by Mary Monroe
“Babysit? Now?”
“No, not right this minute. In about a hour or so. We fixin’ to do Bible study right now, and you welcome to join us if you got a mind to.”
“I’m doin’ my Bible lesson in my room,” Ruby reminded, holding her breath, wondering what this sucker was really up to.
“You sure? Somethin’ tells me you need a group spiritual shot in the arm.”
“Arlester, don’t you worry none about me. Now if y’all want me to babysit later on, that’s fine,” Ruby snapped, surprised at how assertive she had become lately. Her brother-in-law’s silence made her nervous. It would be just like him to go running to her daddy to tattle on her for sassing a grown person, even though he was not that much older than she was.
“We’ll pay you a nickel tonight, and we’ll bring you some peanut brittle next time we come,” he finally said.
“In a hour or so? Uh, yeah. I think I can do that,” Ruby said, her ear against the door.
“All right, baby sister.”
Ruby kept her ear to the door until she heard her brother-in-law’s squeaky-shoe footsteps move back toward the living room. After she’d slathered on some of the plum-colored lipstick that she’d gotten from Othella, she crawled out of her bedroom window. Once her feet landed on the ground, she stumbled away from the house like a drunken person.
By the time she got to Othella’s house, Ike was home alone. He was in his bedroom, and already naked. Ruby had only an hour to do her business with Ike, so she immediately got naked and flopped into bed with him.
While Ruby’s family was studying the Bible and listening to some of their favorite old spirituals on the radio that evening, Ruby and Ike were humping one another like rabbits.
Ike wasn’t just good in bed, he was also a good kisser. When Ruby couldn’t make love with him, they kissed until they got tired and sometimes that was almost as good as sex to her, and to him. Like Othella, Ike had a lot of talents. He knew a lot of the swing dances, thanks to Ruby. He’d even made up a few on his own. He also played a mean piano. Since Ruby couldn’t listen to “worldly” music in her own house, she enjoyed listening to Ike tickle the keys on that old red piano that Simone had acquired. It was scarred with cigar and cigarette burns from top to bottom, even on the keys, but it still made good music.
Ruby stood behind Ike now as he sat at the piano by the living room door. They had put their clothes back on and shared the last beer in the house.
Ike had plopped down on top of an upturned empty fifty-pound lard bucket, playing some tune by somebody named Cab Calloway that he had heard on the radio.
“Ruby Jean, I heard somethin’ sure enough bad about you just before you got here,” he said out of nowhere. “I heard you been foolin’ around with other boys, makin’ me look like a fool.”
Ruby was curious as to why he had waited until after he’d made love to her to accuse her of cheating on him. “That’s a lie,” Ruby lied. “You are my first and only boyfriend.” She sniffed. “What busybody told you that?”
Ike didn’t stop playing his piano, and he didn’t turn around to face her. “It don’t matter who told me that,” he continued. “And just to let you know, more than one person told me.”
“Well, more than one person told you a damn lie,” Ruby said calmly. “Now give me some sugar.” She puckered her lips and leaned her head closer to Ike’s. She was stunned and disappointed when he gave her an annoyed look and moved his head so she couldn’t kiss him. It was such a brutal rejection, she almost burst into tears. “What’s the matter, baby?”
“Nothin’, I guess.”
Ruby dropped her head and remained silent for a few moments. She had already wasted a third of the hour that she had to spend with Ike before she returned home. “I got to go babysit my sister’s kids, so I can’t stay long this time,” she informed him.
Ike whirled around to look at her. “Oh? Well, uh, you got time to ... uh ... you know again? Mama and the rest of the family won’t be home till real late, so we ain’t got to worry about them catchin’ us.” There was a pleading look on his face.
Ruby wondered if she would ever figure out what kind of convoluted brains boys had inside their heads. Here Ike was accusing her of cheating on him, making her think that he was about to dump her. And in the next breath, he was asking her to go to bed with him again.
She also wondered what kind of convoluted brains girls like her had in their heads. Without hesitation, she planted a long sloppy kiss on Ike’s puckered lips before they literally ran back to his bedroom.
