“He was supposed to make so much progress at that place. Their therapies were supposed to bring my brother back to me. They did teach him to walk again, but the rest…he still can’t talk, still doesn’t understand the difference between reality and fantasy. The doctors say that he lives in a perpetual fantasy world, so far out of touch that he doesn’t even register what’s going on around him.”
“But they think they can help him?”
“They used to. I don’t know if they still do. Juan hasn’t let me talk to the doctors in a year and Donny—that guy there at the drugstore?—he only knows so much. He’s just a nurse’s aide who helps take care of the patients.”
“Why won’t Juan let you talk to your brother or his doctors?”
“He doesn’t want me around anyone he can’t control. He’s afraid I’ll spill some of his secrets.”
There was bitterness in her voice. In fact, I was beginning to notice there was a lot of bitterness in her voice whenever she mentioned Alvarez.
“You met him at the restaurant?”
“Yeah. He came to the kitchen a couple of times a week to make sure things were going smoothly. Everyone was always on their best behavior whenever he was there. The girls all threw themselves at him, the guys tried to show off how professional and masculine they were. It was kind of crazy, to be honest. And then, three years after I started there, he suddenly looked at me and asked me to dinner in front of everyone. He never even knew my name until that moment.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “You have no idea how that made me feel.”
I had an idea, actually. I remembered how it made me feel when Miranda singled me out from the rest of the guys in my squad. It was like being chosen first for the dodge ball team in sixth grade or winning first place in the talent show.
“It must have been pretty good. You married the guy.”
She inclined her head slightly. “I did.” She pushed her plate away, her eyes moving over the dishes on the table to the dishes on the counter and the dishes in the sink. “I guess we should clean up.”
“You’re not hungry?”
She shook her head as she climbed to her feet. That cloud of defeat was over her head again, bowing her shoulders and slowing her movements. I followed her to the sink and worked in silence beside her, scrubbing pots and sliding plates into the dishwasher. She was so quiet the whole time that I could feel the weight of the silence weighing on my shoulders.
She seemed exhausted when we went upstairs. She went straight to the bedroom, leaving the door open between her private quarters and the sitting room. I stood in the doorway and watched her move around the room, grabbing a t-shirt to sleep in before ducking into the bathroom. When she came out again, her dark hair fell nearly to her waist, freed from its braid. There was a slight wave to it, but it was mostly straight, thick, and silky. I wanted to touch it; I could almost feel its fine strands between my fingers. Instead, I slipped my hands into my back jeans pockets.
“Goodnight,” I called as she climbed into her bed.
She curled up, pulling her pillow tight under her head. “Aren’t you sleeping in here tonight?”
I shrugged. “I thought I’d stretch out on the couch. More comfortable.”
I could see her eyebrows arch. “Yeah? You think you can trust me to stay put for the night?”
“I certainly hope so. Don’t really feel like going for a run tonight.”
She smiled. “Yeah, me either.”
I left the bedroom door cracked, then settled on the couch, sliding my shoes and my jacket off. I unhooked my shoulder holster and carefully set it—gun and all—on the chair to my right before stretching out on the narrow couch. It was more comfortable than I expected, much more so than the chair in her bedroom. But it would never match the comfort of my bed back at the compound.
I don’t know how long I’d been asleep when I heard a phone ring. I automatically reached for my cell, but it hadn’t rung. I thought that maybe it was just part of my dream, so I settled back down. I was just about to drift off again when I heard the slight creak of a door closing.
Every alarm in my body started going off. I sat up and turned to the windows, scanning the dark garden. Almost immediately I spotted her, white t-shirt glowing in the moonlight, running toward the back gate.
Fuck me! Not again!
I slipped on my shoes and rushed after her, running at top speed along the trail she’d taken the last time. I caught up to her between a line of rose bushes, snatching the back of her t-shirt and jerking her to the ground. I stumbled over her, falling almost on top of her, missing by a hair crushing her with my full body weight.
“What are you doing?!” I demanded. “Where do you think you’re going in the middle of the damn night?”
