She couldn’t get enough. Logically, she knew the life-and-death situation, the stress of the long night was heightening both their reactions, driving them. It was only natural to seek life after so much death.
Illogical or not, she didn’t care. She wanted him to the very core of her being. Her breasts were heavy, her nipples taut. An ache built low in her belly. She hooked one leg around his thigh and rubbed her core against him. He was hard, the evidence of his arousal obvious.
His deep groan was thrilling and satisfying. He swept his hands down her arms and over her waist before heading back up. They barely covered her breasts before he thrust her away.
Panting, she stared at his back. What had happened? Why had he stopped? Her breathing was too heavy, the pulse of her heart too loud in her ears to allow her to hear anything. Unlike her, Zaxe was calm and centered, a blaster aimed at the path below.
Humiliation washed over her. While she’d been totally into what was happening between them, he’d been detached enough to hear someone coming. Good thing one of them was being smart. She rubbed the back of her hand over her mouth and steadied herself.
Baraj rounded a turn and stopped. He had his blaster up. “What’s taking so long?” He was smirking when he glanced in her direction. She glared back and raised her blaster. No way could he know what they’d been doing. Could he? He was guessing, the bastard, trying to put her off stride.
“It took as long as it took.” Totally unperturbed, Zaxe motioned to Baraj with the barrel of his blaster. “Let’s go.”
“I’m not walking with you at my back.”
“You should have thought of that before you came up here.”
She bit her bottom lip to keep from smiling. Both men were vying for dominance. She had no doubt which one would win.
Baraj growled, spun around, and hurried back the way he came. Zaxe didn’t immediately follow. “You okay?”
“You keep asking me that and my answer is always the same.” Straightening the strap on her shoulder, she shrugged to settle the pack. “I’m fine.” And she would be as long as she remembered to watch out for herself. Zaxe wanted her. There was no feigning the erection he’d had, but maybe it was more a result of adrenaline brought on by the fighting. “We’ll forget what happened here.” She brushed past him. “The aftermath of the battle heightened our physical reactions. Totally normal.” She prayed only she heard the quaver in her voice.
“Normal?” He was right beside her. She didn’t dare look at him. He was too perceptive not to see the unease in her eyes.
“Sure. We’re both healthy adults. It’s natural to seek to validate life after being surrounded by such death.”
“Good thing you were with me and not Baraj.”
She swung around, leading with her fist before she thought about what she was doing. She pulled back and dropped her arm. “Yeah, good thing.” If that was what he thought of her, she was better off without him.
He swore long and fluently. “That was uncalled for. I apologize. I know better. And I’m frustrated.”
He wasn’t the only one. Her core was throbbing and her skin itched.
“Forgive me.” When he touched her shoulder, all the fight went out of her.
They had to settle this before they went any further. The throbbing behind her eyes was getting worse. The day was already too warm for comfort and the sun had barely risen. “I’m sorry, too. That was as much my fault as yours.” She could have told him no instead of grabbing him.
“It’s no one’s fault. This isn’t the place to discuss this. When this is over, there will be time for us.”
“Sure.” He might believe what he was saying, but she didn’t. Not that he was intentionally lying, but when his job was done, he’d leave. It seemed she’d spent her entire life picking up the pieces of her life after men left her. First her father, then her brother, and now him.
I’m done.
She couldn’t keep doing this. Couldn’t keep opening herself up only to be hurt. Hardening her heart shouldn’t be difficult since she was mostly there. She wasn’t taking sex off the table, but her emotions were strapped down tight. Virginity wasn’t something she prized since she’d never planned to marry. There’d never been a man she’d wanted to risk being physically vulnerable with before she’d met Zaxe.
New plan—rescue her brother, go home, get Reman off her back, and figure out what to do with the rest of her life. And if the opportunity presented itself, she’d have sex with Zaxe. Then she’d know what the fuss was all about and could forget about it. In time, he’d be nothing more than a memory. With any luck, he’d be a fond one.
