by C. A. Gray
Karen, Mack, Giovanni, David, Rick, and Ana all crowded into the bedroom. I noticed a bandage on Karen’s arm that matched mine. But she wasn’t looking at me—she had her arms wrapped around herself, and her eyes wandered around the room restlessly, an outward manifestation of her thoughts. She had dark circles under her eyes. I’d never seen her look worse.
She’s ready to deploy the virus right now, I realized, darting a glance at Mack. He was the only one who had restrained her thus far, I was sure of it. Rebecca’s silence was driving her crazy, and releasing the virus was the only idea she had control over at this point that might protect her. I had to convince her otherwise.
Mack explained, “Val and Nilesh are making lunch, but we figured you might as well tell the rest of us all at once. Now, what’s this plan of yours?”
I stood up to face them, even as I winced a bit from the pain in my side and Larissa tried to tug me to sit back down. I needed to convince Karen that I was strong enough to do what I planned to do.
“We have to make Jaguar and the Silver Six each think that the other is the enemy,” I said. “If we kill off the Silver Six and their ilk before we can make that happen, then we’ll only be left with an even stronger foe.”
Karen was barely listening to me, her eyes flitting from the logs in the ceiling to the waves outside, to the floor, to the bedsheets. The others all looked to her, uncomfortably waiting for a response. Mack finally said for her, “How do you propose we do that?”
“Liam Senior,” I said. “He’s the one with connections to both Jaguar and the Silver Six. Jaguar doesn’t trust him anymore, but presumably the Silver Six still do.”
That got Karen’s attention. She snapped her head to face me and demanded, “How do you know Jaguar doesn’t trust him anymore?”
I hesitated. How could I explain Cathy’s message, or how I’d deciphered it, when I didn’t fully know myself? My brain deciphered it all on its own—I knew the code, but had no actual recollection of how it had gotten there. Just a very strong suspicion. Finally I said, “Cathy told us that Jaguar was on to them.”
Ana groaned, and Giovanni let out a heavy breath and looked at the ceiling.
“Then Jaguar saw her say that, if her netscreen was on the labyrinth too!” Karen nearly shouted. “What an idiot!”
I shook my head. “She said it in code. It’s… not the sort of code Jaguar could crack without knowing the key.”
“But she gave you the key?” Karen narrowed her eyes at me. I hesitated again, and nodded. Karen pursed her lips, and reversed her previous declaration. “Hm. Sharper woman than I gave her credit for.”
“She’s Liam’s mother, and the ex-wife of the General Specs CEO. You’d think she’d be pretty sharp,” Ana muttered under her breath.
“So if we can’t get a message to Liam Senior via the Commune anymore—” Karen began, but I cut her off.
“Then I have to go back.”
They all blinked at me, and either overtly or surreptitiously, every one of them gave me a once-over.
“I think you’ve had enough travel for a bit,” Karen said, her tone clipped.
“I’m not asking. I am going back. I’ll tell Cathy to get Liam Senior over there and I’ll tell them both at the same time.”
“Why does it have to be you?” said Rick at last.
What could I say, without admitting my suspicion? I bit my lip, and said at last, “There’s something I need to find out. From them.”
Can none of them guess? I thought. Isn’t it obvious? But of the group, only Mack searched my face with a trace of sympathy in his expression. The sympathy irked me. He knew what I suspected, and he thought I was wrong. He thought I was grasping at straws.
Behind me, Larissa gasped. I whirled to face her, and saw that she had the netscreen open again.
“Liam wrote back!” she declared, breathless. “He says Rebecca accidentally fell asleep, that’s why she was offline for so long. But Liam finished the VMI! So he’s awake and okay! They just disconnected his LP from the labyrinth!”
The room erupted into cheers, from everyone except Karen and me. Karen closed her eyes, clapped both hands over her mouth, and would have sagged to the floor if Mack hadn’t supported her. And I—felt glad. Liam was okay.
My best friend was okay.
