by Emily Childs
As I round a large potted plant, I hear laughter and faint music from across the hallway. What would an orthopedic wing in a hospital be without the cheerful therapy staff to work those broken bones and joints? I stop to enjoy the scene in the gym for a few breaths—I have seven minutes until the start of my shift, and the front desk is only ten feet away. There is time.
Patients with bandages on knees, hips, shoulders, anywhere you can imagine, lift weights, struggle up boxy stairs built specifically for treatment, or shed tears as therapists torture with smiles on their faces. I’ve always been a little envious of the relaxed environment on the therapeutic side; especially days when I’ll dart between room calls and medications and skin checks. My shoulders slump simply thinking of the unavoidable rush.
“Whoa, hold up, Lou. Excuse us, coming through.”
You know those voices that just sound handsome? The excuser behind me has one of those voices.
I back out of the doorway with a smile, and turn to find a therapist facing his patient, a tall man with two thick bandages lining twin scars over his kneecaps. The patient grins at me before he leans onto a silver walker and winces with each step.
“Doing great,” I say and back up, so the therapist can squeeze past.
The guy flashes me a white smile and my lungs topple out the soles of my feet. By the way his eyes widen, and he chuckles, I imagine he feels much the same.
“Are you kidding me? Elle, is that you? Take a rest, Lou—yeah, in the chair, buddy.”
The older patient obeys and plops into a narrow chair against the wall with a grateful sigh. My heart stomps in my chest like a toddler having a tantrum. What a romantic notion that no one from my ‘back then’ would recognize me. But why does it have to be him?
“Axel Olsen,” I say after the frog leaps out of my throat. “Wow, it’s been a long time. You look… the same.”
Lies! All lies. Axel Olsen isn’t the same lanky teenager I’d known. No, since the fates of Lindstrom have a vendetta against me, he’s transformed into a man, all tone, and sinew, and woodsy aftershave. Allow me to shed some light on Axel: my high school heartthrob, turned heartbreaker. Swallowing the bitter pill after scanning his chiseled face, I am forced to admit that handsome no longer belongs only to his voice.
He tilts his head, so the sunlight brightens those pale blue eyes that have always taken my breath away. The sun announces my arrival on the first floor, now the heavens betray me by casting such a delightful glow on such a delightful face. To make matters worse, the man still has the same alluring smile I forgot existed.
Don’t think of his lips, Elle.
“Really?” Axel says with a raised brow as he surveys his biceps. “I don’t know, I think I’ve changed a little.”
Any woman with eyes would have sudden dry mouth too; it isn’t just me. He smiles, knowing he’s won whatever competition starts to brew between us. I should have stomped my heel on his toes for causing my pulse to bruise my skull from its beat. Don’t let that face of utter perfection fool you, Axel isn’t a one girl sort of guy. I’d thought—in my naïve seventeen-year-old mind—that we were different during those months of high school love. Pathetic, I know. But I’m not seventeen anymore and I can practically smell what sort of guy Axel still is with his smirk; even the way he leans against the wall. Put bluntly, he isn’t the sort I plan to suffer raging heartrates over.
“Right, well I’ve got to get going.”
Axel glances at the nurses’ station. He takes in my new scrubs and white tennis shoes. “Wait, are you working here? I thought you lived in Tennessee or something.”
“North Carolina,” I say and take my first steps in the opposite direction. “I moved home, and yes, I’m starting work. Good to see you, but I’d hate to be late on the first day.”
Axel nods and his fierce eyes drill a hole to my soul as if he is reading every secret thought. “Okay.” He helps Lou the patient stand from the chair, so I get one final glimpse of those arms and inches toward the gym. “See you around, Elle.”
“Maybe,” I say over my shoulder, trying to sound as off limits as possible.
“Oh, I’ll see you around,” he says again.
Is that a challenge or a promise? Either way, he has some nerve. The fog in my head distracts me enough I strike my hip against the corner of the nurses’ station. I’m not sure, but it sounds like Axel chuckles before he disappears into the gym with Lou grumbling at his side.
Resting my open palm on the nurses’ desk, I force down the truth that I will be stuck working next door to another man who pulverized my heart. For months I’ve practiced positivity, maybe balancing the line of hippie a little too closely, but I’m starting to think this day is doomed.
Hoping for one last shot at epic coworkers, I drum my fingers until a nurse with spiky hair lifts her gaze.
“Hi, I’m Elle,” I say. “I’m supposed to start today.”
She smiles, and my mother would call her grin gummy just like she calls mine. I happen to like her smile.
“Perfect!” She shoves away from the desk and hurries to the outside before I know what’s happening. Taking my hands in hers she bounces on her toes. I mimic because who doesn’t enjoy a dance party in the hallway? “I’m so excited you’re here.” She bends at her knees to emphasize each word.
“Me too.” Finally. A person who lifts the weight of returning home rather than adding to the load.
“Come on.” She leads me through a door toward the back office. “I’ll show you around and introduce you. I’m Viv, by the way. You’ve gone through orientation, right?”
“Yep, finished last weekend.”
