by Addison Jane
Yet, I didn’t think that living with those images ingrained in my brain for the rest of my life, watching the people who I considered family slowly bleeding out and taking their last breaths, particularly lucky.
“Eagle, come on man, don’t make me be an asshole and get Skylar back on the phone,” Leo pleaded. I knew he’d do it too, to protect me from myself. I also knew if he had to, he’d ride all the fucking way back here to make sure I didn’t lose my shit.
I growled deep in my throat. “I’m still shaking. I can still smell the smoke. My heart has stopped racing, and we’ve already been told by the medical staff not to drive until the morning in case Skylar needs further medical treatment. She inhaled quite a bit of smoke, so it’s better she takes a break before she crashes from the adrenaline rush. We’re both exhausted.”
“Well done turning that all around like you’re just doing it to watch out for her,” Leo said tiredly.
I sighed. “Honestly man, I’m okay. Yes, I froze for a second, but since then I haven’t had any flashbacks.”
Leo didn’t even bother to cover the phone as he spoke to Optimus about what kind of ‘condition’ I was in. It was almost amusing. I felt okay, exhausted, but okay. I didn’t dare tell those assholes that it was Skylar keeping me grounded. The need to protect her and make sure she’s okay was winning out over any other emotions right now, and if that was what it took to get through this and into tomorrow without losing my shit, then that was what I’d fucking do.
“All right,” Leo said finally. “We still need you guys here tomorrow. So leave as soon as you know Skylar is doing okay in the morning. And fucking call me if shit changes, okay?”
As much as I wanted to tell him to shove his caring bullshit right up his fucking asshole, he and I both knew how quickly my moods could change. Especially after I’d had an episode or whatever my counselor wanted to call them—a moment where the past took over the reality of the present.
“Yeah asshole, I’ll call you when we leave in the morning.”
Leo sighed, and I could see him in my head, scrubbing his face with his hand. “Just… be safe, okay, brother?”
Way to make me feel like shit for being a snappy fuckhead. “Yeah, I hear you.”
“Good,” he said, finally sounding satisfied. “When you get down here, we’ll find you a new side mirror. Can’t have you with nowhere to do your lipstick.” If he were here, I would have punched him so hard in the gut, he would have been shitting blood.
Lucky for him, he wasn’t.
But I never forget a cheap shot.
“See you tomorrow, fucker.”
Of all the emotions, fear and I were the most well acquainted.
The both of us were ready to collapse as we booked into a motel in Malvern, Arkansas.
The place was cozy, homelier than your usual side of the highway motel that you passed by in these towns. With large fluffy pillows on the bed that reminded me of soft cotton clouds— adorned with a mint on each—I was completely sold.
Not that either of us really cared about comfort or treats at that stage, barely running on fumes as the adrenaline had sucked all the life from our bodies. I collapsed onto the king bed, wiggling my body into the most divine comforter that slowly molded around me like a cocoon as I sunk deeper into it.
“This is heaven,” I moaned, reaching for the button of my pants, desperate to get out of my riding leathers and possibly climb into a hot ass shower before I succumb to sleep. I had no other clothes and the ones I was wearing smelled like smoke and sweat, a less than inviting combination. Every time I caught a whiff of myself and the smoke that lingered, I wanted to be sick all over again.
I tugged off my jacket, quickly followed by my T-shirt and breathed a sigh of relief to feel somewhat free of the day.
“I’m having a shower,” Eagle rumbled as he dumped the small bag he’d brought in with him—which had been hidden in his saddlebags—on the floor beside the bed, and continued on into the bathroom, slamming the door shut.
We were both in foul moods.
It had been a shitty fucking day.
Our bodies ached.
Our minds were still trying to figure out what the hell had happened.
And on top of all that, Leo had warned me that Eagle was battling his own demons that tended to rear their ugly heads at times of stress and in situations like today. Leo had even offered to ride back to us so he could keep an eye on his friend, and protect me from unknowingly setting him off and dealing with the ramifications.
