by Molly Jebber
His mind drifted to his conversation with Liza. She had set his teeth on edge. Her being barren didn’t change his mind about marrying her. He’d told her that. Why wouldn’t she take him at his word? Whether Ellie put up a fuss about his marrying someday or not, he wouldn’t let it stop them from putting their plans in motion. Liza should understand you didn’t let a child dictate who you chose to marry. As far as he was concerned, they didn’t have any problems, except for Liza’s excuses. He was frustrated at having to pay for Paul’s past wrongful treatment of her. He had to convince her that waiting would be silly. He’d start with having a word with Ellie.
He followed the bacon aroma to the kitchen at five in the morning. “Bacon and scrambled eggs?”
The smile crossing her petal lips and bright blue eyes lifted his mood and brought hope that he was all wrong thinking she might put up a fuss about Liza. He took a seat.
She placed a full plate of food and a cup of warm coffee in front of him and joined him at the table with the same for herself. “I loved waking up in my own bed.” She squeezed his fingers. “I’m glad I’m home with you.”
His deep brown gaze met hers. “Ellie, I was empty without you. You’re my sunshine and you mean more to me than I could ever fully express in words.” He held a strip of bacon in his fingers, then set it back on his plate. “Ellie, I love Liza. She loves me too.”
She twisted in her seat. “What did you say?”
He raised his voice. “I’m not going to mince words. Liza and I are in love. I’ve asked her to marry me, but she insisted we not talk about the future until we gave you time to return. Now that you’re home, I don’t want to wait. I’m going to ask her again.”
“Daed, you’re moving faster than a fox in a chicken coop. I haven’t been home any time and you’re ready to plan a wedding. Bringing a woman into our home is a lot to take in. I need time to digest all that you’ve told me. And I’m not happy about it. You don’t need a fraa to take care of you while I’m here to do it.”
He glared at her. “This isn’t up for discussion.” He forked a clump of eggs. “I realize this may be a big change for you to accept, and I would like us to have a civil conversation about your concerns, with the understanding Liza will be joining this family.”
Her head cocked, she lifted her shoulders. “And if I won’t?”
“I will expect you to treat Liza with the utmost respect. She’s a kind, compassionate, and easygoing woman who you know who has been very accepting of you, despite your past behavior.”
He sighed and covered her soft hand with his callused one. “Ellie, please be happy for me and for you. I’ll always love your mamm, and I believe your mamm would want me to marry again and provide you with a woman who will love and offer you wisdom as she did. Please don’t make one of the happiest times in my life difficult.”
Ellie stuck out her bottom lip and stared at the cloudless sky. “I’m upset you’re choosing her over me.”
“I’m adding Liza to our family, not choosing her over you.” His dochder’s pouted lips and sad eyes sent a stab into his heart, and her selfishness at insisting on having him to herself he understood. But he wouldn’t succumb to her wishess. He’d help her adjust. In time, he was certain she would be grateful for Liza and a family.
Ellie rose and carried her plate to the sink, half her breakfast still on it. “Do you want my eggs and bacon? I’m no longer hungry.” She grabbed her things. “I’m heading to Peter’s.”
“Give him a hug for me.” He’d let her stew about his declaration. He was disheartened about her lack of enthusiasm for including Liza into their circle. Her reformed attitude hadn’t eliminated all her selfishness.
She gave him a curt nod, readied her horse and buggy, and left.
He fed the animals, painted the fence, and worked around the property most of the day. The warm air and clear sky provided the perfect weather for doing chores. Soon the scent of rose bushes, sweet honeysuckle, and hyacinth would fill the air and color spots of his place with yellow, red, pink, and purple. May was his favorite month, with its introduction of summer, blooms on flower bushes, green lush grass, and leaves on trees. Liza in his life made everything seem more colorful, vibrant, and happy. He’d persevere to erase any fears she had about marrying him. Marriage had its ups and downs and it was work. The happy times had far outweighed his trials with his deceased fraa, Lydia. His one regret was not getting to spend the rest of his life with her. Being a partner suited him, and he was thrilled to have found Liza to fill the void of not having a fraa to share his day, laugh over the silly things, have their secretive, endearing exchanges, and hold each other during times of hurt or sadness.
