by Mary Monroe
“How come you so particular about my dolls? Ain’t you got none?” Othella asked.
Ruby, with her eyes on the largest doll in the room, turned to Othella and gave her a pensive look. “My mama stopped buyin’ me dolls when I turned twelve. She said I was too old.”
“Well, don’t you still have the ones she did buy you when you was a kid?”
“Huh? Oh, my sisters’ crazy kids done either took all the ones I had, or broke off their arms and legs. I just love baby dolls, girl dolls especially. I’m goin’ to have all girl babies when I get married. Seven. Just like my mama and her mama.”
“Well, when you have you some girl babies, you can do whatever you want with them. But I don’t like nobody messin’ with my dolls. You can come here all you want, but don’t tetch my dolls. I want them to all still be in good shape when I leave home to get married so my little sisters can have them to play with.”
Ruby was surprised and disappointed to find out that Othella was so territorial about her things. Now she was having second thoughts about cultivating a relationship with her. But she cancelled that thought as soon as Othella’s cute brother Ike ducked into the room and offered Ruby some peanut brittle that he had just made.
Twenty minutes later, Ruby told Ike she was ready to leave and wanted to know if he was still going to treat her to some vanilla ice cream.
CHAPTER 4
ONE OF THE MANY REASONS THAT RUBY’S PARENTS DIDN’T want her to socialize with Simone’s kids was because Simone didn’t properly supervise them. Ike was only thirteen, but he stayed out all night if he wanted to. So did fourteen-year-old Othella and her twin brother O’Henry. Twelve-year-old Roger often disappeared for days at a time and usually came home drunk. The other kids were younger, and they came and went as they pleased as well.
Othella’s two youngest sisters, Yula and Noreen, were only seven and eight. Her other sister, Irene, was eleven. Even though Irene was shy and somewhat slow, she was having sex on a regular basis with a fifteen-year-old boy who had already impregnated one girl. Othella had been sexually active since she was twelve. She and her siblings had access to alcohol and sometimes they got tipsy right in front of Simone. She was usually too intoxicated or too busy doing her own thing to know, or care, what her kids were up to. They had the run of the house, seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day.
When school was in session, the Cartier children attended at their leisure. A thorough education was a dream, therefore not a priority. A lot of black or biracial kids like Simone’s, some as young as nine, had already dropped out of school to work in the fields. Sadly, the few who had managed to graduate from high school and attend college found out the hard way that an education didn’t really mean much when you were a person of color. They generally took whatever jobs they could get.
One of Ruby’s sisters had married an ambitious man who had completed four years of college. He had interviewed for several jobs, and ended up stamping prices on merchandise in a feed store. No one else had offered him any other position. And then there was her father’s baby brother, Lewis. He’d completed a two-year course at a culinary school and served in the army. The only job that he’d been offered was a janitor’s position at the corner supermarket. To supplement the income that he needed to support himself and a wife and nine children, he baked pies for the same restaurant that Ruby’s mother baked pies for. Lewis had been sleeping with Simone for the past ten years, listening to her make fun of him for working for a “pie wagon,” which was how she referred to that uppity “whites only” restaurant.
When Othella shared that piece of information with Ruby—the fact that her uncle was paying Simone to sleep with him—Ruby cringed. “If my daddy ever finds out about that, there is no tellin’ what he’ll do.”
As off limits as Othella and her siblings were, Ruby didn’t care. As a matter of fact, she enjoyed the excitement and the risks involved in doing something that her parents didn’t want her to do. She was having fun, and to Ruby, that was what life was really all about. Especially now that she’d ducked into the bushes with Ike.
The tryst had happened that Saturday afternoon in July on the way to the Spoon family’s ice cream parlor, the day before Othella’s birthday party. It was over too quick for Ruby. Ike leaped up off her so fast, she thought that maybe a bug or a lizard had bitten him on his butt or something worse.
“What’s wrong?” she wanted to know, massaging the insides of her thighs. “Is it over?”
