“No, I do not,” Bonnie said quickly.
“Never know the answer if you don’t ask.” Vivien waved as she left the house. In a couple of minutes, Bonnie heard the front door slam and then she let out a loud whoosh of breath that she didn’t even realize she’d been holding.
“I’m sorry.” Bonnie looked straight at Rusty. “I owe you a big thank-you and an apology.”
“You are welcome, but you don’t have to be sorry.” He stood up and carried empty plates to the sink. “I’m going to the barn to change the tire on the tractor you use. You ladies probably have a lot to talk about.” His eyes twinkled. “Hey, I’m special. Now I’ve met both your parents.”
“That’s not saying a lot, now is it?” she told him.
Rusty shot her a grin and strode out the door with a wave.
“Had your mom been drinkin’?” Abby Joy asked. “Her eyes were bloodshot.”
“She drove all night from Kentucky and is damn lucky she didn’t get stopped for drunk driving and drugs, but that’s my mama. I have to love her, but nothing says I have to like her all the time,” she said. “I’d forgotten how crazy she can be. Do y’all ever wonder what it was in Ezra that made our mothers marry him? From what we saw of that old man in the casket, I can’t see why any woman would want to vow to love him forever.”
“I’ve wondered the same thing about my mother,” Abby Joy said. “Since we never knew him, we’ll never know the answer to that question.”
“Do you think she’ll get all the way to the West Coast in that truck?” Shiloh asked.
“If she doesn’t there’s lots of biker bars and truck stops between here and there. She’ll find a way.” Bonnie crossed her arms on the table and laid her head down. “Someday I’m going to get a message that says she’s been killed unless she cleans up her act. God, I’m scared to death of…” She didn’t finish.
“That wouldn’t be your fault,” Abby Joy said.
Shiloh patted her on the shoulder. “She’s living a daredevil life and it has consequences.”
“Not her, I’m scared to ever have children,” Bonnie said. “She told Rusty that I didn’t have anything to draw on, and she’s right. Look at my parents—Ezra and Vivien. At least y’all had good mothers to balance out what Ezra donated to the gene pool.”
“Maybe, you take a lesson from them on how not to be,” Shiloh offered. “Are you trying to tell me something?”
“If I’m pregnant, it’ll be the new baby Jesus. I haven’t had sex since I got here,” Bonnie said bluntly. “I’m just saying that any man in his right mind would never want a relationship with me if they truly understood my background.”
“Don’t be thinkin’ that,” Shiloh said. “I’ve seen the love you shower on a baby calf, or even the dogs. You’ll be a great mother.”
“Amen.” Abby Joy added her two cents. “And besides, we’ve all got each other to help us learn the ropes on parenthood. I, for one, am glad that you didn’t let your mother talk you into leaving us. We’ve proved that we belong together right here in this canyon.”
“Yep,” Shiloh said.
“Thank you both.” Bonnie raised her head and wiped away the tears flowing down her cheeks. “Right now, I can’t imagine living anywhere else.”
“Well, that’s settled,” Abby Joy declared. “So now let’s get on with some grocery shopping and talking about these sparks I keep feeling between you and Rusty.”
“Good Lord!” Bonnie said. “One thing at a time. I need to process all this before I move on to my feelings for Rusty.”
“At least you admit and recognize that the feelings are there, so that’s a start.” Abby Joy reached for the last piece of toast.
“And that’s a big step for me,” Bonnie admitted.
Chapter Nine
Bonnie had a lot of time to think as she drove a tractor around the field that afternoon. Rusty was just over the barbed wire fence on the next twenty acres cutting hay, just like she was doing—like they’d both done the day before. The difference was that they weren’t fighting now, and every so often, they were even close enough to wave at each other.
In between those times, she replayed the morning over and over again in her mind. It was so surreal that she could almost believe it had never happened—that it was just a bad nightmare. Of all the crazy stunts Vivien had ever pulled, this one was the most insane. Bonnie slapped the steering wheel with both hands when she realized that her mother was the very reason Rusty might want to be with her?