Ruby didn’t see or hear from Ike the rest of that month. But she did spend time with a few other boys.
When her period didn’t start on time the following month, even though she had done all that douching with vinegar, bleach, and vanilla extract each time after intercourse, she wasn’t that concerned. But when another month went by, and because she threw up bile three mornings in a row, she became a little concerned. But that didn’t slow her down. She didn’t miss a stride. She continued to see her boyfriends and she got so busy sneaking here and there with Othella, that she put her concerns about her late period out of her mind.
By the end of the fourth month, Ruby finally admitted to herself that she was in serious trouble. “Lord, what have I gotten myself into?” she asked herself one night that February. Even though she was big boned and more than a little plump, her belly had never protruded out from the rest of her body the way it did now. When she turned sideways, it looked like she had swallowed a small watermelon.
She had already temporarily stopped wearing tight, low-cut blouses and any other clothing that didn’t hide her expanding body. Since she wore a lot of baggy pieces anyway, nobody noticed that she had been wearing nothing but loose-fitting outfits lately.
Ruby didn’t sleep at all that night. She lay awake trying to come up with a believable story that she would eventually have to tell her family and everybody else.
CHAPTER 8
EVEN THOUGH RUBY WAS CONVINCED THAT SHE REALLY WAS pregnant this time, she tried to ignore it as much as she could. She continued to go to school and church, and she continued to prance around the house playing with her nieces and nephews when her sisters visited with their families.
Since she usually wore loose-fitting outfits most of the time now anyway, she convinced herself that she could conceal her pregnancy until the end. Hazel Lattimore, one of the neighborhood’s fastest teenage girls, had done that last year. Nobody even knew she was pregnant until she gave birth in the family’s bathroom one night.
Ruby was not worried about any of the busybodies she knew noticing her expanding stomach. When and if they did ... well, she decided that she would worry about that when and if they did. She was thankful that her bout with morning sickness had only lasted a few weeks.
Another thing she wasn’t really that worried about was the fact that she was eating even more than usual. Since she had always eaten like a big hog in front of everybody, she saw no reason for anybody to ask why she had suddenly started to eat like an even bigger hog. But her nosy brother-in-law Arlester asked her at the very next Sunday dinner!
Of all the comments for that meddlesome fool to make, he had to say the one that almost made her wet her panties.
“Ruby Jean, why do it seem like you eatin’ enough for two people these days?” he wanted to know. He gazed at Ruby with both of his bushy eyebrows raised, and one of his crooked knuckled, bony fingers aimed in her direction.
“Who me?” Ruby managed, her mouth stuffed with food.
While everybody else at the table remained silent, looking at Ruby with curious stares, Arlester continued.
“I ain’t never seen you eat no five pieces of fried chicken durin’ the same meal,” he declared. His seat was across the table from Ruby’s, so he had a direct view of her horrified face. As he chewed with his slack jaws twitching, his eyes rolled down from her face to her chest. “My Lord, you lookin’ mighty thick these days... .”
; Before Ruby could respond, her sister Lola came to her rescue. “I keep tellin’ you the girl is growin’ up—and out. By the time she’s eighteen, she’s goin’ to be just as plump as the rest of us Upshaw females.” Lola chuckled, patting her stomach, which was almost as big around as her large pear-shaped bottom.
But Lola’s husband was not through with Ruby yet. “You ain’t courtin’ yet, Ruby Jean?” he asked with a suspicious look on his face.
Damn his soul to hell! Ruby thought. She hadn’t mentioned boys or anything that had to do with courting in months to her parents. She didn’t want to do or say anything that might make them keep closer tabs on her activities.
“Ruby Jean ain’t thinkin’ about no boys yet, praise the Lord,” Reverend Upshaw offered. “If she is as smart as she looks, she’ll finish school and go on to that colored college in Bayonne, be a school teacher or a nurse, before she ties herself down with a husband and babies.” He tickled the side of Ruby’s cheek. “Ain’t that right, baby girl?”
