by Jenna Stone
“Ye may want tae write him back. Yer family seems worrit about ye and they’re wondering why ye have no taken the time tae write before now,” he said, eyes studying me intensely, clearly wondering the same thing. “Mayhap ye have been sae taken up with entertaining the needs of my brother that ye havena had the time,” he goaded, openly disapproving of the happiness that Devon and I had found in a marriage that he had intended to be an inconvenience.
“I’ll do that,” I said, ignoring the bait that he was offering. I took the letter, and walked purposefully from the room.
The letter felt like a poison in my hand. I had never thought that mere words had the potential to be so deadly.
I walked directly back to our chambers, closed the door quietly behind me and slid the deadbolt into place. I leaned back against the massive wooden door and lifted the seal on the letter, fingers trembling so much that I almost dropped it. I said a small prayer and then forced my eyes down to read the paper, heart hammering in my ears.
“Dearest Catherine,” it said.
My heart nearly stopped and my breath came out in a disbelieving shudder. I dropped the letter to the flagstone floor and I crumpled to the floor with it. I had guessed wrong. She spelled Catherine with a “C.”
I’m ruined! Exposed. It’s over…
It would now be only a matter of weeks before I was exposed as a fraud, exposed as the imposter that I was. The world that I had tentatively built with Devon was coming crashing down around me. I knew that I could not live under the rouse of an assumed identity forever, but I had hoped to have just a little more time. I allowed myself to fall apart and I cried for both Catherine and myself. I cried for the life that I had lost and I cried for the new life that I had built, knowing that it was built on lies that were about to unravel at the seams.
I cried because I was about to hurt the man that I loved despite having the best of intentions.
I have to tell him.
Chapter Nineteen
“What!” he exclaimed. “Ye ken about the Kama Sutra?” Shock was evident on his face. His eyes were wide. “Ye know what it is?” he questioned, looking at me in disbelief, mouth hanging open, anticipating my reply.
“I’ve heard of it, I mean… I know what it is about,” I said, suddenly embarrassed. “How did you hear of it?” he questioned, eyes inquisitive as he placed the heat back on me.
I rose from the floor and settled myself on his lap in the huge char. I tucked my heels up under my bottom and reached up to massage the back of his neck.
“You know how I told you about MacAllister, the man that my father had wanted me to marry?”
“Yes, how could I forget the bastard?” Devon said, tensing beneath me.
“He sent it to me as a betrothal gift,” I said, face flushing with color as I remembered opening the package. I had always loved to read and initially I was overjoyed to have a book of my own. And then, I opened the cover and saw the pictures. “When I opened it and I saw what it was about, I threw it into the fire,” I said quietly, remembering the sickening feeling that had overtaken me as I understood the true meaning of MacAllister’s gift.
“A betrothal gift! What a disgusting man,” Devon seethed, imagining what audacity it had taken for the old man to send such a manual to his bride-to-be.
“How do you know of it?” I asked, intrigued.
“Well, my Da sent me to France when I was sixteen. For boarding school, ye ken. It’s pretty normal for the second son to go away to learn the art of war and the French are known the world around for their crafty war tactics. Aye, that feels good,” he said in reference to my hand working the tension out of his neck.
I couldn’t imagine what a journey this must have been for Devon. France must have seemed a world away from all that he had known.
“I’ll not lie tae ye, Kate. Ye ken that I’ve bedded women before ye and that’s where I learned of the Kama Sutra. It was no but a means to satisfy the needs of the flesh, the needs of a boy. They meant nothing tae me, Kate,” he said, lifting my chin and forcing my eyes to meet his steely gaze.
I hated the thought of him being with other women and I quickly looked away.
“Look at me, Kate,” he demanded, again using his forefinger under my chin to force my eyes to meet his. “They meant nothing tae me. They meant nothing tae me, and you mean everything,” his green eyes were intense, sincere. “You are everything tae me. Until I had you, I lived only for myself. I had no fear in battle. Now, I live for ye, for the fact that I must stay alive for the sole purpose of loving and protecting ye.”
