by Mira Maxwell
I try to distract myself when I get back to my room. I stoke the fire to get it going strong again. It’s toasty warm now but that just makes me think of Ozmyx. He made the fire in the first place, I’ve just been taking care of it to make sure it doesn’t go out. Next, I look through my things for something I can take to help my back feel better. I take two pain relievers with water but I’d also like to reapply some more antibiotic ointment. My wound is in a tricky place, though, and I could really use a hand from somebody that can see what they’re doing.
My mind keeps drifting back to thoughts of Ozmyx and where he has gone off to. I know I’m not going to be able to sleep until I see him again and find out what’s going on with him. So, I finally decide to throw my winter jacket back on and all of the rest of my snow gear and go after him.
I avoid the courtyard where the party is still going strong, I know he won’t be there. I walk the perimeter of the wall, checking the different posts to see if Ozmyx is occupying one of them. I’ve gone a decent way around the wall, and am starting to feel tired, when my heart starts pounding stronger in my chest. My skin starts tingling as if it knows that Ozmyx’s touch is within reach. I almost walk right past him. We’re at the back of the fortress, the section that is built directly from the side of the mountain. There isn’t a need for the warriors to watch this section of the wall because there’s no way anything could get through a mountain.
“There you are,” I say, trying to hide the annoyance I’m feeling from my voice. “What are you doing back here? Hiding?”
“I am not hiding. I wanted to be alone.” I clearly grasp the meaning of his words and it stings in a way that I didn’t expect. It’s one thing to be upset about the turn of events tonight. It’s another to push me away because of it.
“Great. You’ve had your alone time, haven’t you?” I don’t like his cold demeanor or the wall he’s trying to put up between us right now. I know exactly what he’s trying to do. Because of everything that has happened, he wants to push me away. “Now it’s time to come back and figure this all out.”
“I am not ready to return. But you should go.”
He turns away, refusing to look at me. I don’t know if it’s anger or hurt boiling my blood right now, but whatever is it, it sucks. I don’t know if I can physically make myself turn away from him and return to my room. This bond between us is strong.
“Fine. I will go. But when your cock aches for me in the middle of the night you’ll have to use your hand to satisfy your urges.”
My words are strong but I turn away on shaky legs. I want to burst into tears but I force myself to stomp away from him as fast as possible. I don’t know why I opened my heart to this big lug in the first place. I should have known from the beginning that it would end this way.
Somehow I keep walking all the way back to my room and I don’t let a single tear escape until I’m alone under my furs.
I finally fall asleep from exhaustion. I’m not sure how much later it is when I wake up, way too warm under my furs. The fire is still going but it has died down to a soft glow. I kick off the furs to cool down and instantly start shaking. Suddenly I’m freezing. I pull the furs back over me as my entire body begins to shake. I feel my forehead and can tell immediately that I’m feverish. My body is shaky as I pull myself up so I can get the fire burning strongly again.
I grab another fur to put on top of me before I snuggle back down. Once I’m under the covers again, I feel so thirsty I need to get up again to grab my canteen. I take a long drink, thinking the entire time what awful timing it is to get sick right now. While I’m up, I dump out the contents of my pack searching for the small bottle of pills I have that help give your immune system a power boost. I chew one and swallow it down with another swig of water. Hoping that’ll do the trick and I’ll be feeling better by morning, I crawl back under the covers and try to go to sleep.
Somehow I’m aware that I’m having the strangest dreams throughout the night. At first Diana is with me. Her belly is swollen with child one minute and the next we’ve all gone back in time to when this whole crazy adventure began, crash landing on this planet. I can feel the ship crashing through the atmosphere again and I want to reach for my barf bag but it isn’t there because I’m just free falling from space until I land in a huge pile of snow that consumes me like quick sand.
I choke on the snow until Ozmyx pulls me out and I can see his face and breathe the air again.
“Tell me how I can help you,” he says. And I feel warm inside because he’s acting like he cares about me again. I try to remind myself that this is just a dream and he has washed his hands of me, but I see his face and want to believe the fantasy.
“Stay with me,” I tell him. Now that I’ve spoken, his face comes into focus and I’m looking at his chiseled features, his eyes so expressive, his lips so plump and kissable. And it’s a dream so it’s safe to tell him how much I do love his lips. “I could kiss your lips forever,” I say.
But instead of getting to kiss him, his face is gone and Diana is back again. “Well I love you too but I don’t want to kiss you,” I tell her.
Instead she asks me what Ozmyx already has. “Tell us how we can help you, Savannah.”
But this can’t be Diana because her face is filled with sorrow and her cheeks are wet from tears. Diana is the toughest of us all and I have never seen her cry. I suppose anything can happen in a dream.
“It’s just a fever,” I tell her. I don’t want her to cry anymore. “The fever will pass.”
And now I can’t talk anymore. I’m trying to make my mouth move but it won’t move like I want it to. And I want to keep my eyes open to see Diana and Ozmyx, but my eyelids are as heavy as boulders and they refuse to budge. I only try for a short time because then I’m back at my grandfather’s house. I’m studying for my medical school exams and he has fallen asleep in the chair next to me. I set my book on the coffee table and gently tap his shoulder.