“Um-hmm. That sure enough is right,” Ruby mumbled, nodding as she reached for another piece of chicken.
According to Ruby’s calculations, her baby was due to arrive some time in early July, only a month away. She hoped that he or she waited until after the Fourth of July holiday, which was also Othella’s birthday. That was the last day in the year that Ruby wanted to be out of commission.
CHAPTER 9
RUBY WASN’T ABOUT TO LET THE THREAT OF A TORNADO stop her from sneaking out of the house through her bedroom window tonight. She wanted to help Othella celebrate her birthday and the holiday.
But that wasn’t all.
Ruby hadn’t had any beer or sex in over two weeks, and it was beginning to get on her nerves. She knew that she could get both at Othella’s party.
“Ain’t no tornado or nothin’ else in the world goin’ to keep me from comin’ to your house tonight,” she had assured Othella earlier in the day. “And I do mean nothin’.”
“Oh, I ain’t worried about you not comin’ to my party,” Othella told Ruby. “You ain’t never missed one of my parties. If your mama and daddy can’t stop you from associatin’ with me, I know no storm can’t neither. Don’t forget to wear somethin’ that’ll keep the boys’ attention on you. That low-cut dress I stole for you last week ought to do the trick. You ain’t wore it yet, and I want to see how it looks on you. No matter what you wear, them boys will be all over us. I already told ’em how hot and horny we both been feelin’ lately... .”
But a tornado was not the only thing that was threatening to interfere with Ruby’s plans. She was also nine months pregnant with a baby that nobody even knew she was carrying.
Her labor had started at the dinner table this evening. The first contraction had shot through her belly like a red-hot bullet, while she sat eating some of the holiday barbeque and greens that her mother had prepared. The pain reminded her of the time that she’d stepped on a nail with her bare foot at a church event in Baton Rouge. She wanted to scream and roll around on the floor like she had done that time, but she managed not to. She did moan and grit her teeth though.
“Stop screwin’ up your face like that, Ruby Jean. Them greens ain’t that bitter,” her mother scolded, before her teeth chewed a wad of turnip greens to pulp.
Ruby’s father stopped gnawing on a rib bone so he could add his two cents. “And she’d better hurry up and eat everything on her plate. If that storm hits, it might be a while before our next meal.”
“Can I finish my supper in my room?” Ruby asked, already rising. “I don’t feel too good... .”
“You don’t look too good neither,” her mother quickly pointed out. “You must have the cramps again,” she added in a whisper, rolling her eyes at her husband, seated directly across the table from her. She could tell from the grimace on his face that this was not a conversation that he wanted to hear. “And I ain’t never seen that many pimples on your face.”
“Yessum. Cramps again,” Ruby responded with a cough and another moan. “And my acne is actin’ up.”
“It must be that homemade lye soap you been scrubbin’ your face with. I’ll get you some witch hazel this weekend. Finish your dinner in your room. But don’t get too comfortable in case we have to haul ass to the root cellar to dodge that tornado,” her mother told her. “And don’t forget to say your prayers.”
“Yessum. Uh, ’night, y’all,” Ruby muttered as she wobbled across the floor, holding her plate with both hands.
Her mother nodded. Her father grunted and kept his eyes on the huge plate of food in front of him. He didn’t look up until Ruby had left the room. Then he stopped chewing and shot a hot look at his wife. “Hell’s bells, Ida Mae. I wish you and Ruby Jean wouldn’t discuss them female issues at the table while we eatin’. That subject is so ... gruesome,” he complained. “Pass the biscuits, please.”
Ruby’s mother practically threw the bowl with the biscuits at her husband. “Look, old man, you done spent a whole lot of years in this house with eight women—me and them seven daughters we got. What do you expect? You ought to be used to female issues by now.”
“Well, I ain’t! Even though”—Reverend Upshaw paused and glanced over his shoulder toward the doorway—“even though ... that’s what’s torturin’ poor Ruby Jean today. Her face ain’t never been as bloated as it is now. But there might be somethin’ else goin’ on with her that she don’t want us to know about. After I finish my supper, I’m goin’ to go get Dr. Hollis and have him come take a look-see at her.”
