Chapter 8
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart;
and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
* * *
Early Sunday morning, Sarah went out to hitch her buggy. She’d made sure it was all intact and working the previous afternoon.
“What are you doing?”
She swung around to see Joshua standing with his legs spread and hands on hips. His usual expression of disapproval was plastered on his face.
“I’m getting ready to go to the meeting.”
“It makes no sense for us to go separately. You’re coming with us. We’re coming back here when it’s finished, so it makes sense.”
There he was, telling her what to do again. “I’ll take my buggy; denke for the offer.”
“You’ll have to come with us.”
She frowned. “And why is that?”
“Your horse is lame.”
“He doesn’t look lame in the least to me.”
“Do you know anything about horses?”
He had her there. She didn’t know a lot about horses. Joel had always looked after that side of things. Now she wished she had learned something about them. “Nee, but he looks fine to me.”
He grumbled, “He’s old and he’s lame. He needs to be retired.”
Sarah swallowed hard, not wanting it to be true. Did that mean she had to find money to buy a new horse? “Are you certain he’s lame?”
“Jah, I am. I was telling Harold for some time that the horse was too old, but Harold rarely took him out. I mostly drove Harold everywhere.”
Sarah nodded. This was not what she had been told. When she was told she had a horse and a buggy, she had assumed they would all be in perfect working order. “Denke, I’ll go with you. I wouldn’t want to drive a lame horse.”
“It’s the only sensible thing to do. I’ll take you next week to look at another horse. There’s an auction on Tuesday.”
She shook her head. “I’ve no money at the moment.”
“You should have money. Monday is the last day of the month and that’s when you get your money for the month. There’ll be enough for you to live on, pay your bills and buy a buggy horse.”
“Really? That much money?”
“Jah. I helped Harold with his finances and did his banking for him when he couldn’t get out to do it himself. He’s kept money aside for a new horse.”
She heard her baby cry. “Do you need help hitching your buggy?”
“Benjamin and Holly always help me.”
“I’ll go and get Gretel.”
“Okay. We’ll be ready to go soon.”
Sarah hurried to get her baby. She’d already had everything she needed for Gretel packed in a bag by the door. She scooped Gretel up, took hold of the bag and headed out to the buggy. By the time she got outside, the children were helping their father.
“Gut mayrie, Mrs. Kurtz,” Benjamin said.
“Gut mayrie, Mrs. Kurtz,” Holly said after her brother.
“Good morning to both of you,” Sarah said.
“How is Gretel?” Benjamin asked.
“She had a good night and now she’s sleeping again.”
“Concentrate on what you’re doing,” their father said gruffly.
They turned their attention to hitching the buggy.
When they were ready, Sarah climbed up into the buggy next to Joshua and the children got into the back. She wondered how it was for them losing their mother when they were so young.
* * *
When they arrived at the house where the church was meeting, Joshua said, “You go on ahead. I’ll park the buggy.”
He let her and the children out.
“We’ll show you into the house,” Benjamin said.
“I’d like that, denke, since I don’t know anyone yet.”
The children took her to the people who owned the home, Mr. and Mrs. Wilson, before heading off to greet their friends. After she’d spoken with them for a few minutes, the Wilsons took her to meet the bishop.
“I’m sorry I haven’t been out to greet you. My fraa and I would like to visit you tomorrow if you’ll be home.”
“I’d like that. Jah, I’ll be home all day tomorrow.” As soon as she said that, she remembered she’d intended to go and buy some food. She could still do so if they came early. “Would you be coming in the morning?”
“Jah, if that’s better for you we could come at around nine.”
“That would be perfect.”
Sarah settled into a chair by the door, so if Gretel cried she would be able to take her outside easily without having to climb over people.
She looked around to see where Joshua was. Through the open front door, she spotted Joshua walking to the house with a woman either side of him. They were looking at him with adoration and both women seemed to be talking at the same time. The women had to be unmarried, and they appeared to be around twenty or not much older.
When both women took their seats inside, Sarah looked around the room. There had to be a lack of single men in the community if women were flocking around her grouchy neighbor. His face was handsome, she begrudgingly admitted. Even though he was attractive to look at, he was disagreeable.
Once the house was full of people, the service began. The bishop gave a sermon on brotherly love and how people should treat others how they would like people to treat them. They were fitting words that spoke to Sarah’s heart.
When the service was over, Sarah moved outside the house and the same two ladies she’d seen walking with Joshua hurried over to her and introduced themselves.
One was Sadie and one was Elizabeth.
“We heard that you’ve moved into Harold’s old place,” Sadie, the younger-looking of the two, said.
“That’s right. Harold was my onkel. I moved here only a couple of days ago.”
“Have you met many people yet?” Elizabeth asked.
“Only a few people.”
“Did you know Joshua before you arrived?” Elizabeth asked, while the other woman seemed eager to learn the answer as well.
