Lust

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Lust Page 27

by Melissa Andrea


  “Am I late?” she asked, breathless. Her face was flushed, and her chest moved as if she’d run here. “I’m so sorry,” she rushed on. “Alex is still adjusting, or should I say we all are, and I completely lost track of time.”

  “You’re right on time.” Meela pulled her into a death grip, and Carrie’s eyes found mine, curiously. “I still hate pulling you away from him so soon.”

  “Nonsense. Dillon has everything under control.”

  I knew it was ridiculous to be jealous of Carrie’s ability to calm Meela’s nerves, but that didn’t change the fact that it bugged the hell out of me.

  “David should be here any minute, and then we can start,” I told them.

  And he was. When he arrived, I introduced him officially to Meela and then to Carrie, and shortly after, we were escorted into Judge Miliks’s quarters. Judge Miliks and I went back a few years, helping me when I was just starting out as a lawyer. He went through the whole proceedings, lettings us know how things would go before starting.

  “Why don’t you stand in front of Reed, Meela, and then we can start,” the judge told her, and she moved to stand in front of me.

  Her eyes bounced around everywhere before she had no choice but to look at me. I held her stare while Miliks began, giving her no option to look away. As the judge went on, everyone else seemed to fade away until it was only Meela and me in the room.

  L U S T

  Later, after Carrie, Dillon, the baby, and Meela’s mom and sister left, even after Meela had tried to get her family to stay the night, we sat in silence on the couch. Meela had been quiet and closed up since leaving the courthouse, and despite the past few weeks we’d spent together, she seemed completely different now.

  “I’m so ready for bed,” Meela said around a yawn.

  “You read my mind. Let’s go, and I’ll clean up tomorrow.”

  I knew her intention was to let me know we would not be treating tonight like we had all the other nights, but I intended to let her know she was wrong.

  “You go,” she told me. “I’m going to take a shower first.”

  “A shower sounds perfect. I’ll join you, and then we’ll go to bed together.”

  “Reed,” she warned and then pushed herself to the edge of the couch.

  “You’re not going to pull away from me, Meela. I won’t let you.”

  “I told you if we did the whole marriage thing, things would be different, Reed.”

  “And now I’m telling you, it’s not. Now, you can fight me on this, and this is me completely endorsing that option, but I’ll win. And you’ll love every minute of my victory.”

  “You can’t do that, Reed,” she shot off and pushed herself off the couch with impressive speed for someone almost eight months pregnant. “You can’t dictate how things are going to be and just expect that I’m going to go all gooey for you because you lay on that sexy charm and release those smoldering green eyes.”

  She was walking to the bedroom when I came up behind her; grasping her arm, I pulled her around and backed her up into the wall. Pinning her wrists above her, I held her there, hovering above her.

  “The fuck I can’t, Meela. I’m not going to let you have this one. It’s mine, and for the time being, you’re mine.” My lips were on hers, and my tongue did little to convince her to open her mouth for me.

  I took her right there on the floor in the hall, again in the shower, and then once more in our bed. Despite what Meela said, or whether she considered this real, she was fucking mine.

  And maybe that made me a selfish son of a bitch, but I wanted that fire all to myself, and I got exactly what I wanted. Meela was mine in every sense of the word; no man could handle the burn of her body the way I could.

  I owned her body, her mind, and the part of her that went off like a firecracker.

  L U S T

  “Reed?”

  “Yes?”

  She was lying with her head on my chest. We’d been lying in bed most of the morning, neither one of us wanting to get up and ruin the little bubble we’d created.

  “What happened with your parents?”

  I tensed, my fingers that had been tracing random patterns over her naked back stopped. The last thing I wanted to do was ruin this moment by telling Meela what happened in my past, but I knew I had to tell her, and I knew I needed to tell her about Nicole before it was too late.

  I took a deep breath, exhaling slowly.

  “I always knew I would be a lawyer. My father was a lawyer, my grandfather too, so it was up to me and my … brother to follow suit.”

