by Auriane Bell
Adrijan was casting a questioning glance at him and he took the opportunity to signal his brother that he was prepared to stop playing at the end of the movement. As agreed, they soon finished, long before the whole duration of the twenty-something minutes of the sonata.
“Did you enjoy it, principessa?” he asked, already knowing the answer.
Mairin looked at him and her face immediately darkened. She was still angry at him, either for losing the bet or because he had teased her about it.
“You aren’t done yet,” the girl grumbled quietly.
Adrijan reached for the violin case. Vivian realised just in time that he had misunderstood , thinking that she had noticed that they hadn’t finished the piece.
“The guitar is over there,” he said, hoping he would take the hint. “It seems that we’re both looking forward to hearing your performance.”
His brother nodded thankfully and after obtaining the instrument sat down on the chair Vivian had prepared for him. It was dead silent until Adrijan nervously cleared his throat and verified that the guitar had been properly tuned. By doing so he had caught everyone’s attention but while their eyes were resting on him, his own gaze was firmly directed towards the ground.
Finally he played the first notes of the ballad he had chosen, raised his head and started to sing with his smooth voice, a voice everyone had already admired seven centuries ago.
Vivian was wondering if he had randomly selected the song, or if it was indeed directed towards him or Mairin. The Japanese lyrics described feelings of love, growing in the same way snow accumulated – slowly and steadily – but also silently. He sang about the cruelty of not being able to confess the feelings that forced him to endure the pain and regret of ever having come to know what love was.
Vivian was amused about the behaviour of both his brother and his bride. It didn’t take a pair of 700 year old eyes or ears to realise that they were in love – and that they weren’t brave enough to admit it to each other.
Adrijan’s performance ended and the immortal exaggeratedly clapped his hands.
“Splendid,” he said, not trying to hide his amusement, “but you should have chosen a different language, frater.” Slowly he got up from the stool. “And now for the reward…”
Mairin hadn’t understood a word and yet it was only with difficulty that she could suppress her tears. Adrijan’s song had moved her deeply. It had consumed her up to a point where she had absolutely forgotten about the bet – until now.
“I’ll gladly attend the music lessons,” she said silently. This was the part of the wager she wasn’t opposed to anymore. On the contrary, the performance she had just experienced had piqued her interest and motivated her to do her best.
The immortal nodded satisfied, again showing a smile on his handsome face.
“As for the kiss… well, it was part of the bet.”
Mairin purposely avoided to look at Adrijan’s face. In her eyes there was only a slim chance that he had come on her request and not the immortal’s order, meaning that he probably didn’t care about the words she had just spoken, and if it was indeed so, she wasn’t keen on seeing his expression. She took a deep breath, telling herself again and again that it was only a kiss without meaning.
“Choose the lucky winner then,” Vivian said.
“Choose…?” Mairin couldn’t believe her ears.
“Well, let’s narrow your choice to one of the gentlemen present.”
“So it doesn’t have to be you?” Mairin mumbled unbelievingly.
Vivian nodded. “Though if you choose Alfred, please ask for permission first.”
The elderly servant was standing close to her and there was no trace of surprise or disgust on his face. For a moment Mairin considered offering him her first kiss. Maybe it would prove to be the lesser of two evils.
“Miss Muriel, would you like a cookie? Sugar helps to stimulate the brain.” The servant carried his tray over to the pillow bed, encouraging her to accept his offer.
“Oy, no cheating old boy!” Vivian laughed. “She might choose you just for those delicious cookies of yours!”
Alfred had positioned himself behind her and Mairin decided to accept his offer. Even if the thought of food alone was enough to make her stomach turn, she was eager to gain some time. Once she had gotten up and was thereby blocking Vivian’s view, Alfred started to whisper to her.
“It would be indeed scandalous if a lowly servant such as I told the future mistress of Mondstein castle that Master Adrijan has inquired after your person every day and insisted that the girl Hilda reported to him daily. You see, it would be utterly unacceptable to share this information with you.”
Mairin stared at him, wondering if her eyebrows were ever going to be able to move back into their normal position. Was everyone here having a surprise ready for her?
The butler didn’t need a reply and continued to speak again, this time without trying to keep the words between them.
“If I might recommend the ones over here, Miss. Chocolate flavour, not too sweet, not too bitter.”
Mairin took one of the suggested cookies. Despite the precarious situation it tasted unexpectedly delicious.
“Have courage, Miss,” Alfred whispered.
Mairin nodded, wiped a few cookie crumbles from her lips and turned away from him.
Adrijan kept thinking that he shouldn’t have come. Mairin and his brother had found another cruel way of playing with his feelings. It hadn’t always been like this but apparently Vivian took pleasure in torturing him since the girl had arrived. Perhaps she had been in on it from the start. Or maybe he was imagining it and he had dared too much with the choice of his song. It could quite possibly be Vivian’s way of telling him that he had gone too far.
