Charlee closed her eyes, pretending to be trying to remember, but how could she forget? She’d played that scene in her head over and over. But she just nodded without saying a word.
“Okay, picture that only ten times worse. He looked ready to kill Raul. There is no denying he’s got it bad for you. Then he actually admits he does have feelings for you?” Drew shook her head, looking back at the skillet. “The concern was written all over his face when I reached the car and saw your teary eyes, Charlee. I knew whatever it was you two had been talking about was something that weighed heavily on him. And he’s still going to fight everything he’s feeling because he can’t commit to just one girl?” She flipped her final pancake onto her plate and shook her head again. “I’m sorry, but that just makes him such a pig. Someone outta call him on it.”
“Don’t you dare,” Charlee said as her friend took a seat in front of her. “At least he admits it and doesn’t do what some guys do—promise to be true and then not follow through. We at least have to give him credit for that.”
Charlee hated to admit it, but it was actually noble of him to do be doing this. She was sure no matter how many times he tried to kiss her without the promise of anything more she’d probably let him and he probably sensed that she would. He could take advantage of that and he hadn’t. It just hurt that she obviously wasn’t enough for him.
Taking a deep breath, she glanced up at Drew, who looked a little too pensive for Charlee’s comfort. She knew that look. Drew was up to something again.
“Drew?”
“Hmm?”
“We’re dropping this now, okay? No more games. No more trying to prove your theories. No more of anything. There’s nothing to prove anymore. He’s admitted it now. It is what it is. We can’t change who he is, and I’m done getting emotionally beat up over this. In fact, I’m considering going back home for a week or so. Maybe that would help me stop thinking about this so much and move on already.”
“Go home? You can’t go home in the middle of the semester.”
“I can if I’m way ahead and make sure I do it on a week like next week when I know I have no tests or anything important do.”
Making the most pathetic begging face, Drew placed her hands in front of her as if she were praying. “No, Charlee. Please! I don’t want you go.”
“Then promise me we’re done with all this.”
The pathetic expression was gone, and Drew chewed her food now with a little smile but didn’t say anything.
“You haven’t promised.”
Reaching for a napkin, Drew was able to cover her nose and mouth just before sneezing. “Bless you,” Charlee waited through three more sneezes, and still Drew promised nothing. “Drew?”
“Yes, yes,” Drew finally conceded. “No more games. No more theories.”
“No more anything.” Charlee repeated. “I’m done with all this.” She stood up from the table, taking her cup with her. “Say it, Drew.”
“You’re done with all of this.”
Charlee turned to look at her too-smug-sounding friend and peered at her. If her head weren’t pounding so much, she might put more effort into trying to figure out what that grin on her face was about. Instead she gave in to the pain. “Good. I’m going back to bed now.”
Charlee was glad that the pain was all she could think of right that minute, so she headed for her bed and would worry about having to face Hector again after last night’s disaster later.
Chapter 20
Walter hadn’t talked about Charlee nearly as much as he normally did, and still the workout with him that morning had been grueling. After hearing Charlee say she wanted more last night, it made it that much more torturous to have to hold back from giving it to her. To think, if it weren’t for his loyalty to Walter, a guy whose only move so far was to invite her over to see his robot and play chess with his grandpa, Hector could be holding Charlee every day now.
She wanted more, damn it. He’d suspected she might but couldn’t be sure. Now he was one-hundred percent sure that if he asked her to be his, all his, she’d be willing to at least give it a go. And if they gave it a go, he’d make sure it’d work out, because after having just a tiny taste of what it’d be like, he was sure if things ever went further between them there would be no turning back for him.
Hector still didn’t know too much about her, but he knew enough. He knew she was sweet, smart, and when he looked into those eyes, he felt things he couldn’t understand but felt damn good. To be able to feel that all the time would be heaven.
Grabbing a handful of clipboards, he threw them in the box under the counter, and they crashed loudly. Continuing to mutter under his breath, he cleared off the counter of the greeting station in front of 5th Street. Someone behind him sneezed, and he didn’t bother doing the polite thing and saying, “Bless you.” He was too fucking irritated again to talk to anyone. The sneezing went on again a few more times before he finally glanced back, not bothering to hide his annoyance, and to his surprise, he saw Drew staring back at him. She didn’t look nearly as friendly as she had last night.
Wiping her nose with a tissue, she glared at him. “Oh, I’m sorry. I must be allergic to assholes.”
If he weren’t in such a bad mood, he might’ve laughed at that. “What?”
“I just called you an asshole,” she said, lifting an eyebrow.
“Yeah, I got that. You mind telling me why?”
She leaned against the counter and glared at him. “I don’t even know where to start. Maybe because you made my best friend feel special and kissed her like she’s never been kissed before then avoided her for days only to finally tell her to just forget it ever happened.”
“I explained why and even apologized for that. And she is special.” Hector’s words got a little louder now. “I never took that part back.”
Drew lifted an eyebrow. “Maybe because she cried all the way home last night because the guy she’s crazy about told her he’s crazy about her too—only not enough.”