I’d declined.
I knew that no matter what, Eagle wouldn’t hurt me. His protective instincts were too strong to take over any other crazy emotions that might build up inside him.
Either way, I had Leo’s number on speed dial if anything happened. Apparently his voice was usually enough to pull Eagle out of any dark haze that might settle around him.
I had to fight the part of my brain that told me to ask questions, desperate to know just what goes on in his mind and what he’d been through in his past to make him that way. I already knew it was some form of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, and I’d pretty confidently assumed it was from when he was in the army.
My heart went out to soldiers, men and women who were willing to not just put their bodies on the line, but to possibly give up parts of their own sanity and lose their minds because they decided to fight for their country. It was one thing to stand up for your family, to put yourself in harm’s way for the people you loved and cared about. But these people, they were putting their lives and minds on the line for millions and millions of people who that didn’t even know, who they would most likely never get a thank you from or even an acknowledgment.
It was a great sacrifice to do what they felt was right and I admired that.
I’d dived into that car today in search of a baby who couldn’t protect herself. Who couldn’t fight her way out. And I fought for her. It may not be a miracle or a life-changing sacrifice, but it was something.
I lay on the bed in the hotel room for over ten minutes in my bra and panties, listening to the shower run before I finally decided to venture inside and make sure he was okay. I’d promised Leo on the phone before Eagle had appeared that I would keep an eye on him and let his brother and best friend know if I felt like he wasn’t coping.
Not bothering to knock, I pushed the door open quietly and slipped inside the foggy room. It was completely filled with steam, so I had to squint for a moment to make out Eagle’s figure standing in the oversized shower, his palms pressed against the wall and his head hanging down.
My heart skipped a beat as I used those precious seconds before he noticed I was there to allow my eyes to travel over his body. It was magnificent, a true piece of artwork. His skin had a tanned complexion that I realized now was just natural, wondering if maybe he had some kind of foreign blood running through his veins.
The beautiful color wasn’t overtaken by the tattoos and scars that covered a lot of his torso, or at least what I could see as I leaned against the wall beside the door. There were red, angry slashes at his waist, rounding his stomach and tight puckered circular scars that looked almost like they could be bullet holes.
The tattoos he had decorated his chest and arms mostly, and they were surprisingly soft. Swirls of color weaved and flicked around his biceps and shoulders and onto his chest. I could make out what looked like a constellation of stars and a moon on one side with a rising sun on the opposite. Bands of red and blue were painted together underneath in a gentle wave as though it could be the ocean. I gasped when I realized his entire chest piece was a stunning artistic version of the American flag.
He didn’t turn to look at me, or even bother to try and look surprised that I was there. Of course, he knew the whole time. “What?” he asked. It wasn’t sharp or annoyed, he just sounded tired, unable to give a shit that I was standing there like a creeper watching him shower.
His head was far enough under the faucet, so the spray ran
down the back of his neck and over his body, missing his face.
His muscles clenched tightly, and in response, I instantly squeezed my legs together as I felt my body warm to the sight of the naked man in front of me. He was sexy as sin, every fucking muscle on his body was toned to perfection, and it showed with every little movement he made.
He tilted his head, ever so fucking slightly, his eyes meeting mine and striking me like a hot poker to my soul. They were dark and haunted, and I instantly felt a tug of war inside my gut. Part of me wanted to run, to leave him the hell alone with his demons. While the other part of me was pulled in, this magnetic force telling me this was where things were about to change.
Eagle wasn’t like the other brothers, not even close.
Where any of them would have already stripped me out of the barely-there underwear I was wearing and ordered me into the shower with them, Eagle just stood there.
He didn’t use the club girls, I wasn’t sure why, but it wasn’t as if he’d ever made me feel any less or as though I was somehow below him like many other men did. It wasn’t always the easiest conversation to have with guys in my classes at college or men that hit on me out in the street.
