by Renee Roman
“How about we start with coffee, and if we survive that, we’ll see what comes next?”
Ari ignored the heat in her face and looked at the selection, including specialty drinks. There were so many to choose from she had no idea what she wanted and decided to have whatever Hudson was having.
“What’s your pleasure?”
Hudson’s eyebrow shot up. “It’s a little soon to be asking for details, don’t you think?”
Ari slapped Hudson’s arm. “I meant coffee. What kind of coffee?” She dropped her gaze and shoved her hands back in her jeans. Flirting wasn’t something she was comfortable with, especially when she kept telling herself she wasn’t going to go there with Hudson. Then why do I keep going there?
* * *
Hudson hadn’t meant to insinuate there’d be more than a casual friendship between them, but the color rising from Ari’s neckline made her wonder if the idea wasn’t as farfetched as she thought. She stifled the sigh that almost escaped. She was getting way ahead of herself. It was only coffee. Nothing more. At least that’s what she kept telling herself.
They sat across from each other at one of the small outdoor tables. Hudson eyed Ari as she fidgeted with the lid on her coffee, nearly spilling the hot beverage onto both of them. Ari was nervous, and she wasn’t sure why. She decided to try to put her at ease.
“So what do you do besides swim and have coffee with strangers?”
Ari snorted. The lopsided grin let her know Ari got the joke. “I work at a medical billing office and I also hostess at a local restaurant.” She inhaled the rich aroma of her mocha latte and sipped.
Hudson admired Ari’s long eyelashes and creamy, smooth complexion. “We have something in common.” Ari’s gaze met hers. “Aside from the Y, I’m an independent accountant.”
Ari sat up with renewed interest. “Really? So you do bookkeeping and such?”
“Among other things, like audits and filing taxes.”
“What do you do for fun?”
The question seemed innocent enough, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to share more than the usual pleasantries expressed among virtual strangers. “A little of this and a little of that.” Hudson took the lid off her coffee cup and sprinkled in a little cinnamon. “Any secrets you care to share?”
Ari fidgeted and looked down the brick path to the street.
“I didn’t mean to pry.” She reached across the short space and gently covered Ari’s hand with her own. “Are you okay?”
Ari took a deep breath. “That obvious?” She leaned back and met her gaze. “I have an ulterior motive for calling you.”
Hudson panicked. All her fears about seeing Ari again rose to the surface, threatening her idea of being just friends.
Alarm showed on Ari’s face. “It’s not what you think.”
“How do you know what I’m thinking?”
Ari jerked back as though she’d been slapped, then stood. “This was a bad idea.”
Hudson couldn’t let her go. Not like this. She grasped Ari’s arm, and Ari yanked it away before facing her.
“I don’t know why I reacted like that,” Hudson said. Would she ever be able to have a normal relationship? Did she even know what normal would feel like? And why was she worrying about any of that now? She hadn’t intended to lash out. “Please give me another chance.”
Ari pointed to their abandoned cups. “Let’s finish our coffee.”
After they sat, Hudson spoke first. “Ghosts of Christmas past.”
“What?”
“It’s a long story for another time. So…what motive did you have for calling?”
“Are you still looking for an apartment?”
“Yes. Why?”
“I have one. Well, I’ll have one to rent soon. When I saw it, I thought of you and figured you were probably the handy type.”
It was Hudson’s turn to have a little fun. “You mean you didn’t call me because of my charming ways?” Ari nearly choked on a mouthful of coffee. While she tried to recover, Hudson pushed the envelope. “And just what type is a handy type?”
“You know.”
Hudson shook her head. “No.”
Ari groaned in frustration. “You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?”
Hudson remained silent, and Ari sighed.
“Butch.” Ari picked up her cup and studied the contents, determined to look anywhere but in Hudson’s direction.
Hudson broke out in laughter.
“That’s not funny,” Ari said before she broke down and joined her. For a few minutes, she couldn’t stop laughing. Tears ran down her face. She wiped her eyes.
