Lust & Lies Box Set-Sexual Awakenings, Excess, Predator & Prey

by Kate Stewart

  Until I saw her, touched her, felt the warmth of her light, the deliverance of her eyes in the way she looked at me.

  In the States, I had attempted to live a life with a woman who moved me toward something better, something more than the life of a man without a conscience. More than the shadow of the man he once was, who became what he despised most.

  But she extinguished that light.

  And now I dwelled in darkness.

  “Taylor.” Cedric strode through my condo with authority past the officers who were leaving. “What the fuck happened?”

  I nodded toward Joseph, who slept on my chest, and walked into Amber’s bedroom and laid him in his crib.

  When I closed the door behind me, I walked Cedric out to the patio. “They shot Amber.”

  “What!?”

  “They shot Amber. I need you to take the baby. I have to end this.”

  I moved toward my bedroom, leaving Cedric temporarily stunned on the porch, and paused at my bedroom door when I saw my sister’s blood. Cedric was behind me an instant later.

  “Taylor—” he gripped my wrist gently “—talk to me, start from the beginning.”

  My thoughts raced as I looked back at him. “They must have thought it was me.”

  “They who?”

  “That’s what I’m going to find out.” I unpacked the bag I was working on before I got into the shower and began cramming in street clothes. “Do you know the temperature in Barga in August?”

  “Barga?” Cedric looked at me incredulously. “Fucking Italy? You think he did this?”

  I shoved another T-shirt in my bag. “I have to get away from them.” I pointed in the direction of Amber’s room. “I have to. Move her out of here, Cedric, until you know she’s safe.” My heart cracked. “If she survives, keep her with you. Okay? Just get the baby and go.”

  “Wait a fucking minute.” Cedric gripped my arm and spun me to face him. “You aren’t going after him.”

  “That bullet was meant for me.”

  His eyes penetrated mine. “Fine, so it was meant for you. We’ll up security.”

  “No.” I shook my head. “No locked boxes. I didn’t come this fucking far to look over my shoulder. And you met him, Cedric. Do you really think that would work?”

  Cedric took a step back and crossed his arms. “So, what? You’re going on a suicide mission?”

  “If I’m there, they aren’t looking for me here. I’ll make some noise. It will keep her safe.”

  “Do you hear what you are saying? No fucking way.” Cedric pushed my bag off the bed.

  I picked it up and faced him head on. “I did this. I brought him into our lives. I did this, and I don’t give a fuck what happens to me.”

  “That’s your broken heart talking.”

  I deadpanned, “Fuck you.”

  “No, Taylor. Fuck you if you think I’m going to let you walk out of this house, abandon your sister and that baby when he needs you the most.”

  “That’s your broken heart talking,” I snapped as his jaw twitched. “I know you love me. But I also know you see my logic. You just don’t want to deal with the consequences.”

  “Yeah, Taylor, goddamnit, I love you, always have, and there’s no way I’m letting you go without me.”

  He towered over me, forcing my eyes to his. “I can’t let you go.”

  “You don’t have a choice. I need you to stay here and take care of them. Jesus, Cedric, they are a step ahead at every turn. Amber is my benefactor. I changed it weeks ago.” I looked up at him. “You’re next in line. You’ll have my money, my resources to do right by me. Take care of them.”

  Cedric shook his head. “Sorry, ain’t happening.”

  “The last man who cornered me got a hole shot through his leg.”

  His lips twitched as he stared down at me. “You threatening to shoot me, Taylor?”

  “If I have to.”

  “He didn’t do this.”

  “You don’t even know his fucking name. What does that tell you?” I studied him. “Maybe you like him a little more than you let on.”

  “Hardly. We moved a body together. That hardly constitutes ‘bros before hoes’ bonding. He’s a fucking trained killer, Taylor.”

  “Start talking.”

  I moved around my room, packing everything I could find that didn’t pair with heels.

  “He ex-army special ops turned rogue. My guess is he’s a contract killer. Mercenary.”

  I shrugged. “Your guess? You know shit.”

