by Rue Volley
We pulled back up to the house and we all got out not saying a word. Josh and Sam headed for the door.
“What the hell happened in there Rue?” Kai said.
I just looked at him.
“I messed up Kai, really bad… I just wanted to see Mom so bad.”
Kai looked at me, I guess the look on my face didn't warrant any sarcasm.
“Did you see her Rue?” he asked.
“I… I thought I did but it wasn't real, she wasn't there Kai.”
“What did you see?”
I wanted to say, but for now I thought it would be best not to.
“No one... I saw no one Kai.”
******
There have been a few times I've felt like a tool. Today was my biggest tool day ever. I had hurt the one boy I cared about. Maybe I even loved him, I don't know. I got all emotional and ended up putting the only two people in the world who gave a damn about my family, in serious danger. I knew Sam didn't feed on other people, even though Josh was a protector just like us, I am sure she would of never considered doing it, if she wasn't about to die. God, I couldn't even begin to start to apologize to either one of them. I just couldn't. The look on Josh"s face in that hallway, the way he looked at me, I was sure he hated me now and maybe Sam did too. I hoped they wouldn't leave us here to fend for ourselves. I didn't think they would, but I couldn't be sure. I kept thinking about my mom and dad. Sam knew where my dad was, she claimed he was safe, supposed to make me feel better I guess. My mom though, was missing in action and after seeing the last place she had been, I couldn't even begin to guess...
then I remembered Caine in the doorway. Oh god…he has my mom. I started to cry, just sobbed really, the kind of cry that takes your breath away. I leaned down and put my head between my knees… I felt a panic attack coming on.
“Hey.”
I looked up and Josh was standing in my doorway.
I leaned up and ran my sleeve across my face, still sucking in a little air.
Josh came in and sat down next to me, on my bed.
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I just kept my eyes down, truth was, I didn't want to look at him.
“Listen Rue...what happened today, well...it's not your fault.”
I blew out some air... “Yea, right.”
He reached over to me and placed his hand on my hand.
“You were drawn there... We should have kept you with us… I knew it.”
“Drawn there?” I asked.
“Yea...you were. You would have gone there one way or the other, no one could change it, just delay it.”
“Why...why would I get drawn there?”
“It was just saturated with energy...bad stuff you know?”
“From my mom?”
“NO...no, listen Rue, Caine is different, ya know? He obviously has an interest in your family.”
“Why do you think he...” Josh interrupted me.
“Well, we don't know yet… We will figure it out though…together.”
I looked down at my hands.
“I don't know why either one of you want to stay here...? I almost got Sam killed today!”
Josh reached up to my face and turned my face to look him in the eye.
“You did not... We are warriors Rue, we've handled ourselves before, I won't let anything happen to Sam…or Kai...or you.”
We sat there for a moment, kinda stuck in the moment. Josh started to lean towards me and I wanted him too. I needed something to soften the day, to make everything better. He had just barely brushed his lips to mine and we heard a voice coming our way.
“Hey Josh!”
Josh dropped his hand from my face and stood up. Kai appeared at the door.
“Hey dude wanna kill some zombies with me?”
Josh looked back at me.
“Yea...sure I'm coming.”
He walked to the doorway and turned back to me.
“I meant it Rue… I'll die before I allow you too.”
I just stared at him, he smiled and headed downstairs.
I should go to bed...it getting late, but I am a masochist. I walked downstairs, with every intention of confronting Sam. Josh received his apology, she needed her's to, well, minus the romance.
Josh and Kai were blasting zombies out of exsistence and for a moment, I wished it would be that easy… Are zombies real too...? Hope not, bet they stink bad. I smiled to my self at that thought and stood there at the bottom of the steps for a moment.
“Josh, where's Sam?”
Josh turned back to me.
“Shouldn't you get to bed?” he asked me.
I laughed.
“Kai's sitting right next to you...tell him to go to bed too.”
He looked away from me... “She's on the porch.”
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I walked past them, thinking why tell me to go to bed? Kai can stay up to whatever, but I need to sleep… Haha, now that we had a kiss and tell and I knew he didn't hate me… I planned to take advantage of it.
I stepped outside, the moon was full, big surprise. Sam was standing there leaning against the wall.
“Hey Sam.”
She looked at me, I swear her eyes looked as if she had been crying, but I wasn't going to go there with her.
“Hey,” she said.
“Listen… I wanted to, ya know…say I'm sorry for that thing today.”
“Wasn't your fault.”
“Josh said that too, but I think...I just had to say it anyway.”
“I appreciate it Rue… I do.”
“Sooo...Sam listen, what was that thing in the car…? Ya know, your hand on his side thing?”
Sam pulled in here breath and let it out slow.
“Wouldn't you rather Josh just share that with you…ya know…”
Sam held her hand out and did spirit fingers.
I smiled and looked down.
“Believe it or not, no…I'd rather you just tell me, if you don't mind.”
Sam smiled at me..