Hudson forced herself to concentrate so she wouldn’t start laughing again. “Why me?” She needed to know if Ari had a secret agenda. The kind she was desperate to avoid. It all came down to a matter of trust.
“You seem trustworthy. Someone I won’t have to worry about being on the property. That’s what I need. Lord knows I’ve enough to think about. You said you needed a place to live. I think you said, ‘A space of your own’ or something along those lines. You can have it, if you want.”
A myriad of emotions churned behind the carefully constructed calm veneer Hudson tried to display. Her jaw muscles tightened. She struggled over what should have been an easy answer. Yes or no. But the demons got in the way. It was a monumental moment. One Hudson didn’t want to make a rash decision about. It was true she was desperate to have her own place. Somewhere to call home. Did that mean she should jump on Ari’s offer? She believed they shared a mutual attraction that bubbled under the surface. It could erupt. Then what? Move again? Run away because…Stop. I’m overthinking this. Still, she needed to give the idea careful consideration. If she said yes it would be a commitment, and she needed to be sure if she were ever going to make another one. She stood and tossed her empty cup.
“Would you mind taking a walk?”
Ari hesitated. “Okay.”
“I think better when I’m moving.”
Ari picked up her cup. “Lead the way.”
After walking and weighing the pros and cons, Hudson pointed to a bench. “First, I really appreciate you thinking of me.” Nothing she was about to tell Ari was easy. “The past year has been rough. I’m not sure I’m the best person to count on.”
“It was presumptuous of me…” Ari began.
Hudson placed the tips of her fingers against Ari’s mouth. “Let me finish. Please. I need to see the space and go over details with you. I think we need to be sure the arrangement will work for both of us.”
“Of course. That’s a great idea.” Ari sounded excited. “The house is in a great neighborhood, and there’s plenty of room. You’ll see.” Ari waved her hand. It hit the rim of her cup, and the last of her coffee flew through the air, showering them both with brown droplets.
Hudson looked down at their clothes. Shock was the best way to describe Ari’s face. That, along with the color blooming on her cheeks, indicated how embarrassed she was. How could Hudson be upset?
“I give up,” Ari cried out, close to tears. “All I’ve wanted to do was put my best foot forward, and I’ve done nothing but show you what a total klutz I am.” She searched her pockets and came up with a couple of crumpled napkins.
Ari dabbed at the spots on Hudson’s white shirt, looking mortified the entire time. When it came to the spots on her chest, she couldn’t help but laugh as Ari froze in mid-air, not daring to go any further. Ari shoved the napkins forward.
“Here. I’ve made such a mess.” Ari tossed the empty cup in the trash. “Maybe you should fear for your life.”
Hudson couldn’t stand seeing her so upset. “Hey, it’s okay. I’ve been getting out coffee stains for years.”
“If I keep this up, you’ll never want to see me again.”
Despite all the mishaps, it was the last thing Hudson wanted, and the knowledge squeezed the air from her lungs. She hardly knew Ari—aside from her being accident prone, ambitious, and beautif
ul. What else was it about Ari that kept drawing her in? Everything inside screamed “run,” but she couldn’t. “Don’t worry. You can’t get rid of me that easily. So when can I see the place?”
“I should have the keys in a few weeks. Maybe sooner.”
Hudson nodded. She could start packing and get some of her things from storage, not that there was much. Most of what she owned was still with Pam.
Ari stood next to her car. “Thanks for meeting me,” she said, then pointed to the drying blotches on Hudson’s shirt. “Let me know if the leopard spots don’t come out.”
“I’m not as concerned about them as you are. Call me when I can see the apartment. Unless you’d rather knock me down to tell me.”
Ari’s head dropped as she studied the ground. She looked mortified.
“I’m joking.” Hudson held her hands. “It was a pleasure seeing you again, and thanks for thinking of me.”
