by Juno Dawson
‘No. It’s not that.’ I take a monumentally deep breath and begin. ‘Margot, I really hope you’re not going to be cross with me.’
‘Your tone suggests I almost certainly will be, but go on.’
‘I’ve been late home because I’ve been at the library using the Internet.’ I hand her the pink wallet. ‘OK, here goes. Look, I remembered the name of your midwife – Trudy Mayhew – and I did some digging. You know, birth certificates and that. I found out that all adopted babies had to be registered, even if it didn’t state the birth parent’s names.’
Margot leafs through the documents I’ve given her. Her hands are shaking, but she says nothing. Oh God, if she’s going to be angry, I just want it over with.
‘Here’s the thing. I had the date, and I knew Trudy’s name, and it was enough. She even logged the birth as “Baby Christopher”. It was a start. Then I went to a charity … they’re called Family Detectives … and they try to trace people’s birth parents.’
Margot finally looks up at me, her face ashen. ‘Felicity, what are you trying to say?’
Deep breath. ‘Margot, he’s looking for you.’ I just about keep my voice steady. ‘Christopher. Well, he’s called Giles, but he tried to trace you about ten years ago. Your family hid you pretty well, and obviously he didn’t have the details I had –’ Margot’s hand flies up to cover her mouth – ‘but he wants to be found.’
The pink wallet falls to the paving stones with a slap and the papers scatter. Margot says nothing for a moment before her breathing starts to quiver and shake. Her shoulders crumple inwards. ‘My Christopher? You found my Christopher?’
I nod, still not quite sure if she’s happy or livid.
And then the first tear escapes her eye. ‘Oh, Fliss. I never thought … I thought I’d never …’
‘It’s OK,’ I say. I take both her hands, because I don’t imagine we’ll ever be the hugging type. She squeezes them. I look her dead in the eye. ‘Just let yourself feel it,’ I say.
Margot covers her eyes with her hands and weeps. She rests her head on my shoulder and lets herself cry in the rose garden where no one else will ever know but me.
Acknowledgements
Thank you, as ever, to the whole wonderful team at Hot Key Books and Bonnier Zaffre, especially Emma Matthewson and Jane Harris. Thanks also to Jo Williamson and Sallyanne Sweeney.
Since the conception of Margot & Me in 2015 there have been fairly obvious changes in my life, and my family and friends have been wonderful at keeping everything normal. Thank you to old friends who’ve known me since the start and to new friends, especially the teams at Booktrust, Glamour and Attitude Magazine, and Stonewall UK.
Thank you Non Pratt and Lisa Williamson for your feedback.
Once again, love to all my readers old and new. I knew you’d be cool, and you were.
Juno x
Juno Dawson
Queen of Teen 2014 Juno Dawson is the multi award-winning author of dark teen thrillers Hollow Pike, Cruel Summer, Say Her Name and Under My Skin, written under the name James Dawson. In 2015, she released her first contemporary romance, All of The Above. Her first non-fiction book, Being A Boy, tackled puberty, sex and relationships, and a follow-up for young LGBT people, This Book Is Gay, came out in 2014.
Juno is a regular contributor to Attitude, GT, Glamour and the Guardian and has contributed to news items concerning sexuality, identity, literature and education on the BBC’s Woman’s Hour, Front Row, This Morning and Newsnight. She is a School Role Model for the charity Stonewall, and also works with charity First Story to visit schools serving low income communities. Juno’s titles have received rave reviews and her books have been translated into more than ten languages.
In 2015, Juno announced her transition to become a woman, having lived thus far as the male author James Dawson. She writes full time and lives in Brighton. Follow Juno on Twitter: @junodawson or on Facebook at Juno Dawson Books.
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First published in Great Britain in 2017 by
HOT KEY BOOKS
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Copyright © Juno Dawson, 2017
All rights reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
The right of Juno Dawson to be identified as Author of this work has been asserted by them in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act, 1988
This is a work of fiction. Names, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
ISBN: 9781499861853
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