  “I know he wouldn’t fucking shoot you.” Cedric ripped up the bed sheets I hadn’t realized I was staring at and threw them into a ball to cover the dark stain that lay underneath.

  “Well then, maybe he can tell me who would.” The thought of Daniello being the one to pull the trigger was too much to process.

  “Ah, but you would fight to your death, Taylor.”

  “Goddamned right I would.”

  “The alarm was disarmed. It was him or one of his.”

  “Fuck this. I’m not doing this shit for you. I can’t sign off on this. You’ll have to find someone else. I can’t let you do this, Taylor.”

  “Then I’ll find someone else.” I gripped my bag in an attempt to move past him but grabbed my arm. I could feel his desperation. He peered down at me, his eyes begging mine. “Give me time to assemble some men.”

  I huffed out a laugh. “This isn’t Dyer.”

  “So then you know you won’t survive it!”

  “Amber is lying in the goddamned hospital, and it’s my fault!”

  Cedric crossed his arms. “Then you should be with her.”

  “You’re done protecting me, Cedric. I’ve asked too much. Just take care of them. Joseph is in my custody. If she survives, she could lose him all over again. I fucked everything up. Just let me try to figure out a way to keep them safe.”

  “By dying?”

  “Maybe. Maybe my momma was right. Maybe I’ll go out in a spray of bullets. It’s so fucking ironic.”

  “Goddamn it.” Cedric sat at the edge of my bare bed and looked up to me with unshed tears in his eyes. “I’m fucking begging you. Don’t do this.”

  “She’s got a chance to live the life I always wanted her to have.”

  Cedric stood and moved toward me with a set jaw. He didn’t stop until I was wrapped in the strength of him. His lips covered mine before he invaded my mouth and kissed me thoroughly. Feeling his need, I pushed out a surprised breath as he tasted and teased until I was breathless.

  When he pulled away, he peered down at me with angry eyes. “If you make it back, I’ll never forgive you for this shit.”

  Still enveloped in his steely arms, I wrapped my own around him. “I can live with that.”

  He whispered into my temple, “I’ll send you a care package. You aren’t going in without a few old friends.”

  I smiled with my head on his chest. “I’m counting on it.”

  “Find him first.”

  I let out a breath. “I’m pretty sure he’ll find me.”

  “Excuse me, let us through.” I jerked out of my stupor as they wheeled Amber back into her hospital room. I must have fallen asleep because the room was filled with fresh daylight.

  “How is she?”

  One of the nurses at her side glanced my way. “I’ll have the doctor come and update you.” They had to rush her into a second surgery when I arrived at the hospital. I couldn’t find it in me to skip town without saying goodbye, without knowing.

  And knowing was so much fucking worse.

  Her body had begun dumping acid, and her lungs had collapsed. A gut shot brought on the worst imaginable pain. Someone had intended for me to suffer. Amber lay lifeless, attached to several machines, her porcelain face swollen from her struggle. I gripped her cold hand as she fought for her life, the way she had since she was a child. Remembering the little girl I had comforted after long, exhausting nights of cleaning. The sweet child who curled up next to me in bed,
who smelled of bleach, and cried silently after a day of relentless torture at the hands of her mother. And the day I left her to fend for herself in a world she was defenseless against.

  “Here, Aylor.” Amber handed me a macaroni plate she’d made at school, and I studied it. The macaroni was dyed green and glued to a hand drawn brown tree trunk. Amber’s leaves were sloppily placed, but I knew she had tried her hardest. There was a note attached that read: To my mommy. Thank you for helping me grow.

  I handed the plate back to her. “Amber, this is for Momma.”

  Amber looked behind us to make sure our conversation wasn’t heard before she whispered, “You are my momma.”

  I cupped my mouth as I sobbed out my apology. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, Amber. Please don’t leave me.”

  Amber lay limp, machines doing her breathing for her as I begged her forgiveness. “Fight, baby, fight so hard. I know you can do this. You’ve come so far. I love you,” I sobbed, unable to control it as the pain seared through my chest. “Please don’t go.”

