I head into the chapel and close the door behind me. All my brothers are sitting around the table, waiting to hear what I’ve gotta say, and I ain’t sure how they’re gonna take this. But they’re gonna listen.
‘Y’all know how much this club means to me, right?’
I look around the table as I sit down, leaning forward and clasping my hands together.
‘It means everything. It gave me a fucking life, for Christ’s sake. But it ain’t always been a good place. Me and my brothers back in North Carolina, we ain’t always done good things. I was born into this world, it’s all I know, all I was brought up to do. But people change. Even people like me.’
‘D’you wanna get to the point, Mack, only, Cora’s on stage in an hour and I think there’re a few of us here who’d like to get down to Six to witness her twisted shit.’
I throw Zeb a look when I really just wanna break his fucking jaw, but I’m trying to be nice here. I can do nice. I just don’t always want to. ‘People change. And I want this club to change. Which is why I want us to move away from that outlaw image…’
‘You fucking kidding me?’ Zeb laughs and, yeah, my fist’s itching to connect with that perfect jaw line. ‘What’re you saying, Mack? Suddenly being a one percenter ain’t good enough no more?’
‘Jesus, boss, you going fucking soft on us?’ Hal joins in. ‘You want us to become the kinda club that organizes summer fetes and yard sales and…’
I slam my fist down hard on the table, and that shuts ‘em up. ‘No-one’s going fucking soft, y’hear me? And no-one’s talking about turning this club into the kinda place your mom could hang out in…’
‘Then what are you talking about?’ Hal asks. ‘’Cause I didn’t come here to sell raffle tickets to old ladies.’
‘We got legitimate businesses round here. We got shit we can work on that don’t nececcsarily involve us risking our freakin’ lives every time we set foot outside this clubhouse.’
‘And what if we get off on that shit?’
I look at Zeb, and as my V.P. he should at least pretend to back me up on this one, but he don’t seem in a hurry to do that. ‘I ain’t saying we suddenly turn into saints. But maybe it’s time to start distancing ourselves from the kinda crap we don’t need.’
I glance around the table again, and I know I ain’t winning this one. And maybe there’s a part of me that, yeah, he’s tired of all the fighting and the repercussions. Maybe I’m starting to see a different kinda future out there. Shoot me. I ain’t entitled to change?
‘You seriously want us to think about this?’ Blade, my Sargeant-at-Arms, asks as I give the signal for them all to go. Church is over. ‘Cause I ain’t sure you got everyone on board here, Mack. I mean, where the hell did that come from, huh?’
I trail a hand through my hair and sigh quietly. I need a drink now, a fucking big one. ‘I gotta lot on my mind, Blade. Guess not all my ideas are hitting the right shots here.’
He throws me a look that tells me I gotta get my shit together, and fast, and maybe he’s right ‘cause I’m feeling a sense of déjà vu here I don’t fucking need. ‘You gonna be at Six later?’
‘Yeah. Just got a couple of things to finish off here first.’
‘OK.’
‘Keep an eye on things for me, Blade. All right? First night and all that, don’t want no trouble.’ I watch him leave before I turn to face Zeb, who’s still sitting at the table. ‘You not joining them? I thought you were all desperate to see Cora do her thing.’
‘You touch my wife, Mack, and you don’t wanna know what’ll happen.’
Jesus. I need this. ‘I ain’t interested in Izzi no more, Zeb. OK?’
He stands up and kicks his chair back, his expression darkening as he comes closer, but he don’t intimidate me. He never has done, and he ain’t starting now. ‘You’re distracted, brother. And it don’t take a genius to work out what’s got you that way; what’s slowly destroying you. Because you ain’t the man you used to be, and I think even you know that.’
‘You think you know me that well, huh? Because you know shit, Zeb.’
‘You don’t think I don’t see the way you look at her?’
‘Jesus, what the fuck is this? Some high school prom night face-off? I ain’t interested in Izzi. So back the fuck off before I do something I probably ain’t gonna regret.’
