“Oh, is that what it is?” said Lucy, with another smirk. “You aren’t popular because you’re too committed to being kind to other women?”
“That and because I live on a farm, still wear my hair in pigtail braids, and can’t tell one Jonas Brother from the other.” I laughed.
“If the Jonas Brothers were at all still relevant, that would probably be your downfall,” said Addy, sneaking up on us from behind. “That being said, I would like to remind you, as you once reminded me, it’s not about being hot, or popular. The right person will like you for you.”
“Good, you’re here,” I said, completely disregarding her sage advice. “Now you can help us figure out how to get me a date. Or six. Six would be best because I have to really consider…”
“Hush,” said Addy, holding up one hand. “I anticipated your having this little freakout, and I have come prepared. Addy pulled a crisp piece of computer paper from her back pocket and laid it on the table before us. “Open it.”
I unfolded the paper, staring down at six grainy black and white yearbook photos. They were all Delinki High senior boys. Not all winners.
“Seriously? Freddy? Didn’t he attempt to get you removed from the swim team this fall?”
“Yes, but he’s really kind of grown on me. Also, he’s single, sad, and looking.”
“And beefy,” added Lucy, smiling down at his picture.
“That too,” said Addy with a giggle.
We spent the next ten minutes before the bell for first period rang evaluating the boys Addy had picked for me. I tried to think about each one of them with an open mind and positive energy, but none of them made my mood ring change colors.
“Who first and what do I do?” I asked, knowing full well that I sounded clueless. And why shouldn’t I? Dating I had done before. Commitment, not so much. The idea of being so compelling to a boy that they would want to go on more than one date sounded exhausting.
“You’re in luck. Freddy has already agreed to go out with you.”
My eyebrows shot to the ceiling. “You asked him without telling me?”
“It’s February,” reminded Lucy, taking note of my anxious expression. “Time to take action.”
Begrudgingly, I agreed to go out with Freddy. He wasn’t the boy I pictured when I imagined myself committing to someone at Delinki High, but I was taking my goal seriously this year, which meant giving Freddy a shot. Even if I was absolutely positive he had a Taurus mentality.
Chapter Two
Max
I was so close to defeating this stupid dragon from the watchtower. So close. And two months ago, when Addy was on the swim team and never home—best three months of my life, by the way—I had the den to myself and free rein of the TV to defeat all of the CGI dragons my little heart could handle.
But now, three girls and their male counterparts were constantly ambushing my afternoons, and more importantly, Nora was sitting so close to me her leg was touching mine. Needless to say, that video game dragon would live to see another day.
And I really should not have been complaining about Lucy and Addy’s new beaus. Nora was constantly third-wheeled and being driven into my company. No way I was complaining about that. Nora and I always got along. Even as little kids, we always seemed to end up together, like her weirdness recognized my weirdness.
“Why do you love video games so much?” she asked, taking a Cheeto from the bag on my lap.
“I don’t know,” I answered mindlessly as I saved my campaign to finish later. It was a lame answer, but my brain couldn’t come up with anything better, on account of the close contact and the lap Cheetos. Guys’ brains weren’t made to handle girls and thinking at once.
“You should try sunshine, and I don’t mean moving the couch to the patio.” She was looking at me with a teasing smile, and I laughed in response. I could catch glimpses of Nora when she looked at me, but I couldn’t look her in the eye. Not for any period of time longer that the smallest of split seconds. I didn’t know why. Maybe because the chemistry between us was so intense that if we made eye contact, we’d explode. Or something like that.
Not to mention, it felt like she was looking at me all the time. I wish I knew what she was thinking when she smiled at me like that. Was I just a goofball friend to her? Or was she undressing me with her eyes? Oh, please let it be the latter.
“Alright, girls,” Addy called from the kitchen. “We’ve got work to do.” She had her stare trained on Nora, who let her head hang back with a sigh.
“Save me,” she whispered as she grabbed another Cheeto from the bag. This time, her hand definitely grazed my leg. So, when she looked to me for assistance in getting out of whatever it was my evil sister had in store, I could only give her an idiotic shrug.
Stupid brain.
The girls disappeared into Addy’s room, leaving Simon and Gray in the dining room. They seemed to be working on their homework, but I watched them laugh like they knew something I didn’t.
“What was that all about?” I asked from the couch.
Gray smiled and shook his head. “You know them and their goals.”
It was like getting kicked in the gut all over again. I almost forgot about the goals I read in that stupid book. It didn’t seem like Nora was all that into it, so I secretly hoped she would just fail on them like she always did. But now the three of them were in there, scheming their way into some royal mess.
I had to stop them, but how the heck would I know what they had planned? And how would I cancel all of it so that I never had to watch Nora prancing around with some idiot?
Glancing back at the two guys at the table, an idea slammed me in the back of the head like a baseball bat. I hopped up from the couch and slid into the empty seat at the table.
“So…” I asked, trying to act normal...or at least as not-weird as possible. “How much do you guys know about Nora’s goal?”
Simon bit back a laugh. “Why do you ask?”
“Like you didn’t already read it,” Gray added.
“Of course I did.”