“That ain’t such a bad idea. Maybe I can get him to check my blood pressure,” Ruby’s mother said as she speared a large chicken wing on her plate with her fork. “Don’t forget to take your raincoat and cap with you in case the rain starts back up before you make it over there and back home.”
It was a good thing that Ruby had stopped in the hallway to eavesdrop on her parents’ conversation. Had she not, she would have had a major mess on her hands. There was no way in the world that she would have been able to hide her pregnancy from Dr. Hollis, even though he was practically blind and hadn’t practiced medicine in twenty years.
She held her breath and strolled back into the dining room, still holding her plate with both hands. “I feel so much better,” she announced. She returned to her seat and dropped down with a thud.
Both of her parents were surprised to see her back at the table, and even more surprised to hear that she was feeling “so much better.”
“You feelin’ better already? You just left here a minute ago,” Ruby’s father said, concerned but relieved. He didn’t really want to go out again tonight to get the practically blind doctor anyway. “I was goin’ to go fetch Dr. Hollis.”
Ruby laughed and waved her hand. “I don’t need no doctor and you don’t need to bring that old man out in this weather, tornado brewin’ and all.”
“Well, you still look peaked to me,” Ruby’s mother insisted.
“And bloated,” her father added.
“It’s just my monthly, y’all. I can’t help myself.” Ruby pouted. “I’m bleedin’ a little heavier than usual this month, so I hope I don’t get no blood on this chair,” she muttered, rocking from side to side. She glanced at her spacious lap, thankful that her voluminous duster hid her condition so well. “That was why I asked if I could eat in my room. I know how much it cost to clean these quilted seat cushions... .”
“You can take your plate back to your room and finish your supper there,” her father said with a heavy sigh. “But don’t you leak no pot liquor or no barbeque sauce on your new bedspread.”
“Or no blood,” her mother said sharply.
Ruby finished her meal in her room. Then she locked her door, not that it was necessary. Her parents rarely disturbed her when she was in her room. She locked up this time because she didn’t want them to barge in on her while she was getting dressed and making up her face for the party.
CHAPTER 10
WITH SIX OLDER SISTER
S AND SEVERAL OTHER FEMALE RELATIVES of child-bearing age, Ruby knew enough about childbirth to know that a woman’s first baby usually took his or her time to enter the world.
She had decided that she had enough time to go to the party, dance, drink, and fool around with the boys for at least two hours. She would make it back home in time to have her baby—which meant she’d be a new mother before midnight. By that time, both of her parents would be asleep. She’d give birth in her bedroom.
“You can forget about haulin’ water to the root cellar. We won’t need to take cover now. The weatherman on the radio just said that the tornado threat is over,” Ruby’s mother yelled to her from outside Ruby’s bedroom door.
“Uh, yessum. Um ... I think I’ll just stay in my room and turn in early tonight,” Ruby yelled back. “My cramps done got a little worse.”
“And it’s your own fault! I warned you when you first started havin’ your monthly that you shouldn’t be runnin’ around outside with your hair or feet wet, but you did. Now you sufferin’. I’ll make you some ginger tea, and I’ll get in your bed with you and rub your stomach till you go to sleep. I wish you had said somethin’ sooner before your daddy took out his teeth and put on his long johns. He’s itchin’ to get in the bed hisself! But I can still send him to get Dr. Hollis if you want me to.”
Ruby’s head almost exploded. “Oh no, Mama! You don’t have to do all that! I ain’t that sick!” She paused and glanced around her room, her eyes resting on the makeup and shoes on her bed that she was going to wear to the party. “Uh, you go on to bed now. I’ll be just fine.” She held her breath and listened. She had eaten in such a hurry, barbeque sauce was on her chin and lips. She licked her lips and wiped her chin with the back of her hand, still holding her breath and listening for her mother’s response.