‘Tough words, Mack. From a man who, all of a sudden, don’t wanna fight no more.’
I swear, it’s all I can do not to lay him out. But he’s my V.P. As a man I could easily live without him, but this club needs him. So I’m gonna try not to hurt him too much.
‘Back off, Zeb.’
‘You still dream about her, huh? You still want to be where I am, every fucking night? Inside that beautiful, tight pussy of hers, making her scream, feeling her come… but she don’t want you no more, Mack. She don’t want you.’
‘You sure about that?’
Yeah, I know I’m goading him, so I probably deserved the punch he lands on my jaw, but any ideas about me going soft are put to fucking bed as I retaliate immediately. He ain’t even got time to take a breath before my fist connects with his cheek, slamming his head back against the wall and I pull my knife from my pocket and push it against his throat, my face right up in his because I’m in no fucking mood right now. Not for him, not for any of this shit. Because he’s touched a fucking nerve? Yeah, he has, I ain’t gonna lie. I want his wife straddling me, riding me, taking my cock deep while she brings herself off, I want all of that. I want Izzi, but I ain’t gonna admit that to his face. What am I? Fucking suicidal?
‘You’re messing with someone you really don’t wanna mess with, Mack. And I ain’t in no mood to be fucked over.’
I pull the knife away and laugh in his face, stepping back from him, but I know this game, and I’m ready for him as he lunges towards me, the punch he slams into my stomach winding me slightly and I stagger back, but I keep hold of that knife. One more move from this jackass and I’m using the fucker. And he tries, Jesus, he really ain’t in a good mood tonight, but again I’m no amateur, and I grab him by his cut and throw him back against the wall, the knife once more pressed against his throat.
‘What the fuck’s going on?’
Izzi’s voice don’t even make me flinch, I don’t take my eyes off Zeb, his expression verging on almost manic. Man, he really is one fucked-up bastard. ‘You two had some kinda falling out, darlin’? ‘Cause your man here, he’s sure as hell mad about something.’
‘Get away from him, Mack.’
‘You got her fighting your battles now, huh?’ I sneer in his face, and I know that’s only gonna push him even more but I don’t care. And I’m done here anyway. I ain’t wasting no more time on this crap. I drop my hand and step back, tucking my knife away. ‘This ain’t worth my time.’
Zeb runs a hand over his hair and throws Izzi a look that tells her he ain’t happy with her intervention. He’s pissed as hell.
‘Just remember what you are around here, Zeb. All right? You’re my V.P. You ain’t in fucking charge.’
‘And you’re a President who don’t deserve that role.’
I raise an eyebrow. He wants to go again? I can do this all night. ‘You think you can do better?’
‘Right now, Mack, Izzi could do better.’
Jesus!
‘If you two are gonna have a pissing match I’m out of here.’ Izzi turns to go, and I look over at Zeb, but he’s got his head down now. He looks almost defeated. Is there something going on I don’t know about? Have him and Izzi really had some kinda falling out, ‘cause I only said all that to wind him up, I didn’t know it was true.
‘Something going on between you two?’ I ask, and he looks up slowly, but his eyes are calmer now. The blackness has gone.
‘Me and Izzi are fine.’
‘She don’t seem to be a fan of yours right now.’
‘She ain’t exactly singing your praises either, brother. And me and Izzi, we ain
’t your business.’ He steps forward, but I don’t sense no more shit kicking off now. I think we’re both done. ‘Stay away from her, Mack.’
He walks away and I drop my head and breathe in deep. I don’t know what the fuck that was all about, but I know one thing for sure now. Things really are gonna be different ‘round here…
Zeb
That shit back at the clubhouse, that shouldn’t’ve happened. I let my guard down, let Mack get to me, and I’m fucking angry about that; pissed that Izzi stepped in, man, she made me look like a jerk. But this crap with Kes, it’s fucking with my head.
‘That looks sore.’ Kit lights up a cigarette and leans back against the wall beside me.
‘Shouldn’t you be inside?’