Chapter 27: Liam
“Bec.” She rested against my chest, still out cold. I smoothed her hair away from her cheek, tucking it behind her ear. When this still produced no stir, I shook her shoulders lightly. “Bec. Wake up.”
She gave a soft little moan, and scrunched up her face before opening her eyes. Her face was covered in some kind of prosthetic makeup which was now crumbling off—her disguise, I assumed—but I knew those sage green eyes when they blinked open at me. Then she sat up, alert.
“Liam! Ohmigosh, you’re awake! You’re okay? Are you okay?” she babbled, putting her hands all over my face as if to assure herself of my reality.
“I’m fine, but let’s get me offline, okay? I just finished the VMI, and I got to the screen to disable the A.E. chip via the Commune, but I need you to read the LP address and enter it in there. Ready?”
She nodded vigorously, and a chunk of her fake cheekbone fell into her lap. She brushed it onto the carpet absently, as I ducked under the helmet. Rebecca navigated the VMI screen with her fingers, found what she was looking for, and input the numbers into the Commune screen. I ducked back out from under the helmet as she slid the netscreen back over to me, and breathed a sigh of relief.
“Offline?” she squeaked.
I nodded, and closed my eyes. Neither of us spoke for a long moment. I heard her shift, and when I opened my eyes again, I saw that she was across the room and bent over a water basin, splashing and scrubbing her face. She’d noticed the crumbling prosthetics too, then.
“I’ll—tell everyone at the compound. I’m sure they’re all freaking out over there,” I volunteered.
She glanced at me in the mirror, her face dripping into the basin. “Okay.”
Suddenly I felt the awkwardness between us, as I typed the update and sent it to M, Larissa, Francis, and Mack. Then I closed the netscreen, not waiting for a reply. There would be time enough for that later. Instead, I watched as Rebecca meticulously scrubbed until her real face emerged. I had a sense that she was stalling on purpose.
This was the first time we’d been alone together since she’d told me she loved me, I realized. And I’d rejected her. But she came anyway. I saw the gauze peaking out of the shoulder of her t-shirt, and remembered what I’d heard her say in my semi-conscious state: she’s been shot. All at once my mind conjured all the other ways this story could have ended, and—I don’t know. It was like this blind rage came over me. I stood up and crossed to her as she patted her face dry.
“How dare you,” I hissed. I could feel myself trembling.
She looked taken aback, and dropped the towel. “How dare I what?”
Her face was red and raw where she’d scrubbed it. “I lied to you to keep you safe. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, Rebecca! And it didn’t even matter—you came anyway! To Pendergast! You got shot, and I wasn’t even conscious to try to protect you—”
“Are you actually yelling at me about this?” she balked. “We saved your life, Liam!”
“Well you shouldn’t have!”
I saw the tears spring into her eyes, and felt a prick of remorse, and with it, my anger fell away. Beneath it was raw, desperate helplessness. I felt a lump rise to my own throat. “When I think about what could have happened—”
“Well, it didn’t,” Rebecca snapped, with a tiny step towards me and a boldness in her face that I’d never seen there before. I suddenly realized that she hadn’t reacted when I told her I’d lied. She already knew.
“You got Madeline’s message?”
She nodded. “She thought you were dead already, and thank God she did! How dare you for trying to send tha
t only after it was too late! That’s the most horribly cruel thing ever!”
“I thought it would save your life!”
“Well, you don’t get to make that decision!”
We were inches away from each other, eyes locked, chests heaving. I glanced at her lips, and was just about to kiss her when I remembered that we had an audience.
“Just a second,” I muttered, turning away from her. I crossed to Hepzibah first, and powered her down. Then I turned to Madeline, whose eyes widened at me.
“You need me! I have to stay on to emit the signal!” she protested.
“Not anymore, I’m offline now. You can stop.”
“Okay, I’ll be quiet!” She zipped her fingers across her lips and turned to face the wall, and I had to smirk. The voyeuristic little thing wanted me to leave her on, so she could hear every word.