“Let me go!” she cried, pushing at my shoulders and slapping at my chest.
“Not until you tell me what the fuck you’re up to!”
“Look who’s using that word now!”
I stared at her, trying to decide what I wanted to do more: strangle her or kiss her.
Tears started to run down her cheeks. She turned her head away so that I couldn’t see her face. I brushed the tears off the cheek facing me, letting my fingers linger slightly longer than necessary.
“I can’t help you if you don’t trust me.”
“Like you would ever help me. You work for Juan.”
“I work for Gray Wolf. And, at the moment, neither one is here.”
She shook her head, as though denying everything I’d just said. “You don’t trust me. I don’t trust you. We’re just strangers trying to coexist.”
“Is that right? Do you have anyone else around here to help you?”
She finally looked at me, but it was to glare up at me. “You want to know where I was going? Fine!” She spit the word out like it was a curse. “I was on my way to the institute where Jimmy is. Donny called, said he’s having some sort of fit. He said seeing me upset him, drew him out of his fantasy world and now they can’t control him.”
“I’m sorry.”
“You’re sorry? That’s going to do me a whole lot of good.”
“Why didn’t you just come wake me up?”
“Would you done anything? Would you have taken me over there?”
“You won’t know till you try.”
She stared at me, her breathing quickening for a moment, forcing her breasts hard up against my chest. I’d almost forgotten how close we were, how the length of my body was pressed against hers in the soft grass of the garden. But I couldn’t forget now. Every breath she took pushed her chest harder against mine. Every breath I took pushed my body closer to hers. And the back of my fingers were on her cheek, my hand pressed against her arm. And her lips were just a breath from mine.
She studied my face, her mouth softening enough that the thin worry lines around them began to disappear.
“Would you take me to the institute?”
“Yes.”
Her eyes narrowed with doubt. Clearly it had been a long time since she’d met someone she could trust. But then she smiled.
“Really?”
There was something about the joy that suddenly washed over her face, the smile and the light in her eyes. Something that made all thought disappear from my head, that gave room for instinct to take over. And it didn’t help that there had been some sort of sexual tension building between us from the moment we set eyes on each other.
I brushed the corner of her mouth with my thumb. She didn’t turn away even when my thumb slid over her bottom lip, pulling it down just slightly. Not only did she not turn away, but she also ran her hand over my upper arm before gripping it and pulling me closer to her.
Our lips brushed. Just the slightest touch. There was electricity in that single touch, power that pulled me into her, that made me want to devour her. I pressed my lips against hers, loving the soft feel of her beautiful, full lips. And when she parted them ever so slightly, I took full advantage. I wanted to taste every inch o
f her, starting here. She responded, her movements slow and shy, but clearly on the same page.
I slid my hand down the length of her body, brushing the side of her breast before tugging at her hip, encouraging her to fold into me, to mold her body against mine. She moaned softly against my mouth, her own hand sliding up my arm and back down, pressing my hand harder against her hip. We kissed deeply, almost roughly, her kiss keeping right up with mine. But there was this shyness about her touch, this hesitance that seemed born out of inexperience. And that was an odd thought since this was a woman who was married, a woman who should have been as experienced as I was, if not more. But there was this sense of innocence…maybe it was just wishful thinking on my part.
There was definitely nothing innocent about her tight, round ass. And she didn’t hesitate when it came to pressing her hips against mine, when it felt good to encourage my touch against her inner thigh.
I slipped my hand under her t-shirt and—oh, the feel of her silky skin against my palm! I wanted her. There was no doubt in my mind that if it weren’t for that little voice of logic that began to scream in the back of my mind, that little voice that reminded me over and over again that this was a married woman and, therefore, forbidden fruit, I might have taken her right there and then. She wasn’t protesting. But that voice was there, telling me what a hypocrite I was, taking advantage of another man’s wife after everything Miranda had done to me.
I pulled her hands from my body, pushing myself up to a sitting position.
“We’ve got to stop.”
That hot blush was back on her face. She immediately sat up, her back to me.