“It better not be because you felt sorry for me. I don’t want your pity,” she muttered.
Her phone rang and she picked it up from the passenger seat. When her mother’s name came up, she answered immediately. “Did you change your mind? Where are you? I’ll come get you.”
“Hell, no, I ain’t changed my mind,” Vivien said. “I’m on my way to California. I’m not about to change my mind. I’m stopped at a roadside rest outside of Clovis to catch a catnap in the bed of the truck. I brought along a sleeping bag, and I’m dog-tired. I’m calling to ask you one more time to come with me.”
“Answer is still no. I’m happy right here where I am, Mama, but I’ll drive to Clovis and get you if you’ll change your mind. You can work with us here on the place or get a job in Claude or somewhere close and just live here if you don’t want to do ranch work,” Bonnie told her.
“No, thanks. I washed my hands of that place when you was born,” Vivien said. “Rusty seems like a good guy, but Ezra trained him, so keep that in mind. Make him sign a prenup before you marry him so he don’t steal half the place from you. Even good men ain’t to be trusted. You be real careful. There ain’t no such thing as an honest man.”
Bonnie sucked in a long breath to say something else, but then she realized that her mother had hung up on her. She slapped the steering wheel again, stopped the engine, and got out of the tractor. Tears ran down her cheeks—Lord have mercy! She’d cried more in the past few days than she had in her whole life put together. She shook her fist at the sky. Just when she thought she had left the past behind her, its ugly old head had popped right up again, coming at her this time as doubts and fears. Cooper and Waylon were good, honest men for sure, and so was Rusty. Her mother was wrong—she just flat out had to be.
She caught a movement in her peripheral vision but didn’t realize it was Rusty until he and all three dogs surrounded her. He took her in his arms and eased the two of them down on the ground. “What’s the matter? Is it Shiloh or Abby Joy?”
“It’s Mama.” She sobbed into his chest.
“Is she hurt? Did she change her mind?” He rattled off questions too fast for her to comprehend, much less answer.
Even after meeting her and after knowing now exactly what kind of mother Bonnie had, he was still concerned for the woman. For some strange reason, that was the final little bit of what it took to convince Bonnie that she was right where she belonged and gave her the courage to admit her feelings.
“Mama is fine. She just wanted to give me one more chance to go with her.” Bonnie dried her eyes with the back of her hand.
Rusty laid his hands on her shoulders and looked deeply into her eyes. “Please don’t go.”
“I couldn’t if I wanted to, which I don’t,” she whispered without blinking. “It would be too painful to leave this ranch, my sisters, and most of all, you. I love you, Rusty,” she admitted. “It’s too soon to say it, but there it is. I figured it out a few days ago, and I’m tired of fighting the feeling. I don’t want to go another day, or even another hour, without saying the words. I think I fell in love with you right there on that first day, but …”
He put his fingers over her lips. “There are no buts in real love, only ands. I love you, Bonnie, and I don’t give a damn who your parents were. We don’t have to be the by-products of our parents, darlin’. I’m a foster child, and I don’t even remember my folks. We can build our own life right here in this place. We can take steps forward and never loo
k over our shoulder at the past. And, honey, I believe I felt the same about you from the beginning, but I didn’t want you to think it was just to get this place.”
“Okay.” She managed a weak smile through the tears. “I love you, and I’m never letting my mother or anyone else make me doubt myself again.”
Rusty pulled her close to his chest. “What are we going to do about this?”
“Live together on this place for six months and figure it out a day at a time?” she suggested.
“That sounds good to me.” He tipped up her chin for a long kiss that left her breathless.
“Maybe you could even move your things back into the ranch house?” She might be moving too fast, but she didn’t want to waste time she could be spending with Rusty.
Vivien wedged her way between them and licked Bonnie’s hand. “Somehow I feel like this dog loves me more than my mother does. Do you realize you’re the first person who’s ever said those three words to me, Rusty?” Tears began to stream down her cheeks, again.