Adrijan gazed at the master of Mondstein castle, trying to find a hint of guilt, but there was none. On the contrary, he looked like a little boy who had discovered a hidden box that was filled to its brink with his favourite sweets.
“Quickly, make your choice!” he hurried Mairin in his thoughts. The glimmer of hope that everything wasn’t as it seemed and the strong wish to just run away were difficult to endure. Finally she turned around to face them, first looking at his brother then at him. Vivian was of course the obvious choice. She was his bride and they had come closer over the weeks he had deliberately neglected her.
Adrijan lowered his gaze and listened to her approaching steps. It was enough to know what was going to happen. There was no need for him to watch. Or perhaps there was. Maybe he would realise his place then. He knew the effects of torture all too well. There was hardly anything, persistent pain couldn’t accomplish.
Mairin’s hands on his chest almost made him take a step back in surprise. She was shorter than him and to realise her goal she had to step on her toes. As he looked into her eyes he discovered something he desperately longed for, but at the same time he realised, that it was the same thing he was still afraid of. Slowly the Roman Goddess moved her lips closer to his.
Her heart was beating fast and heavily, as if it were trying to escape her chest by stomping its way through her body. Both of her hands felt cold as ice and were covered by a thin layer of sweat. Mairin was dearly hoping that Adrijan wasn’t disgusted by her touch. It had taken all her courage to come this far and now that she was at this point, time seemed to stand still. Despite her fears she kept pushing herself, constantly renewing the courage Alfred had told her to have. Adrijan had not forgotten about her the past weeks. He had thought about her every single day. He had purposely avoided her, but she wouldn’t let him escape so easily. She hadn’t been alone for so long just to give up now that she had found someone she wanted to be with.
Mairin felt Adrijan’s breath on her face and at this very moment in which she was filled with anticipation she didn’t care whether he was a priest or not, she simply longed for the touch of his lips and leant forward to breech the last bit of space that was still between them.
Adri
jan turned his face to the side and backed away, almost forcing her to lose her balance.
“Why?” she mumbled more to herself than to him. Mairin was in danger of being overcome by anger but when she discovered a single tear rolling down Adrijan’s cheek, the feeling turned into frustration. Before she could decide what to do, Adrijan went past her, heading towards the elevator.
“Don’t,” Vivian had walked over to her and put one of his big hands on her shoulder, holding her back.
“Alfred, tell your master to wait for me in my office. I’ll meet him there once I’m done.”
“Of course, Sir.” The servant put down the tray, bowed and left.
“Once you are done?” Perhaps she was about to regret her choice. “Are you angry?” she asked quietly.
Vivian chuckled. “No, principessa, I’m not angry. Sit. We have to talk.”
Adrijan had spent a while in Vivian’s office before realisation set in. He had ruined it. This time, he had really done it. Restlessly he paced up and down, now and then running his hand through his hair, replaying the scene in his head. How he had craved her kiss until the moment his memories had returned and he had instinctively turned away. Why was everything so messed up? Why was he so messed up? Adrijan wished the pain in his arm would return, on the one hand because he felt the need to punish himself for his own foolishness and on the other hand because every kind of distraction was welcome in a situation like this.
Even if he hoped he was wrong, he couldn’t think of a way to make things right again.
“So I am to believe that you are not angry even though I – your bride – tried to kiss your servant – who, by the way, is a priest – in front of your eyes.”
“Ugh, the way you put it, it really doesn’t sound right.”
Vivian sat down next to her on the pillow.
“You must understand though, that Adrijan is a lot more to me than a servant, and I’m not so sure he’s destined to be a priest. Besides, regardless of the outcome, I could only win. Cookie?”
Mairin shook her head. The immortal shrugged and took one.
“Would you care to explain?” After all that had happened she felt oddly dead.
“I think you have what it takes to make him happy and I do wish for Adrijan’s happiness. Yet if you decided to give up on him and become mine I would be delighted as well. No loss – you see?”
Mairin didn’t see.
“You wouldn’t mind giving me up?”
“Oh that’s a tricky question, especially if asked by a woman.” Vivian laughed. “Of course I’d prefer to have a bride. It’s vital to me, but there is no point in forcing things.” The immortal folded his hands. “Let me rephrase that. It’s impossible to force things.”
“Vital? Won’t you finally tell me my true purpose?”
What was the chance that she would receive an answer to her question this time?
“Everyone, including myself, has told you that I am immortal. Do you believe it?”
Mairin failed to see what relevance this question had but decided to oblige him.
“Well…”
“You should,” he interrupted her. “I am immortal, even if it isn’t impossible for me to die.”
“I knew it!” Mairin regretted her sudden outburst and pursed her lips.