“I’m sorry,” she said so softly I almost couldn’t hear her.
“We should go.”
She snapped around, her eyes moving over me. “You’re still going to take me?”
“I said I would.”
She jumped to her feet before I could change my mind, nearly to the back porch of the house before I was even on my feet. I followed, wondering what the hell I was getting myself into.
Again.
Chapter 7
Brooks
The taste of him was still on my lips as we walked into the institute. I absently pressed a finger against them, wondering at the ironies of life. My first real kiss and it came from the bodyguard my husband of two years had hired. How many women could say that?
Donny was waiting at the front desk, the anxiety clear on his face.
“They’re about to sedate him.”
He turned and led the way down the hall. I could feel Elliott behind me, the power of his presence making me feel safe and frightened all at the same time. I had to put him out of my head and put what had happened in the garden into a box to be opened and explored at a later date. Right now, the only thing that mattered was Jimmy.
There was chaos in the small patient room. Four or five nurses and doctors were scattered around the room, watching as Jimmy paced on the hospital gurney that served as his bed. He was tugging at his hair, grunting things that no one could understand. There was an expression of confusion on his face, the first true expression of emotion I’d seen on his face since he woke from the coma after his accident.
“Jimmy?”
He jerked around, his eyes falling on my face. Then he crumbled, first his expression, then his body. He fell onto the mattress, sobs shaking his body.
I went to him, sliding my hand over his shoulder as I gripped his chin.
“Hey, Jimmy.”
He threw his arms around me so suddenly that I nearly fell backward. Elliott was there to catch me, his hands on my hips keeping me steady. Jimmy sobbed against my shoulder, hard, thick tears that came with all the ugliness that often accompanied a good cry. I stroked the back of his head the way I used to when he was a child. He wouldn’t let me do this since he was twelve, so it was nice. And the fact that I hadn’t really seen him in the last year…it was so nice. It was soul-reaffirming nice.
The crowd in the room slowly started to drift off when they saw that he was calming down. The doctor—Dr. Forman—stayed behind, watching us. And Donny. He lingered near the door, a self-satisfied smile on his lips.
Like a child, Jimmy fell into an exhausted sleep. I lay him back against his pillows and pulled the blankets up to his chin. He peeked at me, a dreamy smile touching his lips.
“Books…” he mumbled.
“It’s me, Bubba. I’m here.”
His smiled widened, even as his eyes slid shut again.
I brushed his dark hair out of his face, letting my fingers linger against the roughness of his five o’clock shadow. His mind may have slipped back to toddlerhood, but his body was still that of a twenty-year-old man.
“He recognized you,” Dr. Forman said.
I glanced at her. “I suppose he did.”
“That’s the first connection he’s made with the real world in all the time he’s been here. I’d surely like to know what set it off.”
I glanced at Donny. He backed out of the doorway, clearly not comfortable with admitting the truth. But Dr. Forman didn’t have to hear it aloud to know it as fact.
“There was a chance meeting, perhaps?”
I looked at her, but I didn’t admit or deny anything.
She simply nodded, her eyes moving to Jimmy’s face. “This is important to his recovery. I’d like if you could come by the facility tomorrow afternoon, about two? We could have a session, see how he responds to you under more controlled conditions.”
I glanced at Elliott. He nodded.
“We can be here.”
“Great.” Dr. Forman glanced at her watch. “Now, if you’ll forgive me, it’s late and I have rounds in a few hours. I would love to have a meeting with my pillow.”
She ducked out of the room, pausing briefly to pat Donny on the shoulder. I caressed Jimmy’s face one more time, then turned to Donny myself.
“I can’t thank you enough.”
He came over, sliding a paper card into my hand. “I got more minutes for the phone. I figured you were running low.”
I reached up and kissed his cheek. “Thanks.”
He blushed a little, making it a little obvious why he was going so far out of his way to help me. He tossed a cautious glance at Elliott, nodding politely before he turned and left in the doctor’s wake.
Elliott took my elbow. “Ready?”