Her heart would be safe. She had no expectations. It was easier that way.
“Let’s move.” She shrugged off his hand and walked away.
****
Something had changed. Jamaeh had emotionally closed down between one heartbeat and the next. He cursed himself in a dozen languages. If his sisters heard what he’d said to her, they’d kick his ass, and rightfully so.
But hearing her talk about what had happened between them as nothing more than adrenaline and the situation had pierced both his heart and ego. Like the assassin he was, he’d gone on the offense, striking back at her verbally. The jab about Baraj was a grave insult to them both.
He’d never been this involved, this distracted by a woman. The idea of her kissing another man, caressing him, letting him touch her made him crazy. There was nothing he could do if she chose to give her attention to another. They weren’t dating, had no commitments. And she was a vibrant, beautiful woman.
I’ll kill any man who touches her.
Zaxe shook his head. If he didn’t get his head out of his ass, he’d get them both killed. Following her lead, he fell back on the training of his youth. Controlling his physical and emotional responses was second nature, or had been. Since they’d escaped the clutches of Artemis, he’d been lax in his mental exercises. Physically, he was in the best shape of his life. Emotionally, he’d dropped his guard.
Ice encased his heart. It was a lonely way to live, but it was the only way to survive the battle ahead. Protecting Jamaeh would take a physical and emotional toll, but he’d pay it, and pray there would be time for them when the mission was done.
More likely, the king of Gravas would call him back. Gripping the blaster, he eased around Jamaeh, taking the lead once again. The king could call, he was done. It was time for him to seek his destiny. His sisters would be fine without him. Their husbands would protect them.
The driving force in his life, the thing that had kept him going, kept him alive, no longer existed. They didn’t need them. The truth was he needed them. Who was he without them? The path before him was cast in darkness.
The pain in his heart almost dropped him to his knees. He staggered, falling against the rocks. “What’s wrong? You’re hurt, aren’t you?” Jamaeh was beside him, running her hands over his arms and chest. The remote look was gone from her green eyes, replaced by concern.
The ice around his heart cracked. His shields, his good intentions, were nothing against her caring. He started to tell her he was fine, but stopped. “I’ve killed many times.” It was best she understood who he was. “Not once have I ever reached for a woman after.”
Her eyes widened and she swallowed hard and nodded. “I haven’t killed anyone until today, but I’ve been in some tight situations. I’ve never once reached for a man after.”
Gods, she was incredible. After everything, she was trying to reassure him. He didn’t deserve her, but he would.
“Let’s just say we’re both a little emotional right now and leave it at that. Okay?” She nibbled on her lower lip and glanced away. Like their physical relationship, now was not the time for an in-depth talk. Baraj would be back if they didn’t show soon.
“Okay.” He’d let it go for now. He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. “Thank you.” She was more forgiving than he’d be if the situation were reversed.
“For what?” When he
released her, she curled her fingers, bringing her hand to her chest. The gesture was telling and settled him
“For being you.”
She tilted her head to one side, her expression one of concern.
He knew he was confusing the hell out of her. Welcome to the club.
As they continued on in silence, he let his gaze play over the horizon, scanning back and forth, watching for any movement. He used the trek to plan, playing out scenarios, refining some and casting aside others. Whatever actions he took, he had to factor Jamaeh into the mix. Baraj wasn’t a problem. If he became one, he’d be dealt with. Zaxe didn’t see himself as ruthless, but pragmatic. As long as Baraj didn’t double-cross them, he’d live. If he came after him or Jamaeh, Zaxe would take him out.
The other man was pacing at the bottom of the canyon. “Took your own sweet time,” he complained.
“There’s a fairly large group headed toward us.” Behind him, Jamaeh gasped.
Baraj swore. “How many?”
“Undetermined. Still too far out.”
“Then how do you know they’re there?” he challenged.
“Dust. That many people raise a cloud of dust as they move.”
