The aftershocks roll through her as I nip at her collarbone. Her hands shake as she reaches between us. She leans back fumbling with the buttons on my jeans.
“Baby, you don’t have to,” I tell her knowing that the minute she frees my cock, I might lose it all over her hand.
She bites her bottom lip and looks at me. “I cheated death, Axel. I want to live. I want to feel every inch of you.”
With those words she finds a new confidence and my jeans are undone. Reaching between us, she grips my thick shaft and licks her lips as she takes in my piercing.
“Condom,” I groan, trying not to shift her and impale her for my own needs.
“I’m on the pill, and well,” she pauses and doesn’t continue her statement. “I want to feel you, Axel. After everything, I need to feel you raw.”
Well, I don’t have be told twice. I don’t bother letting her stand to remove her panties, but rather rip the material from her body.
Putting my hand over hers, I guide my cock to the slickness of her pussy. Rocking, I work her up to take me. She moans as her pussy envelopes my cock, and I groan from the tension. She has a vice grip on me as I press inside her, inch by inch, breaking her virginal barrier. I still myself letting her get adjusted. Before I can do anything, her eyes meet mine and she begins to move.
I’m in ecstasy. Lost in the sensations as she stares at me while I keep my eyes on her. With my thumb, I work her clit, while my free hand kneads her ass cheek. She rocks, rolls, and moves up and down all without breaking the hold her eyes have on mine.
I’ve never felt so raw, so naked, with a woman, even though I still have my shirt and pants on.
Moving my hand from her ass to her nipple, I tweak it at the same time I feel her building over me. She cries out as her pussy clamps around my dick, and she finds her release, sending me over the edge with her.
She lays limp against me trying to cover her body. After the most intimate sexual encounter of my life, she wasn’t about to take her eyes off me now.
“Yesnia, baby, let me see you.”
Shyly, she pushes back and meets my gaze.
“What’s wrong, baby?” I ask, genuinely concerned and trying to get my breathing back to normal.
“Was I …” she whispers and trails off.
Then it dawns on me. “Have you ever?” I ask, seeking confirmation of what I’m pretty sure I felt and she begins to shake her head before I can even finish my question.
I smirk in pride. Fuck yes. I had her first, and I filled her with my cum.
My cock throbs, my balls ache for more, but all is right with my soul knowing her first time was with me.
She gave me a gift. Pure. Raw. Unfiltered.
Then she left me torn to shreds.
Who laid beside her tonight? Who held her close?
What I wouldn’t give for one more taste of her.
4
Yesnia
When it comes right down to it … you can only depend on yourself.
“Why don’t you come with us?” Mom asks me for what feels like the millionth time.
I sigh. I know she thinks a vacation will fix my mood. The truth is nothing can fix me. I made a bad decision. One rooted in fear and misplaced loyalty.
I love my family. I love this life I have with my mom and dad in Chicago.
Except with everything being good, I still feel empty inside.
All because I sent Axel away.
I still don’t think the life as an ol’ lady to a biker is for me. At the same time, I feel lost without Axel. We have an unexplainable connection. He has seen me at my worst, and still he was and is my strength.
Inhaling deep, the smell of antiseptic fills my nose. My eyes are tightly closed, and I’m in no hurry to try to open them. I listen to the continual sounds of a machine beeping in a steady rhythm.
Struggling to gain the energy, I finally force my eyes to blink. The lights are bright, my eyes burn at first and immediately I shut them once again to avoid the pain. A thick hand holds mine. It’s rough, calloused.
A man’s hand … but whose?
Where am I?
I think a hospital.
What’s wrong? Why am I here?
I fight to answer my own questions and again I blink. At first, I only see light, then things are blurry as my eyes struggle to focus.
When I finally can see clearly, his crystal blue eyes meet mine.
Axel.
He’s here.
I swallow.
It hurts.
There are IVs in me.
I start to panic.