Chapter Seven
Ari tossed her towel on a bench and stepped down the ladder in the deep end. The pool was empty except for a class of four seniors exercising in the shallow end. The water was balmy because the pool was kept at a therapeutic temperature, and she floated along the surface. She closed her eyes, letting the stress ebb away. The smell of chlorine tickled her nose.
She flipped over and swam in her choppy style. It wasn’t long before the women left and she had the pool to herself. She decided to try a more vigorous swim and increase the speed and force of her strokes. She fell into an even rhythm and reached the deep end. A cramp seized her calf muscle. She flailed her arms to keep afloat but went under. The pain was so intense that panic set in. She bobbed to the surface and gasped for air as the searing spasm spun her around. The edge of the pool seemed miles away as she dipped below the surface yet again. I don’t want to die. Not like this. Not now. Her lungs were on fire. She tried to ignore the rock-hard muscle in her leg. She begged for relief. From the pain. The fear.
The water churned and bubbles floated past her face. Arms slid under her shoulders and pulled her upward. She took a gulp of air and coughed hard.
“Just breathe and try to relax. I’ve got you.”
Hudson. Ari held her throbbing calf as Hudson took her to the shallow end. Her savior maneuvered her onto the steps.
“Hold on to the railing and let me take care of your leg.”
Hudson’s strong hands worked the muscles and flexed her foot toward her body, relieving the pressure she hadn’t been able to.
Ari coughed and water spewed from her mouth, but at least she was able to breathe. Relief washed over her. “I thought I was a goner.” Her heart did that trip-hammer thing again as Hudson massaged away the soreness. Her body pulsed with every stroke of Hudson’s fingers, and as her fear left, she imagined being stroked in other places.
How many times was Hudson going to save her? She hated being vulnerable, even more so in front of someone she didn’t know well. Vulnerability led to being open to all sorts of other emotions, and she had no intention of letting her body rule her head. Just thinking about giving in and letting go of control made her stomach churn.
“You look pale. Take some slow breaths.”
Hudson’s concern touched her deeper than the ministrations to her leg ever could. What could she say? I never wanted you to see a weakness in me? I keep telling myself not to feel. That I don’t have time for a “someone” in my life? That no matter what I do to avoid it, I find a way to be around you? Yes, to all of those, but not to anything I will ever tell you. Ari pushed down every iota of attraction and made her voice stronger than she felt.
“I’m good. I’m not used to being rescued.”
Hudson gently set her leg down. “I’m glad I was here.” Hudson looked around at the deserted area. “I wish I’d gotten here sooner.” She pointed to the video camera in the corner near the ceiling. “When I came out of the staff restroom, I saw you go under and knew you were in trouble.” Disappointment marred her otherwise handsome face.
Ari knew she should say or do something to show her gratitude, but the only thought crowding her mind was the knowledge that Hudson was becoming a fatal attraction. An attraction that would lead to the death of her independence.
“Yes, well, you got here,” she said brusquely before forcing a smile that felt as phony as she was sure it looked. She didn’t miss the hurt in Hudson’s eyes or the way she visibly jerked from the comment. She wished she could take it back. She wished she’d never given Hudson the opportunity to rescue her. But what she really wanted to do was throw her arms around Hudson and kiss her until neither of them could breathe. It was too late for a lame apology. She needed to gather what little self-respect she had left and get out of there.
“The truth is I hate seeming helpless. I thought I was going to die.”
“That’s why there are lifeguards. It happens.” Hudson didn’t look at her and kept talking in a matter-of-fact way. “It’s my job. And it wasn’t your fault. Everybody gets cramps. You’re not weak.” Hudson’s gaze finally met hers. “Ari.”
There it was again. The way Hudson said her name. “Thank you.” The words came out in a whisper. She was lost. Ari loved those eyes. Along with the way Hudson touched her leg, the strength of her fingers. The depth of emotion Ari heard in her voice. If only I could—No! Not with Hudson. Hudson made her feel, and feelings were dangerous. They brought disappointment, and she had no time to nurse wounds. It was one reason she’d never let her father see how much his words affected her. She’d schooled herself to not react. And now she had other priorities. She was better off not even thinking of getting involved. Even as one part of her brain said she was being unreasonable, she couldn’t fight the things she’d dreaded her entire life. Time to get back to focusing on the business. Ari walked gingerly up the steps.