Jacob strolled to the pump and let the water douse his hair and run over his face. Slinging back his wet brown hair, he combed his hands through it, the droplets falling to the ground. He smiled and went into the haus, grabbed a towel, and dried off. He redressed in a pair of plain black pants, shrugged into a white cotton shirt, and snapped his suspenders in place, then rode to town.
He couldn’t wait to tell Liza tomorrow he’d spoken with Ellie about them. Ellie’s reaction hadn’t been as positive as he’d hoped. Time with Liza and her family would change her mind soon. If not, he wouldn’t live his life according to his dochder’s rules. As much as it would hurt if she left to live elsewhere, either outside or inside the Amish community, he wouldn’t succumb to her wishes that he not marry Liza.
He breathed in the warm air. His light heart had grown heavy while rehearsing what he’d recite to Liza about Ellie’s response when he’d told her that he’d fallen in love with Liza. God had given him the strength and fortitude he needed in times of trouble. He bowed his head and prayed. “Heavenly Father, Psalms 121:1 and 2 kumme to mind. I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. Please give me patience and the right words to say to Liza and to Ellie as I try to bring us together as a family. Guide Ellie as she seeks You and Your will for her life. Help her to accept and be open to Liza’s friendship and wisdom. Danki for Your love and power. Amen.”
He rolled his shoulders back and peace enveloped his heart. God had directed his path and given him solace many times, and he was certain, no matter what the outcome, He would again. Liza concerned him with her stubbornness and holding on to the pain Paul had caused her. She could rob them of having a future together, and it would be a shame for both of them. Determined to win her over, he would wait for as long as it took for her to trust him fully. He hoped he wasn’t old and gray before she did.
He had faith God had brought them together, and God would give Liza peace and clarity about choosing him for a husband if she’d let God take over. He’d prayed and given his problems to God and it had all worked out much better.
*
The rattle of buggy and wagon wheels, chatter from the crowds of men and women strolling in and out of stores showed town was busy this fine Thursday morning. The hunched-over peddler shouted to anyone who would listen as he waved his beautifully woven basket for sale. Jacob parked his buggy in front of the bakery and tied his horse to the hitching post. He opened the door, squeezed between five women waiting for service at the bakery counter, and grinned at Liza.
Liza smiled wide at him. “Take a seat. I’ll be with you in a minute.”
He nodded. “May I help?”
“I can handle it. Grab the coffeepot if you’d like and pour yourself a cup while you wait.”
He watched her. Liza wrapped each selection, accepted money from her patrons, and sent them on their way with a smile. She gave each customer her undivided attention. The patrons gushed about her treats and expressed their thanks.
He’d had the hardware store clerk grow anxious, shove his purchase at him, and push him out the door when the store was overrun with customers. Liza knew the importance of servicing her patrons and leaving them with a pleasant shopping experience.
He waited for the l
ast customer to leave, then poured Liza a cup of coffee and waved her over to the small white metal table. “Are Hannah and Esther here? I usually hear a spoon hitting a bowl or the oven door opening and shutting.”
“Esther stayed home today to help Abe. He strained his back, and she’s doing the necessary chores. A day of rest and heavy liniment on the area will give him relief and a better day tomorrow. Hannah went to the general store for me. I needed some flour, and I gave her money to buy some fabric. She wants to make a new white cotton baking apron for Ellie.” She held her coffee cup. “How is Ellie?”
“She went to care for Peter all smiles and chipper.” He licked his lip and forced a smile to hide the bundle of nerves rolling in his stomach. “I told Ellie we love each other.”
Liza inhaled and choked on a sip of coffee. She patted her chest and swallowed hard, clearing her throat. “What was her reaction?”