“Shhhh, Yesnia, I got you, baby. Stay calm,” he soothes me. “Someone get the fuckin’ the doctor, she’s awake,” he yells to someone else. “I’m here, Yesnia. I got you, baby,” he repeats.
He truly meant every word.
I was selfish. Axel stayed by my side for months while I healed, and when push came to shove, I kept asking him for more.
To this day, I don’t know what prompted my dad to call Axel. When he tells the story, he swears I asked for Axel. I don’t remember it but I was so out of it, that’s a strong possibility. Even so, my dad is Javier Almanza. Why would he call a biker to come babysit me?
Really, does it matter how Axel got to me? No, because in my time of need, he was there.
How doesn’t matter. I simply know I woke up and he was there by my side.
Now that I’m healed I’ve learned a lot went on during my time tucked away. My mom didn’t know I was alive. My dad had me tucked away in a private room at the hospital, and then at an upscale penthouse with around the clock care. While I healed, my family mourned. He has a full blown mass to keep up the appearance that my Tio had indeed killed me. It’s sad to know my family is capable of such things. My dad and my Uncle Maricio were destined to destroy the good in each other, I suppose.
As for me, what does destiny have in store?
When I was a little girl I dreamed of marrying a man like my Tio, but kinder, softer. I wanted a man who would listen to me in ways Tio never heard my mother or me. Still, though I wanted that strong man where I knew I could sleep easy at night because he would protect me.
Then Uncle Maricio ripped all the good parts of him away from me when he pulled the trigger.
To keep me safe from my uncle who was on the run, my father staged my funeral. And to keep me comfortable, he called Axel because I was apparently asking for him. Healing was hard.
Heartbreak is harder.
“I’m looking forward to being alone,” I tell Mom honestly. “Love you, but I’m almost twenty-five years old. I’m perfectly capable of staying home alone for a weekend. I need this, Mom.”
That’s the thing since my injury. My mom never leaves me. I love her, but smothering me isn’t keeping me safe, no it’s driving me insane.
“If you won’t go with us, then who will stay with you?” She asks and I fight back a laugh.
“Umm … I don’t know how about the guards on payroll? There’s a concept Mom, the men who get paid to keep us safe do their job.”
She doesn’t like my reply.
“Laura can come stay, you know?”
She gives me this look, the one that says she isn’t comfortable leaving me.
“I hate taking away from her personal life. The woman met me while I laid on an operating table half dead. She was an employee then, but she’s my friend and I feel like she’s stuck babysitting me all the damn time.”
My mom jolts at my harsh words, but this is reality.
“I adore Laura. She’s my best friend. But I take up her life. Hello, Javier Almanza made her my personal assistant just so she could be with me regularly and still pay her bills. Do you realize that’s insane? Now, you want me to have her spent the night like I’m some teenager having a sleepover.”
Her eyes well up with tears. “You missed so many normal things like sleepovers. I just want to make it all better. You are still paying for my mistakes.”
Immediately,
I know it’s best I concede to this request. She’s not going to leave and feel okay about it. We’re just going to go in circles neither of us making any ground.
I sigh. “Will it give you comfort if she stays?”
My mother nods, and I instantly give in. “Okay, I’ll text Laura to come stay.”
“I love you, hija.” My mom gives me a soft smile before leaving my lavish room.
One thing about Javier Almanza—he doesn’t do anything half-way. So, when my mom said she wanted a new house for us in the suburbs of Chicago, he gave her everything she wanted. I’m thankful for it.
My father’s previous home was grand and beautiful. However, I don’t know that I could come in and out of the driveway regularly though. My life was forever changed in every single day on that pavement.
I sit in my oversized room that is bigger than the house I grew up in with my mom and her brother in Texas appreciating what I have.
It’s crazy. Even now, knowing Javier Almanza is my dad, and we have this family unit, I have trouble believing this is my reality.
Money.
