by Dani René
I need to make sure that she is completely open and willing to the therapy first. She needs to feel as though she is in control. Like she is the one showing me what she needs to heal.
“What do you know about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy?”
“What?”
“Have you ever heard of it before?”
“No.”
“It's where I work with my patients to identify harmful patterns of behavior or habits.”
She continues to sit there, looking uninterested in what I have to say.
“Starting today, we’re going to walk through a few scenarios, in a safe space, that challenge your triggers.”
That perks her up a little bit, but she still stares at me with a questioning look on her face.
“Sorry if I’m not following, but are you talking about us getting down and dirty, Dick?”
“In a sense, yes. Go ahead and lie back on the sofa for me,” I ask as I stare into her eyes intently and stalk closer to her.
“Holy fuck!” she says, “It’s like I’ve died and gone to heaven.”
“Brynn, I need you to do whatever it’s going to take for you to act like a responsible adult right now. Can you please do that for me?”
Her eyes widen at my irritation, but I seem to get my point across to her.
“I want you to close your eyes and tell me what you’re feeling. Which emotion is at the forefront of your mind?”
“Pain,” she answers after a few moments, “and sadness.”
“What is causing you to feel this way?
“I… I feel bad because of what happened with Danny and Finn.”
“What happened?”
I see her take a deep breath.
“The three of us, sometimes we, get together if you get my drift. The issue with that is, Finn and Danny don’t really like one another. But they get along well enough for me when I want them to.
“This morning, Finn and I were in the Janitor’s office, fucking, and
Danny walked in. I got him to join in, but this time, Finn wasn’t happy about it. Finn started complaining, and I rolled my eyes. Only Danny could see me, so it wouldn’t have been a big deal, except for the fact that he used it as an excuse to egg Finn on.
“Finn started to feel like we were ganging up on him a little bit, and he got aggressive. That’s when he attacked Danny.”
That isn’t where I thought the story was going. I had no idea that she was involved with Danny too. Thinking about her fucking two people here, two people who aren’t me, heightens my anger.
“If you were out in the real world, what would you do to make yourself feel better?”
“I would find someone to fuck.”
“Right, I understand that’s your go-to, but what would you do, in detail, if you could do anything to get over your feelings?”
“I would; I don’t know. I guess I would call someone? A willing fuckbuddy or maybe a client with a darker predisposition?”
“Okay, good. Now we’re getting somewhere. In situations like this, are you usually the giver or the receiver?”
“The receiver. If I am trying to forget my pain, I need someone to take it from me.”
“Okay, Brynn. Now comes the hard part. I need you to open your eyes and look at me.”
I move from my place behind the chair, so I am standing tall above her in front of the sofa.
She opens her electric blue eyes, and they’re trained on mine immediately. I offer her my hand, letting her know that I want her to stand up.
When we’re chest to chest, I place my hands on her upper arms and ready myself for what’s next.
Is she scared? Is she excited? Her pupils dilate with desire, answering my unspoken question.
“Picture yourself where you need to be, but picture me there with you. I’m here to help you, to heal you. What do you need from me?”
“I… I don’t understand, is this for real or are we role-playing?”
“It’s real if you want it to be, Brynn.”
I watch as she argues with herself trying to sort out reality from fantasy, but it’s impossible when they’re one and the same.
“The roof.”
Brynn
I have no idea what game Dr. Dick is playing, but if he’s offering me a chance to heal the way I want to, then who am I to say no. He’s the doctor, right? All I know is the way his pupils swelled with delight when he told me that this could be real if I wanted it to, spoke volumes.
Does he want it to be real?
“What’s next, Brynn?” he asks me once we’ve made it to the roof.
I look out at the scenery, and this place has never been more breathtaking. The sun is about to set, and storm clouds are rolling in the distance. It’s later in the day than I usually meet with Dr. Dick, but I missed my regular session time because I was still in the infirmary.
What is next? I look around the perimeter of the roof that I can see from where I stand. That’s when I spot it. The railing and fire escape ladder bent over the edge and down the side of the building.
“There,” I say, pointing to it.
“After you,” Dr. Dick responds.
When we get to the ladder, he looks at me questioningly.
“The worse I feel, the more dangerous I get. If I were here with someone, I would tell them to fuck me over the side of that railing, knowing how quickly we could fall to our deaths.”
“Do these men normally have an issue doing something so dangerous?”
“No, if they did, I wouldn’t have called them in the first place.”
A brief silence falls between us.
“Brynn, do you want me to help you?”
“I thought that’s what you’re doing?”
“No, I mean, do you want me to fuck you over the side of that railing?”
Of course, I want him to, but I am still trying to decide if this is all a joke, a trick, or a dream.
“Yes,” I respond, a little more breathless than I expected to be.
He holds out his hand and guides me to the ladder. When we get there, each of us waits for the other to make the first move. As much as I want to, it’s not going to be me. I’m still not convinced that this is actually happening.
