Pat Boone Fan Club

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Pat Boone Fan Club Page 23

by Sue William Silverman


  SUE CONFUSED GIRL REPORTER debates, not for the first time, the pros and cons of real people talking to fictional characters as well as real people who are fictionalized on pieces of comic-strip paper. Besides, she herself struggles with double-identity issues, having contracted this condition by existing, as it were, both inside and outside the pages of the comic book. SUE BLOODHOUND GIRL REPORTER now, for the first time, considers the danger, when all is said and done, of such an existence. Would individual lives—and even the universe—be clarified by choosing one or the other? She flips through the DC comic looking at images of the young, innocent, future-before-him Pat Boone, fans swooning after his performance at the Rialto.

  SUE ABLE-TO-PREDICT-THE-FUTURE GIRL REPORTER now realizes that the exact moment he, Pat Boone, steps from the pages of the comic book—once he has free will—once he’s able to speak his own mind, no longer controlled, as it were, by Jerome “Jerry” Siegel, then the proverbial #%&**# will hit the fan.

  Siegel, creator and main writer of Superman comics, the son of Jewish immigrants from Lithuania no less, knows, after all, a thing or two about changing identities. He was also known, at times, by his less-Jewish-sounding pseudonyms Joe Carter and Jerry Ess and was, ironically, POSTHUMOUSLY inducted into the Will Eisner Comic Book Hall of Fame in 1992 and the Jack Kirby Hall of Fame in 1993. But only posthumously. So maybe he also knows a thing or two about hall of fame conspiracies and snubs?!

  In short, the only solution for Pat Boone to be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is to cloak his true, conservative Christian identity by remaining inside the pages of the comic book, consorting with ever-popular superheroes, where the future is knowable, where GOOD DEFEATS EVIL, or where Siegel and Superman will predictably map out his future. A future where it always remains the 1950s, always celebrates Pat Boone’s red-white-and-true-blue America. Where Pat Boone won’t get embroiled with hippies, the British invasion, hard rockers . . . where he’ll never even meet Sarah Palin or be clutched to the heaving chests of the Birthers, the Tea Partiers, etc., etc., etc.

  But Pat Boone, as if reading SUE WHO-WEARS-HER-HEART-ON-HER-SLEEVE GIRL REPORTER’s mind, looks determined. “I yam what I yam,” he proclaims.

  Aren’t we all?

  Aren’t we all just superheroes but afraid to dash into the first phone booth we find, strip off our ordinary clothes, reveal our true, human selves, and speed-dial heaven? I mean, just try to even find a phone booth anymore.

  Pat Boone stands as if to make a move, to step outside the comfy confines of the comic book. Sue, despite having looked up to, and needing, Pat Boone for years, now feels as if she is the one who needs to lend a helping hand to Pat Boone, to grasp his hand, pull him back inside the comic book, where time, blessedly, stands still, where no one ages or changes.

  “I want to matter,” Pat Boone confesses, putting one foot outside the margins of the comic book . . . and right on a banana peel.

  SUE, whose role as GIRL REPORTER dwindles to an end, solemnly turns to the final page.

  Encore

  After the election of Barack Obama as president, I dream I’m wandering a beach in Florida with Pat Boone. We reach a swampy inlet of water that we must cross in order to continue on. I’m not wearing shoes and worry I’ll be bitten by an alligator. Pat lifts me, safely carrying me to the opposite shore.

  “I’ve been in love with you since junior high school, you know,” I say to him when he sets me down.

  He nods. “I haven’t known you, though.”

  “The Republicans lost the election because they lost their way trying to keep Terri Schiavo alive.” I refer to politicians who sued to keep this brain-dead woman on life support, against her husband’s wishes. I didn’t watch the Republican convention, but I read on the Internet that Pat Boone attended it.

  “But what did you expect them to do?” he says. “Just let her die?”

  The Florida sun reflects off sand and water. I look up at him, though it’s difficult to see his features in this dazzling halo.

  “What would you do to keep me alive?” I whisper.

  For you, he says, I would iron the night.

  About the Author

  Sue William Silverman’s memoir, Love Sick: One Woman’s Journey through Sexual Addiction, is also a Lifetime television movie. Her memoir, Because I Remember Terror, Father, I Remember You, won the Association of Writers and Writing Programs Award for Creative Nonfiction. She is also the author of Fearless Confessions: A Writer’s Guide to Memoir, teaches at Vermont College of Fine Arts, and is a professional speaker (suewilliamsilverman.com).

  In the American Lives Series

  Fault Line

  by Laurie Alberts

  Pieces from Life’s Crazy Quilt

  by Marvin V. Arnett

  Songs from the Black Chair: A Memoir of Mental Illness

  by Charles Barber

  This Is Not the Ivy League: A Memoir

  by Mary Clearman Blew

  Body Geographic

  by Barrie Jean Borich

  Driving with Dvořák: Essays on Memory and Identity

  by Fleda Brown

  Searching for Tamsen Donner

  by Gabrielle Burton

  Island of Bones: Essays

  by Joy Castro

  American Lives: A Reader

  edited by Alicia Christensen

  introduced by Tobias Wolff

  Out of Joint: A Private and Public Story of Arthritis

  by Mary Felstiner

  Descanso for My Father: Fragments of a Life

  by Harrison Candelaria Fletcher

  Weeds: A Farm Daughter’s Lament

  by Evelyn I. Funda

  Falling Room

  by Eli Hastings

  Opa Nobody

  by Sonya Huber

  Hannah and the Mountain: Notes toward a Wilderness Fatherhood

  by Jonathan Johnson

  Local Wonders: Seasons inthe Bohemian Alps

  by Ted Kooser

  Bigger than Life: A Murder, a Memoir

  by Dinah Lenney

  What Becomes You

  by Aaron Raz Link and Hilda Raz

  Such a Life

  by Lee Martin

  Turning Bones

  by Lee Martin

  In Rooms of Memory: Essays

  by Hilary Masters

  Between Panic and Desire

  by Dinty W. Moore

  Sleep in Me

  by Jon Pineda

  Works Cited: An Alphabetical Odyssey of Mayhem and Misbehavior

  by Brandon R. Schrand

  Thoughts from a Queen-Sized Bed

  by Mimi Schwartz

  My Ruby Slippers: Finding Place on the Road Back to Kansas

  by Tracy Seeley

  The Fortune Teller’s Kiss

  by Brenda Serotte

  Gang of One: Memoirs of a Red Guard

  by Fan Shen

  Just Breathe Normally

  by Peggy Shumaker

  Scraping By in the Big Eighties

  by Natalia Rachel Singer

  In the Shadow of Memory

  by Floyd Skloot

  Secret Frequencies: A New York Education

  by John Skoyles

  The Days Are Gods

  by Liz Stephens

  Phantom Limb

  by Janet Sternburg

  Yellowstone Autumn: A Season of Discovery in a Wondrous Land

  by W. D. Wetherell

  To order or obtain more information on these or other University of Nebraska Press titles, visit www.nebraskapress.unl.edu.

  Also by Sue William Silverman

  Memoir

  Because I Remember Terror, Father, I Remember You (Winner of the Association for Writers and Writing Programs Award Series)

  Love Sick: One Woman’s Journey through Sexual Addiction

  Poetry

  Hieroglyphics in Neon

  Craft

  Fearless Confessions: A Writer’s Guide to Memoir

  Connect with Sue at
www.SueWilliamSilverman.com

  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SueWilliamSilverman

  Twitter: SueSilverman

 

 

 


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