by Kate Stewart
“Don’t you miss it? The way we were? How hot it was?” she said, completely ignoring the baby in my arms.
“No, I’ve moved on. You should, too. I don’t want you coming here. It will only confuse him,” I said evenly, hoping to keep the conversation civil. She glared at Bryce, as if he was the reason for our separation, and then turned to walk toward the front door.
“He will always be the abortion I should have had.”
I saw red at her words. “If you ever come back here, I’ll have you arrested. You’ll be served with a restraining order, bet on it,” I said, hot on her heels as I followed her out.
“Don’t flatter yourself, Rhys. I won’t be back.”
I slammed the door on her back, eliciting an enraged scream as it hit her in the ass. Violet was right, the porch was cursed.
Fuck. Fuck. Why is she doing this?
I felt my phone vibrate.
VIOLET: I am sitting in the tub and could use a war story.
I had been telling her tales over the phone last night that I’d heard over the years of BDSM scenarios gone wrong. They seemed to fascinate her. She had laughed hysterically. I loved that sound.
RHYS: Now is a bad time.
VIOLET: Everything okay?
RHYS: Yes, just perfect. Enjoy your soak.
I was too angry to think about my response to her until later that day.
The more I thought about my behavior, the more I thought about her—Violet, not the evil bitch that showed up at my door. She was non-existent and I refused to entertain her. If she wanted me thinking about her, she’d failed.
My thoughts were of the woman who had captured me completely with her body first and then her words. I wanted to apologize to her but disliked the idea of doing it over the phone. She’d put up with much worse from me, but she didn’t deserve it this morning, or then for that matter. How the hell could I make it up to her if I couldn’t see her, touch her?
The image of the night I found her on that floor covered in blood flashed through my mind. I got her help text and made it to her house in fifteen minutes. I should have called the police, but I didn’t know where she was, so to be sure I went there first. The rest repeated on an endless, slow motion cycle when I thought about it. The door was open, the screen closed, and I immediately felt a heaviness in my chest I never knew was possible. I opened the door while dialing, afraid to touch her. There was so much blood. There was no way I would ever recover if she were dead. I knew then I would never be the same without her in my life. When I reached her, I knelt down, checking for a pulse. It was there, weak, but there. I scooped her up in my arms, applying pressure to the source of the blood escaping her neck.
She was alone in a house in Grand Cayman. Fuck.
If she only knew how that affected me every day she’d been gone, how worried I was about her safety, she wasn’t concerned about it in the least. Or, if she was, I couldn’t tell. I didn’t want to scare her by voicing mine. Then again, I had gotten into her house through an unlocked door the night I confronted her about her husband.
I’d never been anywhere close to doing anything like that with anyone else. I should have given her a chance to explain. Then maybe she wouldn’t be off on some island wondering where the hell my head was at and why I didn’t tell her what I should have a month ago.
The guilt I felt while she lay in that hospital bed consumed me. I wouldn’t fuck up like that again, not with her.
When I had laid Bryce down for the night, I called to apologize.
“I’m sorry. I had a bad morning.” I didn’t even let her finish her hello.
“I figured. What happened?” I could tell she was on edge. I’d probably done that to her. She didn’t deserve it.
“Can we not talk about it right now?”
“No secrets,” she reminded me.
“This isn’t a secret. We can call it a delayed conversation,” I gritted out.
“Nice. I can tell you are still angry. I wish I could serve you some ass to take it out on.” I could practically see the smile she was wearing and groaned in reply. Fuck, she was perfect.
“And this is why I couldn’t get anything done at work today.”
“Tell me about music,” she murmured, her voice putting me at ease.
“Music?”
“Yeah, tell me what you like.”
“I have a thing for good guitar solos,” I said, my mood evening out for the first time today. I climbed the stairs and checked on Bryce then went to my room to strip and bathe.
“Hmm, interesting,” she said, playing along.
“No, it’s not really,” I mused at her reach for small conversation. “I’m taking a bath. Why don’t you join me?”
“I took one today. I was in the tub when I texted you, remember?”
“Take another one,” I said suggestively.
“Okay.” I heard the rush of water as she readied her bath, and minutes later, we both sank into our tubs.
“Kind of a feminine habit you have here, Rhys.” She laughed and I joined her.
“Baths are relaxing. I don’t drink when I have Bryce, so this is what I do. Don’t hate on Daddy’s bath.”
“Not hating, just an observation. Don’t forget to sprinkle your salt.” She laughed again and I heard her water splash.
“Cute, really you are adorable. In my mind, I have blistered your ass about a hundred times since you left.” I knew I had her attention.
“Well then, I guess I’m thankful my ass is safe.” She sighed and I could picture her beautiful hazel eyes peering at me, mouth parted.
My bath was no longer relaxing.
“Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, Violet. I don’t like that you’ll be alone.”
“I have a chicken to cook,” she said, upbeat.
“I’m cooking my first turkey.” I laughed at the thought.
“What’s so funny?” she asked, her silky voice making it hard for me to concentrate on her question.