“It is for me,” Ike quipped, still huffing and puffing.
Ruby was already puzzled, but she grew even more puzzled when he handed her a large leaf that he’d plucked from a bush. “What’s this for?”
“Wipe that blood off your thighs, and get your butt home before somebody catches us.”
“But ain’t we goin’ to finish doin’ it?”
Ike snickered. “Girl, we done finished doin’ it.”
“But it was feelin’ so good. I thought,” Ruby stopped talking when she saw the mean look on Ike’s face.
“Look, Ruby Jean. I like you and all, and I just enjoyed myself. If you want us to stay friends, you won’t badger me like you doin’ now. We straight on that?”
Ruby nodded. “This mean you my man?”
“I guess,” he said, shrugging and zipping up his pants. “As long as you don’t tell nobody.”
Ruby remained on the ground, lying on her side with her thighs pressed tightly together. She dropped the leaf, watched it flutter to the ground, and then she asked, “I can’t tell Othella?”
“Especially not Othella! Her mouth is like a dipper, always open!” Ike hollered, waving his hands in the air.
“Well, what about the next time?” Ruby hadn’t noticed it before, but now there was a stinging sensation in her vagina. To her horror, there was so much blood and semen between her thighs, they stuck together when she attempted to rise. Not to look like a damn fool, she rolled over on her back and sat bolt upright. She looked like a damn fool anyway, struggling to get up on her feet.
Ike placed his hands on his hips as he stared at her. He was amused and impatient.
“The next time what?” he asked, finally grabbing her arm to help her up. As soon as he released her, he hawked some spit into the palms of his hands and slicked back his curly black hair. “I ain’t got no idea what you talkin’ about, girl.” He brushed off his overalls and shirt. Despite his dingy cheap clothes, he was sure enough dapper and sexy, Ruby thought. “Why you lookin’ me up and down like that?”
Ruby shrugged. “I never thought a girl like me would get a boy like you,” she said shyly, her face burning.
“Well, you did. Now I’m goin’ to go play ball with the Porter brothers. They are scared to be around you too much on account of your mean daddy. Even I’m scared to death of that man! So don’t follow me, you hear?”
Ruby was so taken aback, she almost tumbled back to the ground. She took a deep breath and composed herself. For one thing, she couldn’t understand why Ike didn’t share his fear of her mean daddy before and while he was making love to her. “What about that ice cream?”
“Ice cream? What ice cream? I ain’t got no money for no ice cream. What did you do with that leaf I just gave you?” Ike said, looking around. He didn’t wait for Ruby to answer his question. He saw the same leaf on the ground, so he picked it up and handed it back to her. “Wipe yourself off and get on home. I’ll see you at the party tomorrow tonight.”
Ruby snatched the leaf and began to swipe herself between her thighs. She was greatly disappointed, stunned that her first sexual encounter with a boy had not been more romantic. Ike must have sensed her feelings and thoughts, because he hauled off and kissed her on the lips, harder and longer than he’d ever kissed a girl.
“Next time you won’t have to use no leaf to wipe yourself off with. I’ll bring a rag or some newspaper, hear?” he said. “By the way, if you do make it to the party tomorrow night, maybe we can do it again then.” That made Ruby
smile. She didn’t care what she had to do, she’d be at Othella’s birthday party.
“Bye!” Ike yelled before he took off running.
Ruby stood in the same place like a telephone pole for several minutes after Ike had departed, smiling and looking at the spot on the ground where she had lost her virginity.
The next night around nine, after her parents had gone to bed, Ruby jumped out of her bedroom window and trotted all the way to Simone’s house. She wore her tightest, most revealing blouse and a pair of denim pants designed especially for big boned girls, loose in the legs and elastic in the waist. She had applied some lipstick, rouge, and nut brown face powder that she had secretly purchased the last time she went shopping. She kept her makeup and “party” clothes hidden in a box under her bed.
