by David Liss
She was right. There was no longer a good reason to wall her off from the truth. Alice had trusted me, helping me because she thought it was the right thing to do. She didn’t hesitate or waver or fret. The least I could do was to give her the full story.
So I told her about how the president came to my house, and about going to Camp David and to the Confederation starship the Dependable. I told her about how we were attacked by violent aliens called Phands, and how, with the bridge crew injured, I’d had no choice but to take over at the weapons station, and how I’d destroyed the attacking ship. I told her about all the fallout from that battle and all the unfair things I’d had to go through. Yet, even as I was listing my grievances, I couldn’t help but tell her how amazing it was on Confederation Central. I told her about the thrill of the spaceflight sims, and of having a HUD and gaining experience points. I told her about Steve and about Tamret—how much I cared for her, and how she had hacked our skill systems so I could rescue my father and bring the Confederation two Phandic ships to reverse engineer.
When I finished the story, she just looked ahead for a long time. Finally she turned to me. “You know, it’s too bad you lost your skill enhancements. That would come in handy right about now.”
That made me laugh. “No kidding. But the thing is, I wonder if they’re still in there somewhere. I mean, I can read foreign and alien languages automatically, which I shouldn’t be able to do.”
She punched my arm. “No wonder you’re doing so well in French! You’re totally cheating!”
“I’m using the tools at my disposal,” I corrected. “What matters is that the nanites weren’t neutralized the way they were supposed to be.”
“And this giraffe guy, Dr. Roop, is the one who was supposed to neutralize them,” she said. “Do you think he could have messed with the system on purpose? Kept these nanites still working?”
“That’s what I thought,” I told her. “But I can’t figure out how I can turn everything else back on.”
“Did he say anything to you? Leave you a hint?”
I thought back to that moment, how before he had injected me with something that was supposed to neutralize my nanites, he’d acted strangely. He had put a hand on my face, which was a kind of affection I hadn’t seen from him before. “He told me to remember, but he didn’t say remember what.”
And then it dawned on me. Dr. Roop must have done something to me before I left the station, and now the two things that made me unlike other people were my ability to understand foreign languages and the fact that I had an obnoxious intelligence rattling around in my brain.
“Did Dr. Roop deliberately plant you inside my head?”
Are you speaking to me? Smelly asked.
“No, I’m asking this human girl if an alien she’s never met inserted her into my skull cavity.”
Your sarcasm makes me sad.
“Then answer the question.”
I have no knowledge of how I arrived in your putrid skull, but it is possible that this Dr. Roop you speak of transferred some kind of nanoware to mask the fact that your nanites were directed to only partially reverse your enhancements. If this creature used the technology of those you call the Formers, then it is possible my existence was attached to that code.
“Can you reactivate my nanites?” I asked it. “Can you level me up?”
If I could do that, Smelly said, why would I be tinkering around with your ridiculous suit?
I sighed. There were not going to be any shortcuts. Whatever I was going to do, I would have to do like any regular human being who happened to have a semifunctional supersuit under his clothes.
CHAPTER SEVEN
* * *
Alice had been smart—or lucky—enough to put us on an express bus, but it was still a long trip, and the sun had been up for a few hours by the time we arrived in San Antonio. We staggered off the bus, shielding our eyes from the bright morning light. I was still adjusting to the heat and to walking instead of sitting, but Alice had already secured a cab. She gave the driver an address, and then told me it would take fifteen or twenty minutes to get there.
I wished I could call my mother. I knew she would be worried, but she knew that I had to run, and she would not want me contacting her, since any call I made could be traced. I just hoped she was okay. There was no point in anyone hurting her, or threatening to hurt her, if they couldn’t use it as leverage to get at me, and as long as we weren’t in communication, I had to believe she would be safe.
The cab stopped in a pretty normal-looking neighborhood full of modest ranch homes. Alice led me up the walkway of a tan-colored house with a well-manicured lawn. The driveway wound around the house toward the backyard. I was busy looking for hidden aliens or federal agents while Alice rang the bell.
A minute later a slightly grizzled man answered the door. He had long hair pulled back in a shoulder-length gray ponytail. His brown face was thin, with sharp cheekbones and a blade of a nose. He had plenty of creases around the eyes and mouth, but there was something warm about him, like he was the kind of person who laughed a lot. A long mustache, dark with bits of gray, worked its way almost to his chin. His left arm ended in a stump just below the elbow, and his denim long-sleeved shirt was pinned up over it.
“Hey, Uncle Jacinto,” Alice said with a shy smile.
“Well, look at this,” he said with a big grin. Then, as if someone flipped a switch, his expression darkened. “Is something wrong? It’s not your dad, is it?”
“No, he’s fine. Well, not fine. He’s the same. But I need your help.”
The man cast his critical gaze at me and then turned back to Alice. “Law after you?”
“Probably,” she said. “And that might be the least of our problems.”
He nodded. “Then you’d better come in and tell me about it.”
Less than a minute had passed since the door had opened, and I already had the sense that Jacinto was fiercely loyal. I didn’t want him thinking, even for a second, that I was making trouble for Alice. I guessed I’d have maybe ten seconds at most between his deciding I was a bad influence and my finding myself in a choke hold. My best bet, I decided, was for Alice to take the lead.
