the instantaneous influx of his energy and the sudden tingle on my thigh. Two things distracted me, the feel of him and this strange sensation just below my left hip.
This felt good, this felt too good. He felt too good.
“Samara,” Luca hissed and backed away.
I opened my eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“You are not doing what I asked.”
“I’m trying.”
“Your focus is not where it should be.”
“It slipped.”
Why wasn’t he struggling like me? But when I looked closer, deep into his eyes, I saw the blend of the competing colors. Calmer days the amber predominated, but the crimson was for his rage. And the two in direct competition could only mean a troubled mind. If my eyes weren’t flat brown, instead were mixed colors too, they would be spinning like a pinwheels with the war in my body between being good and being naughty.
And what about my other problem? The strange mark? I’d yet to tell anyone about what had happened in the toilet and no one had commented on my bandaged finger.
“There is something.” That is as far as I got. For some reason my throat constricted, feeling like it was a millimeter wide, snuffing out the rest of my sentence.
“What?” Luca snapped, the frustration leaking out.
I shook my head, unable to say anything. I forced my mouth open, but could go no further. What was going on?
Luca stared at me like he thought I’d lost my mind.
“I’m not sure.” I shrugged. I hadn’t meant to say that. My words had been highjacked.
But my words weren’t the only thing. It seemed from the tingle my body had been highjacked as well.
11
I pulled my jacket tight across my chest to ward against the sudden gust. The days were getting shorter and colder, but as of yet no snow had fallen. A thick blanket of cloud kept the real chill from freezing the ground, but it cast a gray gloom over the walls of the castle. Most of the flowers had disappeared and the trees were fast losing their leaves. A good number of marked students had spent the last week clearing the leaves from the paths and mulch
ed them into the garden beds before they turned to sludge.
“We’ll stop off at Masons. Mum told me they have a sale on their autumn range. And then I want to visit Marble Lane. Apparently they also have a sale on selected items. There maybe something worth picking up.”
I half listened to Amy prattle on about what shops we should visit while the other half of me stayed conscious of the dark figure coming behind the last of the students.
Due to the number of students leaving Darkwells for the city they’d brought in extra buses, but when I spied Bailey standing by the steps of the first bus I yanked Amy and Lorna in that direction. “I want to say hi to Bailey.”
“But I checked the stops for each bus last night and number thirty five is stopping at Salibury Lane and that’s the closest stop to Masons.”
“We’ll need the walk to warm us up.”
“Bailey’s driving sixty four, that stops six blocks away.”
“You’ll be really warm by the time you get there.”
Amy rolled her eyes. “And I’m supposed to be meeting Duncan at eleven. My time is short. I can’t waste it walking all over the city. Look at my list.”
She pulled a piece of paper from her bag and unfolded it. It was crammed with small writing.
“You’re not buying all of that, are you?”
“No, there is also my second and third choices in case I can’t find my first. If you take out those, there is still a lot of stuff I need to buy.” She huffed as if she had already spent the day shopping. “Where’s your list.”
I pointed to my head.
“As in you will buy as you see.”
I nodded. “Unlike you, I don’t have a huge family and lots of aunts and uncles, cousins, nieces and grandmothers to buy for.”
Amy grabbed my arm. “You’ll have to come to mine for Christmas. I can’t stand the idea of you being all alone at Darkwells.”
“McGilus thinks it’s a better idea if I stay here. I’m fine with it, honestly.”