“So you know that they’re trying to hook her up with someone by prom,” said Gray, looking back down at his homework.
“Terrible goal,” I added.
“You’re only saying that because you’re into her,” Simon corrected me.
“Well, duh.” I was practically whisper-shouting, hoping the girls wouldn’t overhear us. I didn’t care who knew about my Nora crush, as long as it wasn’t Nora, Addy, and for good measure, Lucy.
My overbearing sister made it pretty clear years ago that her friends were strictly off limits. And I always assumed I would just cross that bridge when the time came. But now with them plotting her love life in the next room, it would seem that time was either now or never.
“Yeah, we can tell,” Gray noted.
“So, what do I do? Aside from ask their boyfriends to put in a good word for me…”
Gray looked up with a grimace. “You’re asking a lot. Addy’s not so easily persuaded.”
“You don’t think I know that? She’d kill me for even considering one of her friends, but I mean come on! I’m a good guy, and I’m only eleven months younger than her. Eight months younger than Nora!”
“I actually think you and Nora would be great together, but what do you want us to do? If you like her, then tell her.” Simon always seemed to approach everything like it was so easy. Just tell her. Okay, smartypants. That didn’t help me.
“It might help if you started acting like she could take you seriously,” Gray said gently.
Ouch. So, no one took me seriously. I guess I wasn’t all that surprised.
“Duly noted,” I said through the sting. “But how do I get my name on that list of potential suitors?”
“Oh that’s never going to happen,” Gray laughed. “Addy would never…”
“Well, talk her into it. Use your abs. She loves those.”
Gray hung his head and hid his face his hand. “Maybe you should
convince her. If she really felt like you wouldn’t treat her best friend like another one of your flimsy relationships and dump her after the novelty wore off, then maybe she would let you throw your hat in the ring.”
Well my sister’s boyfriend was just full of zingers tonight, wasn’t he? Sure, I had tried on a few different relationships in my high school years, but those were all just futile attempts to fill the Nora void in my life. And I never liked those girls like I liked Nora.
So maybe the guys were right. Maybe I did need to grow up a little if I wanted to make this happen for real. I needed to prove to Nora that I wasn’t her best friend’s annoying little brother anymore. I grew up, and if she wanted me to prove that, then I would.
Nora
At the kitchen table, Lucy was threading her fingers through my hair. She had just finished unwinding my braids and was now holding a section on each side of my face, the way the women at the salon did when they wanted to see if your layers were even.
“It’s like...permanently in the shape of a braid,” she laughed.
“It’s for function not beauty,” I said with a shrug. “Besides, it’s shaped that way because I braid it after my morning shower, before I milk the cows,” I added. I made it a point to remind them that farm life sucked whenever possible. Maybe Lucy and Addy had time to get fancy every morning, but I was lucky if I made it to the truck without stepping in manure. A 40 minute hair regime? Not possible.
Lucy made a face.
“What?” I asked.
“You milk the cows after you shower?”
I let out a heavy sigh. “Can we refrain from judgement and move on to the part where you guys help me?”
Addy set down the magazine she was flipping through and grinned. “Gladly. A makeover would be nice, but looks aren’t really your problem.”
I smiled, that was probably the nicest thing Addy had said to me all week.
“Your problem is you’re weird.” she continued.
“Agreed,” said Lucy. And then, “Not that we don’t love every weird ounce of you,”
There was no point in arguing. I’d been weird my entire life. The three of us were friends because they accepted that about me, liked it even, but there was a reason I was seventeen and perpetually single. I scared boys away. Or I pushed boys away. I wasn’t entirely sure which sometimes. It wasn’t like I expected to find the perfect boy. I just had a hard time not noting all of the imperfections in the ones I went out with.
For example: I went to junior Prom with Mark Rollins. Fairly cute boy, very nice, a tiny bit funny, but he had this bad habit of always rubbing his palms together. I spent the whole dance wondering if he had some kind of contagious rash. When it was time to dance together, I found myself leaving an exceptional amount of room for Jesus between us. Needless to say he did not ask me out again.
“I prefer to describe myself as unique, but yes, I see your point. What do I do about it?”
Lucy plopped down into the chair beside me. “You just need a few tried and true dating tips,”
“And,” said Addy, her face twisting into a thoughtful expression, “your weirdness could actually be kind of an asset.”
We were two minutes into Lucy and Addy’s dating advice, and I was already confused.
“You literally just said it was the reason I can’t keep a date.”
“Yeah, but only because you break it out too early. You gotta save that astronomy stuff for date number three when they are already wooed by your sweet midwestern accent and crooked little smile.”
“K first, astrology not astronomy. Second, I do not have a midwestern accent.”
Lucy and Addy dissolved into laughter.
“What?”
“Say hostess with the mostest,” said Addy.
“I would rather not.”
“Okay,” said Lucy, “Say ‘don’t ya got a soda.”
I let out a deep sigh. I was not going to give them satisfaction of making fun of my long Os, not when I was in need of actual help. “I think I’m just gonna go,” I said, standing to leave.
“You can help me conquer this dragon!” called Max from the living room. Guess our conversation wasn’t as private as we thought it was.