“Nee. I only met him a couple of days ago when I got here.” She wanted to ask why they were so keen on him, but he could’ve been nice to them. Perhaps she’d been too abrupt with Joshua when they first met and that had set the negative tone.
“Joshua tells us that you’re a widow?”
“Jah, my husband died just a few months ago.”
Sadie stared at Gretel and her mouth turned down at the corners. “And you’ve got this small boppli.”
“Do you have any other kinner?” Elizabeth asked.
“Just the one.”
The women looked at each other as though they’d learned enough for now.
“Have both of you known Joshua for long?”
"I grew up here," said Sadie, "and Elizabeth moved here a while ago, after she visited our community for a wedding."
Sarah figured she might as well learn a thing or two from them. “Did you know Joshua’s fraa?”
“Jah, we did.”
“We knew Katherine.”
Elizabeth said, “Katherine was my first cousin.”
“It was a shock to everyone that she died so young,” Sadie said.
“Katherine was his fraa?” Sarah asked.
Sadie nodded. “It was a high fever that killed her.”
“What was wrong with her?”
“She had pneumonia. She wasn’t the only one who died from it that winter,” Elizabeth explained.
“I’m so sorry to hear that. It’s a dreadful loss for him and his two kinner.”
One of them leaned in. “They aren’t really his. Katherine was a widow and married Joshua when the kinner were three and four. She died soon after.”
“I never would’ve known. He treats them as though they’re his own.” That did explain why they were so lovely, though, while he was
crotchety.
“He’s a wunderbaar man,” Sadie said.
“He is,” Elizabeth agreed.
“Here you are, Sarah. I was looking for you.”
Sarah turned around to see Nellie.
The two girls made the excuse that they had to help with the food and hurried back to the house.
“I see you’ve met Sadie and Elizabeth.”
“Jah. I did.”
“I can guess what they were asking you about.”
Sarah frowned not wanting to betray the girls’ confidence or get drawn into gossip. “What do you think they were asking me?”
“About Joshua. It’s no secret that they’ve both got huge crushes on him.”
“Everyone knows?”
“Jah.”
“Speaking of Joshua, I didn’t know there was anyone actually living in the grossdaddi haus. When you mentioned him as being the neighbor, I thought you meant that he was living on the farm next door.”
“Ach, Nee, I'm sorry. I thought I mentioned it. He’s been living there for a good six months. He helped Harold with day-to-day living—paying bills and organizing his money. Seth and I helped with other things, and one of those things was his will and seeing that everything was just as he wanted.”
“It seems everyone’s got nothing but good things to say about Joshua.”
“Does that surprise you?”
“Nee, but he’s very forthright about things.”
“He’s had to be that way with everything that’s happened to him.”
“Jah, I heard about his wife dying and him hurting his back.”
“It’s just been one thing after another for poor Joshua.”
“He’s very kind, it seems. He’s offered to take me to a horse auction on Tuesday to choose a new horse.”
“He was always telling Harold he needed a new one, but Harold didn’t want to spend the money—it seemed.”
“Perhaps I shouldn’t. Although Joshua said that Harold had put money aside for one.”
“Did Joshua say you’d have enough money come end of month?”
“Jah, he did.”
“He’s the one who knows all about the finances of the farm. He helped Harold set it all up a couple of years ago. Before that, Harold had nothing, and Joshua encouraged him to set up the share farm and then Harold had money coming in.”
“Joshua did that?” Just then, Gretel woke and started squirming. Sarah picked her up and placed her against her shoulder and patted her on the back to calm her while Nellie talked.
“He’s helped so many people.”
“I had no idea.”
“Oh, he’d never tell you. He’s not like that. He can be a little overbearing, like he’s telling you what to do, but you just have to get used to him.”
Sarah gave a little giggle out of nervousness. She wanted to ask why she had to get used to the way Joshua was. It sounded like he was going to be at her farm for a rather long time. Remaining quiet about the matter was what she decided to do; otherwise, people would get the wrong impression of her. First impressions counted a great deal.
Gretel started crying.
“Is there somewhere I can feed her?”
“Yes, you can go into one of the upstairs bedrooms. Come with me and I’ll ask which one you can use.”
* * *
Sarah sat on the bed upstairs nursing her baby while she could hear nothing but buzz from half a dozen conversations happening below her. She was starting to get a more complete picture of Joshua. He was bossy and dominating because he’d had to take charge. He became both mother and father to the children when their mother died. And he seemed to make no distinction that they weren’t his children by birth. And he’d helped Harold develop an income by organizing the share farm on land that Harold wasn’t able to work alone given his advancing years.
It seemed that taking over was Joshua’s way. Sarah smiled as she remembered his face when she’d brought him the mug of coffee a couple of days ago. He'd thought she was out of her mind. He was very much a plain and practical person. Now it bothered Sarah that she’d spent the whole day thinking about why he was the way that he was.