His lips settled on mine in a kiss, strong yet sweet, professing his commitment to me. “I need ye, Kate. I want ye. I’ve never gone tae battle afraid, but now I ken what fear feels like, heavy in the pit of my stomach, always in the back of my mind. The fear that I willna be strong enough tae fight, tae return to ye. I’ve never been afraid before, Kate, but now I’m terrified of leaving ye,” he confessed, shaken by what he clearly perceived as weakness.
“You will always return to me, Devon. I know it. You are strong, the leader of your men. I know that you will always return to me,” I said firmly, unshaken with my confidence in this man.
“Kate, I’m afraid I must go away again soon,” he said sternly.
“The Camerons?” I asked, knowing what his answer would be.
“Aye, I’m sorry. I hate tae leave ye, but it is my duty tae the clan.”
“Thank you for telling me.” I feigned a smile and stroked the hair at the base of his neck. “When?” I asked, fear beginning to settle in the pit of my stomach. Last time Devon left me he had nearly been killed.
“I leaned the hard way about keeping things from ye,” he smiled, rolling over the memory of my anger at his omission that he would be leaving for battle last time that he left me. “Soon. We’ll leave within the next few days.”
I placed my hand on his face and drew him towards me for a kiss. It was hard to bear the thought of him leaving again, fearing the prospect that he might not return. It wasn’t as if he was leaving for a friendly visit. He was leaving for war. He was leaving to fight a battle with enemies that were intent upon killing him. He was our Clan’s war- chief and as such was a major target in any battle.
I surrendered myself to his kiss, enjoying the intensity of his mouth on mine. It was clear that he needed my reassurance as much as I needed his. His lips slanted over mine hungrily, tongue probing and demanding. I relished the scratch of his day’s growth of beard on my face, masculine and sexy.
His hand was up my skirt, on my thigh, moving towards the heat of my desire for him. I had intentionally omitted undergarments today and his fingers quickly found what they were looking for.
“Katie, yer as slick as seaweed, wet with the wanting,” he groaned as his fingers met the wetness between my thighs.
“You have a way of doing that to me, husband,” I smiled into his hair as he placed kisses on my neck.
He bit my earlobe and rose up on his elbows to meet my eyes. “You drive me to madness, Kate. I’ll not claim to be a saint. Ye ken that I’ve been with others before ye. But never, never have I had a response to a woman like I have to ye. And never have I had a woman respond to me as ye do. The way yer body reacts to mine drives me to insanity. I could take ye again and again, never getting my fill. The best part is that yer mine.”
“I don’t like thinking of you being with other women.” I said bluntly.
“Never again,” he vowed. “How could I want another when I have this? This love that I share with ye. I am mad with the wanting of ye, Kate. Not just the wanting of joining with yer body, but with the wanting tae be with ye. Tae talk to ye, and to hold ye,” he looked into my eyes with an intensity that broke my heart. “I love ye, Kate,” he whispered.
“I love you too,” I smiled, meaning every word, but feeling a pang of guilt about not being truthful about my identity with this man that I loved so much. I knew that it would kill him when he found out and he was going t
o find out soon. I needed to find a way to tell him, to confess my lies.
“I love ye sae much that it pains me, a chuisle mo chroi,” he said, stroking the hair away from my face. “I’ve never been worrit about going away to battle, but now, now…” he sighed, trailing off. “Now that I have ye depending on me, I have someone that I need tae live for. Part of what made me sae fearless in battle was the fact that I only had me tae worry about. It didn’t matter if I was killed as long as the clan was all right. Now it matters.”
I reached up and kissed the worry from his lips.
“Damn right it matters. I know that you will return safely to me, Devon, I don’t doubt it for even a second.”
