Abandoning all sense of additional foreplay, he lowered his weight. His desperate cock found its path unerringly to her gate, and he pressed home with one smooth thrust. Air gusted from their lungs with equal ferocity, and Tahl reveled in the hot, wet slickness gripping him. Biting back a groan, he dared to kiss her, but she turned her head to the side and his lips pressed against her cheek.
Accepting the boundary, though his beleaguered heart winced, he wrapped her up and held her tightly. They rocked together, as he desperately strove to convey the intimacy of the moment. Her palms pressed against his shoulders, alternately pushing him away and drawing him close.
Somehow, her ambivalence gave him the restraint he needed to make it good for her. Swiveling his hips on every upstroke, he worked the head of his cock deep until her smooth rhythm faltered and her breathing hastened. When the walls of her channel began to tighten and flutter, he thrust harder, pushing her over.
A muffled shriek passed her lips and she sobbed against his skin. He let himself follow, buttocks clenching as he filled her with his seed in a climax that blurred his vision. “I love you, Desi.”
The only sign that she’d heard was a sharp intake of breath, and he waited in vain for any verbal response. He’d put it out there and had to trust she wouldn’t use it against him, although there was a part that regretted making himself so vulnerable.
Easing out of her, he marked the rush of their combined juices, taking comfort in the fact they had chemistry in their favor. Deciding not to clean up, reveling in the evidence of their physical connection, he positioned himself beside her. When she didn’t roll onto her side and give him her back, his chest lifted on a flicker of hope. Resting a possessive hand on her thigh, he gave over to sleep.
****
I love you, Desi. Stunned didn’t begin to cover it. After that involuntary intake of air, her vocal cords froze solid and her body felt disconnected from her brain—or controlled by her complacent wolf. How could he love her? He’d loped off into the distance all the way to the Dawnfall pack after that Alpha’s granddaughter. A shifter didn’t leave the one he loved behind.
Everything felt into chaos, any ordered thoughts swept aside, while Tahl slumbered peacefully beside her, their skin touching at shoulder and hip, his big hand lying heavily on her thigh.
Her body cooled though her mind was heated. Carefully, she shifted away, Tahl’s fingers slipping to trail to the bed, an involuntary shiver overtaking her. The firm mattress barely compressed as she swung her weight to the edge and set her feet on the floor. Her nightgown was a drift of fabric beneath her toes, and she leaned to scoop it up and drop it over her head. She instantly felt less exposed—physically. The garment did nothing to block her raw emotions.
Making her way down the hall, she shut herself in the main bathroom, flicking on the light but avoiding her reflection in the mirror. His proclamation was made in the aftermath of an orgasm, she decided. Sex made it easy to misinterpret many things, like one’s feelings, saying words a person didn’t really mean in the cold light of day—or so she’d heard.
With a shaking hand, she turned on the faucet and grabbed a cloth to clean herself up, the warm water easing her a trifle. She’d pretend she hadn’t heard him, and hope he didn’t repeat himself because at some point she’d reciprocate and then they’d be living an even more awkward, unbalanced lie.
Drying off, she tossed the cloth into the hamper and returned to his room on little cat feet, praying he didn’t wake. Tomorrow would be soon enough to face him, to cobble together some kind of front to present to him. He snored lightly, and she felt his presence intensely, her heart hammering behind the prison of her ribcage.
She slid into her space and curled up, her back to him, not even bothering to pull up the covers. I love you, Desi. Had she said something to make that true? False? Not for the first time, she cursed her so-called ability—and her inability to always watch her mouth. She was calling Marlene first thing.
Chapter Eight
Desi slept, her hands tucked beneath the pillow, cradling her head. Knees raised toward her chest, the curve of her back and high roundness of her hip painted a sweet picture. Her long, black hair partially covered her face, tendrils quivering before the onslaught of her steady breaths. Tahl’s heart ached. Finally, his, if not willingly. His wolf huffed, hardly caring about semantics, only nature.