“Nope, not this time. Sorry,” I told her, reaching for the power button behind her neck. All of her little metallic joints slumped into neutral.
I turned back around to face Rebecca, who stood in the middle of the room where I’d left her. Her arms hung straight at her sides, and she kept swallowing, and wouldn’t meet my eyes. She was terrified. And it was so adorable. I decided right then to milk it—I’d waited a very long time for this moment, after all.
I crossed back to her and murmured, “I thought if I said I didn’t love you, that you wouldn’t be such a complete idiot.”
She shrugged, wrapping her arms around her stomach self-consciously. “Sorry to disappoint.”
I glanced around the room, landing a hand on each of her shoulders. “So… did I hear right? We’re married now?”
Her face burned, and she started babbling, like she always did in moments like this. “Well, not exactly… a fictional person with your retinas and fingerprints and a fictional person with my retinas and fingerprints are legally married, but only because Mom didn’t think we should give our real identities even to a family on the Commune, and because I had to have some alias to go out and buy the manufacturing printer so I could print the VMI machine—”
I nodded slowly as she spoke, making a show of looking her up and down, even though she was only wearing an ordinary t-shirt and jeans. “So then… you’re my wife.”
I could see the pulse throbbing in her throat like her heart was trying to escape. Was it mean of me to enjoy this so much? She babbled, “In… the… legal sense, my fingerprints are married to your fingerprints, but since Travis and Tracy don’t technically exist…”
Okay. Enough. I touched my forehead to hers, and rubbed her nose with mine, and her words fell away. Very, very slowly, I tilted my head to the side, making my way to her mouth. But I still didn’t kiss her; I just brushed my lips against hers, savoring her little gasp.
“All just semantics,” I whispered. I waited for a second, just to see if she would try to contradict me.
Then, finally, I took her mouth with mine.
It took nearly all of my self-control not to get carried away—after all, I remembered, this was still her first kiss ever. As much as I wanted crush her against me and let my hands roam wherever they liked, I didn’t want to freak her out. So I kept it soft and gentle, reigning myself in every few seconds when I realized I was getting ahead of myself.
After a few moments, she broke away, breathless, and gasped, “Wow.”
I chuckled softly. “I like that response.” I snaked an arm around her waist and pressed her against me, and her shoulder bumped into my chest. She sucked in another breath, but this time I could tell it was from pain.
“Sorry!” I whispered, cradling her face in my hands. “Are you okay?”
She nodded, and I took her hands and pulled her toward the bed. I saw her eyes go wide, and I let go, holding up my hands and grinning. “I’ll be good, I promise.” I propped myself up against the back headboard, and very gently pulled her against me, careful not to touch her injured shoulder. She lowered her head onto my chest, and I was surprised to hear her suck in a shuddering breath. Was she crying? After that? Slightly alarmed, I looked at her face, and she shook her head at me.
“It’s just—I’ve wasted so much time!” she confessed. “I’ve been such an idiot…”
“Yeah,” I agreed lightly. “You have.” I kissed her temple to show I wasn’t mad about it.
“I was just so scared… I was scared of this, actually! This exact scenario!” She gestured around the room, and I raised an eyebrow at her.
“Really? So that night in your flat in Dublin, when I came over for dinner and you started babbling so I wouldn’t kiss you, you were flashing forward to, ‘what if he gets abducted and becomes a nanobot cyborg and dies of a virus created by the Renegades—’”
“Not funny, Liam,” she snapped.
I laughed softly. “Sorry. I thought it was pretty funny.”
She went on in a hollow whisper, “Jake and Julie are dead, you know.”
That sobered me up. “I know,” I murmured, stroking her hair. “I’m so sorry, Bec.”
“But long before that, when I kept pushing you away,” she went on, as if I hadn’t spoken, “you were right, Liam. On some level, I was thinking of what happened to my dad. It wasn’t in so many words, but the gist of it was, ‘what if I lose him too?’”