“Do ye ken that I felt it from the moment that I first saw ye before the fire in the great hall when ye were wielding that wee needle?” he smiled, fingers tracing the line of my breasts as they rose and fell at the top of my gown. “Even then I felt it, the connection that we have. I was scared to death when Collin decided that we were to wed. Scared because I wanted ye sae badly, but I knew that having ye as my wife would make me vulnerable to my enemies. Vulnerable because I have never had something, someone that they could use tae harm me with. I’m just worrit that Collin will see how much ye mean to me and use it against me. If harm came to ye, it would kill me, Kate.”
“Take me with you, then.”
“Ye ken that I canna, lass. I’ll be worrit about ye enough as it is. I canna be worrit about where ye are during the battle. I can’t afford to be preoccupied, or I might return to ye missing a few important parts.”
“Take me with you and I’ll trail behind, I’ll hide in the forest.”
“I’ll not risk it. War is something that I’ll not willingly expose ye to. I’ll feel much better leaving ye in Nathan’s care.”
“I’m just worried about staying here without you,” I confessed. “I see the way that Collin watches me, watches us constantly, and it worries me.”
“Collin kens that if he sae much as touches ye, I’ll kill him. Brother or no,” he said defiantly. “I don’t think he’s brave enough tae make a move against me, but he’s as slippery as a snake in the grass and that’s why I’m leaving Nathan and a few others behind tae make sure yer protected.”
We passed a moment in silence, churning over our thoughts about his imminent departure, and the conditions that I would face remaining behind at the keep.
“Make love tae me, Kate. Restore my strength and give me a reminder of what I’m fighting for,” he said smiling in a most devilish way as his fingers began stroking the wetness between my thighs.
I answered his request with a kiss, prodding him on with my mouth, expressing that I needed the fulfillment of his body too. I clung to him, relishing to strength of his muscles beneath me, supporting me as he gently tormented me with his fingers beneath my dress. I raked his back with my nails, marking his body as mine as he kissed my neck and slowly removed his fingers from between my thighs.
“I need ye, lass. I canna be gentle,” he warned, pushing me up into a standing position. He stood from the chair and removed his shirt and kilt, now standing completely naked in front of the fire. My eyes scanned his body; he was beautiful in the firelight.
“Don’t then,” I challenged, pressing myself against him to meet his need. The fabric of my dress was constraining and I longed to have my skin exposed so that I could feel him against the length of my body. “Unlace me,” I demanded, turning my back to him, pressing my bottom against him in a way that I knew drove him mad.
His fingers quickly undid the laces of my dress and he slid it slowly down my body, running his fingers across my breasts and belly as the gown cascaded into a pool of cloth at our feet. His skin felt so warm against mine. I pressed against him as he wrapped me in his arms. I cradled his erection with my bottom and let my head fall back against his shoulder as he brought goosebumps out on my skin by running his fingers ever so lightly over my naked breasts.
“Mmmm….ye feel sae good against my skin. Sae soft and warm,” he said, as if reading my mind.
I wanted to worship his body as he had worshiped mine.
I turned in his arms and slowly slid my hands down his chest as I knelt on the floor in front of him. My eyes flashed up to his in question, seeking permission to touch him so intimately.
His mouth was open, his eyes wild with passion as he guessed what I was about to do. He gave me the slightest nod of invitation and I bit my lower lip in anticipation, wondering just how I should start.
My fingers circled his cock and he let out a gasp as I opened my mouth and slowly licked the tip of his arousal.
“Kate,” he growled, shuddering as he fought to remain in control.
As I took him fully into my mouth, he let out a groan of ecstasy and twisted his hands into my hair. I made love to him with my mouth, stroking him with my hands, enjoying the feeling of him shuddering under my touch, barely holding onto his control. I drove him to the brink of orgasm, then slowly withdrew him from my mouth and looked up to meet his eyes.
“Promise you won’t be gentle?” I said, inviting him to use me for his pleasure, throbbing with the need to feel him inside me.
“Aye,” he growled, pulling me to my feet, eyes wild with desire. “Back down on the floor with ye, I want tae take ye as I was thinking about earlier,” he commanded.