Determined not to reflect on past circumstances, he made his morning ablutions as quietly as possible, returning to the bedroom to find her gone. The enticing smell of brewing coffee suggested her current whereabouts and he hustled to his dresser. Pulling out a drawer, he stilled. Normally a tidy person, he tended to pile in his socks and boxers, a non-issue seeing as they were all identical and there was no need to sort his socks.
Everything was neatly folded and placed in piles, like with like, and the clean fragrance of softener wafted to his nostrils. He patted one such pile in an absurd gesture, affected by the evidence of a feminine touch. Pulling his clothes on, he strode to the kitchen.
Desi gave him a faint smile, looking everywhere but at him. “Coffee’s on. I have to go in early to the shop. Michelle texted me that she’s sick.”
Shifters essentially enjoyed good health, so Tahl doubted Michelle’s excuse if she’d even made it. Was Desi running again? “I’ll put some breakfast together while you get ready.”
“I’m not hungry, thanks.”
“You need to eat, Desi. Take care of yourself.”
“I do. I’ll get something delivered.” She hurried away, swathed in the silky fabric that did little to disguise her feminine curves.
Realizing she’d been up in the night, in order to put her nightgown back on, Tahl frowned. He’d probably spooked her, chased her away with his spontaneous avowal of love. The woman turned him inside out and wrenched away his control. He was never fucking spontaneous, always thinking, considering. Yet he didn’t regret his honesty.
Crossing to the fridge, he took out some fruit, quickly washing it and placing it in a bag. Checking the expiry date, he added a container of yogurt. He hesitated and then found the bread and peanut butter. Desiree loved the sticky spread, and he built her a sandwich, cutting off the crusts and wrapping it up in plastic wrap.
He was cooking eggs when she emerged, looking gorgeous in one of those tight skirts and a sexy top. He longed to free that mane of hair, to let it spill over her shoulders and down her back, but conceded she looked professional with it upswept. Despite her smile, he detected the strain behind it.
“I made you some breakfast, and a go-cup.”
“Oh. Thank you.” She drew her purse strap higher to slip the sack over her wrist and clutched the cup in her other hand alongside her keys.
“Any idea what time you’ll be home?”
“After closing. But I need to pick up groceries.”
He nearly offered to take on that chore but sensed she felt a real need to contribute. “I’ll watch for you, help you carry them in.”
“Sure.” She sketched an awkward wave and inched toward the exit.
He matched her pace and then closed the distance, opening the door for her. Taking advantage of her having her hands full, he grasped her shoulders to tug her close and pressed a kiss on her forehead. “See you tonight. We’ll talk about the party over dinner.”
With a startled look, she nodded and tapped toward her car on those amazing shoes. He stood like a statue, watching her sexy stride, wrestling with the desire to haul her back in the house and to the bedroom where he’d keep her occupied for the next several hours.
Returning to his eggs, now cooked solid to a rubbery texture, he scraped them into the trash. He threw together another sandwich and grabbed his go-cup. Jett had an emissary coming from a far-flung pack in Canada, and his place was at his Alpha’s shoulder.
River again greeted him at the door, looking considerably better than the day before. Once upon a time he’d simply disarmed the system and walked inside, but that changed aft
er the rogue attack. Now, everyone was scrutinized by security cameras and only then allowed admittance.
His Alpha’s mate smiled. “Morning. Jett’s in the study.”
He touched her forearm. “You doing okay?”
“I am, thanks. You?”
“Good.”
“Oh, that’s good.” She smoothed down the front of her shirt and avoided his gaze. “How’s Desi?”
“She’s fine. Had to go into the shop.”
“I know. She texted me. It’s a good thing Marlene can count on her, seeing as Michelle isn’t always reliable.”
He’d admit to a wave of relief that his mate hadn’t lied to him in order to flee. “She’s a hard worker.”