She had not mentioned Othella’s party to her parents because as far as they knew, she had nothing to do with Othella. And Ruby wanted them to keep thinking that way, not just so she could maintain a relationship with Othella, but now because of Ike.
As soon as she arrived at the party, which was already in full swing, she spotted at least two-dozen kids from the neighborhood. They all looked surprised to see her, because they knew how strict her parents were. But none of them had any plans to tattle on Ruby. They all knew about that switchblade she carried in her bobby sock. Even though she had never used it, nobody wanted to find out if she would.
Every single one of Othella’s guests greeted Ruby with a warm smile. Five minutes after she had walked in the door, Ike pulled her into the room he shared with his two brothers so he could play with her titties. But after that, he practically ignored her.
It was the first time that a lover disappointed her. But something told her to get used to it, because it would not be the last time.
CHAPTER 5
IKE PRACTICALLY IGNORED RUBY. HE WAS TOO BUSY DANCING up a storm with that high yellow wench, Willene Starkey.
Ruby was glad that she got sick with a slight toothache and had to leave Othella’s party early. She didn’t even say good-bye to Ike.
“You want me to go with you so I can help you climb back into your bedroom window?” Othella asked as she walked Ruby to the door, glad that she had agreed to come so everybody could see that she could attract some “decent” friends, too.
“That’s all right,” Ruby told her, rolling her eyes at Ike. “If I am goin’ to be jumpin’ in and out of my bedroom window to come see you now, I need to get used to it.” Even though Ruby was disappointed in Ike, she managed to smile and tell Othella, “I really had a lot of fun.”
“Well, I hope you don’t get no toothache the next time. You’ll have even more fun, Ruby Jean.”
Ruby didn’t spend much time thinking about how Ike ignored her. There were plenty of other boys in the neighborhood who were glad to accommodate her. A few weeks after she’d given her virginity to Ike, she had sex with three more boys. Neither one was as cute as Ike, but they had all made her feel just as good as Ike. One boy had made her feel even better.
School started a few days later. Ruby was horrified when she discovered that one of her teachers was the kind of sad-sack old maid who had nothing better to do than give students tons of homework on the first day of school. She rushed home that day, rushed through dinner, and then she rushed to her room to do her homework and Othella’s. She was determined to make this friendship work and doing Othella’s homework was a small price to pay. Besides, she still wanted an excuse to visit Othella’s house in case Ike came to his senses.
Ruby and Othella discussed a lot of things when they were together, but the one subject they talked about the most was sex.
“I can go all night with Steve Wes. He’s so cuddly and gentle, and he smells good all the time, like soap. I wouldn’t mind marryin’ him and havin’ his babies,” Othella swooned.
She and Ruby occupied the steps to the back porch at Othella’s house that September night, a few days after school had started. It was a warm night with the crickets, owls, and other night creatures out in full force. Leaves of various sizes and colors covered the ground like a quilt. Despite the mosquitoes, which were so aggressive they ignored the fly swatters that Ruby and Othella waved at them, it was a pleasant evening.
“Babies? You want to marry Wes and have his babies? Why?” Ruby asked, stunned, surprised, and disappointed. She didn’t even like to think about having to share Othella with a husband and a baby, just when she was getting to really know her and enjoy her company.
“I am goin’ to have somebody in my life that I know will love me,” Othella said with the sad look of an unwanted puppy on her face. She toyed with a loose thread on the top buttonhole of her flimsy white jumper.
“You got all of them sisters and brothers and your mama, not to mention all of them kinfolks still out in the bayou. They love you,” Ruby pointed out, stunned that Othella would make such a ridiculous statement.
“Ruby Jean, you wouldn’t understand. You don’t know what it’s like to live my life.”
Ruby was puzzled and it showed on her face. “Othella, please talk with some sense.”
“I am talkin’ with some sense. My mama ain’t the best mama in the world, and everybody knows that. You have to sneak around to be friends with me, and you ain’t the only girl that has to do that. Paulette Jarvis said her mama told her if she ever caught her at my house, she was goin’ to whup her within a inch of her life. My mama is a whore, and that’s what people keep tellin’ me I am goin’ to be. She’s been a whore most of her life, and I suspect she always will be.”