Oh sorry, I can’t date you because I live in a clubhouse full of alpha male men, where they pay my tuition fees in exchange for cooking, cleaning, and sex.
Whore, slut, prostitute… I’d heard it all. I’d been spit on, I’d been taunted, I’d had a teacher fail me because he didn’t agree with my lifestyle.
I didn’t care.
Years ago I walked away from a life where I was being shaped into the person that someone else desired me to be, and I would never let that happen ever again.
“Skylar,” Eagle growled, his voice low and deadly sent shivers up my spine, and I visibly shuddered.
I licked my lips, meeting his gaze again that now seemed to have changed. It was still dark, like the gates of hell were sparkling back at me, but this time they were no longer haunted and instead… I saw lust.
He tried not to make it obvious, but I caught his eyes trail my body, and honestly, it almost brought a smile to my face. I had a few curves, I definitely wasn’t straight up and down. My pussy began to throb with need. I clenched my thighs together to try and hold it off, but it knew what it wanted.
“Do you need some help?” I asked huskily, pushing off the wall. “I need to have a shower anyway, two birds with one stone and all that. Plus, I’m sure you’re probably using all the hot water.”
I’d tried not to let my eyes shift to his rock hard cock that had been standing to attention this whole time, but I couldn’t help it now as he shamelessly rose to his full height and turned his entire body to face me. It was long and thick and immediately had flashes in my mind of how he would use it to give us both what we wanted, and needed.
It was obvious there was an attraction, the threatened spanking outside the diner earlier today wasn’t just for fun. I saw the way his eyes lit up as the scenario played over in his mind.
I unhooked my bra and tossed it into the corner with his clothes before slipping my panties down my legs and flicking them with my foot in the same direction. I could tell he was fighting the epic battle raging in his head, his muscles tightening and clenching as he struggled with himself. There was glass separating us, but all it would take was for me to step around it and into the shower with him.
He shook his head. “You think you’re gonna fix me? That by me putting my cock in you that I’m gonna miraculously feel complete?” He ran his fingers through his hair, and I raised an eyebrow, his words confusing me. “You can’t fucking fix me, Sky. This is who I am, a fucking basket case who manages to pretend to be a normal fucking human being nine days out of ten.”
His words made my heart stutter.
He was far more damaged than I realized.
I cleared my throat. “I don’t want to fix you.”
His eyebrows shot up in surprise.
I stepped around the glass which was separating us, the scalding water tickling at my skin as I reached out and took his hand, turning his body toward me, so the spray of the water cascaded down his back.
I shook my head. “I don’t want to fix you,” I repeated, moving closer and swallowing back this strange feeling in my throat. One I didn’t get often given I was confident and sure of myself and my sexuality.
It was nerves.
“But if for one moment I can help you be free of whatever it is that you have going on inside you, then that’s what I’ll do.”
I slammed my lips down on hers, at the same time, grabbing hold of her hips and turning her until she was pressed up against the cold tile wall. She gasped into my mouth, and I took advantage of the moment, slipping my tongue in between her lips. My hips pressed forward, my cock hard and aching, pressed against her stomach.
Her hands glided up my chest, her touch light and gentle but full of purpose. She grabbed a hold on my neck and pulled my body harder against hers, her fingernails digging into my skin as she moaned against my mouth.
I lost myself in her body, my hands refusing to stay in one place for more than a few seconds as I mentally explored every inch of her skin, every curve, every bump, returning to the places which had forced a reaction from her such as the underside of her breast. A graze of my thumb, and she shuddered, her lips quivering as if one meager touch could send her over the edge.
Eager to see whether she tasted as good as she felt, I drew my mouth away, trailing my tongue along the edge of her jaw and taking her earlobe between my teeth before continuing down her neck.