I obeyed his order and lowered my hands onto the rug before the fire and pressed back until my bottom was up in the air, giving Devon a delightful view and bringing his fantasy to life. He was standing behind me in an instant, his hands grasping my hips as he growled and entered me without hesitation. I moaned with pleasure as his cock stretched me fully, driving forcefully in and out with each stroke. He used my hips as leverage to thrust deep inside me, causing my breasts to bob beneath me with each powerful thrust. My fingers twined in the wool of the rug, curling with the pleasure that I felt as he took me so forcefully, with so much need.
His manhood bucked as the first wave of his orgasm overtook him. He thrust into me one final time and called out, letting his back arch in response to the power of his release as he came inside of me.
Placing one hand on my bottom to steady himself, he reached his other hand around in front of me to tease the nub in the folds of my womanhood. The mere touch of his fingertips on my slick skin brought me to orgasm, and he stroked me gently while thrusting inside of me, already hard with desire again.
“Aye, love, let it happen. Ye feel sae good,” he coaxed, stroking and encouraging me to let go and enjoy the deeper waves of my orgasm as he supported my body. “Aye, let go, release, Kate. It feels sae good, does it no?” he said, slowing the speed of his caresses and thrusts as I finished my orgasm, the final tremors flooding my body. He gave one final thrust and spilled his seed again deep inside of me.
We collapsed on the floor, exhausted from the fury, the wild need of our love making. I laid my head on his chest as we settled down on the rug in front of the fire, caressing each other and enjoying the afterglow of sex.
“Did I hurt ye?” he asked, gently brushing my hair behind my ear.
“No, you didn’t hurt me,” I whispered, fingers dancing across his chest in the firelight.
“Ye would tell me if I did?” he said softly, concerned.
“I would tell you, but no, you didn’t hurt me. In fact, it was quite the opposite. I liked it,” I said, now slightly embarrassed. “I could feel how much you wanted me.”
“Och, lass, I want ye all the time. I just felt like I lost control a bi, and I never want tae hurt ye,” he said.
I lifted my head from his chest and propped myself up on one elbow so that I could see his face. His hair was just beginning to grow back, and it curled slightly at the ends, giving him a boyish look in the glow of the fire.
“You would never hurt me, Devon,” I whispered and leaned in to kiss him softly. I knew that there was truth in my words. Devon would never hurt me and it made me hate myself even more because I was on the edge of h
urting him very badly. The worst part was that I didn’t know how to prevent this hurt from happening.
He left for war with the Camerons two days later. We held each other silently in the courtyard of the keep, as if we both somehow knew, but were afraid to speak the words out loud that something was about to tear us apart.
Chapter Twenty
Laird McClain, 15 October, 1756
Your recent letter and our daughter’s marriage certificate have caused us great alarm regarding the welfare of our beloved Catherine. The name signed at the bottom of the certificate is “Katherine,” and our dear Cate spells her name with a “C.” Both my wife and I are certain that the handwriting on the certificate is not that of our daughter, which has caused us further concern. Our Catherine has always been prompt in her correspondence and although my wife and daughter have sent multiple letters to Catherine, none have been replied to. We have not heard word from Catherine since she was taken into the care of your Clan. Also, the description of our daughter that you provided in your most recent letter struck us as inaccurate. Our daughter does not have auburn hair like that you have described, hers is a light brown. I would never describe her features as “striking,” although my daughter is beautiful to my own eyes, most would see her as quite plain.
We are consumed with worry about these recent developments, longing for news from our dear Catherine. I have decided to send two men to Glenhaven, halfway between our lands to ensure that Catherine is well and safe. Please deliver her to there in one week’s time from the receipt of this letter. I must assure her safety, and as a father, I am sure that you will understand this desperate request.
Regards,
Ellis Berkshire
A smile spread across Collin McClain’s face as he let the letter fall to his desk.
“An imposter,” he said out loud. It had been a remarkable story that Nathan relayed, finding the murdered travelers along the road, yet Kate escaping unscathed. The fact that she had no memory of the attack or the names of the individuals that she had been traveling with also had not added up.