“Listen. I am indeed over 700 years old. I’ve had the chance to make many experiences in my long life but not without a price.”
“Hmm.” Mairin still wasn’t willed to believe him. But what was the proper reaction to insanity?
Vivian smiled knowingly. “Have you ever held a music box in your hands?”
Mairin nodded.
“You wind it up and the tune starts to play, yet it won’t last forever. Towards the end it becomes slower and slower until – after a few single sounds – it stops completely. My life is just like that. Before I can get close to the end I wind up the clock again and thereby avoid getting there. I escape death.”
“How would you do that?”
Vivian reached into his pocket and produced a small, inconspicuous hour glass.
“With this. My first bride left it to me and told me to protect it at all cost.”
“Magdala did?”
“Mhm.”
“How does it work?”
“Well… a music box can’t wind up on its own. Someone else has to do it. I also can’t prolong my life on my own. You see, it doesn’t produce life energy, it simply transfers it.”
Mairin was starting to get one of her dizzy spells.
“You drain the bride’s life?”
“Yes… and no. It doesn’t work like that. I can’t force you to give up your life, nor would I try to if I could. This device only allows someone to give away life, never to take it.”
“So if I agreed to become your wife, I would have to give my life to you?”
“Romantic, isn’t it?” Vivian wasn’t serious but Mairin found it hard to be amused by what he had said.
“Would I have to give up all of it at once?”
“No. Only if something severe happened, like a sickness that required a lot of energy. I’ve never limited my resources to a single person either. Almost every maid living here has given me a up to a few years of her precious life. It helps to prolong the bride’s existence.”
“How… comforting,” Mairin mumbled.
“Yet it would be your only worry. Believe me, if you agree to it I will take good care of you.”
Of course he would take care of his investment. Mairin nervously gazed at the statues closest to her.
“Did many of them die young?”
“When you give up life energy your body ages. Spoken in terms of years though – no, most of them had a long life.”
“I see.” Mairin had difficulties believing the abstruse story. “Could you demonstrate to me how it works?”
Vivian frowned.
“I’m sorry, principessa, but I don’t intend to play with life just to prove to you that I’m not lying.”
Mairin felt uncomfortable about his reaction and moved to get up from the bed.
“I’m not done yet. There is more.”
“More?”
“Like I mentioned before, the device doesn’t work if you aren’t willing to give up your life force. That is why a strong bond is required. Even if you decided not to come close to me anymore after the wedding night, you would have to sleep with me at least once.”
Mairin frowned.
“That’s ridiculous. I could simply promise to follow your rules.”
“How can I trust that you will give up your life to save mine if you aren’t even willing to fulfil my request?”
“This and that are-“
“It’s part of the contract.”
Mairin fell silent. If the whole story was made up then he had put some thought into it.
“Are you certain you’re over 700 years old?”
Vivian sighed. “Wouldn’t it explain a few things?”
The way he was knowledgeable about a vast amount of subjects and the fact that he seemed to be skilled at everything he did supported the theory.
“I guess it would,” she replied hesitantly.
“I don’t expect an answer from you right away, but I’m planning to take a trip to Traumstadt with you and would ask you to act as my bride for the time being. Due to the recent conflicts in the area I believe it is necessary to demonstrate presence.”
“I will try.”
“Well then. Enough about me. You are probably more concerned about Adrijan’s reaction anyway.”
Mairin felt found out. As important as it was, at the moment it was difficult for her to focus on a future that seemed distant and unreal to her. Hadn’t she promised herself that she would have courage and try her best to get closer to Adrijan?
“He didn’t want it,” she mumbled.
“I don’t agree.”
“Hm?”
“Have you considered his feelings properly? Do you even know the person
you believe to be in love with?”
Mairin blushed. The immortal’s words felt like salt in her wounds.
“Being in love for the first time is a curious thing. You’re not only confronted by your obsession with the person but also with your fascination about that feeling.”
Vivian was staring into space and Mairin wondered if he was remembering experiences he had made with Magdala.
“Love makes you frightfully prone to oversight. But what point is there in loving a mask instead of the various facets of the person behind it?”
The immortal turned to her.
“Won’t you give it another chance and try to find out more about him?“
It felt strange to be encouraged in this matter by her own groom.
“I would like to. Will you tell me about him?”
Vivian shook his head.
“There is no point in learning about his past if he doesn’t tell you on his own. Tomorrow he will travel to Traumstadt to prepare our visit. Time is scarce, but perhaps you will find an opportunity to talk to him before he leaves.”
Mairin was confused and unable to cope with everything she had learnt today. How would she even be able to face Adrijan again?
“Let’s head back. Or did you want to stay here on your own a bit longer?”
It was going to get dark soon and the thought of remaining in the winter garden with the statues all by herself scared her enough to quickly get up from the pillow bed.