I froze, my head buried between her neck and shoulder when a delicate hand took hold of my cock. Her thumb swept over the head, so lightly it was almost like a breeze of air, and I couldn’t stop the hum that came from the back of my throat in approval. I bit down on her soft silky skin, sharp enough to have her straightening her back and hissing through her teeth at the pain. She held her breath, and I lapped at the spot with my tongue to try and soothe the sting.
“You always grin when you cause people pain?” she asked breathlessly with another swipe over the head of my dick.
I hadn’t even realized I’d been smiling, but I can imagine my expression instantly changed as just that simple touch sent sharp signals to my brain, and I pressed my hips forward, my length slipping through her hand with ease until it reached the base. Then I pulled back, and it slid down to the end.
“Only when they deserve it,” I replied, licking my lips as I eyed her perky breasts, her nipples hard and erect little buds, tempting my tongue.
The water was spraying around us as it hit our bodies at an awkward angle. Skylar’s long blonde locks were sticking to her skin and her face. Her small hand was now moving up and down my cock, her grip becoming tighter with every pull.
I stood back to full height and our eyes instantly connected. Hers were beautiful and bright, filled with excitement and anticipation, the corner of her mouth pulled up in a slick smile that told me she enjoyed having some control. Her cheeks were flushed, and her lips had fallen open just slightly, swollen and rosy from our kiss. If we went out in public straight after this, there was no doubt in my mind that people would instantly know exactly what we’d been doing, and I found my chest swelling at the idea.
She began to sink to her knees, and my hand reached for her, her chin resting between my thumb and pointer finger as I drew her back to full height. She frowned and I shook my head.
“You’re not going to get on your knees for me, I can tell you that right fucking now. We do this, I’m gonna fuck you until you come, screaming my damn name because when reality sucker punches me again, I’m gonna use that sound as a fucking lullaby to help me sleep.”
Her grip on my cock tightened, and she squeezed her legs together. I wasn’t lying, the sweet sound of her voice calling my name had my stomach doing weird fucking flips in excitement. I’d never been one to get possessive over a woman, but the instant I thought about her saying one of my
brothers’ names in the heat of the moment, I wanted to fucking break something.
Right then, I forced the thoughts out of my head that Skylar was a club girl. In this moment, she was exactly like she’d told me, she was a woman who gave a shit about me, giving me the opportunity to escape the crazy shit that is swirling around in my head. This wasn’t just about getting my rocks off, she wasn’t trying to fix me or piece me back together. We were finding a moment of peace, where the only thing that mattered was her and me.
Her touch was the only thing I felt, her words were all I heard, and it was utter fucking bliss.
I knew this moment wouldn’t last forever, hell, it might be the only one I have. The chaos, the memories, and the worry would return soon enough, so right now, I’d let Skylar take that all away.
“Damn,” she said, pulling her swollen lip between her teeth. “I’d been wondering for the last few minutes whether you tasted as good as you looked and felt.”
I smirked. “Funny, I’ve been wondering the same thing.” Pulling back, I instantly missed her touch on my body and the heat I could feel coming off her even in spite of the hot shower that was still pelting down on us. “Turn around.”
Her breath caught in her throat and she slowly and torturously turned her body, so she was facing away from me, the perfectly round globes of her ass just begging to have my handprints imprinted on them.
“Grab the bar,” I ordered, and she reached for the metal bar that was secured to the wall, I assumed for older people who may need some help to feel steady while they were washing themselves.
Goosebumps rushed over her skin, and she shuddered, her body now out of the direct spray of water and no doubt cooling down a little. But I was about to heat her all the way back up.
She reached for the bar, twisting it in her hands, so she had a good grip. The reach made her bend over substantially, just where I fucking wanted her.
I knelt down right at her heels and grabbed her round plump ass cheeks with both hands, kneading them with my fingers as I pulled them apart. I didn’t even wait to admire the beauty that was in front of me, instead, just buried my face between her legs, my tongue in one long sweep licking her right from clit to ass.