He has more than enough and isn’t afraid to share his wealth with me. I drive a luxury car that costs more than some people’s houses. I have a personal assistant, but I don’t even have a job. Laura Marie Shell is my assistant, but more than anything, she’s my friend. She literally gets paid to hang out with me. It’s absurd but my father insisted. And now my mother is having her spend the weekend while they go out of town. Is she my assistant or my babysitter? I shouldn’t think of it like this because Laura truly is my very best friend.
Growing up the way I did, well Tio didn’t allow me to trust anyone. Having a real friendship, I treasure it and I don’t want Laura to later resent me.
Javier Almanza will never understand this because my Tio was his best friend and time and again he betrayed him. No, for my father, his focus is business and money.
Loyalty.
People don’t dare cross Javier Almanza. Growing up and having someone you considered a brother literally rip your eye out, well, it definitely changes a person. Loyalty is everything to my father. He doesn’t hold back and everyone knows it. The thing is my father commands respect and loyalty, but only because he gives it.
He is a ruthless business man, I don’t doubt it. The people in his inner circle, though, they have his devotion as much as they give and risk to the Almanza organization.
Love.
After what seems like a lifetime apart, my parents have worked their way back together. It’s tragic and beautiful, their story. From the slums of Juarez, Mexico to the good life in the United States, there is no love like what my father has for my mother and the same can be said of her love and devotion to him.
Even surrounded in all these good things, knowing we are on the upward turn in life together, I still feel lost.
Keeping my word to my mother, I shoot a text to Laura asking her to come over for the weekend so my mom can enjoy her vacation with my dad.
Not long after, my dad comes in to say his own goodbye. Like everything with him, he keeps it short. My father is a man of few words, but a lot of action. His actions show he cares every minute of every day. He checks in constantly. He listens when I need to talk. He will simply sit in the media room and watch some Lifetime or Hallmark movie with me, not because he enjoys it, but because he enjoys time with me.
The man missing an eye with a scar down his face looks like the kind of man that is the very worst of the worst. Only, he’s not. At least not with me. I imagine with his business he is ruthless, but I also imagine anyone in his business has to be.
Finally, I hear the alarm set. They are gone, and I have this mansion to myself.
Loneliness is emptiness, and right now, I embrace it fully. The space around me matches the feelings inside me.
A long soak in the bath relaxes me. After my skin prunes, I get out and slide into pajamas.
Going down to the kitchen, I make popcorn and grab some chocolate before heading to the media room. I hear the alarm beep as Laura lets herself in. Moments later, she set herself up beside me, digging into my bowl and getting comfortable. Girls night is beginning, and I find comfort in it.
“What are we getting lost in tonight?” she asks with a smile in her voice.
“Sons of Anarchy,” I answer, clicking the remote. “I heard this will make everyone want to fall in love with a biker.”
She laughs. “Girl, please, you don’t need some show to fall in love with a biker.”
I sigh. Yes, I’m a glutton for punishment. She knows about Axel. She even met him when he was here. They got along. Even Laura was surprised I sent him away. I thought it was for the best, but now that time has passed, I’m left with nothing but regrets.
Starting with season one, episode one, Laura and I get lost in a world of chaos and the hotness that is Jax Teller.
After three episodes, we find ourselves falling asleep so we make our way upstairs. Laura turns off at the guest suite beside my room and I make my way to my bed. Climbing between the sheets, I let the fatigue win and drift to sleep.
That moment when you begin to wake up but aren’t alert yet, that’s where I am. Vaguely, I hear a noise. Beeping. Struggling to wake up for a moment, I think I’m dreaming.
The noise stops. Yes, definitely dreaming.
I begin to drift off again.
Scuffling, shuffling, something gets my attention again. I sit up in the bed. Looking to the door, I’m in shock to see a shadow.
“Laura,” I call out. “Is that you?”
No reply.
Then I feel it.
The tension.
Something isn’t right.