“She always has been, despite how others sometimes perceive her.”
He’d been one of them, he knew. Chastising Desi on the amount of money she spent, when it hadn’t been any of his business. Except back then he’d felt as though it was. “I know her pretty well, River. Though I guess I saw what I wanted to see, sometimes.”
“But things are going okay?”
“We’re finding our way. Not exactly an auspicious start, but I care about her and I’ll do right by her.”
“I believe you.” Hesitating, as though she wanted to say something else but thought better of it, she gestured for him to pass. “I’m to entertain the emissary’s mate, so I’d better get a few things ready.”
“River?”
“Yes?”
“Desi told Jett it was more than her pride getting in our way.”
“He told me that too.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “I … I called her last night to see if I could help, but it went nowhere. I feel like I’m betraying her, even talking to you about it, but it freaked Jett, so I’m bothered too.”
“She’s stubborn. I doubt she’ll tell me.”
“Maybe we should ask Marlene.”
He hadn’t thought of that. Did women confide in their mothers? Especially when it involved rejection? Some might, but he doubted Desi would. “Better you ask her.”
“I will. As soon as she returns.”
“It might put a strain on your relationship, River.”
“It might. But then Marlene and I struggle some anyhow. I think it’s worth it because I’m worried about my friend.”
“Thanks.”
“I didn’t say I’d share it with you.”
He had to accept that. Jett would insist he be advised if it was relevant. He trusted his Alpha and his Alpha trusted his mate.
Jett was ensconced behind his desk, clicking through something on his laptop. Tahl preferred paper if he had to pore over anything, and said as much.
With a grunt, his Alpha replied, “I don’t have enough storage room as it is. Just going over the documents the Alpha of Wide Sky sent over. Pretty straightforward as an alliance goes. They’re asking that we house a few of their younger members and are willing to reciprocate.”
“What? Like an exchange kind of thing?”
“Right. I suspect their isolation is proving to be an issue when it comes to mating.”
“Not such a bad idea,” Tahl allowed.
“It’s not. We have all those females we absorbed after rescuing them from the rogues. I’m thinking some of them might be interested in moving. Especially the ones who aren’t fitting in as well here as they’d hoped. River mentioned they feel like everyone here knows their story, and it stands to reason if they move to Wide Sky, there won’t be that history. They can share what they want to.”
“It could work.”
Jett swiveled away from the computer and stood. “They’ll be here shortly. Anything new with my sister?”
“Nothing. If I push her on her comment to you, I expect she’ll feel ganged up on.”
“You’re right. I’ve already betrayed her, in her eyes, so hopefully she’ll share in time.”
He doubted it somehow, a deep intuition, but shrugged. “River is going to ask your mother.”
Jett laughed. “Marlene is more likely to tell my mate than me. I get to thinking I know women, then I’m proven wrong.”
Dismissing the mystery of Desiree, they went to meet the emissary of Wide Sky. Tahl wondered why the Alpha hadn’t made the trip, quickly asking Jett.
“Something to do with being refused entrance at the border. And something we’ll need to nail down with his representative. Because we’re not going down the same path as Dawnfall.”
“It’s hardly the same thing, Alpha. Hell, Ashton didn’t understand the full extent.”
“But he wasn’t totally forthcoming. There are pack secrets and then there are dangerous secrets, Tahl. I’m done with those. You took care of it, but we might not get so lucky next time.”
There wasn’t time for further discussion, as his Alpha strode forward to open the door. Only one guard was present, to complement the emissary’s protection, and Benjamin lounged close by. Appearances were deceiving. He could leap into action as fast—or faster—than even Jett. Recently coming of age, and with brains as well as brawn, Benjamin was on the fast track toward joining the Council.
A tall, spare shifter offered his hand and Jett took it. “Welcome to Blue Star.”