‘We not allowed breaks now?’ She takes a drag on her cigarette and narrows her eyes as she looks at me. ‘What’s the other guy look like?’
I light up my own cigarette and draw deep. ‘It’s nothing.’
‘Don’t look like nothing to me. You should let me clean that up for you. We got a first aid kit inside, I can sort those cuts out for you…’
‘I don’t need no cleaning up, OK?’
She lets out a low whistle and finishes her cigarette, stubbing it out on the wall behind her. ‘Over a girl, was it?’
‘Listen, sweetheart, keep that pretty nose outta shit that don’t concern you.’
‘Sometimes talking about it can be good, y’know?’
‘I ain’t one for talking.’
She digs her hands into her pockets and stares out ahead of her. ‘I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say…’ She turns to look at me, and there’s a part of me that wishes she’d go away. I kinda wanna be on my own for a while. I got too much crap to think about and she’s just getting in the way. But there’s another part of me that wants her to stay. ‘This is over a woman, right?’
‘Jesus…’ I laugh and drop my gaze, shaking my head. ‘You really don’t know when to stop, do you?’
‘I’m not the kind of girl that takes no for an answer.’
I look back up at her, and I move so I’m in front of her, right in her space, our eyes locked. She wants to play? I can do that. ‘What kinda girl are you then, darlin’?’
She licks her lips and smiles. ‘The kind of girl who isn’t afraid of playing with fire.’
I laugh again, and I move a little closer to her, leaning in to her until my mouth almost touches hers. And I hear her gasp, and I smile, too. ‘Getting burned can really hurt, sweetheart. So, if I were you I’d back off, you got that?’
‘You don’t like taking risks?’
Man, this one ain’t scared of shit. ‘Not every risk’s worth taking.’
She smiles again, and I can almost feel her tits pushing against me. ‘You don’t know what you’re missing,’ she breathes, and my cock starts to react but I know when to step away. And that time’s now.
‘I think I can live with the disappointment.’
I pull back from her, but she ain’t one for giving up easy. ‘You’ll be back.’
‘You reckon?’
She reaches out to touch my cheek but I grab her wrist and pull her hand away.
‘Don’t touch what ain’t yours, darlin’.’
She looks at me, and I know exactly the kinda girl she is now. ‘Your wife used to sleep with your President, didn’t she? Your cousin.’
My grip on her wrist tightens slightly as I stare her down. ‘That ain’t none of your business.’
‘He came looking for her – Mack. Didn’t he? Just not sure he expected you two to end up married, huh?’
‘You gotta learn when to keep that mouth of yours shut, sweetheart.’
‘She still got feelings for him, though, right? That the reason your face is all messed-up?’
I squeeze her wrist even tighter, but it don’t seem to bother her, she’s still looking right at me like she don’t give a crap what I do to her.
‘You need a woman who doesn’t have that kind of baggage, Zeb. A woman who can concentrate solely on you.’
I drop her arm and step away from her. ‘You’re playing a dangerous game here.’
‘Like I said, I’m not afraid to play with fire.’
‘Maybe you should be.’
She should. Maybe…
Mack
There’s that old saying, right? Give someone enough rope and eventually they’ll hang themselves. Looks like I ain’t gonna have to throw too much more at my cousin. It’s like Kit was sent from heaven to make my job a hell of a lot easier, but there’s still this part of me that’s struggling with the kind of betrayal I’m wishing for here. I want Izzi, but she don’t belong to me, not anymore. She belongs to my V.P. And I always made it clear that no-one in my club goes after another brother’s old lady, it just ain’t done. Yet here I am giving myself permission to do the one thing we just don’t do. We’re a brotherhood. We stick together, play by our rules, but I’m breaking mine.