“Well...Josh let me feed…on him. I was close to death, takes a lot to come back from that. Feeding is not a pretty business, not when it's done like that. He umm…he really put himself in danger for me to come back from that.” She looked at me… “You see when I did that…well, when we feed, organs suffer, the heart would be better, death is quicker that way, glad it didn't for him.”
“He could have died, like instantly?”
Sam kept her eyes locked with mine.
“I had no focus when I fed, yea... Could of went that way...but it didn't, his kidney took the brunt of it, that's why his side was blacked, it was death setting in. I had to find it and heal him, or he would have been dead within the hour.”
“Oh god, Sam…”
“Listen Rue, it didn't go that way, so stop beating yourself up about it.”
“Me and guilt are kinda BFF's these days.”
She started to laugh...
“Rue, listen…you should get some sleep. You really need some, you've got dark circles under your eyes. You should eat something too, something high in carbs.”
I looked out to the woods, then back to her.
“Yea your probably right.”
“Really, no fight?” she asked me.
We both laughed.
“No more fighting today Sam, I promise.”
“I'm going to put a binding on the house, Josh and I have to go out... to feed, we both need energy.”
I looked at her kinda funny.
“On people?”
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She grinned...
“No...we are going into the woods Rue...”
She said it like she was a little offended.
“Sorry I... I didn't know, I should of thought it and not said it.”
“Don't be sorry...being blunt is a gift Rue, don't change it.”
I grabbed an apple, well...two of them and ran upstairs. I ate them like I had not eaten in years. I laid down on my bed...as I started to drift off, I swear I could see
a shimmer climb up my wall and I knew the binding spell had been cast... I couldn't help but wonder what they would feed on, but honestly I was just glad they were still alive to do it... I really was.
******
I woke up. I swear for the first thirty seconds everything seems normal.
That's my favorite, when you don't realize anything is wrong, you just stretch and then things start creeping in...all the stuff and things...things and stuff. I jumped in the shower and got ready for school... What else could I do? I ran downstairs and Kai and Josh were sitting at the table sucking down breakfast. Josh looked better, not quite 100% but closer to it then the day before. I got caught staring at him, for a moment, and he turned to look at me… A smile, more like a grin came over his face. Don't look at me like that...I was just vulnerable yesterday, right?
He had to know that, hope he did anyway. I felt one step away from cheater... I really did.
“Ready?” he asked.
I looked at him.
“Your going again today?” I said.
“Yep.”
He went back to shoving food in his mouth.
“Don't you think you should rest or something…?” I asked him.
“Nope…going with you.”
I just knew he wouldn't change his mind, so I just shrugged my shoulders, can't fight his stubborn nature. Probably irritated me because it was so close to my own.
“Okay...well we gotta go then,” I said.
I grabbed my bag and headed out the door.
They all followed, I was sitting in the back seat when they all started to pile in. Josh got in next to me so Kai was stoked to take shotgun. Sam looked back to him and he smiled at her, she grumbled but accepted it...guess none of us felt like fighting at all.
We all got out and Josh leaned into Sam"s side.
“Be careful today okay?”
“Always do...listen you just…ya know, don't exert yourself,” she said as she glanced at his side.
Josh started laughing...
“What on the schoolyard?” he asked her.
She just smiled and pulled away.
98
I had nothing but finals today…awesome. Hopefully, I could remember what the hell it was I was trying to pass. It went fine anyway, I guess I just retain information, thank god. Josh sat right along with me, blazing through everything. I can't imagine how much he actually knew…that both him and Sam knew. School was probably just a joke to them. I caught Josh staring at me periodically, throughout the morning. I quickly looked away each time. He was very pretty...
too pretty but I kept thinking about Johnathan and the “I'm sorry” I owed him... I hadn't seen him yet, so the butterflies in my stomach just continued to get worse and worse.
Lunchtime...maybe we'd have a repeat…but still I hadn't spotted him. I happened to see Sophie hanging out in her usual circle and I approached them...
something I would have never done, not because I was scared to, but because I just never did before.
“Hey...Sophie,” I said.
Everyone sitting with her looked at me, like I was a foreign object.
She smiled at me, “Hey Rue.”
“So...is a…Johnathan at school today…? I haven't seen him around.”
“No…he ummm, he said he wasn't feeling good. I think he's just skipping out.
Honestly, there's no reason he should come here anyway, my mom just wanted to try to make him suffer this week, ya know?”
“Sick?” I said, as I gripped my backpack.
“Yea, he did look crappy this morning, like he had the life sucked out of him.”
“Sucked out?” I said. I really need to stop sounding like a parrot.
“Well, it's just a way of describing it,” she laughed. “Think his stomach was giving him trouble.”
I looked down at my hands and I started to get so mad... Josh wouldn't of, would he…? Oh shit.
“Oh...okay, well...tell him I hope he feels better, k?”
“Sure Rue.”
Everyone surrounding her had lost interest in me two words into our conversation, so no other “See ya laters” were necessary. Besides, I had a certain boy I needed to talk to a.s.a.p.