****
It had been a long, boring day for the most part. Desiree wasn’t inundated with customers, which should have given her lots of time to connect with her mother, but Marlene wasn’t available. Or wasn’t answering her phone on purpose.
With too much time on her hands, she fretted. And fretted some more.
The product held no interest for her, though she straightened the racks and dusted the displays. She did her best to focus and nearly fell on the occasional woman who popped in to browse, likely driving them away with her desperation.
By the end of the day, she was exhausted from doing pretty much nothing. And she had yet to face Tahl. She closed up and headed for her favorite market, shopping with care, burning daylight. She hadn’t let herself think about the sex preceding Tahl’s assertion, though vignettes flitted through her consciousness all day.
It had had nothing of the urgency of the other times, felt sweeter, more intimate, and far more dangerous. She needed to keep such a connection at arm’s length from here on out. Resolved, she paid for her purchases and loaded them into the car.
Driving home, her belly tightened and she forced herself to relax. Tahl would never find out about her ability and she could still guard her heart. She wouldn’t stomp on his or use any softer feelings against him. She wouldn’t.
True to his word, Tahl came out to the vehicle and helped carry in the bags. His tall figure now sported faded jeans that he filled out admirably, and she kept her looks to herself. Together they put the purchases away.
“How were things at the shop?” He gently took a heavy sack from her.
“Quiet.” She cast around for something else to say. “How was your day?”
“Eventful. We met with the emissary from Wide Sky. We’re forging an alliance.”
“That’s great.” She meant it. In her mind, the more the packs connected, the better it was for shifters overall. They’d fragmented in the past with factions arguing over territory, and the best way to interact with humans. Many shifters avoided them all together, but with the population explosion and secular groups being regarded with suspicion, even those packs were forced to assume an acceptable front.
Tahl lifted a shoulder. “We’re seen as a progressive pack, and we attract the clans with more than their share of younger shifters.”
Chatting desultorily about the pros and cons of being perceived as progressive, they made short work of the task.
“I ordered pizza, Desi. Is that okay?”
“What kind?”
“Half bacon, pepperoni and fresh mushroom, half cheeseburger. Okay?”
Her belly fluttered. Her favorites. “Sounds good. I’ll go change.”
The heat of his stare followed her as she headed for her room. Her office slash dressing room. Her winter
clothes took up half the space in his closet, and the spare room was jammed full. Tahl always looked good, and he owed his fair share of clothing, so she could probably purge a little.
Slipping into some comfortable yoga pants and a loose t-shirt—pizza tended to require a little more room—she took a deep breath. Maybe the evening wouldn’t be such a trial.
He scanned her from head to toe and her wolf stretched onto its toes, obviously not getting the message that her heat was assuaged and a child growing as a result. She made herself move casually into the living room, and chose a chair opposite from where Tahl sat on the couch.
“Have you given any thought as to when you want to have our announcement party?”
Lacing her fingers together, she said, “Depends on where you want to hold it.”
“Not here. Not enough room.”
The idea of the entire pack descending on them was beyond daunting.
“Desiree, I’ll be there.”
He’d read her mind—or more likely, her body language. “Right. It’ll be fine.”
“It will. You faced down the majority of the females.”
He was teasing, and surprisingly the reminder of his conquests didn’t bite as hard. It was in the past… She brought herself up hard. Past or not, things gone by had a nasty habit of surfacing. With a forced smile, she said, “We can’t ask Jett and River to offer their home. Not with the kids.”
“True enough. They were out with the nanny today and the house still felt full. And her sister, Cassie, is coming to stay for a while.”
“Maybe we could rent someplace, have it catered…”
“I vote we issue a blanket invitation like Marlene did for River and Jett. People tend to get offended if left out, even inadvertently.”
She knew Tahl could identify each and every pack member without effort. At least they didn’t have to ask the leaders of other packs. Only alphas followed that tradition. “All right. I’ll find a venue.”
Undone By Destiny Page 10