Jamaeh slipped the pack from her back and crouched, placing it on the ground. She dug out a container of dried fruit and opened it. “We need to eat while we can.” She offered it to him, hesitated, and then held it out to Baraj. His gaze narrowed, but he took a handful, giving her a nod. Then she helped herself.
Relaxing against the stone wall, he munched on the flavorful snack. Baraj devoured his and wiped his hand on his pants. “Well?”
“Well, what?” Zaxe asked. Beside him, Jamaeh ate, but kept one hand on her blaster and watched Baraj.
“What’s the plan?”
“Better cover here. We let them come to us. Then we negotiate.”
“That’s your plan? We negotiate? These are outcasts.” Baraj spat after he said the word.
“They’re people,” Zaxe reminded him. “And everyone wants something. Once you discover what it is, life gets easier.”
Jamaeh tensed and then slowly relaxed. Did she think he was playing her? Nothing he could do about that now.
“And what do you want?” Baraj asked.
“To complete my mission.” Because only then would his debt to the king of Gravas be discharged. Only then would he be free to pursue a life of his own. A life that included an opportunity to see where things went with Jamaeh.
“Jamaeh wants her brother free and safe,” Zaxe continued. “You want to make sure Reman’s interests are protected. If we work together, we all get what we want.” He glanced toward the canyon opening. Waves of heat danced over the sands as the sun rose higher. The cloud of dust was larger now. “They’ll be here soon. Are you in?”
“Yes.” Baraj drank from his own flask, attaching it back to his hip.
“Jamaeh?”
She’d tugged her pack back on. “I’m in.”
He wished she’d look at him, wished he knew what she was thinking. “We need to collect the sand sleds that are still working and hide them, gather any supplies that the four-legged scavengers didn’t make off with last night, and take cover.” He gazed toward the growing dust cloud. “I’d say we have a half hour before we need to be in place.” Zaxe wanted to make sure there was one working sled on his side in case he needed to send Jamaeh away while he covered her. “We’ll take up positions on either side of the canyon. You take the one you cleared and we’ll take this one.”
“You’re taking her with you again?” Baraj shook his head. “She should come with me this time.”
“We need to split up,” she interjected. “There are three of us. As Zaxe pointed out, we all have a stake in this.” She raised her blaster. “I can shoot.”
He hated it, but she was right. “Fine. You take our side. Baraj, you take the opposite one.”
“And where will you be?” she asked.
“Down here.”
Chapter Ten
Jamaeh’s heart was surprisingly steady as she lay on the ground and looked down at the canyon below. Baraj was in position on the opposite side and at a higher elevation than her. Zaxe was tucked into a crevice on the ground. The man was certifiable. She wanted him up here with her, even though it made more sense to spread out.
Before she’d gotten into place, he’d dragged one of the sand sleds to the base of the path with the order that she use it to flee if things got too bad.
As if she’d do such a thing.
There was no retreating, and not only because she was concerned about Esau. She swiped at the sweat on her brow and squinted to see better. The riders were taking shape. Some on sand sleds, others on horses. Her clothing was stuck to her skin. Not the most comfortable thing in the world, but she didn’t move and kept her weapon hidden behind a rock so they wouldn’t catch a glint of the metal in the light.
It took an effort to relax her shoulders. They were hunched, the muscles complaining. She flexed her fingers and wiped her palms on her cloak. The last thing she needed was to lose her grip on her blaster.
“Come on,” she muttered. Each minute seemed an hour. The waiting was interminable, especially because she couldn’t see Zaxe. The air was stifling, with barely a breath of wind. An insect buzzed in her ear. She wanted to swipe at it but remained still. Three outriders reached the mouth of the small canyon.
“Hello,” the man in the lead yelled. He was past middle-aged, the dark hair showing from beneath his hood laced with gray. Deep grooves of time were cut into his face by his mouth and eyes.
None of them answered.
She bit her bottom lip and eased her blaster into position, taking aim, not at the leader but the man to his right. Zaxe would target the leader. Baraj should have the other one in his sights.