  She lifted her head. “You have a brother?”

  “Yep. He was supposed to be a lawyer, but he had other plans.” I tried to figure out where to start. “In the 9th grade, I met Nicole Thomas, and it wasn’t soon after that we started dating. We were high school sweethearts. After I graduated, I had gotten an internship that was going to last my entire summer.”

  I went on, telling her everything that had happened between my parents, Nicole, and my brother and the whole time she listened, not saying a word. When I finished, we stared at each other, and a tear slipped down her cheek.

  “I’m so sorry, Reed. I can only imagine how devastated you were.”

  “I was, at the time. I don’t think I could ever forgive any of them, but I know I should for my own sanity.”

  “I definitely think you should for your sanity, Reed. It’s horrible what they did, but you can’t let it continue to eat away at you.”

  We stared at each other. I rubbed my thumb over the fullness of her bottom lip and watched her eyes dilate with lust.

  “Your turn,” I finally said.

  “For?” Her brows pulled.

  “Your dad. He’s not really dead is he?”

  She look surprised for a brief second and then there was so much sadness it was like a punch to my gut. “No,” she finally admitted.

  Her fingernails clawed softly at my skin, until she finally sighed and continued. “He left when I was young. I haven’t seen or heard from him since so he might as well be dead.”

  “What happened? Why did he leave?”

  “Drugs. He was working a lot, he was a lawyer too, he started taking pills just to help keep him alert, awake. He was able to get his hands on anything he could want or need and he did. He started taking it more and more until there was no stopping him. We tried. My mom tried. She beg and pleaded and then she told him she couldn’t let him destroy our family the way he was destroying himself.”

  She took a much needed breath, and she looked so far away. “He left without saying goodbye to me or Kaylee and for the longest time I thought it was better that way, there was nothing I could have said to change my mine, but now, I wish he had. Maybe then I would have had some kind of closure, and my need to punish the opposite sex with his sins wouldn’t have ruined my love life, or lack of one.”

  It made so much sense now. Meela’s mistrust for me, for what I could possibly make her feel, it terrified her because the fear that I would do what her dad did was very real. Meela, her mom, her sister- none of them deserved the pain one man had caused.

  “I’m not your father, Meela. I’m not going to disappear like he did.”

  I cupped her face, bringing her up to straddle me. Our lips never lost contact as I devoured her mouth, my tongue dipping, tasting every part of her. She untangled the sheet from us, lifting herself up and then lowering herself over my cock. She was so fucking tight and warm. I groaned into her mouth, pumping my hips harder and faster, taking intense pleasure in the way her fingernails bit into my chest.

  I knew I should have told her about Nicole then and there, but I realized I was terrified of what would happen when she found out. I had waited too long and I was in too deep with Meela. If I told her now, it would ruin everything.

  And I wasn’t ready to give her up yet.

  Thirty Four

  Meela

  I looked down at my phone for the hundredth time.

 
; I knew he hadn’t called or text because my phone hadn’t gone off, but that didn’t stop me from looking at it for the hundred and first time. Reed was working on a huge case, and he’d been so busy prepping for court over the past month. Most days, I was lucky if I got to see him before he left in the morning or I went to bed at night.

  His first day in court was today, and he’d been up all night practicing his opening statement. I’d halfway woken up when he’d gotten into bed, aligning his body with mine. His body was cool from his shower, and shampoo and mint filled the room. When his hand slipped under my tank top to caress my belly and then higher up to catch my already hard nipples between his fingers, I was wide awake.

  It was another hour before we both finally drifted to sleep, and when I’d woken up, he was already gone. I hated the hours we were apart; it was harder not working, but I’d managed to keep myself busy with prepping for the baby.

  Things had changed so drastically between Reed and me after we’d left the hospital. Our relationship had taken on a whole new level, and I found myself being free with him in a way I was never able to with anyone else.