“Great. You’ll be following me around, just to get the hang of the wing. I’m sure you’ll be great on your own by the end of shift. It’s the documentation system that’s a little tricky.”
Viv chatters as she introduces me to each nurse, assistant, and a few surgeons wandering the halls. Two hours in, I feel at ease doing what I love again. Viv is friendly and open—probably telling me more about her boyfriend’s habits than I need to know—but she helps me feel right at home.
Home. The hard truth is, it wasn’t my choice to return to Lindstrom. Life is funny that way. When one door closes, isn’t another one supposed to open? Well, in my case the back of U-Haul opened. With my tail between my legs, three suitcases, and more than one I told you so, I came home.
The sun is set by the time I leave the orthopedic wing. I stretch my neck and offer a swift glance at the locked therapy gym. Taking a long guzzle of water from my bottle, I pretend I didn’t look, hoping to catch a glimpse at one annoyingly tempting therapist.
As I said about the word home; in my cynical opinion, home is a place that warms your heart, only to crumble at the first gust of fierce wind. I’m not about to let another house crumble. This time I’ll be cautious.
No matter how attractive blasts from the past might be, allowing anyone to mess with my clean slate simply isn’t worth the risk.
Fall in love with Axel and Elle, see old friends, and believe in second chances in A LITTLE ADO ABOUT LOVE HERE
Love Big, Em
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Bonus Scene
Jonas
I catch hold of Brita’s hand. This time she doesn’t pull away, but tangles her fingers in
mine, still she tenses. Not the painless, simply touch we’ve shared before tonight. “I would never do that to you,” I say. “Because I love you too.”
Not how I planned to blurt it out. This moment had gone a hundred different ways, but none involved anger, or Brita running away.
My palms are sweaty when she slowly eases her hand from mine, her eyes like glass. “You lied to me Jonas.”
This isn’t happening.
“For so long,” she tells me. “I really can’t believe you right now.”
“Can’t, or won’t?” My chest is tight enough to snap a rib.
“This has been one pitfall after the other,” Brita says, backing away. “My life was fine before…before you. I think I’ve had my fill of Olsen brothers for now. I’m going to go. I’ll see you in class.”
“Brita, don’t leave.” I’ve nothing left to do but beg. The way she looks at me, as though it’s the last time, burns in my chest, like something clawing its way out. But it does nothing to crack the armor she’s wrapping around herself.
She dips into Jane’s car, slams the door on me, and I am at the window in another breath. “Brita,” I shout.
She looks away. I slap the top of the car, and watch her flinch in her seat. She never looks at me, and my stomach sinks when Jane slowly drives away.
My head feels like I’ve been hit in the jaw. How did this all fall apart in ten minutes? One minute she’s against me, her skin beneath my hands, and now she’s just gone. Breaths come heavy and sharp as I watch the taillights disappear into the stormy night. I lace my fingers behind my head, pacing; if I sit still then I’ll lose it completely.
“Hey, what’s going on?” Axel asks at my back. I didn’t know he was there until his hand is on my shoulder.
I’m not angry at my brother, not really, but I shake him away anyway. “She’s gone.”
Then I see Logan. I lunge at him, but Axel holds me back. “You idiot!”
“Dude, what’s your problem?” Logan says, keeping his distance.
“What did you say to Brita?” Axel tightens his hold on my arm, good thing. I see red, and would love to see Logan with a bloody nose. “She said you told her something about me and Axel. What did you say?”
“Hey,” Axel says, “Cool it. Jonas, look at me. What’s going on?”
Meeting my brother’s eyes I draw in a deep breath, shirk him off again and keep pacing. Thoughts are spinning out of control and I’m not sure how long they watch me go back and forth before I gesture in the direction Jane drove off and say, “I’m in love with her—with Brita, okay.”
Axel looks astonished, Logan looks sick and maybe disgusted.
“Joe,” Axel starts, but I interrupt.
“She said she loved me too, that she came to tell me tonight, until you,” I shout at Logan, “told her something about Ax and me—I don’t know—sharing girls. It didn’t make sense.”
I pick up a large piece of gravel and toss it angrily into the oblivion of the night. Not the most mature reaction, but I’m in a spin—I feel out of control.
“Come on, man,” Logan says with a laugh. “I was giving her a hard time.” He pauses, and I’m grateful Axel is looking at our friend like he might throttle him too. Logan scoffs. “Seriously, I mean, seriously, you really think it would go anywhere? She’s like the plague to your family.”
I go for him again, and at least Axel has the sense to hold out his arm.
Logan softens, his voice sounds more nervous now. “Seriously?” I think he might be talking to himself. “Dude, I was just playing with her, fanning the flames, like I always do. I didn’t think . . . I didn’t know you really liked her.”
My fists clench and unclench, and I say more than a few words that would get my mom screeching at me as I groan and turn away. At my back I hear Axel talk to Logan. “Hey, give us a second, man. I want to talk to Jonas alone.”
On the edge of the parking lot are cement blocks caging in the cars from the street. I don’t care that it’s wet, or raining harder, I slump on one of the posts and stare at the black sky. Axel sighs loudly when he sits at my side. We stay there, saying nothing for who knows how long, but that is what we do. Sort of like a vibe we get and somehow we both know what to say to each other in the right moments. Our mom calls it our twin ESP.