“No no no,” cried Addy, her face quickly shifting from a grin to a serious expression. “We’re just kidding. We really can help. Can’t we, Lucy?”
Lucy was staring at the calendar on the Altman’s kitchen wall. The calendar which had been a fundraiser for Simon and Lucy’s Key Club was nothing but sexy pictures of the swim team. February was Freddy’s month, though it was hard to tell, seeing as how he was so difficult to work with that I had to shoot him from behind. He did have a nice behind though, maybe dating him could work?
“Alright,” said Lucy. “Let’s start by focusing on Freddy. If it works with him, you won’t have to worry about anyone else on the list, anyway.”
I nodded in agreement. It would definitely be easiest if I could connect with someone right away. I didn’t want to spend all of spring term feeling like a contestant on one of those awful dating shows where they made you go on date after date until you find the right person.
“Freddy,” groaned Max, the disgust in his voice was obvious, even with the wall between us. I wondered if he knew something about Freddy the girls didn’t.
“Ignore him,” instructed Addy, noticing as my eyes milled in Max’s direction.
“Dating’s about getting to know each other, showing interest in the other person’s interests. That sort of thing.” said Lucy. “So remember to ask Freddy what kind of things he is into.”
“And ask followup questions,” added Addy. “He’s not the world’s most talkative guy so you might have to pull the conversation along.”
“Understatement!” hollered Max.
I couldn’t help but smile. If there was a team for being weird, Max and I would have been co-captains. Only Max’s weirdness had girls standing in line, whereas mine terrified most of the male population. I probably should have been asking him for tips.
“But don’t talk about the X-files,” said Lucy, oblivious to my wandering train of thought. “Or Area 51.”
“Ooh, or that time you thought you saw a UFO,” said Addy.
“Saw, not thought I saw,” I corrected, remembering a distinctly not so normal pink halo hovering just to the right of the radio tower outside my bedroom window.
Addy and Lucy looked at each other, then back to me. “Probably just don’t bring it up though,” eased Lucy.
“Until you know if you really like him,” said Addy, wrapping her arms around my shoulders for an over the back hug. “Save the very Nora stuff for the guy who deserves to really know you.”
Just then, Max entered the kitchen, carving a direct path to the refrigerator. He waited till the fridge door covered his face before he spoke. “Or you could ignore these two nitwits and be yourself. You know, get real crazy, and get a guy to like you for you, and not because you’re hot, or fake nerdy, he said, popping his head back to grin at Lucy.
I covered my mouth to hide a smile as Addy grabbed Max by the ear and dragged him out of the kitchen. I didn’t dare admit I liked his idea a lot better than theirs. But then again, both of them had met their goals before. I was willing to put my faith in them. There had never been a time they hadn’t come through.
As much as they teased me, I knew they had my best interests at heart. Lucy, Addy and I were painfully different. But it was those differences that made us so good together. If only finding the right guy were as easy as finding them had been.
Chapter Three
Max
Freddy? Freddy! Come on, girls. I thought you liked Nora. That guy had the emotional range of a wet sponge. He would never be right for Nora. Even if she did play it cool for the first couple of dates, what would happen on date five when she read him his horoscope and tried to adjust his aura?
All my sister and Lucy could talk about were his “beefy arms.” Gross.
Natural
ly, I couldn’t help butting into their little kitchen convo. It was like I was being set up to bug them. They would not stop giving Nora the world’s worst advice. Ask the questions because he’s not a big talker? How about: if the guy’s a huge dud, then dump him like last week’s takeout?
Before she left, Nora stopped by the den to grab her stuff. I was just closing down my game when she paused in the wide doorway, holding her patchwork bag over the shoulder of her thick red wool coat.
“I’m getting a sense you’re not a fan of Freddy.” She pierced me with one of those smiles, so I focused on the ceiling, the TV, the lampshade.
“All I’m saying is that maybe the chlorine in the pool bleached his brain cells.”
She laughed, like she always did at my lame jokes.
“Why don’t you find your own dates?” I asked without knowing why. Talking Nora into the prowling the field wasn’t exactly on par with my objective.
She shrugged. “I’m just not as good at the dating game as you are, I guess.”
Ouch. Hearing Nora talk about my dating escapades like it was something I was proud of felt like a hot iron poker to the heart. I tensed, suddenly at a loss for words.
Glancing over at her, I could tell she was instantly uncomfortable too.
“Ha Ha,” I belted, falling right back into the role of the annoying little brother. “Good luck on your date with Wreck-it Ralph.”
She laughed again, but it was a little forced. “I was just messing with you, Max.”
“I know.” I stood up from the couch and passed by on my way to the kitchen. As my arm breezed past hers, I gave her a playful shove which she returned.
Would I still be able to mess around with her like this when she had a hunky boy on her arm? Or would he feel all threatened and steal her away from me forever?
“Bye, Max,” she muttered as she walked toward the front door.
“Bye, Nora,” I echoed, using her own tone to mock her as she disappeared.
Watching her walk away always left me feeling sort of hollow, like watching another missed opportunity slip out of my fingers. Sadly, it was a feeling I’d become used to over the years, but it never got any easier.
Promised by Prom Page 2