He brushed a sweet kiss across her forehead. “I believe you’re the first who ever said them to me too. And, I promise to tell you every day that I love you. Now, tell me what caused these tears.” He pulled a red bandanna from his pocket and dried her cheeks.
“I’ve had to be tough my whole life, and I don’t like to cry because it’s a sign of weakness, but I’m so happy that I figured out where I belong. These are happy tears, Rusty.”
He tucked the bandanna back into his hip pocket and slipped an arm under her shoulders. “I’d never be so stupid as to think that you were weak.”
“Thank you,” she whispered. “I meant it when I said I love you, but”—she stopped and shook her head—“it goes deeper than that. I can’t explain it.”
“It’s more like a soul mate kind of thing then, right?” he asked.
“That’s right, and I like the feeling.” She finally smiled.
“So do I, darlin’.” He kissed her one more time.
Chapter Ten
Six months later
Bonnie awoke to find Rusty propped up on an elbow staring at her. She smiled and reached up to run a hand over his unshaven face. “Happy wedding day. Are we ready for this?”
“I hope so.” He grinned. “There’s a lot of people that’s goin’ to be mad as hell if we ain’t at the church this afternoon at about two o’clock. They’re going to have to wade through more than a foot of snow just to get to their trucks, but Cooper and Waylon said they’d take care of clearing the porch of the church and sidewalk.”
“It’s supposed to be bad luck for the bride and groom to see each other on their wedding day.” He toyed with a strand of her hair. “Do you think maybe we should have just gone to the courthouse?”
“Nope. I’ve always wanted a wedding,” Bonnie assured him. “I want to see the look in your eyes when I walk down the aisle, and I want to hold that memory in my heart forever.”
“There’s no way you could be more beautiful than you are right now.” He pulled her lips to his for the first morning kiss. “Think your mother will show up and surprise you?”
“It would be a big surprise all right.” Bonnie threw back the covers and got out of bed. “She’s still runnin’ with that motorcycle gang, and they’ve joined up with more bikers somewhere up near the Canadian border in Washington. She called yesterday and tried to talk me into gettin’ on a plane and coming out there to live with them.”
Rusty got out of bed and picked up a pair of jeans. Bonnie stopped what she was doing and stared at his fine naked body—all hardened muscles, a broad chest, and a heart inside that was so full of love for her that sometimes she still found it hard to believe. In only a few hours, she’d have a piece of paper that said he belonged to her. She full well intended to frame it and set it up on the mantel above the fireplace in the living room for the whole world to see.
“I’m a lucky woman,” she whispered.
“What was that?” Rusty asked.
“I said I’m one lucky woman,” she repeated.
“Not as lucky as I am.” He grinned and rounded the end of the bed to take her in his arms. “I’d like to go back to bed with you, but we’re kind of on a tight schedule here. We’ve got brunch at Shiloh’s, and then we’re supposed to go straight to the church.”
“And Abby Joy says once I step foot in the church, I can’t see you anymore until the wedding.” She tugged on her jeans and stomped her feet down into her boots. “Let’s go get the feeding chores done and then head over to Shiloh’s.”
“Lovers forever.” She held up a pinky.
“Married couple from today until death parts us.” He wrapped his pinky around hers.
“Ranchers together.” They both said it at the same time and held up three fingers.
* * *
Rusty looked out over the congregation that Wednesday afternoon and thought again that New Year’s Day was a strange day for a wedding, but there was no way he was going to argue with Bonnie. She wanted the ceremony to be on the very day when she took ownership of the ranch. After her mother had come for that crazy visit, they’d signed papers back in the summer, and those papers said that on the day they married, the Malloy Ranch would belong to the two of them—and that on that very day, the name of the place would be changed to Sunrise Ranch.