Suddenly, Dr. Dick reaches out and grabs ahold of my neck. He squeezes firmly, but not painfully, and he brings my lips to his. I’m not the making out type, but I’m caught off guard, and by the time my mind catches up with my body, I realize that making out with him is not an unpleasant feeling. He guides me backward until my back and my ass hit the railing behind me.
I can’t see down, but knowing that I am right on the edge, mixed with the surprising talent of Dr. Dick’s soft, sweet tongue, I can already feel moisture pooling in between my legs.
Swiftly, his hand dives underneath the waistband of my sweatpants, and his fingertips begin to circle my clit. My hands instinctively move to his belt, and I unfasten the buckle. I make quick work of the zipper and have his dick free from his pants and boxers in no time. He inserts two fingers into my pussy, and I cry out with pleasure. He starts moving them back and forth, in and out, twisting them inside of me and driving me wild. He removes his hand from my neck and grasps my hair, pulling my head back and forcing my eyes to his.
“Brynn…” he pants.
I try to come up with something smart to say, but he shuts me up with a kiss before dropping onto his knees in front of me.
“I’ve wanted a taste of you since the first night I watched you touch yourself.”
He tugs my sweatpants down my legs and pulls down my panties. I release my hold on his dick and tear his shirt open, buttons flying everywhere. Then, I pull my tank top over my head and throw it onto the ground beside me. He runs his tongue through my slit and flicks my clit relentlessly.
“Ahhh!” I cry out.
I feel him pulling me down onto my knees, eye level with him again.
“Remember. You can trust me completely.”
I nod my head, and he uses
the fingers that he has inside of me, directing me backward until I am right at the edge of the building.
“Lay down with the top half of your body hanging over the edge. I’ll hold onto your legs. You can use the ladder’s railing if you need to hold on to something.”
My nerves are starting to kick in, and it sends a wave of pleasure running through my body.
“I’ve got you,” he says as I lower myself to the ground and backward, laying my body on the ladder against the side of the building for support.
I look out at the scenery I saw earlier. It’s gotten a little bit darker since we got up here, and the storm clouds are getting closer too. They look even more ominous upside down.
I cry out when I feel Dr. Dick’s tongue lapping at my clit once more as his fingers begin to move inside of me again. Firming up my grip on the railing of the fire escape, I try to hold on tight as I lose myself in staggering pleasure.
“Oh, yes,” I pant. “Fuck, don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t—ahhhh!!!”
He never stops as I come, and the liquid squirts into his mouth, onto his chin, all over his shirt. Some of it cascades from my pussy down my body, over my tits. I can feel it running up my neck and get lost in the strands of my hair.
I can feel pain shooting straight to the cut on my forehead, and I almost cry out, but I don’t. I never cry out in pain during sex. It’s not allowed.
Once he’s devoured me thoroughly, he reaches down and offers me a hand. He pulls me up into a seated position with his left hand while he fists his cock in his right.
“Are you okay?” he asks me.
“I’m fine, Dick,” I shoot back at him.
“Good, get up here,” he reaches down and tears me off of the ground, tossing me roughly against the railing. It was just the right amount of force.
He kicks my feet apart with his large shoe and bends me over the metal railing in front of me, so my ass is bared to him. He folds his body over mine, and the feeling of his large cock cradled in the crack of my ass is incredible. I want it inside of me. I need to feel him.
"Fuck me... please," I beg him.
"Hold onto the railing, and don't let go," he commands.
I don't usually take commands well, but when Dr. Dick says it, it makes my pussy wet. I wait for what seems like forever before I feel something hit my right ass cheek, sending burning hot flames over my skin. I turn around, about to strike when the same pain strikes my left ass cheek.
"I told you not to let go."
Another strike to each cheek.
He grabs hold of my hair and pulls me up, my back is against his hard chest.
"I'm going to fuck you like no one has ever fucked you before."
Just before I can get a smart remark out, he throws me over the railing again and shoves his fingers in my pussy. He moves them around, working the juices that are still there together with the new ones that are forming. I can feel him crouch down behind me and I turn and look, just in time to see him tongue my ass hole. He doesn’t stay there long, just enough to get it wet. When he is upright again, he presses his thumb against my opening and pushes it in. His action heightens my pleasure, and my eyes roll back into my head slightly.
He moves all of his fingers together, and I can feel another orgasm building. His other hand glides against my ass and my hip, finding its way around my body, stopping only when he lands on my pussy.
“Brynn…” he leans over me, “I want you to come for me. Come for me the way you came the first night we met.”
I remove one hand from the railing so I can grab onto his dick, but his fingers leave my clit immediately, and he grabs me around my wrist.
“I said, don’t let go, and when I tell you to do something, you listen. I want your hand on my cock more than you can understand. But right now, this is about you.”
He places my hand back on the rail in front of me. Turning my head to meet his stare, I don’t know what to think. Is he acting this way because I’m his patient, and this is my therapy? Or is he acting this way because he genuinely wants to pleasure me? What does he expect in return? He told me that he is going to fuck me like I’ve never been fucked before. Is he thinking to himself that there isn’t anything I wouldn’t give to him because that’s just the kind of slut that I am? Is he thinking of evil and twisted ways for me to return the favor?