I watch as Kit pursues her goal with dogged determination, and although Zeb’s backing off this time, that girl is gonna push him, I know she is. And I was gonna encourage her, y’know? Try to make sure she drove a wedge between Zeb and Izzi that pushed them so far apart they’d never find a way back. But I might not actually have to work too hard to achieve that after all. Looks like someone’s gonna be doing that job for me. So, what does that mean, huh? What do I do now? Sit back and wait for Izzi and Zeb’s marriage to crumble around them? And then what? Step in and play the knight in shining armor? Offer her a shoulder to cry on? Deep down I know that’s still wrong. She’d still be Zeb’s, I’d still be taking her from him and I can’t be seen to do that. Not as President. Not as any member of this club. It just ain’t done.
I drop to my haunches and bow my head, breathing in deep because I know what I have to do now. It’s the only thing I can do, if I really want Izzi that badly.
So, I have two decisions to make here.
How much do I really need this club?
How much do I really want Izzi?
Izzi
I pick up the bottle of bourbon and set it straight back down again. I don’t want another drink. I actually want to keep a clear head, which is probably more than Zeb’s doing right now. Because I know where he is. He’ll be at Six, watching those girls do everything I used to do before I became his. And I know I knew exactly what I was signing up for when I married him; when I became his property, because that’s what I am. Mack’s right. Zeb owns me. And I’m OK with that, most of the time. Or I was. But seeing him and Mack tonight, at each others’ throats, over what I don’t know… seeing that, it’s kicked up all sorts of crap that I thought only bourbon and pizza would sort out. The pizza helped ease the growls of hunger my stomach was throwing out, but the bourbon only clouded my judgement, so I’m leaving that alone now.
I head upstairs and step under a warm shower, washing the day away. And maybe I should have gone to Six too, I mean, it’s opening night, and I’m married to the club’s V.P. But I doubt Zeb’ll miss me. I know what he can be like when he’s pissed about something, and I don’t always want to be around that. I just hope the trouble I witnessed between him and Mack doesn’t spill over into Six.
I go into the bedroom and turn on some music, losing myself in Joe Bonamassa’s rasping rock/blues as I rub lotion into my damp skin, and I slowly feel myself start to relax. Zeb just needs to let off some steam, for some reason. He’s got something on his mind, that’s obvious, but I’m not sure it’s my place to push him on that score. I’m still learning what it really means to be the wife of an outlaw. And I don’t think asking too many questions is part of my job.
Wrapping a short robe around myself I go back downstairs, into the kitchen, and grab another slice of pizza from the open box on the counter, eating it as I clear up mugs and plates still left over from breakfast. And then I hear the front door slam shut. Zeb’s back. And my stomach does a tiny flip, and I’m not sure whether that’s out of excitement or fear, today�
�s kind of messed with my head a bit. And Mack’s words; the way he looked at me as he said those things, it still makes me feel sick.
‘You weren’t at Six.’
I turn to see Zeb throw his cut over a chair before he opens the fridge and gets himself a beer, biting off the top and downing a long mouthful.
‘The mood you were in I’m surprised you cared whether I was there or not.’
He stops drinking and locks eyes with me, and I feel a shiver tear through me, but it’s not in a good way. And then he sets his beer down on the table and strides towards me, not stopping until he’s right in front of me, his eyes dark and angry and, yeah. He’s drunk. I can smell the alcohol on his breath. ‘You’re my fucking wife, Izzi. And tonight you should have been by my side, showing me some fucking support, so where were you, huh?’
‘Where do you think I was, Zeb?’ I step back from him. He isn’t doing this to me, I don’t deserve that. I wasn’t the one in the wrong tonight.
He smiles, and then he laughs quietly as he drags a hand over his shorter hair. ‘Where did you want to be, Izzi?’
‘Go to bed, Zeb. You’re drunk.’
He grabs my wrist and I try to yank it free but he’s too strong. ‘You don’t tell me what to do, darlin’. You got that? Remember your fucking place.’
I manage to wrench my arm free of his grip, my eyes boring into his, and I’m glad I stayed pretty much sober. That makes me the one in control here.
‘I need another drink,’ he mutters, turning away and going back over to the fridge, fetching himself a fresh beer.
‘That solves everything, huh? Another drink.’
Betrayed (Soldiers of Darkness MC Book 2) Page 5