He shouldn’t have brought this subject up until Ellie had worked with Liza and her family at the bakery and she and Hannah had reunited to have fun together outside of work for the next couple of weeks. “She resents me wanting to marry you so soon after her return to Charm and needs time to adjust.”
Liza glared at him. “I agree with her. I expressed my reservations about Ellie and about being barren. Jacob, you’re ploughing ahead with plans for us without listening to me or Ellie. Please slow down and take a breath. Let’s go on with our friendship and allow Ellie and me time to become friends.”
“Does this mean you not being able to have kinner is no longer a stumbling block?” A small spark of hope warmed his heart.
“It’s still a problem for me. Dig deep into your soul and know for sure you’re all right with not having more kinner if you marry me. I believe you’ve skimmed over this important fact because our love is making our world more colorful, happy, and exciting. Months and years down the road, we’ll encounter issues to resolve and have spats about our silly differences. That’s the time when you may resent me for not giving you a boppli.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Liza. I’m a man of my word. I’m saying I can accept you not bearing me a child.” He wouldn’t want another child at the expense of losing Liza.
“I believe you mean what you say at this moment.”
He stood and pushed his chair back. His blood pumped hard in his veins. Heat rose to his cheeks. “Liza, please don’t question my integrity.”
He rushed to the door, wiping beaded sweat above his brow. She didn’t understand him. He suspected she had made this assumption based on Paul’s blaming her for not bearing him a child. He could only hope she would reflect on their time together and kumme to appreciate his trustworthiness.
He had to leave her to settle the thunder roaring in his chest. The love he had for her had no bounds, even though she kept insisting her barren condition was a problem. He didn’t know what else to say to convince her it wasn’t an issue for him. He bid her a curt good day and left.
He passed by the Chupps’ place and turned onto their lane.
Peter bounced on his toes. “Yippee! Ellie, your daed is here!”
Ellie turned and raised her brows. “Is anything wrong?”
“Everything is fine. I came to find out what you and Peter are doing.”
She cocked her head and folded her arms across her chest. “You came scouting for cookies.”
“I confess.”
Peter grinned and rubbed his tummy. “We made ginger cookies and I had four.” He held up four fingers and giggled.
Ellie scrunched her face. “I told you three and no more.”
He put two little fists to his mouth and lifted his shoulders. “I snuck one when you went to the pump.” He stared at his feet. “I’m sorry.”
Jacob pivoted his gaze to Ellie. Her gaze bore into Peter with her finger pointed in the child’s direction. He swallowed the chuckle in his throat. The frustration she showed at the sweet little boy brought back memories of when she was a little girl. This was her first time being the disciplinarian and facing a challenge. This job would test her patience, rejoice in Peter’s victories over the simplest tasks, and be disappointed when they didn’t agree. He fought to conceal the laugh begging to escape. She was about to learn some valuable lessons.
Gently tugging on Peter’s earlobe, Jacob smiled. “I’d like two, please.”
Ellie rolled her eyes. “You can have three.” They went inside, and Peter pulled his chair close to Ellie. The acceptance and desired closeness shown by Peter to his dochder squeezed his heart and gratitude oozed from his pores. The boy had no idea how much his genuine love for Ellie meant to Jacob. Peter might be the best medicine for Ellie, to encourage her and give her the fortitude to find peace with living the Amish life in Charm.
Ellie reached over and rested her hand on his arm. “I’m sorry I was short with you yesterday.”
He didn’t want to discuss her problem with his proposal to Liza in front of Peter. “Enjoy your day with this little one.” He patted the child’s head.
Would Ellie allow Liza to show her the mamm’s love she so desperately needed?
Will Liza want the challenge of becoming a mamm to Ellie? He shook his head. He would do all he could to persuade her to become his lifelong partner. He needed someone by his side on a day-to-day basis to encourage him, challenge him, and love him. He wanted to cherish, protect, and laugh with Liza every day. Hold her whenever he wanted, and kiss those sweet lips.