I nodded, but I turned back to Jimmy first, pressing a kiss to his forehead. Then I let Elliott guide me out of the building.
“He gave you a prepaid cell phone?”
We were halfway home before he finally asked the question. I glanced over at him, watching his strong hands work on the steering wheel, his powerful thighs moving with the slight movement of his feet. I couldn’t bring myself to look at his face, to remember the feel of his lips on mine. I involuntarily touched my lips again, obsessed with the taste of him, the feel of him.
“About six months ago, back when Juan was still letting me go do my own shopping, I ran into him at that drugstore where we saw him today? I recognized the logo of the institute on his shirt. I managed to slip away from the bodyguard with me that day—I think that was Rafael, but I’m not sure—and I told him who I was, told him that Juan had cut me off from the doctors and the institute. The phone was his idea so that we could talk more.”
“Don’t you have a cell phone?”
“Juan won’t allow it.”
“You’re a grown woman. Can’t you buy yourself one?”
I glanced at him. “You really don’t get it, do you?” I touched the bruises on my wrists, fully formed now and turning a lovely shade of purple around the edges. “Juan thinks that I have information that, if it got out, could really screw him in his business dealings. He won’t let me out of the house, won’t let me go on the internet. He won’t let me communicate with anyone outside of his control.”
“What do you know?”
I snorted softly, remembering the afternoon, a little more than a year ago, when
I walked in on him in his office. Before that, I’d had more freedom. Not as many as I would have liked, but I could roam the house and cook whenever the mood struck. But all that ended that afternoon.
“Juan’s got a few proclivities that are not openly accepted by some people, especially in the so called ‘Bible Belt.’”
Elliott frowned. “What does that mean?”
I just shrugged. I couldn’t exactly say it out loud, and if he couldn’t guess…I looked over at him again, my eyes lingering on his thighs.
“Thanks for taking me to the institute.”
“Will you come talk to me next time?”
I nodded. “I will. I promise.”
“Don’t make promises,” he said, waving his hand a little as he slowed the SUV to pull into the driveway. “Promises only get people into trouble.”
“Sounds like the famous last words of a divorced man.”
“Yeah, well, I guess I would know.”
There was an undertone to his words that made me wonder what his ex-wife did to break him so badly. Not only did he not believe in promises, but his jaw also clinched every time I mentioned anything that might remotely have something to do with marriage. She’d clearly hurt him.
“You know so much about me and my marriage. What about you and yours?”
He glanced at me, as he pulled the SUV to a stop at the front of the house. “What about it?”
“How long were you married? Why did it end? Do you still see her?”
He shut off the ignition and sat back in the seat for a moment, his thoughts clearly turning.
“We were married three years. No, I don’t see her anymore, haven’t seen her since I walked out. And ended because…” He hesitated, making me wonder how much fault he took on his own shoulders for what had happened. “It ended because I was fool enough to believe she could be the person I thought she was, but I was wrong.”
“She cheated on you?” I guessed.
He climbed out of the SUV, slamming the door hard enough to make it rock. I waited for him to come to my side of the vehicle, but he didn’t. He stormed up to the front door, never once looking back to see if I was following him. But I did follow like the good little girl I was. I’d always done the right thing; I’d always the thing that I knew people expected me to do. I went to school every day, even when my mom was sick and would have preferred to have my company. I even went to school the day after her funeral because I didn’t know what else to do with myself. I stepped up and took over the housekeeping duties and the meal preparation at home when my dad went back to work. I helped Jimmy with his homework and helped him apply to every university from here to New York and back again. I even stood up in court and took guardianship of my brother—two years my junior but three inches taller than me—after our dad’s sudden death. And when he wanted to ride in that dirt bike race as a nod toward our dad on the anniversary of his death, I signed the financial waivers the track required. And, after the accident, I worked my ass off to get the hospital bills paid, to get Jimmy the best care we could afford—which wasn’t much. And then I married a man I barely knew in order to get Jimmy into the facility he was in now.
CONTROLLING BROOKS (Gray Wolf Security Book 4) Page 5