The pianist began to play “The Rose,” and Shiloh came down the center aisle with her arm looped in Waylon’s. Abby Joy and Cooper followed behind them. In less than an hour, Rusty would have two sisters-in-law and two brothers-in-law—he’d have family for the first time in his life. The preacher raised his arms for everyone to stand, and the pianist began to play the traditional wedding march. The double doors at the back of the church opened, and Bonnie came down the aisle alone. Jackson Bailey had offered to escort her, but she had refused. She told Rusty that she was giving herself to him in marriage, and she didn’t need anyone else to do that for her.
She was wearing a lovely white lace dress that stopped at her ankles. Peeking out from under its hem were the same biker boots that she’d worn a year ago on that very first day that Rusty had laid eyes on her. The day that I fell in love with her if I’m being honest about the whole thing, he thought. His eyes met hers, and he couldn’t wait for her to reach the front of the church. He met her halfway back down the aisle and hugged her tightly to his chest.
“I’m the luckiest man alive this day,” he whispered.
“I’d say we’ve made our own luck,” she said. “Now let’s go get married so we can tell the whole world about this baby we’re going to have in four months.”
He tucked her free hand into his, and together, they stepped up in front of the preacher. She handed her bouquet to Shiloh and turned to face Rusty, just like they’d rehearsed, but the night before, she hadn’t looked so much like an angel straight from the courts of heaven. Suddenly, he was tongue-tied and was glad that he’d written his vows on a piece of paper.
* * *
The party for just the wedding party after the reception was held at the newly named Sunrise Ranch. While the ladies were in the bedroom helping Bonnie get out of her fancy lace dress and into a pair of jeans, Rusty slipped away and walked down to the cemetery. The wind whistled through the bare tree branches and blew powdery snow up from the ground, which chilled the bare skin on his face. He pulled the collar of his fleece-lined jacket up to keep his ears warm and bent his head against the cold.
The gate into the cemetery squeaked loudly as if it were competing with the noise of tree limbs rattling against each other. He wasn’t aware that the dogs had followed him until he had brushed away the snow and sat down on the bench in front of Ezra’s tombstone, and the three of them gathered around him.
“My faithful old friends.” He took time to pat each of them on the head with a gloved hand. “We’ve come together to tell him goodbye, haven’t we?”
He sat there for a full minute before he began to talk to the tombstone, which was half covered by
a drift of snow. “I’m here again, Ezra. It was a year ago today that we put you in the ground, and I doubt that you would believe how much things have changed. Why you did what you did is still a mystery to me, but I have to admit, there’s three cowboys in this part of the canyon now who are mighty glad that you did it for whatever reason. When Abby Joy got married and left the ranch, the other two sisters came right here and talked to you. When Shiloh did the same, Bonnie came to talk to you. I figure now that everything is settled, it’s my turn.”
He patted the bench, and all three dogs jumped up on it with him.
“They never knew I saw them make their journey here, and I’ll never know what they said to you, but I don’t imagine any one of them was telling you that she loved you. I may never come back here again except when it’s time to mow and keep the cemetery cleaned up. I owe you that much. But this will be our last conversation. Abby Joy has a beautiful little son, and Shiloh will be having a boy in a few months, so you see if you’d kept either of them around, you would have had a grandson to leave your ranch to, and it would most likely remain the Malloy Ranch. Bonnie and I got married today, and we’re having a daughter. We just found out yesterday that it’s a girl, and we’re so excited about her. I don’t care if we have all girls or if they want to be ranchers when they grow up or not. I can’t imagine some of them not wanting to take over for me and Bonnie when we get old, but that will be their choice. One thing for damned sure, they won’t be sent out into the world to fend for themselves like your daughters were. They’ll be raised right here on Sunrise Ranch. And another thing just as sure, they will be loved.” Rusty ran out of words and sat silent for a time. “I just wanted to tell you that, Ezra, and to thank you for giving me a job, because now I have a family. Goodbye, now, and I don’t know why I should, after the way you treated folks while you were here, but I hope you find peace somewhere along your eternal journey, because you sure brought happiness to a lot of us, whether you intended to or not.”
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