Ruby gave Othella a thoughtful look. “Well, you don’t have to be no whore if you don’t want to be one.”
“That’s just it, I don’t. That’s why I want to find me a husband to take care of me. My mama is a pretty woman, and men have always paid a lot of attention to her. But she ain’t never been married. Nobody cared enough about my mama to marry her and make her more dignified so people could respect her.”
“Well, that ain’t the worst thing in the world. Your mama still got a lot of men friends. Ain’t she locked up in her bedroom with that man who shines shoes in front of the post office.”
“Yeah. She’s fuckin’ him. She’s fuckin’ him like she does all the dozens of men that trample in and out of our house every week. She don’t care who knows it. And the last thing we need in our house is another baby, because I’ll be the one takin’ care of it most of the time, not my mama.”
“I know I sure don’t want no baby right now. I’m havin’ too much fun,” Ruby said with a sigh and a shudder.
“Uh, I wanted to talk to you about that,” Othella said, giving Ruby a serious look. “You gettin’ pregnant.”
“Huh? What do you mean by that?” Ruby asked dumbly. “I ain’t pregnant, that I know of.”
“That’s just it. If you ain’t, that you know of, you need to make sure you don’t get pregnant. I hadn’t said nothin’ before on account of I figured with all them big sisters you got, they done already told you what to do to not get pregnant.” Othella didn’t like the loud gasp Ruby let out. “Oh, Lord. I guess they didn’t.”
“Well, if you know, you better tell me what I need to do to keep from gettin’ pregnant,” Ruby said gruffly.
A coal oil lamp sat on the porch floor between them and there were dozens of fireflies circling their heads. There was more than enough light for Othella to see the confused look on Ruby’s face.
“Girl, before you leave this house, I’m goin’ to give you a jug of bleach and a bottle of vinegar, and you better use it if you know what’s good for you. Mix about half a cup of each together real good, and then you douche with it every time after you’ve been with a boy—unless you want to be walkin’ around here with a baby!”
“How do you know to do stuff like that?”
Othella rolled her eyes and gave Ruby an exasperated look. “I’m a whore’s daughter, remember? Knowin’ some whore secrets is one advantage I got over girls like you.”
&n
bsp; “Oh. Well, did your whore mama tell you how to trick a man into thinkin’ you’re still a virgin?”
Othella’s jaw dropped. “No, why would a whore want to do that? Men are stupid, but they are not that stupid.”
“My sister Beulah is the first one that told me all about it. She wanted that knucklehead that she married to think she was a virgin on their weddin’ night.” Ruby laughed.
“Well, even I know that that’s a damn lie.” Othella clucked like a setting hen. “Beulah was no virgin when she got married. I used to see her comin’ and goin’ from the juke joints with that bug-eyed woman’s husband that lives on Pike Street. And I know he’s a cockhound because he was visitin’ my mama back then, and still is.”
“And Beulah told me that some of my other sisters tricked their husbands into thinkin’ they were virgins, too,” Ruby added with a smug look on her face. “They used the same trick she used.”
Othella gave Ruby an impatient look. “Well, are you goin’ to tell me exactly what this virgin trick is, or do I have to sit here and try and guess it?”
“Oh, it must not be that big of a secret if my sisters all know about it. Beulah said that the women in Europe have been pullin’ this trick for a long time. All you have to do is get some chicken blood and open up a capsule, like them big ones I take for my cramps. You drip the blood into the capsule and press it back together.” Ruby paused and swatted a few more mosquitoes.
“Is that all? How is that goin’ to make some man think you’re a virgin?” Othella wanted to know. By now, she was extremely impatient and more curious than ever.
“After you seal the capsule back up, you slide it up into your coochie. When the man puts his pecker in, it’ll bust the capsule and you’ll bleed.” Ruby sniffed. “Just like a virgin.”