I nodded. “And you might.” She pulled out of my arms to glare at me. I shrugged at her and sighed. “I might lose you too, especially if you keep acting like such a freaking moron—”
“Oh! This from the guy who walked right in to General Specs, the one place you’d be most recognizable?”
I gave her a tiny smile. “So we’re both freaking morons then. Pity our poor children.” I said this on purpose, to gauge her response. She turned red, but she was clearly delighted, trying unsuccessfully to hide her smile. “You do want children, right?” I pressed, twirling a lock of her auburn hair around my finger. Man, it felt so good to finally be able to touch her.
She bit her lip, and the smile finally broke free. “I do. Although I recall saying that you in particular should never have any daughters. You’d be an overprotective nightmare.”
I opened my mouth to shoot back something snarky, but stopped as a new thought occurred to me. I had nanobots in every cell of my body now. Can I even have children anymore?
“What?” she asked, her smile fading.
I shook my head. “Nothing, nevermind.” We’d worry about that later. If we both even survived. I changed the subject. “You know when I first realized I loved you? I can tell you the exact moment.”
She smiled again, and tilted her face up to mine. “When?”
“Guess.”
She giggled. “I don’t know… um… was it the song? That duet we sang out in the caves?”
“Oh, come on! Way before that!”
“Really?” she was grinning now. “Um… on the roof in Geneva?”
I shook my head. “Nope. It was in San Jose. I liked you back in the lab in Dublin for years, of course, but you’d kept me at arm’s length for so long that I’d kind of given you up as a pipe dream. But that night in San Jose, after the meeting in Francis’s pub, when you and I had tea downstairs at our hotel, and you told me all about Andy—”
“Oh please, don’t bring him up!” she groaned.
I smiled, tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear as I went on, “When I realized that you’d been pushing me away all that time because you’d never let go of your dad—that was the moment. Once I understood that, I knew I could break down your walls eventually. I just had to be persistent.”
“That’s exactly what I wrote in my journal after that conversation! It was almost like you were undaunted, or maybe even more intense than before!”
I sat up straighter, smiling. “You wrote about me in your journal? Can I read it?”
“No!” she said at once, but she was grinning too. Then, perhaps feeling like this might not have been strong enough, she added, “Don’t you dare�
��I’m serious, Liam!”
“We’ll revisit that later,” I winked.
“We will not!”
I laughed. “All right. So if I can’t read it for myself, when did you figure it out?”
Her smile faded. “About a minute before I told you.”
My smile faded too. That was not a happy memory.
“That was when I realized it in so many words, anyway,” she went on, “but… in hindsight, I think I started to like you in San Jose. I just wouldn’t admit it to myself.”
“When?” I pressed.
She licked her lips. “Probably that same night,” she confessed. “I only figured out you liked me on that walk back to the hotel, when you basically admitted you were jealous of Andy.”
“Seriously?” I guffawed, “you had no idea before that? Wow.”
“You weren’t very obvious!” she protested.
“Are you kidding me? Back in Dublin, I made up excuses to talk to you in the lab like all the time, and I was always trying to get you to invite me to your shows, and come to parties—”
“I thought you were just trying to make fun of me!”
“Yeah, because I liked you! Kindergarten flirting, 101!” I ruffled her hair, and she giggled.
“Actually, I do know the moment I fell in love with you,” she went on. “It was our second night at the compound, when you were still recovering from the pneumothorax, and I was reading ‘Don Quijote’ to you out loud.”
“I remember that,” I murmured. “When you read the line, ‘there were no embraces, because where there is great love there is often little display of it,’ and you just stopped and looked at me—”
“—and then you took my hand,” she finished.
“Uh huh. And I know you understood me, because you turned bright red. I was just about to tell you I loved you, but then you just kept reading like nothing had happened! I was so frustrated—”
Her whole face softened. “Really? You were going to say it then?”
“It needed to be said.” I gazed at her, stroking her hair. I stooped to kiss her lips one more time, soft and lingering. Then I sighed, knowing what had to come next.