Hudson stayed in the water and stared at her with questioning eyes. “Can I help you back to the locker room?”
“You’ve done enough. I can make it on my own.” Ari ignored the reason she’d come to the pool in the first place. She mustered enough strength to face her. “If you’re still interested, I should have the keys next week.”
“All right.” The pain still showing on Hudson’s face and the questioning eyes were more than Ari could stand.
“I’ll call you.” Ari gathered what was left of her dignity, held her head up, and limped away.
* * *
Hudson stormed into the staff locker room and slammed her towel into the laundry basket. What is it with that woman? She turns on and off like a damn light switch. First, Ari gave the impression of being attracted to her, and then Ari was giving her the cold shoulder. As if she couldn’t be bothered with Hudson at all. Maybe she should rethink renting from her. The precarious situation might turn into a total disaster. Worse than the Titanic. This ship was sinking long before it even sailed. Maybe she’d thought about getting on board at one point, but the idea was turning cold. There was always the possibility Ari was unstable, although she didn’t think so. It was more plausible Ari was fickle and playing with Hudson’s gullible side. A side she should have known better than to expose, and one she’d much rather avoid if at all possible. Maybe when Ari called, she’d tell her she changed her mind. And maybe, just maybe, she’d tell her to go fuck herself.
She didn’t need mixed signals and confusing messages.
Nevertheless, the idea of cutting ties with Ari felt like a vise on her windpipe. She’d been naïve in thinking they could be friends. She knew her anger stemmed from being given the cold shoulder. Self-preservation had kicked in. She wasn’t going to be at the mercy of another woman’s whims. She’d learned her lesson. It was time she spoke up. She’d tell Ari she was no longer interested in renting from her and be done with it. Tomorrow she would hit the papers again. She had to take control of her life and needed to get on with it.
* * *
“Congratulations. It’s official. You’re a homeowner.” Sally handed her a set of keys and slid a folder of paperwork
across the table.
Ari looked at the key ring in disbelief. It had been one month since she’d first walked through the door on Huntington Drive. The next time she did it would be her home.
“I can’t believe it’s mine.”
“Believe it, Ari. Now you can make it yours. I’ll bet you can’t wait.” Sally closed her briefcase and stood, signaling her part in the deal was over.
“There’s a lot I need to figure out.” She bit her lower lip. The inspection had gone well, and except for a few minor repairs, the house was in good shape. She didn’t know anyone who could do the patching, painting, and decorating. She’d have to hire someone. Tomorrow is another day. I’ll think about it tomorrow. She needed to call Kara.
“Woot, woot! So tell me, do you feel any different?”
“What I feel is scared to death. For the next couple of months, I’ll have a mortgage on top of rent, not to mention everything else,” Ari said. She fought back the tears. Scared didn’t begin to describe how she felt.
“Aww, don’t worry. I’m sure Hudson will say yes, and even if she isn’t handy, that’s one less thing you’ll have to think about. You said she was anxious to move, right?”
Little did Kara know it was no longer that simple. “Uh…well,” she began.
“What happened?”
Her voice wavered as she told Kara about the scene at the pool and how horribly she’d reacted when her body wanted to give in to Hudson’s touch. She held her head in her hand, wishing she could take back everything she’d said that day.
“Okay, don’t cry.”
“Kara, I might have ruined any chance of having a great tenant. I know she was hurt by the things I said. I could see it. I couldn’t help myself.”
“What couldn’t you help, honey?” Kara asked.
She blew out a frustrated breath. “When she was rubbing my leg, I liked it. A lot. She’s hot. With bedroom eyes and a perfect mouth. Then my body reacted to how great her hands felt and I started to fantasize about having her touch me.”