“Your mudder’s going quite mad, Gretel.” Her baby kept right on feeding.
When Gretel was finished, she changed her diaper and went downstairs. The older people were leaving and the young people were staying on for the singing. Anxious that she’d made Joshua and the children wait for her, she looked around until she saw him and the children waiting by the buggy. She hurried over.
“I’m so sorry to keep you waiting. I was just feeding the baby and then she needed changing.”
“That’s okay. We’re not in a hurry.”
“Can I help with the boppli today when we get home?” Holly asked.
“I don’t know that there’s much to do today. I’ll be doing some washing tomorrow, but you’ll be at schul and she’s a little young to play with.”
“Don’t bother, Mrs. Kurtz.”
“Holly’s no bother, Mr. Byler." She looked down at Holly. "You can come and help later today if you’d like. I’m certain there’s something that you can do to help with Gretel.”
“Can I, Dat?” Holly looked up at her vadder.
“If Mrs. Kurtz says you can then it’s okay with me.”
"Denke, Dat," Holly said, "but don't I have chores at our house?"
“Sunday’s a day of rest. We don’t need to do anything today, Holly,” Joshua reminded her. “We should be going now. It looks like we’re going to get some rain and I’d like to get home before we do. Do you need help getting into the buggy?” Joshua asked Sarah.
“You can help with my bag.”
“Benjamin, take Mrs. Kurtz’s bag.”
Benjamin did as he was asked.
Sarah, with Gretel in her arms, climbed into the buggy. When she got comfortable, she looked up to see Sadie and Elizabeth looking at the buggy and whispering. She hoped she wasn’t going to become the subject of gossip. Everyone knew that they both lived on the same farm, so surely it had made sense to travel to the meeting together.
Chapter 9
I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress:
my God; in him will I trust.
Psalm 91:2
* * *
“You must feel comforted having Joshua living in the grossdaddi haus,” Mary said on Monday morning, teacup in hand as she sat next to her husband, Bishop Peter, in Sarah’s living room.
“I didn’t know he was going to be there. No one told me, and I opened his door to look around the day I got here and there he was.”
“He will look after the place.”
“How? Hasn’t he hurt his back?” Sarah asked.
“Jah, he did and now he can’t do what he used to do, but he still helps everyone who asks him. Soon he’s going to help someone with his old barn. The owner wants to tear it down and build a new one.”
“And it’s about time too. It was hit by lightening and half of it burned down and it’s been like that for months.”
“The old man is too old to fix it by himself. I told him the community will rebuild it, but he said he only needs a small barn. His idea is that his sons can help him knock it down and Joshua will give him ideas on what he’ll need to build a new one.”
“It sounds like Joshua is a valued member of the community.”
“He is, and he’s raising Katherine’s kinner as his own even though Katherine’s schweschder said she’d take them in.”
“I suppose it was a good thing he hurt his back because now he’s bought a business and he’ll be able to be there more for them. If he was still working construction, that would be a sunup to sundown job,” Bishop Peter explained.
“He takes over the business early next year?”
The bishop nodded. “That’s right.”
“It was a shock to everyone when Katherine died,” Mary said shaking her head with eyes cast downward.
“It must’ve been awful for him.”
She looked up at Sarah. “And you’d know a little about loss because you lost your husband young.”
“I did.”
“How did he die? If you don’t mind me asking.”
“I don’t mind. Joel died while he was traveling by bus. He’d lost his job and one of his cousins said Joel could work for him. It would’ve meant he’d have to live away for a few months at a time, but that was the only job he could get and with the baby coming and everything, we needed the money. He went by bus to see about the job and on his way back the bus crashed.”
“Gott must’ve wanted him home.” Bishop Peter smiled kindly at her.
“I didn’t, though. I wanted him to stay with me.”
The bishop’s gentle smile didn’t falter. “His ways are higher than ours and we aren’t to know why He calls someone home when He does.”
“I know. That’s what I keep telling myself, but sometimes I still wonder why…”
“You must trust, Sarah. Sometimes we’re pulled into trials before we know it.”
“Now you’re here in the community with us, and now you have a home that’s yours,” Mary said.
Sarah nodded. “The house came at the right time. I only had a month left to go on the lease and then I was going to have to move in with another family.”
“What you need is another husband. You’re young enough.”
Sarah smiled. “If that’s in Gott’s plan for me.”
“We’ve got many single menner in the community,” Mary said.
“Have you?”
“We’d have half a dozen, wouldn’t we?” Bishop Peter asked his wife.
“Jah, and a couple of widowers, not counting Joshua, because he’ll never marry again.”
“Why won’t he marry again? I thought he’d be looking for someone to help raise Benjamin and Holly.”
“He’s been on his own long enough. He must like it or something. I only say that because he’s had various opportunities and he’s passed them by.”
“Would you like another cup of tea?” Sarah asked.
Amish Widow's Christmas Page 4