“Me, Bryce and a raw turkey. I can’t wait until you get a chance to know him. He is a twenty-eight pound Godzilla.
“Tell me more,” she said sweetly.
“What do you want to know?” I asked, rolling up a hand towel with one hand before sticking it behind my head.
“Everything,” she sighed.
“Before I brought him home from the hospital, I Googled everything and I mean everything. I watched a few videos to get the gist of it. There was a lot of trial and error. I had help from my family, but I’ve been pretty much alone the whole time. I thought it would be easier than it was. Feed him, clothe him, change him. I didn’t put much weight on sleeping schedules or an extra set of clothes just in case, or the croup or baby reflux.” I paused. “I really never thought I would be a dad. I’ve been pretty selfish with my freedom my whole life. I liked just worrying about me. And then I found out he was coming and I couldn’t handle the thought of not keeping him.”
Thinking about the lengths I had gone to be his father, I admitted the truth to her. “You know I had to beg for his life. I had to beg every day for her to keep him until it was too late and she had to carry full term.” I thought about my son and smiled. “He’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I really do love it, being a father. I’m not resentful I had to give up my freedom, because honestly, I realized I wasn’t too happy with it. Things changed for me so drastically, I didn’t even realize that I’d become a father and nothing else. You were the first thing I had for myself since he was born. I guess that’s why I waited to tell you; I was being selfish.” There was nothing but silence on her end of the phone.
“Violet?”
“Can I call you right back?”
“Sure, is everything—”
When I was done sobbing into my washcloth, I waited a few extra minutes to call him back to make sure my emotions stayed in check.
This woman, who he referred to so carefully, intrigued me. What kind of a woman wouldn’t want to have a family with Rhys? I was in no plac
e to judge and I had agreed to learn more, but I already knew I didn’t like her. And from what it looked like, she had abandoned them both.
I had to get a grip on these feelings. But in truth, when he spoke about his struggle and his love for his son, it left little room for doubt.
I shook those thoughts away and dialed him.
“Sorry, I had to use the restroom,” I said, the only decent excuse for my quick withdrawal. I was all for heavy conversation but I feared I couldn’t take much more, so I started where we left off on a light note.
“So tomorrow you and Bryce are going to cook a turkey?”
“I’m cooking one of four,” he said casually. “Thanksgiving is kind of ridiculous at my parents’.”
“Yeah, it will be the first one I’ve spent without mine, ever,” I said softly. “I wasn’t thinking about the holiday when I booked.”
“You do deserve to be there. You do deserve this break. Please tell me you are locking the house every time you go in and out?”
The worry in his voice gutted me. Fuck, I hadn’t thought about him having to worry about me, but I was touched that he was.
“I am, I promise. I actually carry mace with me everywhere. I get a little afraid sometimes, but it’s gated and I feel mostly safe here. I have a hard time some days. I’ll be honest, feeling safe was something I took for granted.”
“I’m sorry I brought it up,” he said, his voice low.
“No, I mean it’s valid. I’m in this big empty house, I didn’t think about how that would bother either of us. Honestly, I came to think about my next step, to get my shit together, but I kind of did that before I left. I’d stopped drinking as much, started working and working out,” I said, defeated. “I haven’t written one thing on my bucket list.” I sighed, getting out of the tub. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s beautiful here and I have a nice tan.”
“You ran away,” he stated firmly.
“I ran away,” I conceded. I was thankful when he let the subject drop.
“Tell me what you look like right now in the mirror.” His voice instantly put me on edge and made my pulse kick.
“Naked,” I said slowly. “You aren’t going to try to have phone sex with me, are you?”
“No, but if I was there right now...Fuck, the things I would do to that mouth and pussy.”
I was wet, so wet, and I’d already dried myself with a towel.
“Tell me one thing, please,” I said breathlessly, feeling my pulse pick up as I watched myself aroused in the mirror.
“I would open you up and lick you smoothly, but only once, from bottom to top with my whole tongue.”
My nipples peaked with that one sentence.
“Okay, a little more,” I begged.
“I would hesitate, because you would be so close to coming. I would work around your clit then plunge my tongue inside of you so you wanted it more...but you wouldn’t have time to ask because as soon as you opened wider for me, I would lick your tip so fast and then drive my fingers in, fucking you until you came hard, closing your legs around my neck. You do that, you know? You close your legs around my neck and squeeze when you come.”
“More?”
“No.” His voice was firm. “Tell me what you are doing.”
“Watching my body respond to you. Should I touch?”
“That’s for me to do. Come back. I’ll do it all in that exact order.” His voice was heated and hungry.
“I will. I just...I hate that house now, Rhys. It’s not a home anymore. It’s a graveyard of bad shit. I think I just figured that out. I’m going to sell it.”
“I’ll show you where home is.” His voice was ragged and I knew he was just as turned on as I was.
“Rhys, I need you inside me so much,” I breathed.
“Fuck, come home now,” he commanded, no longer playful.
“I am. I’m packing. I swore if I could write one thing on my bucket list, something worthy of doing before I die, then I would come home.”
“What will you write?”
“Go back to Savannah. I’ll call you with my flight info. No more unannounced visits.”