  “Ms. Ellison.”

  Wiping my face with the back of my hand, I met the eyes of her doctor. “Yes?”

  He glanced at Amber and then to me, no doubt comparing our similarities.

  “Your sister is still critical. Abdominal trauma is tricky, and post-op is dangerous due to the high risk of infection and other complications. We will have to wait it out. For now, we have her under for pain and to keep her as stable as possible. I’ll keep you updated.”

  “Thank you.”

  I walked back over and gripped my sister’s hand. “You can do this, Amber. Fight. Just one more time, fight hard.” I kissed her temple as I took one last look at her. When I moved to leave, I noticed Aaron standing at the door with Nina behind him.

  I was sure Cedric had updated them both. Aaron looked destroyed as he walked into the room.

  I spoke to him as he passed me. “Tell them she’s your fiancée, that’s the only way they’ll let you stay in here.” Aaron nodded, his cloudy eyes on my sister. He looked over to me, brimming with tears. “Is she going to live?”

  I bit my lips together in an attempt to tamp down my emotion as Nina moved to my side. “They don’t know. She’s critical. The doctor said it’s a waiting game.”

  Aaron questioned me with an anger-etched face, “Who did this? Who in the hell would do this to her? Don’t they know what’s she been through?! Don’t they fucking know what she lived through!?”

  He didn’t bother waiting for an answer as he sat in the chair next to her and gripped the hand I had just let go of.

  Amber had told him everything. She’d only been dating him for a month, and she’d opened up about her life in Dyer and her addiction to a man she barely knew. At that moment, my sister was the bravest woman I’d ever known. I’d been such a coward, afraid of anyone finding out my truths. But it didn’t matter. Those who loved you didn’t care about your past or your skeletons. They embraced them.

  As Daniello had embraced mine.

  How could he let this happen?

  “Was it him?” I’d almost forgotten Nina, who stood at my side watching her brother shatter.

  “I honestly don’t know. I can’t live with it if it was.” And that was the truth, but nothing had kept him from ending me in that penthouse the night he left. It would have been the perfect opportunity. “I think it was one of his associates. I have to find him. I have to know either way.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  I looked at my sister on the hospital bed, with the man who could have been her future falling apart next to her. I turned to Nina as the anger began to seep in. “Bring a little Tennessee dirt to his doorstep and end things badly.”

  “Taylor—”

  I continued to retreat down the hall with purposeful steps. “We talked about this, Nina. I can’t come back to Solutions. I’m so sorry.”

  “We’ll be here.” Her voice shook as I turned on her. Her eyes were murky as she studied me carefully.

  “Twelve years I spent trying to be something better, to live better. And I’m not even sure who it was for anymore.”

  She shook her head. “That’s not true, Taylor. You’re confused. You’re scared.”

  I shrugged in front of the elevator. “Am I? Or did I know exactly what would happen?”

  Nina gripped my hand. “Does Cedric know?”

  I nodded. “Everything. He has Joseph.”

  She held my hand tightly as her chest stuttered with heavy breaths. She feared for me.

  “Taylor, just come back, okay?”

  I let go of her hand and pulled her to me. We held each other tightly as I let a lone tear slip down my cheek. I whispered to her, “At least I know now exactly who I’m doing it for.”

  “Taylor—”

  “Marry Devin. No one will ever love you more than that man.”

  She laughed. “You used to hate him.”

  “People can change.”

  “True,” she agreed. “Case in point, you’re hugging me. I want you to know, you saved me.” She pulled away, her tears still falling.

  I shook off her statement. “I know I have no right to ask, but—”

  “You don’t have to.”

  “If Amber doesn’t make it—”

  “She will. She has to, my brother is in love with her.”

  The elevator opened, and I stepped in. Nina gripped the top of her arms as her face fell.

  “Bye, Nina.”

  “You look beautiful,” Ray said as he slipped the corsage onto my wrist.