“She cried all the way home?” Drew had just told him Charlee was crazy about him, and all he could focus on was this part. He slammed his fist on the counter. This was the last thing he needed to hear this morning. “I never meant to make her cry.”
“Yeah, well, you did. And F.Y.I., it’s not the first time she’s shed a few tears for you.” Feeling his stomach drop like a brick, he stared at her as she continued. “You can’t tell her I told you though.”
Hector peered at her. “But last night she’d been drinking. What other time did I make her cry?”
Drew rolled her eyes. “First of all, you’re delusional if you think the only reason she cried last night was because she was drunk. Second, I know what kind of girls you’re used to. We saw the little show you put on with those girls in the parking lot after the tournament.”
She paused for a moment, letting that sink in, and it did. Hector felt sick. Charlee had seen that? As if reading his mind, Drew nodded. “Yep, we were just a few cars down, and saw the whole thing and how eagerly you drove out of there. And let me assure you Charlee is nothing like that.”
“I know that.” Hector said quickly. “I’ve told her that more than once. I know she’s different. That’s why I was worried last night. She’d not like the girls guys go to these parties to meet. I knew she’d be vulnerable.”
Drew tilted her head, looking very unimpressed. “So she’s different—special even, just not special enough?”
The receptionist that usually worked the greeting station arrived, making Hector free to leave. He didn’t like that anyone within earshot could hear their conversation. He walked around the counter. “Let’s talk outside.”
He walked out into the parking lot, and Drew followed him. “Can you just be honest here? Do you really care about Charlee? She said you told her you do last night. Was that just a lie because you saw a few tears and freaked—”
“Hell no! I wouldn’t do that.”
Drew put her h
and on her hip and wiped her nose with the tissue in her other one. “So, it’s true then. You do have feelings for her, but you’re incapable of being with just one girl at a time.”
“It has nothing to do with that, Drew. I can’t be with her.”
She gave him the hairiest of any eyeball he’d ever seen. “What do you mean you can’t be with her?”
He shook his head. Visions of Charlee’s pained expression last night battered him. “It’s a long story, and I can’t tell you anyway because . . .”
“Because what?” Drew crossed her arms in front of her, the hairy eyeball replaced with curiosity.
“Because I just can’t. It involves someone else.” He crossed his arms in front of him now, leaning against the block planter wall in front of the gym.
The hairy eyeball was back. “You’re already seeing someone? Or several someones?”
“No,” he shook his head. “It’s nothing like that.”
“And whatever or whoever this is, is worth it? Worth passing up on Charlee—making her cry?”
“Look,” Hector said, annoyed that she kept reminding him about Charlee crying. “I should’ve never kissed her, and I should’ve never told her how I feel about her. And the only thing I ever lied about was when I insinuated that the kiss we shared meant nothing to me. But there’s nothing I can do about that now.”
“Okay,” Drew said, looking even more annoyed than when she got there. “I didn’t drive all the way down here to leave even more confused than when I got here. So you’re telling me you do have feelings for her and that kiss did mean something, even though you wish you hadn’t now.”
“I never said I wished I hadn’t. I said I shouldn’t have. It just makes things even harder now.”
Drew ran her fingers through her hair, looking completely flustered now. “Are you trying to be so annoyingly cryptic, because this is confusing as hell.”
Hector let his head drop back. She didn’t appear to be going anywhere anytime soon, and he doubted she was going to let this go now. “Walter is in love with her, okay? Or at least he thinks he is.” Hector pointed his finger at Drew. “But you can’t tell her. I don’t want him finding out about what happened between Charlee and me. When that happened, I already knew he was in love with her or whatever. He and I go way back, and I owe him this much—probably more. To at least stay away from the one girl he’s ever felt like this about.”
Drew’s mouth had dropped open and closed several times throughout his explanation. “But she doesn’t like him that way. And I’ve been around them. He can hardly speak to her without stuttering or acting really weird.”
Hector shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. Either way she’s all he ever talks about, and he’s working on the weird thing.” Hector frowned, remembering the stupid muted confidence bobbing-head thing. “He’s a shy guy, is all.”
Drew stared at the ground, shaking her head then glanced up at him looking completely bewildered. “I knew I saw something in the way you looked at Charlee. I saw it that very first time at the tournament. I saw it last night. What if she’s the one, Hector? Are you really willing to take the chance of missing out on that for Walter? He’s never going to get her anyway. Why should all three of you be miserable?”
Hector took a deep breath and glanced at his watch. “Have you eaten?”
Her brows pinched. “Not since breakfast, why?”
“I mentioned it was a long story.” It was a gamble, and it wasn’t a story he was proud of or cared to relive, but he knew she’d never understand otherwise. Maybe someday she could explain it to Charlee. “You wanna grab something to eat, and I can tell you all about it. Might make it easier to understand.”
With a lift of her eyebrow, Drew nodded, and they made their way to his truck.
***
Since Drew wasn’t from around the area, Hector chose where they ate, keeping it simple: a deli near 5th Street where many of the boxers and trainers ate. Even though it was lunchtime and they’d be busy, there’d be plenty of room to sit and still have some privacy because the place was huge.