“Violet,” he paused.
“Yes,” I said, half packed and dying to get back to him.
“I’m in.”
I took a shuddering breath at his words as he paused. I wanted more, so I waited.
His voice was silky smooth as he spoke to me. “I know that’s what you are afraid of. I know why you ran. I should have told you about Bryce, but I wasn’t as sure then as I am now. I know this is all really soon and I know you will barely be divorced, but this is something we both know is worth taking the risk for. There’s no question of what’s going on here. Come back, come fall in love with my son like you want to. He will love you back. There are two men here that could really use you around.”
I sank to the bed next to my open suitcase. “I couldn’t handle falling in love and pushed aside like that again. I don’t think I can go through it again. And with you—with you, Rhys—I know how much it would hurt,” I admitted.
“I’m in.” Those two words were all I needed.
“Okay,” I said hoarsely.
“Okay.”
I hung up with him then called the airlines. I was scheduled to fly out first thing Friday morning, unable to get an earlier flight due to the holiday.
I quickly texted Rhys my flight info and told him I would be at his house by noon on Friday. I couldn’t handle hearing his voice any more tonight and not being with him. I went to sleep dreaming of two sets of gray eyes that held my heart.
RHYS: I burned my fucking turkey. How is that even possible? Don’t these things have to cook for hours?
VIOLET: I’m sorry. I just pissed in my bikini laughing at you. I’ll have to get back to you on that one.
RHYS: It’s only noon and this day is a disaster.
VIOLET: If it makes you feel better, I forgot to thaw my chicken and have to eat a frozen burrito.
RHYS: No, it doesn’t. It makes me sad. There are three other turkeys left for us. I’ll save you some. We can have a picnic in bed.
VIOLET: A picnic in bed sounds kind of romantic.
RHYS: I can be romantic. I can do one even better. I heard a song while I was cooking and thought of you.
VIOLET: Really? You have a song for me?
RHYS: Yeah, with a kick ass guitar solo.
VIOLET: Uh huh. Send me the link.
RHYS: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFAcjKnak1M
Oh God, I was pretty picky with my music. I sat staring at the link, wondering what kind of music he could possibly be thinking of me to. I bit the bullet and clicked the link and damn near had a heart attack on the beach.
The man was a fucking miracle.
It was Thanksgiving and I couldn’t get to him fast enough. Halloween—aka my birthday—had sucked as well. Christmas better damn well be good to me. After another day of sunbathing, I took to my favorite chair on the back deck and called my mother.
“Hi, Mom. Happy Thanksgiving,” I said, hoping she didn’t hear the sadness in my voice.
“Baby girl, I sure hope you are relaxing and enjoying yourself.”
“I am. It’s beautiful here, Mom,” I noted, staring at the ocean as the waves rolled in and the sun blazed in the background, making it’s descent.
“Good girl. Have you talked to Rhys?”
“Every day for hours. Mom, he’s wonderful, like a truly amazing person.” I felt my voice shake. Why the hell was I getting emotional?
“He is,” she agreed, waiting for more.
“He has a son. A baby named—”
“Bryce, I know, honey. He told me in the hospital. He showed me a picture. He’s got to be the most beautiful baby I’ve ever seen, aside from you, of course.”
“Wait,” I interrupted, “you knew about his son?” My whole body came alive in a jolt as she confessed to me.
“Yes, he told me he hadn’t introduced you yet but would remedy that
when you got home in one piece. That man is in love with you, Violet. I got to know him pretty well. It can happen when two people are worried sick and stuck in the same room together for hours.”
He’d told my mom, which meant he had every intention of telling me. My heart filled then burst.
“Mom, remember when you told me I didn’t need a man for anything?” The quiver in my voice returned, along with a burn in my throat.
“Of course.”
“I think I need him,” I said, wiping tears from my face. “That’s why I’m here. I can’t stop needing him.”
“Oh, baby, you are in love with him. You want him. But if you had to do it alone again, could you?”
“Yes…no…I don’t know. When it comes to him, he’s got me pretty good,” I said, burying my head in my free hand and trying desperately not to fall apart on the phone with her. She would only worry, when the truth was they were tears of relief.
“You are coming home early, aren’t you?” She was smiling. I could tell.
“Yes, Mom.”
“See you soon.”
VIOLET: I’ll be at your house in twenty minutes.
RHYS: Jesus, did you just send me another picture of you half-naked on the beach?
VIOLET: I took it yesterday.
I got no response.
My heart was pounding out of my chest. The entire plane ride all I could do was think about his smile, his laugh, his kiss, his touch. I knew so much more about him, and yet it seemed like useless details compared to...simply...the way we felt. When he and I were together the world fell away and I knew for certain this—this, what I was feeling right now—was the way you were supposed to feel when you fell in love. I pitied the previous me who had lived so long without it.
I all but ran through the airport, dragging my luggage like it was a nuisance. I couldn’t remember ever wanting someone this bad. I had proven to myself that I was capable of being alone the last year of being married to Alex.
Now the truth of it was, life was just much fucking better with Rhys.
