Matt and Mary Darby, I will always want to be like you.
Phil ‘Six-pack’ McDarby, a gifted human in so many ways, it is shocking. Don’t ever stop making me laugh, even when I beg and weep ‘please’ from a foetal position on the floor.
Galen English, the ridiculously good-looking car battery who also has really good-looking children. You rock.
Marian ‘Angel’ Condron, the universe is infinitely better with you in it, so please drive carefully.
Mick ‘Moonhead’ Minogue, it makes me happy that you exist. I wrote this book to impress you.
Kathryn Kennedy and Frankie Fenton, if it wasn’t for you I never would have met … no, wait, that’s your story not mine. Giant lovehearts to both of you. Don’t call the baby Emily, even if it’s a girl. Along with Lesley McKimm, mad stuff happens when you lot are around. I’ve learned to just go with it.
Paula ‘Amazon’ Cousins, you carried Simon to a place I couldn’t. You would also definitely win at arm wrestling. I will always be grateful.
Some Cove specials: awesome and epic Diamond brothers Sean and Jack, gorgeous Holly Doyle, Anita and Soren Griffin, Maire Giblin, Margie Desmond, Helen Coughlan, Yasmin Fortune, sea glass lady Nancy Falkow McBride, seaweed gentleman Mark Lawlor.
Yvonne Leon and Treasa Gibney, lucky me, I get to call you both friends.
The Happy Pear Cafe, the groovy heart of Greystones.
Roisin Ingle, you put me in the Irish Times in my swimsuit. How did that happen? You are the finest person and writer, with a heart to match.
Sarah ‘Canadian badass’ Williams from the Sophie Hicks Agency, my agent with the best sense of humour, you always just got it.
Clara Farmer from Chatto & Windus, I am so very relieved that you were the one to help me write this book. And Charlotte Humphery, your eloquence made the editing process entirely pain free.
Emma Norton, Jennie Scanlon and Chelsea Morgan Hoffmann from Element Pictures, three amazing women and many adventures ahead.
Alison McKenny, if you lived in Greystones we would totally make you swim.
My long suffering parents, Pat and Dave ‘What did you say about us now?’ O’Neill. Sorry, but it’s all your fault.
Catherine O’Neill, thank God I have a sister who is no one else but you.
My brother Joe O’Neill, the kids and I would lock you up in a box and keep you in our kitchen forever if we could. I don’t care if that sounds creepy.
The other brothers, John, David and Michael O’Neill, board games without you are just not the same.
My dear husband, Simon Fitzmaurice. ‘It’s fucking mental being stuck inside your head Ruth, I got freaked out and had to stop reading’; your compliment made me swoon.
All the sportos, motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies and dickheads who have ever graced our doorstep, I adore you; I think you are all righteous dudes.
Our collective tribe of children: Sofia, Ava and Isobel McDarby; Kai, Tasiana, Levi and Bodhi Griffin English; Jack, Raife, Arden, Sadie and Hunter Fitzmaurice. What a merry band of heart-punching, ass-kicking laughter monsters. I hope you never ever become real life respectable adults. Did I say that out loud?
Thank you all and sorry if I ever made you cry.
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First published in 2017 in the United Kingdom by Chatto & Windus
First published in the United States 2018
Copyright © Ruth O’Neill Fitzmaurice, 2017
This book is a work of nonfiction based on the life, experiences, and recollections of the author. In some limited cases the names of people and details of events have been changed solely to protect the privacy of others.
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ISBN: HB: 978-1-63557-158-5; eBook: 978-1-63557-159-2
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