“Come on grandpa,” I say. “You fell asleep. I’ll help you to bed.”
“Don’t be silly. I’m keeping you company while you study. So go on and do what you need to do. I’ll be here when you’re done.” Without waiting for my answer, he pulls the blanket over his shoulders and goes back to sleep. There has never been any question as to where I got my stubborn streak from.
I go back to my studies but I keep hearing my grandpa say, “We need a doctor, we need a doctor.” And that’s the last thing I remember because everything has gone black.
Eighteen
OZMYX
I’ve never felt more helpless in my entire life.
I’m sitting on the floor next to Savannah, wanting to help in any way I can but so helpless at the same time. Mallyk had no idea how the news of Savannah would affect me. He doesn’t know that we mated. So when he approached me asking me to return to the ship for medical supplies, that one of the women was sick, I didn’t know that it was Savannah. I assumed she would be coming with me on the journey again. But I should have known it was her. I could feel it inside of me from the moment she walked away last night. I thought it was guilt that I was feeling, but I should have listened to our bond and known that she was in trouble.
And now here I sit, in her room on the floor next to her, holding her hand unable to leave her side. Moments ago she started to talk but she didn’t open her eyes and it didn’t make any sense.
“We need a doctor,” Diana tells Mallyk. She’s frantically pacing the room, repeating her demand. I understand why she’s frantic, the one person that we need right now is unconscious on the floor. Whatever it is, it’s more than a fever. Something has taken hold of her in the night and no matter how hard I try, I can’t bring her back to me.
I’ve never been so close to despair when it finally hits me and I can’t believe I didn’t think of it sooner.
“There’s a doctor,” I say suddenly, breaking into the silence. Diana and Mallyk both stop and look at me, their faces lighting up with hope for the
first time all morning. “He’s a wanderer…Edek. He’ll know what to do.”
“Do you think he’d be willing to come here to help her?” Mallyk asks. He knows our history too well and none of us would blame them for not trusting us. But I’m desperate and at this point, it’s our only hope.
“He likes Savannah. He’ll do it for her. I’ll beg him, offer him anything he wants.”
Mallyk nods, warming to the idea. “Of course, do what you must. Offer him an alliance, a peace between our people…whatever you have to do. We cannot let her die like this.”
With Mallyk’s approval to leave the walls, I’m instantly ready to go. I lean down and rest my face in Savannah’s hair, breathing in her scent. “Wait for me, my queen,” I whisper quietly into her ear. I memorize every detail of her face as quickly as I can before I have to force myself to release her hand and leave her behind. I will do this for her. I will beg Edek to help me, no matter what it costs. I leave her room without looking back, telling myself that I’ll see her again when I return.
Luck seems to be on my side as I take off at a run through the snow-covered landscape. It isn’t snowing and there isn’t even a breeze to hold me back. With pristine weather like this, I should be able to find Edek in a few hours, if not sooner. The problem that I quickly discover is that the only times we’ve seen the wanderers are when they have wanted to be found. The first time we crash landed into their caves and then the second time they were offering their assistance to us in the storm. And both times, Savannah was with me. I’m sure she was the reason they offered help in the first place.
Luckily, I have an excellent memory. I’m heading back to where we were in the blizzard when we were offered assistance the second time. They would have closed the cave off by now after we fell into it from the woods. So even though that’s closer, my chances are better where I’m headed. My eyes are down, searching for tracks in the snow…or any indication as to where an entrance to the cave system might be hiding. The wanderers do an excellent job blending in with their environment. From my experience, you’ll only see them if they allow it. In fact, there’s probably someone watching me right now.
I circle around the rock formations that look familiar but all I see is snow and rock. I have very little patience right now. I know time is of the essence. I need to find Edek and bring him back to Savannah as quickly as possible. After tracking through the snow in circles, I finally just stand still and take in everything around me. It’s so quiet, unusually so. There’s no breeze, no sounds of the animals that lurk in the mountains, nothing. And now I sense that I’m being watched.
I take my chances and shout, “Edek! I need your help, Edek!”
My voice sounds loud, interrupting the stillness that surrounds me. But I can’t afford to waste any more time. I slowly scan the landscape, back and forth, waiting for an indication that I’ve been heard. It takes longer than I hoped.
“Please!” I shout. “Savannah needs your help!”
It’s fine if they want to leave me to rot out here but I know Edek would want to help Savannah. They formed a bond from the very beginning. Their connection through their knowledge of medicine was strong enough to make me jealous. And if that’s the case, it’s strong enough that Edek won’t just let her die.
I turn around again, searching for a sign. This time, I see him. Covered completely in white, blending into the snow-covered rocks behind me. Our eyes meet and I turn to face him. For the first time in a long time, I’m unsure of what to do next. I don’t know how to show my submission. It isn’t a tactic I’ve ever needed before.