“Brynn, where did you go?”
His hand returns to my pussy, and he begins his ministrations once more.
“Part of CBT is talking about your feelings as you go through an experience. I won’t stop what I’m doing, but you need to tell me what you’re feeling.”
His fingers speed up, and my eyes close as a wave of bliss washes over my body again.
“I… I don’t know what you expect from me.”
“I told you, I just want you to tell me what is going on in your head.”
“No… I…” it’s getting hard for me to concentrate on how I felt a moment ago with his masterful hands tormenting me the way they are. “I meant I want to know what you’re expecting in return for making me come.”
His fingers slow slightly.
“Look at me, Brynn.”
I look at him, still uneasy following his orders.
“All I want is to make you feel good. I want you to be yourself, but I don't want you in any danger anymore."
I'm not sure how to take that. I'm not used to someone caring for me in that way. Why does he? He doesn't even know me.
I nod my head, and he quickens his movements once more.
"Then I feel... excited, hot, horny as fuck!"
"Good, let yourself enjoy this. Stop thinking, and just feel."
He speeds up again, and in no time, he has my knees weakening. I feel like I am melting into a puddle on the ground.
He stands behind me, again, with his chest to my back, and he helps to hold me in place. Kissing my neck, he makes his way to my shoulder and takes a small, harmless bite. But fuck if it didn’t awaken my body again. I remove my hand from the railing in front of me and curl my arm around the back of his neck. I lean my head back on his shoulder. He removes his fingers from me, and his hands trace the outline of my torso, landing on my tits. He pinches my nipples, lightly, between his fingers.
“Mmm,” I moan.
“How are you feeling? Sad? Anxious?” he asks, before whispering, “Dangerous?”
“Not sad,” I say in between another moan.
“Good,” he answers and kisses my neck softly.
I tense up a little at the intimacy of his kiss. I don’t fuck for any reason even remotely related to love or affection. I wait for Dr. Dick to say something about it, but he doesn’t. I highly doubt he missed it; he’s way too intuitive for that. A second later, his hands pick up mine and guide them back to the railing.
“Don’t let go.”
He tugs me backward by my hips, gently. Fingering my pussy from behind once again, he awakens another orgasm from deep within me. I’m caught off-guard by two sharp smacks to my ass, timed just right with a lightning bolt shooting across the sky. The hypnotizing light flashes in my vision and pulls me in.
Just as the rolling sound of thunder begins, Dr. Dick enters me from behind. He isn’t gentle to start, but he doesn’t go full thrust either.
It’s perfect, and I hate it.
It reminds me of the one and only time I’ve ever had an emotional, sexual encounter with someone else. I wasn’t there to use him; he wasn’t there to use me. We’d bonded for weeks before that moment. Something else I don’t do anymore. I don’t make friends. I have no use for them, and nobody can stomach me long enough to want to keep me around.
After we made love, I thought that I could possibly see myself with him. That I could give my life a big “Fuck You” and finally be normal. Until he found out that I was an escort, called me a slut, and told me he never wanted to see me again.
Will Dr. Dick feel that way about me after this?
“Brynn… let yourself feel,” Dr.
Dick says.
I shake my head gently to clear it all out. Another roll of thunder begins, closer this time.
“I’m okay,” I pant, and he starts thrusting into me harder.
Once he picks up speed, the mixture of the ground far beneath us and the lightning crawling across the sky, growing closer to us with each flash, makes my orgasm pick up speed.
Dr. Dick’s thrusts are coming faster now, and my body is vibrating with an unshed orgasm in no time.
“Fuck, yes! Don’t stop; please don’t stop!” I beg him.
“Let go, Brynn,” he says, and he removes my hands from the railing in front of me. My head is between the ladder, looking down at the ground. All that’s keeping me from falling is Dr. Dick.
It’s exhilarating.
It’s terrifying.
It’s everything I’ve been searching for.
Fucking me harder and harder, I feel like I could fall over the ledge any second, literally and figuratively.
His grip is tight, and it bites into my skin. My wrists will likely be bruised tomorrow, and I revel in the idea of it. Picturing the marks that he will leave behind is the final straw. As a mighty clap of thunder mixes with the closest, brightest lightning bolt yet, Dr. Dick pushes me over the edge.
I scream as my orgasm tears through me. I fight to hold on and keep myself from toppling off the edge of the roof, but I needn’t have.
For the first time in my life, there is someone here who will catch me if I fall.
“I’ve got you, shhh…”
All of a sudden, I’m being pelted in the face by raindrops. I hear Dr. Dick speaking, but I don’t remember sitting down on the roof.
“What happened?” I asked him.
“You fainted mid-orgasm. Are you okay?”
“Yes. Yes, I’m fine.”
I wiggle out of his hold and grab my soaking wet clothing from the ground. Pulling them on as I walk, I don’t stop when I get to the door leading me back inside. I don’t stop when I get to the bottom of the stairs on the third floor. I don’t stop until I get to the showers where I turn the hot water up and wash away today’s “session” from my body.