  I’d spent so much of my childhood building walls to keep everyone from being able to destroy the broken pieces of my heart. I swore off men, devoting my time to my future, a future I’d become accustomed to living alone.

  I never expected Reed to obliterate not only my walls but also my way of thinking and believing, but he had. And he did it all with one shot, one dare, one night. There was no way I’d ever be able to go back to my way of thinking before, and I didn’t want to. Because of Reed, I didn’t want to.

  My phone went off as I sat in the waiting room of the doctor’s office, and my heart jumped inside my chest as I looked down at the lit screen. As quickly as it spiked, it sank when I saw Carrie’s name instead of Reed’s. I knew court was only half a day today, and I had sent him a text to call me as soon as he could, but that it wasn’t an emergency.

  “Fancy meeting you here.” Her familiar voice broke through, bringing her smiling face into focus.

  She pulled off her coat, putting it and her purse down one chair over, and with impressive grace and ease, she slowly lowered herself onto the chair next to me. Her stomach seemed to be stretched to its limit, and for her comfort, I’d hoped the next few weeks left of her pregnancy would be kind to her.

  “Hey.” I felt like my smile took up my entire face, and I couldn’t help it.

  She eyed me suspiciously. “You look different.”

  I touched my face. “Good different or bad different?”

  Her face changed, catching me off guard, but I had no reason. Something I couldn’t quite read flashed beneath her fair eyelashes. It made me feel uneasy for the first time since meeting her.

  “What’s wrong?” And then it was gone, evaporating into the air like smoke.

  Her smile returned, but it wasn’t the same. “Nothing, and good different. Definitely good different.”

  She seemed completely normal now, making me question what I thought I saw to begin with.

  “Well, I guess that’s good.” I gave her a smile. “I haven’t seen you in a while.”

  “I had to switch my appointment days to Thursdays because of work. Did you switch yours?”

  “No, my doctor had to cancel my regular Tuesday appointment, and today was the soonest she could get me in.”

  “Well, I’m glad. I realized how much waiting sucks when you don’t have someone to talk to.”

  We laughed, but our reactions seemed forced and watered down.

  “So, tell me what’s-” Her face deadpanned before she could finish her sentence.

  Her focused seemed to be zoned in on one particular spot, and when I travelled the length of her stare, I spotted what had caught her attention. My first response was to cover my ring finger, and that was odd.

  For some reason, I couldn’t find anything to say, and I didn’t understand her shock. And then I remembered everything that was going on with her husband, and I felt bad for her.

  “I guess congratulations are in order.” Her eyelids fluttered, and she was looking at me again.

  “Thank you,” I got out. “It happened really fast.”

  “Love is funny like that, right?”

  I smiled, though it felt tight, and nodded. I wasn’t about to tell her how it had more to do with joint insurance than love.

  “Speaking of love ...” She smiled, tucking a piece of stray hair behind her ear.

  The change of subject from me to her was a sudden relief, and the weirdness that had passed between us felt behind us now.

  “Your friend?”

  She nodded, her joy bubbling over. “It’s different with him. We’re really in love.”

  “I’m really happy for you, Nicole.”

  “Thank you. You might get to meet him. He’s supposed to be getting out of work early to pick me up.”

  “I’d like that.”

  “Well, I hope I get to.” I tried to smile, but something made her frown.

  “Are you okay?” she asked me.

  “Just a little crampy today. Nothing serious.” At least, I didn’t think it was anything serious.

  Her face shifted with sympathy. “Braxton Hicks. I know they say they’re not supposed to hurt, but they lied.”

  “Yes, they did,” I agreed, shifting in my chair

  “Mints,” she said randomly. “They used to help me. I think I have some in my purse.” She lifted said purse into her lap and began digging through it.

  I went to tell her she didn’t have to, but my uterus contacted again, and I figured it couldn’t hurt to try.