The rest joined the men. She counted eighteen. They were a ragtag bunch—their clothing and sand sleds worn but functional—but they all had weapons that looked brand new. They put their money into what mattered.
There was some talking among them, but nothing she could make out. She was too far away. Then the men edged toward one side of the canyon.
“Halt,” Zaxe called.
Every blaster was drawn. But this was a smart group and they separated, one-third of them going to the right side, one the left, and the remaining facing the canyon. Some crouched behind their vehicles. Others rushed toward the cliff face, keeping their backs to the wall.
“Who are you?” the leader demanded.
“Who are you?” Zaxe shot back. It was so like him, she grinned.
“Qasim.” He threw back his hood and dismounted from his horse. The older men seemed to favor the animals over the machines. “Did you kill all the men?”
“They ambushed us. We had no choice.”
“Not many venture into our territory.” It wasn’t a question, but it was implied.
“I’m looking for someone.” Hearing Zaxe’s voice, knowing he was alive and well, if not exactly safe, helped to calm her racing heart.
“You still haven’t told me who you are,” Qasim chided. “I don’t do business with strangers.” She had to hand it to him, the old guy had courage.
“Zaxe.”
She waited and almost smiled as Qasim tilted his head to one side. “That’s a weapon, not a name.”
“I get that a lot.” Zaxe walked out from behind cover, hands in the air, blaster holstered at his side. “But it’s my name.”
She was going to kill him. That was if the outcasts didn’t. Why was he out from behind cover? Jamaeh eased farther out so she’d have a better angle.
“You might want to tell your friend up there to stop moving. Makes it easy to see him.”
Shit! He’d seen her. Qasim seemed more amused than worried.
“He gets hurt, you’ll be the first to die,” she called.
“A woman.” Qasim’s eyebrows shot up. “Most unusual.”
“We’re an unusual bunch.” Zaxe continued forwa
rd, as if he were taking a simple stroll down the street, not confronting eighteen armed and dangerous men. The man had ice for blood. No wonder the heat didn’t seem to bother him.
“You’re looking for someone, you said?”
“Yes.”
Qasim raised his hands and shrugged. “Many men come here because they do not wish to be found.” He frowned and took a step forward, tilting his head to one side. “Have we met? You seem familiar. Remove your sunshades and your hood so I can see your face.”
Her stomach clenched. The vendor in the market had claimed to recognize Zaxe, to have known his father. Just who was Zaxe?
“Answer my question first.” His voice was calm with no hint of stress or strain.
Qasim shook his head. “The young are always so impatient. Very well, who do you seek?”
“Helldrick.”
Weapons that had lowered slightly snapped back up. The old man sighed. “That is not someone you should seek.”
“Yet, I do seek him. I have business.”
“Ah.” There was a sense of disappointment, of judgment. Were the outcasts not friendly with her father? “He comes. He goes. We prefer when he is gone, but he does as he chooses.”
Her face heated with shame. Even among outcasts, her father wasn’t wanted. There was little wonder life had been tough for her and her brother. “I’m not him,” she muttered under her breath. She wasn’t afraid of honest work, of hard work. Life would have been much easier if she’d taken the easy road of thieving or becoming a man’s mistress.
“I’m here to permanently remove your problem.”
Qasim’s gaze narrowed. “Is that so? Remove your sunshades and hood.”
Zaxe tossed back the hood and removed his shades, tucking them into a pocket. The older man paled and took a step back. Several more of the older members of the group began to point and whisper amongst themselves. “Come. We will talk.”
“What about the men we killed?”
Yeah, why weren’t they more upset about that? Why hadn’t they already opened fire? She didn’t trust them.
Qasim threw back his head and laughed. Okay, not exactly the reaction she’d expected. “What about them? They’re Helldrick’s men. All cutthroats and thieves. We’ve been trying to be rid of them for years. You have done us a service.”
Zaxe's Rule (Assassins of Gravas Book 4) Page 9