Josh was sitting at the table across the yard and as I walked towards him, he just grinned at me.
“Ummm, hey...you and Sam went out last night…” I leaned in and whispered, “To feed?”
“Yea... sure did,” Josh said.
I sat down and stared him right in the eye.
“Didn't take a detour did ya?” I asked him as I leaned in.
“I don't know what you mean Rue.”
“You didn't go...ummm…to see Johnathan did you?”
He stopped eating.
“What?”
“Sophie said he looked like he had the life sucked out of him this morning... He's sick ya know?”
99
“You've gotta be kidding me. You think I...what…? Went to your boyfriend"s house and made out with him, suck style?”
“Well, we umm, ya know...and you and Sam went out...and now he's not here, supposedly sick or something Josh.”
“Your something special, ya know?”
He stood up… I thought he was about to start yelling at me, but instead he got this wicked grin on his face. He looked around at all the people in the yard.
“Who's a dick here?” he asked me.
“What?” I said.
“Who sucks out here…ya know, pissed you off…or just all around is shitty to everyone?”
“I…I don't know… I guess jocks...that group over there… They mess with people for sport,” I said.
“K.”
He set his O.J. down on the table and winked at me. I was confused.
He walked over to them and started to say something to them. I couldn't hear them but by the looks on their faces, they were not happy with whatever he said. The biggest one stepped up to him and Josh squared his shoulders, setting his feet apart. The boy took a swing at him and Josh moved out of the way in a blur, he came around behind him and rubbed his back with his whole body, like a kitty. I stood up, only able to think what the hell? I could hear the boy yell.
“What the hell dude?” the big jock yelled at Josh. Suddenly, the jock kinda stumbled back and puked.
Josh put his hand on the side of his head and the jock smiled at him...
Then Josh quickly touched them all and it was like they never had a fight at all. In fact, they all started laughing, as if they were old friends and Josh had just told the funniest joke ever. He came walking back over to me. He sat down in front of me.
“There,” he said.
“I don't even know what...”
“I fed on him, he'll probably have a headache for about fifteen minutes, but after that…nothing.”
“Why...why would you do that?” I whispered.
“You pissed me off,” Josh said, as he grinned.
“I got pissed… I'm not exactly full throttle here...your fault,” he added.
“So you just rub on some guy like a kitty? That's gross Josh.”
He started to laugh...
“Hey, you said they were dicks.”
“Yea, I said they were dicks, but I did not say go suck on them like human popsicles.”
“If I were you, I'd be nice or I will spent the rest of the day sending people to the nurse.”
“I don't understand you... One minute you”re all caring about humans and the next you do something like that,” I said as I rolled my eyes.
He looked at me and the corner of his mouth pulled up into a grin.
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“I'm gonna go stand in the doorway so when the bell rings, everyone can bump into me.”
“I swear to god Josh...knock it off...! I'll be nice to you okay?”
We both stood up and started heading inside.
“Can I put my arm around you?” he asked me.
I looked at him.
“No.”
“Hold
your hand?”
“Absolutely not!” I yelled.
He was laughing at this point.
“Wanna go make out under the bleachers?”
“Shut up Josh...you are pushing your luck.”
The bell rang and we went to lit class.
******
I sat in lit daydreaming about the day before...“I love her,” kept playing back in my head. God, I had screwed up royal. Guys are not so free about giving that away and the longer the day went, the more I thought about Johnathan being so open, so sweet in his declaration to me. Maybe he was sick, maybe he wasn't. I believed Josh. I don't know why I thought he'd pull some macho move and go and do the nasty on him. I laughed under my breath, at the thought of it. I jumped to conclusions...shouldn't have. Josh was probably in a vulnerable position too, in my room…I mean he almost lost Sam. That had to be the reason right? The last thing any of us needed, at this point, was more. There was enough. Normally things happened in threes or so they say, but I was on like what, ten or something...? Somebody owes me a do-over. I had been doodling on my paper and I looked over to Josh, I caught him just looking at me.
Awesome... I looked back down, blushing a little, the look on his face was... Well, just ya know, I didn't know what he was thinking, but I really didn't want to know.
It's weird now. I liked it when he kissed me and I felt really bad for it.
101
Chapter 5
Bonfire
102
The young girl on the floor started to move a little. Grace had been staring at the symbols in the room trying to understand a pattern…any at all. Maybe she could find a way to escape this, doubtful but she still had to try. The girl pulled her legs up and started to push herself up. She looked to Grace and immediately shot backwards against the wall. Obviously Caine had not given her the courtesy of a glamor, so she knew exactly what was happening.
“Please...please don't hurt me,” she whispered.
Grace stood up and looked at her.
“I have no intention of hurting you, I promise you that.”
The girl started to look around the windowless room.
“What is your name.”
The girl looked at Grace confused still.
“Ummm...I...my name is Elin,” Elin stuttered.
“Well Elin, my name is Grace.”
“How did you end up with Caine, Elin?”
“I... I am with a host family in Valon… I wanted to leave, my brother and I left...