When the wanderer doesn’t move toward me, I decide to make myself vulnerable by going down on my knees. I display my hands in front of me and lower my head. He can chain me if he wants, I won’t fight it. I don’t raise my head even when I sense that the wanderer has moved closer to me. After a few moments when the chains don’t come, I look up. The wanderer before me isn’t Edek and all I can think is the time we’ll have to waste finding him.
“Please help me find Edek,” I say. “Savannah, the human doctor, is very sick. We don’t know how to help her. I know Edek will know what to do.”
The wanderer says, “We’ve sent word to Edek. He will be here shortly.”
“Is he bringing medicine to help her?”
“Of course,” the wanderer says. “He always has his supplies on hand.”
I’m able to relax, just a small amount, knowing that Edek is on his way and we will very soon be heading back to Savannah. I can’t stop thinking about what has gone wrong. How could she get so sick over night? And above all of it, is the fact that I was so cold to her the last time we spoke. I keep cursing myself that I let her just walk away. It was stupid and selfish of me. The news that Mallyk and Diana are having a baby shouldn’t have affected me in such a way either. I have much to make amends for.
This is how Edek finds me. A second in command Attalan warrior, kneeling in the snow at the feet of one of his fellow wanderers. I raise my head to see him hurrying towards me through the snow, his pack a heavy burden.
“Take me to her,” he says by way of greeting.
I get to my feet and quickly take his pack from him. He’s about to protest but I say, “We need to move quickly. I will carry your supplies.”
He nods his head. “Lead the way.”
We head off together. I turn after a few steps to nod and acknowledge the wanderer that helped me but he is already nowhere to be found.
Edek quickly pulls my attention back to him. “What are her symptoms?”
We’re moving at a quick pace. Now that we’re on our way back to the fortress I just want to get there. “When I left her she was feverish. I couldn’t get her to wake up and focus on me. I tried to ask her to tell me what I needed to do to help her, but she couldn’t answer me.”
“How long has she been that way?”
“I saw her before she went to sleep and she was fine. This morning, Mallyk found me and told me he needed me to travel to the human’s spaceship because he needed medical supplies. I was going to go when I found out that he was talking about Savannah. Sometime in the night she became feverish and she was already in a bad way when I got to her this morning.”
“And did anything happen that might have caused the fever? Was she injured in any way? Is there anyone that is sick in the fortress right now?”
“I don’t know,” I say, frustrated that I don’t have the answers he needs. “I don’t know of anyone else that is sick. No one else has had a fever like this.”
“Yes, that makes sense. It wouldn’t be common for an Attalan to have a fever like that. There must be something causing it if none of the other human females are sick.”
Now that my mind isn’t clouded with anger toward Edek, I can see what Savannah means. He has a wealth of knowledge and we’re fools not to accept it just because of our history. Savannah has humbled me in a way that I never thought possible.
“I’ll look her over as soon as we get there. I’ll figure out what’s going on and she’ll be okay,” he continues.
I don’t deserve his kindness and yet, he gives it to me. Offering me comfort when I know I haven’t done anything to earn it.
The rest of our trek back is a blur. Edek continues to ask questions and I mindlessly answer them. All I can focus on is getting back to Savannah and making sure she’s okay. There’s this strange ache in my chest and I feel jittery all over. It’s either because I’m away from my mate or because she’s still not well. I hope it isn’t anything more than that. It makes me push harder and faster through the snow. I commend Edek, he doesn’t fall behind. At one point during our journey, he pulls out some dried meat and offers some to me while he bites off a chunk himself. Food is the last thing on my mind, but I force it down. I need to stay strong for Savannah.
We finally return to the fortress. I hurry Edek through the gates and lead him back to Savannah’s room. The atmosphere is somber. Diana sits on the floor next to Savannah, ho
lding her hand. Mallyk hovers in the doorway.
“How is she?” I ask as soon as we enter the room.
“Thank God you’re back,” Diana says. “She’s no different. No better, no worse.”
Edek hurries over to her side. Diana stands up and walks over to Mallyk. He opens his arms to her and holds her close while they both watch from the doorway. I sit next to Edek, taking Diana’s place. I’m calmer now that I’m close to her again. There’s still an ache in my chest but the jittery feeling is gone.
He rolls her onto her side, lifting her shirt so he can examine the wounds on her back from the ragadh. They look like they’ve healed to me but he examines them closer.
“The wound has mostly healed but there’s still a pocket of irritation. I’m going to have a closer look at it to see if this is the source of the problem.”
Before he uses his scalpel to cut into her skin, he rubs a clear cream over the entire area. “This causes a numbing affect so she won’t be in any pain when I take a closer look under the skin.”
Once he applies the cream, he pulls off his gloves and sets them aside. While he waits for the cream to work, he pulls out a few more things from his pack. He’s moving quickly and he’s organized. It’s fascinating to watch his mind work. To watch the way everything he does has a purpose. When he has waited long enough, he takes his scalpel and makes a small incision in the center of the wound. He catches the blood that escapes in a cloth that he’s holding against her back. Once the incision is made, he takes a different tool that he has set out in front of him. With this tool, he dips back into the incision. He’s using his fingers to feel around the area while using the other tool to grab onto something that he must feel.