No, something is seriously wrong.
“Laura,” I say again.
Silence surrounds me. Everything stills.
My pulse quickens. My head pounds. My palms sweat, and I find myself trembling slightly as the fear grips me.
I don’t dare move to turn on a light.
Thinking, I try to find something. The guards outside never enter the home. They use the restroom in the pool house to not enter our home. Who is here? The fear builds. Leaning over to the nightstand, I grab the Maglite flashlight. Twisting, there is a shadow in my room. Instantly, my reflexes kick in. Thank goodness for the thick handle of the flashlight is all I can muster to think as firm arms grab me at the waist and pull me from my bed.
Screaming, I whack the figure on the arm, the head, the shoulder. Anywhere I can make contact with the flashlight, I do. Another set of hands cover my mouth and grab my neck. I bite at the hand, listening as two men in black make their pain known.
Good.
I want them to hurt.
If they are going to take me, it won’t be without a fight.
The jab of a needle hits my neck. Fuck!
“Laura, don’t hurt Laura,” I cry out before everything goes black with thoughts of Axel in my mind.
If only I could see him one more time.
5
Axel
Rage. Unbridled. Raw. It is the most powerful emotion to exist.
Tonight, we hit up Ruthless looking for the comforts of the familiar. Honestly, I don’t give a single fuck where we go. I need to get lost.
Hawk being the friend and brother he is, well, he’s along for the fun.
Too bad since Yesnia going out no longer has the same appeal.
Entering, we pass the area that used to be booths, but is now full of tall round tables and chairs lining the wall. The middle of the space is open for the barflies that want to dance, and the back is two open rooms with pool tables and dart boards in the back corners. Mandy bartends as Ashley and Roxie work the rooms waitressing.
Hawk lifts his beer bottle and drops it on top of my longneck from beside me at the bar.
“Bastard,” I yell out before trying to gulp down as much of my beverage as possible. “Beer tappin’ is frat boy shit, you fucker,” I tease as I finish off the bottle.
; After a long run to California, a relaxing night in a room filled with Hellions is exactly what the doctor ordered. Other than the barflies, everyone here tonight is patched.
Thank fuck because honestly, I’m in no mood to deal with some entitled fuck at a bar trying to get pussy. Part of me is itching for a fight. The release of beating someone to a pulp might take the edge off the pain I feel.
Women.
No one ever prepares you for the games they play.
Sure, I could end the misery.
I could pack my shit and head to Chicago. I might even be able to talk Tripp and my dad into letting me start a Hellions charter there. Not that it would solve my problem since Yesnia’s issue is my lifestyle. On top of that, Chicago doesn’t feel like home for me.
Yesnia doesn’t understand my world though. Even in Chicago that’s not going to change.
My choices were cut and dry—my club or my life with her.
I choose my club, always.
Does it make me an ass? Maybe to some.
But this cut is as much a part of me as my heart, my brain, and even my fucking cock.
She couldn’t understand that or I should say she didn’t even let me talk to explain myself so North Carolina, I’m home.
As much as I tell myself to stop dwelling, to let the hurt and the anger go, I can’t. I want to beat the fuck out of her dead uncle. He took her mother away so Javier missed Yesnia’s childhood. He created this domino effect of bullshit that has Yesnia staying in Chicago to be with them instead of following her heart to be with me.
The heart.
A vital organ to life.
And my greatest downfall.
I’ve always been driven by my passions.
Family.
There’s not a damn thing I wouldn’t do for my family.
Motorcycles, that’s my second passion.
There is nothing that soothes my soul like being on an open road. Man and machine working together as one.
I tap the bar top for another beer. Hawk smirks as Lindsey, a known barfly, and her friend make their way to us. Lindsey has a taste for the wild, which means she’s coming over here with one thing on her mind …
Bleed for It: Hellions Motorcycle Club (Hellions Ride On Book 3) Page 5