As soon as we entered the house, I realized I might have to revise the cover story I had started inventing. On the wall were pictures of UFOs, framed sketches of bug-eyed aliens as recalled by abductees, a picture of Uncle Jacinto standing outside the UFO museum in Roswell, New Mexico. This, I had to believe, was the source of Alice’s interest in all things extraterrestrial.
Jacinto went into the kitchen and came with glasses of water for us: one in his hand, the other pressed to his side with his arm. Then he sat down across from us, leaned forward, and glared at me until I was sure the temperature in the room had gone up ten degrees. “So,” he said to me. “You’re the Boy with the Stupid Haircut.”
I touched my hair. “I like to think of myself as Zeke.”
He looked at Alice. “How long ago did you find him?”
“Just a few weeks ago. He started going to my school this year.”
“And what’s his story?”
“I’m right here,” I said. “You can ask me my story directly, but it won’t do you much good, because I’m not going to tell you.”
“He doesn’t like to talk about it,” Alice said. “He doesn’t want to put other people in danger.”
“Very noble of you,” Jacinto said, leveling his gaze at me. “Except you seem to have put Alice in danger, given she’s on the run.”
“I insisted,” she said. “He needs to get off the planet.”
Jacinto kept his face expressionless. “Does he now?”
“Bad aliens are here, and they’re looking for him.”
“That a fact?”
“He needs transport. Can you help him?”
“Could be. Won’t be easy.”
“They won’t be expecting it.”
“I guess they won’t,” Jacinto agreed.
; “Do you think you two could actually tell me what you’re talking about?” I asked.
“We’re talking about getting you to a spaceship,” Jacinto said. “Though I don’t know what good that will do us. I don’t know how to pilot a spaceship. Do you?”
I will be able to aid you, Smelly said. I cannot say precisely what manner of ship we speak of, nor what technology it employs, but that should not matter to a manifestation of my vast intelligence.
“Yeah,” I told Jacinto. “That should be no problem.”
“Really?” Jacinto said. “You sound pretty confident.”
“Trust him, okay?” Alice said. “He can do what he says.”
“I guess you don’t get to be the Boy with the Stupid Haircut without knowing a thing or two.”
“Can you help us or not?” I asked. “Because if you can’t, then I need to put some distance between me and both of you and figure things out on my own.”
Jacinto nodded at me, like he’d finished taking my measure. “I know where you can find a ship. One hundred percent.”
I was still not convinced. The idea that this guy, living in his nice little neighborhood in San Antonio, could somehow get me a vehicle with faster-than-light capability was hard to swallow.
“And where exactly would that be?” I demanded. “Mos Eisley?”
“Not quite so far, but still a pretty big drive,” Jacinto said. “It’s in Area Fifty-One.”
• • •
“Area Fifty-One!” I shouted. “Is that even a real place?”
“Of course it’s a real place,” Jacinto said. “They’ve housed a crashed flying saucer there for years. Assuming it’s still functional, it’s the only known spaceship on Earth.”
A flying saucer. “So it’s a Phandic ship,” I said. “I will definitely know how to fly it.” Then I realized what I was saying. “Assuming that Area Fifty-One is not just an urban legend, and assuming that there is actually a ship there, how exactly am I going to get to it? All the stories I’ve read say it’s a military base.”
“That’s exactly what it is,” Jacinto said.
“Then how do I get access to the ship?”
“Didn’t you tell me you stole a whole bunch of ships from an alien military base?” Alice asked. “They must have had better technology, so this should be no problem for you.”
“I had a maxed-out skill tree,” I told her, “and a team, and weapons. And it was a low-tier base, not the most super-secret base of them all.”
“We can be your team,” Jacinto said. “And you better believe I’ve got weapons. I believe in the Second Amendment.”
“That’s great, but I’m not shooting at American soldiers,” I told him, feeling my voice getting high-pitched. “I had stun weapons when I broke into that prison, and not one being was seriously hurt. I wouldn’t use actual bullets on Phands, and I hate Phands. I can’t go around shooting at people of my own species, who are serving my own country, just because they’re in my way.”
“No one has to get hurt,” Jacinto said. “I’m ex-military, and I was stationed on that base. How do you think I know as much as I do? I was only there for a little while, and it was a series of mistakes that led to me catching a glimpse of what I wasn’t supposed to see—that ship. But I know it’s there. If you can really fly that ship, I can get you to it.”
“And why exactly would you do that?” I demanded. “You don’t know me.”
“Alice knows you,” he said, “and Alice doesn’t hop on a bus with some guy she doesn’t trust. It’s not like you’re amazingly charming or anything.”
This guy was making me feel great about myself. “And that’s why you are going to risk being arrested or shot? Because Alice believes I’m the real deal?”
“That’s part of it,” Jacinto said with a grin. “The other part is you’re going to take me wherever you go.”
Absolutely not! Smelly’s virtual voice was the disembodied equivalent of shouting. You can lie to them if you want, but we’re not taking more primitives than we have to. They’ll only slow us down.