“So, how long?”
I face him, knowing what he means. “Dude, I’ve been falling for her since we went back to school.” I drag my fingernails through my hair, shaking my head. “A few weeks ago, we actually started doing something about it though.”
“Ah,” he says with a grin. “Explains that weird Brita phone call.”
I nod and he shoves me in the shoulder. I almost smile.
“If you felt this way why did you take me to her apartment? Why didn’t you say something?”
“I didn’t know what to say,” I grumble. “And I told you she thought you were exclusive. I wanted her, but didn’t want to hurt her either.”
“I really didn’t know,” Axel mutters. “I should’ve believed you and explained what was really going on. I never meant for her to think I was her boyfriend, Jonas. I never said that, not once.”
“I know,” I say.
“I thought we told each other stuff, man,” Axel says, leaning over his knees. “Even embarrassing stuff. Like remember what happened with that girl from my chemistry class last year?”
I see the tips of his ears redden. I do remember the girl who turned stalker. In all his pride, Axel never confessed how freaked out he was except to me. To everyone else he laughed it all off until she finally moved on to someone else.
He narrows his eyes at me. “Even the weird and freaky stuff. I thought we still told each other, that’s all.”
I almost feel as bad that I’ve left Axel in the dark as I did when Brita drove away. I stare at the asphalt, my throat is drier than an onion. It’s tight and sore. “Sorry, Ax,” I say. “I should’ve said something, but this isn’t normal. I hooked you up with her, then I fell for her. A Jacobson. I thought Dad was going to pass out when I told him I hung out with her at school.”
Axel snorts. “The whole feud thing, I’m over it man. I know Bass is. Honestly, I think Mom and Dad are too, but it’s just so normal to them. I wouldn’t have cared, Joe, if you’d told me. Brita’s cool, but I don’t want a girlfriend, you know that best of all. I would’ve backed off that second.”
“I know,” I say, exasperated. “I screwed up. I get it.”
Axel slaps me on the back. “We all did. But now you’ve got to figure out what to do from this point.”
I lean forward, burying my face in my hands. “I don’t know what to do. I feel like I can hardly breathe.”
“I’m no expert, but I hear the ladies enjoy communication.”
Axel laughs as he stands. He holds out a hand to help me up, and starts guiding me back toward the school when the rain soaks through our suits and to our bones.
“You didn’t see her,” I counter once we’re inside. “You didn’t hear what she said. She really believed we—that I could just use her like she meant nothing. She said she’d had her fill of the Olsen brothers.”
“What? No one can ever get enough of us,” he says.
“Yeah, tell that to Brita.”
“There you are!” We both turn and see Shay, the girl Axel brought tonight, furious in the hallway. “You just ditch me like that and leave me with a bunch of old people.”
“Sorry babe,” Axel says, suave and confident. He nods his head at me. “Brothers trump everything.”
I think she might storm away, but she smiles with watery eyes, and rests a hand over her chest. “Oh,” she croons. “You are such a sweetie.”
Axel winks.
I roll my eyes and head toward the dark cafeteria.
“Meet you later,” I hear him say, his knuckle under her chin. She nods, charmed like he’s laced her brain with some sort of spell.
Whatever it is with Axel, he knows how to satisfy women. But I�
��m also the only breathing person who knows there was one girl who had a real grip on him once. A girl I think my brother might’ve fallen hard for, and I’m pretty sure she’s why he is what he is. He’s never let her go completely and drifts through hapless romances to bury memories. At least that is my pseudo-professional diagnosis.
Axel joins me in the cafeteria and leans against the wall. “Hey, if Brita won’t talk to you, try the roommate. You guys are cool right?”
“We were.”
He hands me his phone. “Think she’ll answer a number she doesn’t know?”
I shrug. I don’t answer unknown numbers, but maybe the fates will smile on me and Jane might. I use my phone for her number and hold my breath as I dial on Axel’s, feeling like a wimpy kid. Jane will be sympathetic to my plight; she needs to be.
I wait through three rings and three heartbeats until she picks up.
“Hello?”
“Jane,” I say in a rasp. “It’s Jonas.”
Axel perks up, listening.
“Oh, hey Joe. Brita can’t talk right now,” Jane says, there is a sadness in her voice that let me know she would have my back. At least I hope so.
“Jane please, you know I wouldn’t do that to her. Please, let me talk to her.”
“She’s in the shower, really she can’t talk. She’s torn up, though. I mean really bad. What were you and Axel thinking?”
“It isn’t like that, I swear,” I insist. “It’s a misunderstanding, really. You know me too, Jane. Would I do this?”
“Joe, I don’t know what to think. I hope you wouldn’t.”
“I wouldn’t,” I snap. “I love her.”
Jane is quiet for a long moment. “Oh, I think she’s coming. I better go.”
“Jane, wait. Please, give her the phone.”
“Joe, just give her a little time, okay,” she says softer.
Sighing, I know Brita is out of reach for the night. “Will you do something for me?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m not going to let her go so easy. Will you tell her I love her?”