  “Yep, here,” she announced, pleased and pulled out a round case of mints. Her efforts were a little zealous, and her purse slipped, sending free random items. “Crap,” she breathed, trying to juggle everything in her lap.

  “It’s fine,” I told her and slid to the end of my seat to bend over.

  A tube of lipstick, a dollar bill, a couple of receipts, and a picture. I flipped it around.

  My heart stopped.

  There was no mistaking the hollow, empty silence inside my chest.

  “You have a son, too?” I choked out as I slowly lifted the picture off the floor and brought it closer.

  There was no mistaking what I clearly saw in the picture clasped tightly between my fingers. I knew if I didn’t loosen my grip, I would destroy the fragile material, but I couldn’t for the life of me let go.

  “Yes.” Her voice brought my attention to her face, and I felt like I was looking at a completely different person.

  The affection, the love, for the child and the man in the picture was almost tangible. And it was enough to destroy any foolish ideas I’d had about my future just an hour ago.

  “I never mentioned that before?”

  I shook my head, trying to swallow the lump in my throat.

  “Wow, talk about mother of the year. He’s three now.”

  “Is that …?”

  “That’s my son’s father.” And there was the same overwhelming look of total devotion again. “They’re like two peas in a pod, right?”

  Identical peas in a pod. My thumb moved over the man staring back at me in the picture. My eyes moved back and forth between the two as I compared the same green eyes, the same dark-colored hair, and the same maddening crooked smile.

  Father and son.

  Reed and his son.

  I looked up at Marie, and she was no longer just a nice pregnant woman I’d met five months ago. She was Reed’s wife, the mother of his son, and soon-to-be ...

  “Do you ...?” I swallowed again, wishing I could get rid of the knot clogging my air. “Is he excited about the baby?”

  “My husband? Or my son? They’re both beyond thrilled. Jason, that’s our son, he would have rather had a baby brother, but I promised him having a little sister would be as equally fun.” She laughed and held out her hand for the picture.

  My head snapped in her direction, an
d I felt like I’d been hit with a wrecking ball. “You’re having a girl?”

  “Yep.” She beamed, rubbing her stomach. “I found out about a month ago. The father was out of town that weekend, so he was super upset about missing it, but we did something fun to celebrate.” She went on. “Do you know what you’re having?”

  “A girl,” I said, feeling my mouth form the words, but I couldn’t hear the words past the thundering in my head.

  “Aww, yay! Aren’t you so excited? Is your hubby? Did you want a girl?” She chatted on without giving me a chance to respond to her questions. As if I could anyway. “We really did. Have you guys picked out a name? The father and I keep going back and forth, but he wants to name her Sophie after his grandmother.”

  I lost it.

  I felt like I was on a bad roller coaster, and there was no end to the ride. The room, and everything in it, began to spin, swirling until everything blended together into much of nothing.

  I couldn’t breathe.

  “I’m going to be sick.”

  Lunging out of my chair, I made a mad dash for the door to the doctor’s office. I was well aware that all eyes were on me as I fled, but who the fuck cared. I’d like to see how any one of them handled finding out that the father of their child was not only in a relationship with another woman, but had a son and a daughter with her as well.

  Bursting through the doors to the outside, I scared a few of the people walking by. They looked at me like I’d lost my fucking mind, and they were right. Bracing my arm against the wall of the building, I leaned over, trying to pull in as much oxygen as I could. The baby moved and my stomached tightened, causing me to wrap my arm around it.

  I was vaguely aware of the woman who stopped to see if I was okay. I didn’t even know if I responded, but she walked away without another word.

  I didn’t know what I should do now. I felt like I was standing in the middle of a battlefield with nothing left to protect me from the deadly crossfire of Reed’s lies and second life.

  He was a liar. A phony. He made me think I could trust him. He made me believe I was falling in love with him and that we would build a life together and grow old together. I was stupid and foolish, and I could only blame Reed so much. I should have never let my guard down. I knew who he was after the first time I’d met him, and I still thought I could trust him.

 

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