I didn’t know if I agreed with its reasons, but Smelly was right. As much as I didn’t want to do this alone, it would be wrong to bring Jacinto, and especially Alice, into whatever dangers were waiting for me out there. Returning to the Confederation and dealing with the Phands was going to be tricky enough without having them to worry about. All of that was still theoretical, though. It seemed to me a better idea to hide and wait a few weeks for my suit to start working than to try to slip onto a high-security army base.
I shook my head. “I can’t take you with me when there’s a chance one of you will get hurt. There will be bullets flying.”
I believe we can do this without loss of pathetic life, Smelly said. I told you that your suit is not yet ready to process ancient ship signals, but it does have other capacities that are now sufficiently integrated and operational for short-term application.
“Like what?”
Jacinto looked at me oddly, but I turned away while Alice whispered something to him. I didn’t hear what it was, but I saw his expression, like he was starting to wonder if I might be totally insane.
If the suit works properly, it should be able to provide you with stealth, speed, strength, sensors, and nonlethal weaponry.
“Does it work or not?”
I told you, I believe it will, for short periods of time.
“Believing is not going to keep me from getting shot, Tinker Bell.”
Then I suppose we must test it.
I turned to Alice and Jacinto. “This is going to sound weird, but I’ve got an alien tech–modified wet suit on under my clothes, and the artificial intelligence in my head says I can use it to steal the ship.”
“Your AI is named Tinker Bell?” Jacinto asked.
I sighed.
“You know what?” Alice said with a grin, “It’s a little late to worry about sounding weird. Let’s check out that suit.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
* * *
I’m not going to sugarcoat it. The suit made me look like a complete idiot. It was a tight, dark green, rubber suit covered with wires and circuits and red LEDs, which had always been off before, but now that Smelly had activated the suit, they flashed in rippling patterns, like a motel sign advertising vacancies. I glanced at myself in the mirror in Jacinto’s bedroom, where he’d allowed me to go to remove my outer clothes.
“What exactly are these LEDs for?” I asked Smelly.
I find them aesthetically pleasing.
“They’re going to get me killed. I look like a runway.”
Relax. If something happens to your groveling mass of organic goo, then something happens to me. I cannot permit my brilliance to be snuffed out of the universe—not when I have so much left to contribute. When the suit enters stealth mode, no one will see you.
I braced myself for the worst and then stepped out into the living room. Alice was standing there, and she immediately put her hand to her mouth to stifle a giggle.
“You look amazingly dumb,” she said after a moment.
“Gaaahhhh!” was the thing Jacinto said at that point. He made that noise because he was standing behind me, swinging at my legs with a baseball bat. He got a lot of power into a one-handed swing, and when the bat struck me a soft white energy seemed to emanate from the suit. The bat bounced off me and I felt only the slightest bit of pressure, but the recoil was so strong that the bat flew out of Jacinto’s hand and into the wall, where it left a dent.
“You might want to warn me!” I shouted at him.
“You think they’re going to warn you when they shoot at you?” he asked.
“Yeah, I do. I think they’ll say something like, ‘Don’t move or we’ll shoot.’”
“Okay,” he admitted, “they probably would. But after that they’ll just shoot, so what good would the warning do?”
“The point is, I didn’t tell you I was ready. You could have hurt me.”
“I went for y
our legs. Any injury would have been nonlethal.”
I pointed at him. “That’s really comforting. Just don’t do anything to me again unless I tell you I’m ready.”
“Fine,” he said, looking hurt. “It’s just that I only have one arm, and I wanted to contribute.”
I suddenly felt horrible. “Jacinto, I’m sorry if you thought I meant—”
He laughed. “I’m just messing with you.” He then rammed his fist into my stomach. The white light flashed, and his arm jerked back. He flopped it around after. “Man, that tingles right up to the elbow.”
“I’d rather you stopped hitting me,” I told him.
“Why? It doesn’t hurt you.”
Alice smacked me in the back of the head. Her attack was pretty light; I don’t think it would have hurt even without the suit’s protection. Her hand bounced off, and she shook out her fingers.
“That’s crazy,” she said. “My fingers feel a little numb.”
Shall we demonstrate your mighty powers to these evolutionary mistakes? Smelly asked.
“I don’t think we need to—”
I’ll take that as a yes, it said.
A burst of energy radiated out of me. It lifted both Alice and Jacinto a few inches off the floor. Jacinto flew into the wall, near the dent made by the baseball bat. Alice landed on the worn leather couch. Her hair was sticking up and had gone wildly frizzy.
“I said not to do that!” I shouted at Smelly. “And I hope not to attack anyone. Isn’t that what stealth mode is for?”
It had to be tested, and they were attacking us. Violence against your oozing form is violence against me, and that cannot be tolerated.
“It’s okay,” Jacinto said as he picked himself up “Always good to understand your options.”
I wonder if it also wants to understand what the fifty thousand volts of electricity you can unleash would feel like.
“Let’s skip that,” I told Smelly.
“What about the stealth mode?” Jacinto said. “How does that work?”