  “This is ridiculous,” I said as I fidgeted on the three-inch heels I’d been forced to walk in for the last month. “I don’t want to go.”

  “It’s your one and only prom, kitten. You deserve a break. Live like a teenager for once.”

  “I think we both know I’m way past that.”

  A hint of a smirk traced his full lips. “Still, you need a little more personality.” I studied the claw marks I’d left on his arm the night before, hence my nickname. “I think we both know that’s coming along nicely.”

  Ray gave me his first real smile in weeks. He’d been more absent than present, but we more than made up for it when the time came. He’d fulfilled every promise he’d made to me. I was expertly trained on corporate etiquette, not to mention I’d surpassed his expectations, landing first in class at school.

  “You really do look beautiful.”

  I rolled my eyes as the driver knocked on the door.

  “This will be humiliating. How many times do I have to tell you I can’t stand my classmates?”

  Ray’s jaw tensed. “You will walk into that room and own the fucking thing. Make eye contact with every person who looks your way. Within five minutes of being there, someone will ask you to dance. Accept the invitation.”

  “Why?” He pulled and unboxed a solitaire diamond necklace from his pocket then slipped it around my neck.

  “Practice.”

  “So this is another drill? And should I spread my legs to some pompous jock prick to keep the illusion alive?”

  Ray didn’t flinch. “Up to you.”

  I studied his beautifully chiseled face as he looked me over. “Why don’t you care about me?”

  Ray looked down at me with haunted eyes. “Told you. My heart is no good.”

  “I don’t believe you.”

  “Nine months in this house and you still think there is hope for us, Taylor? Don’t be ignorant.”

  “Ray.” I held his arm as he fastened the clasp. Then he pulled away from me. His eyes briefly flicked to mine before they ran down my body. “Worth every penny.”

  My blood instantly boiled. “Fuck you.”

  Another smile, this one far less kind. He was insanely handsome and grew more so by the day. I gripped the back of his head with my nails and pulled him closer.

  “Let me skip this.” His eyes dropped to my lips. “I’ll make it worth your while.”

  He palmed
my hands with his own and pulled them away.

  “Have a good time, kitten.”

  I moved to the door and looked back to him. “What if I loved you?”

  He flinched as he stood at the bottom of the stairs, his hand on the railing, his eyes on the ascending marble steps above. “Well, that would be utterly stupid.”

  I bit my tongue and slammed the door behind me.

  I did exactly what I was told. I owned that fucking room. I’d even danced with a couple of guys who eye-fucked me daily in some of my classes. But it didn’t last long. Inside the limo on the way back to the castle mere hours after I arrived at my senior prom, I let a few tears fall. Ray was decidedly cold. I knew enough to realize it was against his nature. He didn’t want our relationship at first, but he was as equally involved.

  It was impossible he felt nothing for me.

  Impossible.

  Even with the distance he put between us, something was there. He never strayed far from home for more than a few days. There were no other women. And he fed on me like an addiction.

  Pissed off and anxious to finish our conversation, I hit the top of the stairs, prepared for war. I entered his bedroom, and when I saw he wasn’t there, I moved to find him in his office when I heard his cough.

  “Nice and easy,” Olivia’s voice sounded from his bathroom. I moved toward his en suite, my heels silent on the carpet, and saw Ray sitting on his toilet seat with an oxygen mask on his face. Olivia spoke in a soothing tone as she pressed the end of a stethoscope to his chest.

  “What happened?!”

  Ray looked up, and his eyes narrowed. “Get out.” It was weak.

  I ignored his order and rushed forward just as he jutted his foot out and kicked the door closed.

  “Lock it,” I heard him tell Olivia.

  “Please, just tell me what’s going on!”

  “Fuck off, kitten.”

  Angry tears burned my cheeks as I sat on the other side of the door. “I hate you!”

  The plane touched down in Florence and jolted me awake. I discarded the onset of fear of what lay ahead and made my way to the rental counter to secure a car. I’d gotten the loudest car imaginable: a canary yellow hatchback with a navigation system. I wasn’t there to hide.