Ellie would work at the bakery this Saturday. He’d be anxious to find out how she and Liza got along being together since he’d told her they were in love. Maybe his dochder helping at the bakery wouldn’t be a good idea. Could be too much togetherness too soon for Ellie and Liza. He sighed. Too late now. She’d made a firm commitment. He rubbed his aching forehead.
Chapter Eight
Liza tucked her feet beneath her skirt on the stuffed feathered cushion of her favorite wide maple chair. Her supper lay heavy in her stomach and the lantern flickered in the dark sitting room. She closed the Bible on her lap. Jacob’s last statement to her before he left the bakery earlier that day repeated itself, and her mind fought to push it out. Guilt trickled through her. The strong and compassionate man had been diligent to kumme to the bakery to talk to her. He’d been honest from the start about how much he cared, and he’d wormed his way into her heart and soul.
He had every reason to set his sights on some other woman after the way she kept him at bay. Her home, family, and bakery were all she’d needed until he’d shown her what she was missing. These things were no longer enough. His sincere brown eyes and handsome face filled her mind most of the time. She’d never forget his lips touching hers or the brush of his fingers, igniting the love she held close in her heart for him.
She had to wait to find out if Ellie would wilkom her into their haus as part of their family. If not, she’d suffer through the pain of losing him. She wouldn’t put any of them through the unnecessary heartache and turmoil they’d face living together in an unhappy home. Everything would be a struggle. Tension would be thick, and she wouldn’t put herself in that position ever again.
Jacob had his dochder back, and they would enjoy a renewed relationship with Ellie obeying God and Amish law. This didn’t mean she would want a new woman loving her daed, cooking in her kitchen. A woman she’d have to respect and obey. We all had our flaws, and not accepting her might well be Ellie’s.
Liza went to bed and tossed and turned through the night.
“Cock-a-doodle-doo.”
She opened her eyes and laughed. She could always count on her feistiest and loudest rooster to wake her. She stretched her arms and got out of bed Friday morning. Esther and Hannah would be joining her today. While alone to man the bakery at times when Hannah and Esther had things to do, she preferred having her family there for the companionship and help. Since meeting Jacob, Liza’d found having time to herself at the bakery gave her time to ponder their relationship, and privacy when Jacob came in to have cof
fee with her. This would end if she let him go.
She stopped by Esther and Hannah’s as they were getting in their buggy. They hadn’t talked about going together to work this morning. “Kumme with me today. I’ll bring you home.”
They smiled wide and climbed in. Esther rubbed shoulders with her. “Good morning, sweet schweschder.”
Hannah scooted to the edge of the backseat and stuck her face between them. “Danki for taking us to the bakery. I hope I see Ellie after work. Peter must be over the moon to have Ellie caring for him. I can’t wait to hear all about it from her.”
Liza chatted with Hannah and Esther on the way to the bakery. She gasped. “The door’s been kicked in!” She held her breath and pushed it open.
Esther followed close behind her. “Be careful. The person who did this may still be here!”
Hannah rushed ahead of Liza. “No one’s here. What a mess. Why would someone do this?”
Liza shook her head. “I don’t know.” Flour covered the floor, the chairs and tables were turned over, and the fruit jars lining a high wooden shelf were broken, with sticky peaches, apples, and cherries spreading on the wooden floor.
“This is cruel and mean.” Hannah picked up two metal baking trays.
Esther snatched a mop and pail. “We’ve got to clean and organize this place before we open.” She bustled to the door and peeked out. “We can surmise who may have done this later. It could’ve been unruly and destructive kinner. We may never know who’s responsible.”
They lifted their long skirts and stepped gingerly over the gooey mess to the back room and gasped. Containers of fruit pastries, loaves of white and flavored breads, assorted cookies, cooking trays, bowls, and utensils were strewn across the floor and counter.
Liza, Esther, and Hannah picked up the shards of glass, mopped and cleaned the floors, and worked hard to put the bakery back in order.