Drew ate silently, listening to Hector tell her all about his bully friends in high school. He tried to read her, make out what she might be thinking as he told her everything: the continual harassment of Walter, the robot, and Walter dropping out of school.
It wasn’t until he told about all the times he spent searching for anything about Walter on the internet, even after he’d graduated, that he realized just how obsessed he’d been about the whole thing. Looking back now, seeing three guys beat up on one guy was enough to make Hector jump to try and help out. But realizing who it was on the ground was what really made Hector deliver that knockout punch the way he had. Not only had it been an enormous relief to know Walter wasn’t dead but not having punched A.J or Theo out the day they took his robot or at least forced them to give it back was now one of his biggest regrets. That punch had a lot of weight on it. It had months and months of Hector lying awake late at night, wondering if he could’ve possibly played a part in Walter’s demise.
He’d even begun to wonder, since he hadn’t found anything on the web about Walter’s suicide, if maybe one day Walter would turn into one of those crazy dudes. Because of all the shit he’d been put through in high school, maybe one day he’d snap the way they did and do something crazy like shoot up a mall or school or something. Hector heard these stories on the news all the time. These guys were fucked up in the head to do stuff like that.
Hector remembered how, for a second, Walter had snapped and gone off on him then suddenly came back to reality and appeared stunned that he’d told Hector off. So many times when Hector had watched the news of these kinds of tragedies, he wondered what had driven them to it. Where had the anger all begun? And every single time, he had the nagging reminder in his head that maybe one day he’d be responsible or partially anyway for another bitter and tortured soul doing something similar.
As often as Hector had gotten lost in his thoughts while he explained to Drew just why he felt so strongly about not betraying Walter yet again, he noticed she’d repeatedly looked as if she were lost in her own thoughts.
By the time he was done, she was chewing on the corner of her lip and appeared to be trying to put it all together.
“So if Walter were out of the picture, you’d have no reservations about giving up all your little girlfriends to try something different with Charlee?”
Hector wiped his mouth with his napkin and sat back in his seat. Of all the things Drew could’ve said about everything he’d just laid on her, this was the only thing she got from it? From her expression, he could tell she had an idea, but he didn’t like it already. He’d gone over all the possibilities, and the main reason he couldn’t tell Charlee his real grounds for not being able to offer her more was this: the last thing he needed was for Charlee or Drew to tell Walter that Hector was the reason he didn’t have a chance with Charlee.
If either of them thought that’s how easy it would be, they were wrong on so many levels. There was no way Hector would chance Walter dropping out of the chess team or even school again to spare himself having to see Hector and Charlee together. Hector had enough on his conscience already. And keeping his relationship with Charlee a secret was out of the question too. If Charlee were ever to become his girl, Hector would make sure everybody, including that asshole on campus that was still trying to talk to her, knew it.
“What do you mean if Walter were out of the picture? How do you propose that would happen?”
She lifted her chin. “You answer the question first. Would you be willing to depart from your swinging bachelor life to try something a little more profound with Charlee?”
Hector stared at Drew now. She also had blue eyes, and while he supposed some might think them pretty, they were nowhere near as breathtaking as Charlee’s. Most importantly, with what he felt when he looked into Charlee’s eyes, they may as well be transparent. It wasn’t even about the color or how big h
er eyes were anymore. It was about what they did to him. He had to close his eyes for a moment. Hell, yeah, he’d be willing to give it all up for a chance with her, but . . . He opened his eyes and frowned.
“It’s impossible, but,” he shrugged, “sure, I’d be willing. I just don’t see how—”
She waved her hand in the air before he could finish. “Where there’s a will there’s a way. I have an idea already,” she leaned forward, lifting her brow and gave him a heavy dose of that hairy eyeball she’d brought out earlier, “if you promise me that you’re serious about this and you won’t dare break her heart or toy with her, Hector. I mean it. So help me you’ll have me to deal with, and trust me you don’t want that.” Drew paused, apparently waiting for him to respond to that before going on.
Hector almost smiled at the determination in her eyes. As delicate and small as this little girl was compared to him, he had no doubt she’d come after him with a vengeance if he ever hurt her friend—again. “I need to hear what this idea is before I agree to anything.”
He couldn’t even imagine what it could be. He’d had weeks to ponder this, and there was no way, not without Walter feeling betrayed again.
Drew suddenly stood up, and for a moment, he thought she might leave. So he sat up ready to go after her in case she misunderstood and thought he wasn’t willing to agree to not breaking Charlee’s heart. Instead, she began to pace, tapping her finger against her mouth. He watched for a moment then had to ask. “What are you doing?”
“I’m thinking. Give me a sec.”
Okay?
She stopped pacing then sat down. “So Walter thinks he’s in love with Charlee, but the guy can hardly talk to her. I’m thinking this is more of an infatuation thing with him. She told me about how awkward it was when she went over to see his science project. The only time he’d been comfortable was when he’d been demonstrating it to her. The rest of the time he was his usual nervous self and barely talked.” Drew rolled her eyes. “The guy had time to prepare for her coming over, and the only thing he prepared for was his demonstrations.”
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